Thoughts and actions.
After what happened that day I was left hating Faye even more. Claire says I'm being stupid because we don't even know if they saw us but I'm positive they did. I know that I shouldn't let this bother me but it has and I don't have any idea why and I also don't know how to stop the pain I'm feeling. Claire's proved to be a great Mum and is always making sure that Owen is ok. We've moved house now and have painted the smallest room for Owen, it has lots of baby animals painted on it with a countryside background. It looks perfect just like my little boy. He knows who I am and loves to be held in my arms which is great and feels so right, I love him and Claire so much!
With Owen being one in a few weeks he's started trying to walk but hasn't had any luck at all, he keeps falling over but he doesn't hurt himself. He just starts laughing and gets straight back up to try again. Its so sweet. Owen loves the water and screams whenever you try to get him out of the bath but in the end he calms down and snuggles upto Claire and has his bottle of milk. Recently the little monkeys decided that he will wake up at about three in the morning and stay in our bed with us, which is ok I suppose but its a bad habbit.
Claire: *Shouting* Ian hunny Owen's just taken his first steps!
Ian: Oh my God that's great.
I quickly run into the living room to find Owen standing up holding onto Claire's leg. I smile at him and ask him to show Daddy his walking but Owen has different ideas and shows me a cheeky grin then hides his head against Claire's leg. Claire looks at me and smiles, I'm really disappointed because I wanted to be there when my son took his first steps and now I want him to show me he won't. Claire bends down next to Owen and whispers something in his ear, Owen then turns to face me before staring to walk towards me.
Owen: Dad, Dad!
I look of absolute disbelief appears on my face as I realise what Owen has just said, he just called me Dad for the first time. I thought he would never say it as he learnt to say Mum months ago. I feel tears running down my face, I don't like crying infront of people but this is just a perfect day in my life, absolutely perfect!
Claire: H hold your arms out!
Ian: Oh yeah sorry.
I hold my arms out and Owen walks into them, I'm so proud because he didn't even fall over when walking from one side of the room to the other. I give him a big cuddly and tell him I love him, I still have tears running down my cheeks and Owen is looking at me as if to say you big baby. Claire comes over and we all have one big happy family hug.
Ian: Why didn't you tell me he could say Dad?
Claire: I wanted it to be a surprise.
Ian: Well it definately is that. I'm so happy.
Claire: Awwww bless, Daddy's gone all soppy hasn't he.
Owen laughs and throws his arms around my neck, I kiss him and think about how much I love him, which is one hell of a lot. I love Claire as well and I'm so glad we're together, ok the way it happened wasn't perfect but now life is perfect and I wouldn't turn back time if I ever had the chance, obviously that's not likely to happen.
My parent's haven't been at all intrested in Owen since the time he was ill, that really upset me even though I didn't enjoy it when they came down. I'm hoping they remember his birthday otherwise they'll be in trouble. I suppose it doesn't help that Alyn's girlfriend has just had a baby girl, they care more about her than they do Owen not that Owen's bothered. I doubt he even remembers them. I want his birthday to be perfect but neither me nor Claire have any idea what we can do to make that happen.
Claire's seen Lee several times since the split and has even taken Owen to meet him. Owen absolutely loved spending time with Lee and I don't blame him because he's a great bloke. Claire enjoyed the time she spend with him too and I'm glad she's happy. We've even invited Lee round for dinner next week and he said he's definately going to come so I myself can't wait, neither can Claire and Owen is too young to understand what we're going on about.
I've just put Owen to bed and the cheeky little thing stuck his tongue out at me as I was saying goodnight to him. If we just leave him in his cot with a bottle of milk he'll drink it and then fall asleep without any hassle, he even sleeps all night through sometimes but that's only once in about every two months but I think he'll get better with time.
