Disclaimer: I disclaim everything!
A/N: Song is yet another Linkin Park Song! I find that I can use mostly any of their songs and turn them into Harry Potter stories! Has anybody noticed their song Forgotten is just like CoS? It's scary! Papercut is the name of this song. IT BELONGS TO LINKIN PARK… NOT ME! This song also reminds me of Quirrell… how 'bout you?
Death - Thanks for the advice! I'll keep that in mind!
Angelika - Thank you for the ideas! I have a special twist up me sleeve, but I will put Narcissa in the story now. You gave me a good idea, thanx!
Alex Destine - Oh, don't worry. They'll talk. Maybe one fight, but then they get on okay after… can't say anymore!!!
The Almighty Benji - Thanks for the song ideas! I might use them later on when the time is right! Thanks! And Benji does rock!!!
Necrosia of the Moon and Night - phew… what a mouthful! Well, anyways, thank you. I will keep going. Ideas major!!!
Um…. It's been a long time since I wrote anything for this… I'm sorry if I missed anybody's review… thank you so much for it though! They inspired me to write more!
Chapter Three: Good and Evil
Why does it feel like night today?
Something in here's not right today
Why am I so uptight today?
Paranoia's all I got left.
I don't know what stressed me out first
Or how the pressure was fed/ but
I know just what it feels like
To have a voice in the back of my head…
The sun does not shine in my eyes when I wake. How could it? I'm in a dungeon. In Malfoy Manor mother insisted on me sleeping in a room where fresh sunshine woke me. I like it better in the dungeon. I'm alone, being that it is only June - and it is dark. I don't really know it's morning, but I can't sleep any longer. I've been awake for some time, just staring in the pits of the darkness, watching the spots in front of my eyes take shape into ungodly creatures and tear each others' heads off.
I throw myself off the bed and stagger into the common room. Everything is so dark. I can't even see two feet in front of me. I guess I should turn on some lights, but I don't feel like groping back to my room and look for my wand.
Morning, Son…
I jump backwards right into the hard, marble wall. Why can't he leave me alone? I'm not one of him anymore! How did he get into my head? I refuse to answer him. He has no control over me… he has been reduced to a mere parasite feeding off of any fear he can produce, but if I refuse to answer his calls, then he'll die… just like a parasite - just like Voldemort.
The voice inside my head laughs. My father mocks me. I know he'll never leave me. It won't be that simple. The fight for evil is real. The war has begun. I turned to the light. And that will never go unpunished.
We're coming…
It's like a face that I hold inside
A face that awakes when I close my eyes
A face watches every time I lie
A face that laughs every time I fall
[And watches everything]
So I know that when it's time to sink or swim
That the face inside is hearing me / Right underneath my skin
I leave the common room. What's the point of standing idly in the dept of darkness when life was being destroyed in the light? Dumbledore said he would see me in the morning, but the Dark Lord dwelt in Slytherin… I doubt we could get anywhere five feet from his old dormitory.
My footsteps echo loudly on the hard floor, sounding like angry swarms of Death Eaters coming down on me. I have to get myself together. When did I become so paranoid? I keep trying to tell myself I am away from all of that I once was. I am safe in Dumbledore's presence.
But somewhere deep inside me, I know I am wrong. He's still with me… always laughing and taunting. I know he will find me, and when he does Dumbledore won't be able to protect me.
My heart beats faster. I feel like running again. I feel my father's face staring from behind, and I must run from him! He'll kill me before I'll ever have a chance to set right my life he destroyed!
I hear my father's laugh again, and I take off through the dungeon halls.
I am not watching where I am running. I don't care, as long as it's far away from this place. Maybe I should leave? How could Dumbledore help me now? He probably just let me stay the night so he could have ample time on getting the Ministry here to lock me away to rot.
That's where you'll go, my ungrateful son… They'll let you rot in Azkaban next to other ungrateful followers of our Dark Lord. Nobody will help you. Nobody's your friend. Only, you better hope the Ministry does get to you first…
We're coming…
"No!" I scream. "Evil never concurs over good! This time you are on the wrong side, Father!"
It's like I'm paranoid lookin' over my back
It's like a whirlwind inside of my head
It's like I can't stop what I'm hearing within
It's like that face inside is right beneath my skin
I slam into something hard and I staggered backwards, falling to the ground. I look up, and meet the dark, glaring stare of Professor Snape, the potion master. I swallow. What's he doing here? He was one of them! I saw him with my own eyes prancing around with my father right to the right side hand of Voldemort.
Oh, that's right. Snape's a spy. My father was talking about that a while ago. Snape's spying for Voldemort. I made a metal note to report this to Dumbledore. Maybe if I list off some of Voldemort's most faithful and dangerous followers, people will heed me seriously.
Snape glares down on me with dark, angry eyes. I should feel scared, in fact I do feel the nervousness of his stare start to creep into my veins, but I'm not frightened. I have something on him. I control his destiny. I am his downfall… and he can't do anything about it.
Unless my father can communicate to him also?
I frantically look behind my shoulder to see if anybody is coming. I thought I heard footsteps. How close is my father, really? He could appear anywhere… out of any fireplace. He would team up with Snape and kill me… slowly.
I slowly turn my head back to Snape and harden my eyes. He won't wield fear out of this Malfoy. I won't give him the satisfaction. I stand and place a careful sneer on my face.
"Good morning, Professor Snape," I growl. "Have a nice Holiday?"
Snape's eyes darken even more. I could see his hand slightly twitching near his robe opening, probably itching for his wand. I leave nothing on my face, except the famous sneer.
"What are you doing out of your common room, Malfoy?" Snape asks me, careful himself not to show any emotion.
I shrug. "Felt like getting some fresh air. The air is stale in these dungeons. It's enough to strangle you."
Snape arches an eyebrow. "You shouldn't be wondering around. The Headmaster will be seeing you soon."
"Yes," I smirk. "I have something I wish to share with him as well."
At that moment, before Snape even gets the chance to reply, Dumbledore arrives. My head, my savior.
Though his eyes seem darker then usual. His eyes have he usual gleam, but somehow it looks dimmer. I suddenly realize how old this great wizard is… and weak looking. The sneer erases from my face, but I keep my eyes hard. I will not allow them to see my fear.
"Ah, Draco," the Headmaster smiles at me. "I'm glad you are awake. Did you have a restful sleep?" I nod. "Good, good. Now if you'll please excuse us, Severus, Draco and I need to talk."
Snape nodded soundlessly, and retreated back into his dungeon without the smallest look to me. His door shut loudly, echoing ominously through the halls.
"Let's take a walk, Draco," Dumbledore says gently. We walk wordlessly until we are out of the dark dungeons. I squint against the light from the sun that has all ready been poured through the windows on the first floor. I could feel the tension in my stomach relax, and I find that I can breathe easier.
"Now, Draco," Dumbledore starts quietly, "about last night -"
I know I've got a face in me
Points out all my mistakes to me
You've got a face on the inside too and
Your paranoia's probably worse
I don't know what set me off first but I know what I can't stand
Everybody acts like the fact of the matter is
I can't add up to what you can
"Snape's a spy," I blurt out, breathlessly. I mentally kick myself. Great one, really. Make it obvious of how desperate you are.
I'm shocked to hear Dumbledore chuckling. He turns his eyes to mine, and I must have let my surprise show, for he says, "It's all right, Draco. I know."
This time I let me jaw drop. What? He knows? He allows this? "What - what do you mean, Professor? You know he's s spy? Why do you allow him here? He's gathering information for the Dark Lord! He's betrayed us all!" I snap my mouth shut. I realize how stupid I must sound. 'He's betrayed us all'? Sounds like somebody I know well.
Dumbledore shakes his head. "No, Draco. Professor Snape will not betray us." He says this almost sadly, but I'm too shocked to actually notice. How could he possibly not know? I heard him giving my father secret plans just the other week!
You can't trust anybody anymore, isn't that right, son?
"W-wait," I stutter, ignoring my father's taunts. "You don't understand. He all ready has given the Dark Lord information against you. He's all ready betrayed you! How could you say he won't?"
Dumbledore looks as if he's debating with himself. He's asking himself how much he can really trust me. I am wondering the same thing myself.
Dumbledore takes a breath before answering. "Because Severus Snape is our spy."
But everybody has a face that they hold inside
A face that awakes when they close their eyes
A face watches every time they lie
A face that laughs every time they fall
[And watches everything]
So you know that when it's time to sink or swim
That the face inside is watching you too - Right inside your skin
I'm speechless. He's Dumbledore's spy? All this time I though he was betraying the Headmaster, he was actually betraying us -I mean, them that whole time? I was wrong. What else am I wrong about? Am I ever right anymore?
Then I realize, Snape's been risking his life every day for what he believes in. He's the real soldier I had always strived to be, but my father's mold had broken. Snape's a spy for the light side… I'm a fugitive of the dark side… Snape really has one on me.
Everybody holds my destiny.
I'm not even in control of my own life anymore.
Damn you, father!
"He's your spy?" I choke out. "For how long?"
"Ever since he turned to us," Dumbledore answers.
"But how do you know he's not lying to you? I mean, giving you false information… as I'm guessing he's giving Voldemort?"
Dumbledore only smiles. "I just know. Now, onto last night."
I mentally groan. I don't want to have to explain everything… about the little girl screaming and how I only ran… how my father was leading it all. I want help without having to relive me past. Nothing in my past can help me with today. It's all against me.
"I'm sorry, Professor," I say quietly. "My father…"
"Draco, I believe you had no desire for any of that, and I know and believe you had no doing in destroying that village."
That completely blows me away. I was expecting anything but that! Again I feel uneasy on how forgiving this man is… I should feel thrilled. But I'm beginning to feel he would forgive Voldemort if Voldemort went crying to him.
"Why?" I blurt out.
Again, Dumbledore chuckles.
"Right," I smirk. "You know everything. Professor, I need your help. My father is after me and I'm going insane."
Talk about bluntness.
"You are not insane, Draco," Dumbledore says, leading me to a window overlooking the Great Lake. "Your father is haunting you because you have done the one thing he could never do… convert to the light. His voice will silence once you have learned to banish it from your mind. It's all a matter of time now."
"How do you know he haunts me?"
I watch everything…
"Draco, I can't help you on banishing your father's haunts. You must do that yourself… but I can help you on how to start."
I blink, but listen.
"You first asked me for my help, but I answer that by asking for yours."
"How can I help you if I can't even help myself?" I ask. "Don't get me wrong. I want to help! But don't you think I should control my thoughts that could betray us all before I march beside you." Then it hits me. "Professor! My father will know Snape is a spy!"
Dumbledore lowers his eyes and sighs sadly. Great! I can't even do good right! I try to do something right, then I wind up screwing it up. I destroy lives everywhere I go. I should have ran when I had the chance.
"Snape has done his purpose," Dumbledore went on. "He has a different job now… as do you. If you will accept it."
I nod without thinking. I'm not going to Azkaban after all? Dying with a purpose appealed better to me then my rotting carcass in a cell.
"When do we start?" I ask, eagerly.
Dumbledore smiles. "Not for a while. You are correct, you still need to settle in. When we will need you, you will know."
I nod. "Thank you, Professor. I promise, I won't let you down."
The sun goes down
I feel the light betray me…..
To be continued…