As I lay in bed tonight with Claire asleep in my arms I'm so happy, I really don't know what I would do without her. I know I'd miss her so much and its because of that, that I'm going to make sure I treat her perfectly and show her all the love I have for her. I'm hoping we can possibly start thinking about having another baby soon, I haven't mentioned it to Claire yet but I know its going to be hard when I finally do tell her. I really want a daughter, ever since Owen was born I've really wanted a little girl and I hope one day I will. Don't get me wrong I'm glad Claire had Owen and I love him so much it's unbelieveable how much love I feel for him but I did want a girl. That doesn't matter now though because I'm really happy with my son and Claire! I kiss Claire goodnight, turn on Owen's baby monitor and turn off the light before drifting off into a peaceful sleep
After what happened that day I was left hating Faye even more. Claire says I'm being stupid because we don't even know if they saw us but I'm positive they did. I know that I shouldn't let this bother me but it has and I don't have any idea why and I also don't know how to stop the pain I'm feeling. Claire's proved to be a great Mum and is always making sure that Owen is ok. We've moved house now and have painted the smallest room for Owen, it has lots of baby animals painted on it with a countryside background. It looks perfect just like my little boy. He knows who I am and loves to be held in my arms which is great and feels so right, I love him and Claire so much!
With Owen being one in a few weeks he's started trying to walk but hasn't had any luck at all, he keeps falling over but he doesn't hurt himself. He just starts laughing and gets straight back up to try again. Its so sweet. Owen loves the water and screams whenever you try to get him out of the bath but in the end he calms down and snuggles upto Claire and has his bottle of milk. Recently the little monkeys decided that he will wake up at about three in the morning and stay in our bed with us, which is ok I suppose but its a bad habbit.
Claire: *Shouting* Ian hunny Owen's just taken his first steps!
Ian: Oh my God that's great.
I quickly run into the living room to find Owen standing up holding onto Claire's leg. I smile at him and ask him to show Daddy his walking but Owen has different ideas and shows me a cheeky grin then hides his head against Claire's leg. Claire looks at me and smiles, I'm really disappointed because I wanted to be there when my son took his first steps and now I want him to show me he won't. Claire bends down next to Owen and whispers something in his ear, Owen then turns to face me before staring to walk towards me.
Owen: Dad, Dad!
I look of absolute disbelief appears on my face as I realise what Owen has just said, he just called me Dad for the first time. I thought he would never say it as he learnt to say Mum months ago. I feel tears running down my face, I don't like crying infront of people but this is just a perfect day in my life, absolutely perfect!
Claire: H hold your arms out!
Ian: Oh yeah sorry.
I hold my arms out and Owen walks into them, I'm so proud because he didn't even fall over when walking from one side of the room to the other. I give him a big cuddly and tell him I love him, I still have tears running down my cheeks and Owen is looking at me as if to say you big baby. Claire comes over and we all have one big happy family hug.
Ian: Why didn't you tell me he could say Dad?
Claire: I wanted it to be a surprise.
Ian: Well it definately is that. I'm so happy.
Claire: Awwww bless, Daddy's gone all soppy hasn't he.
Owen laughs and throws his arms around my neck, I kiss him and think about how much I love him, which is one hell of a lot. I love Claire as well and I'm so glad we're together, ok the way it happened wasn't perfect but now life is perfect and I wouldn't turn back time if I ever had the chance, obviously that's not likely to happen.
My parent's haven't been at all intrested in Owen since the time he was ill, that really upset me even though I didn't enjoy it when they came down. I'm hoping they remember his birthday otherwise they'll be in trouble. I suppose it doesn't help that Alyn's girlfriend has just had a baby girl, they care more about her than they do Owen not that Owen's bothered. I doubt he even remembers them. I want his birthday to be perfect but neither me nor Claire have any idea what we can do to make that happen.
Claire's seen Lee several times since the split and has even taken Owen to meet him. Owen absolutely loved spending time with Lee and I don't blame him because he's a great bloke. Claire enjoyed the time she spend with him too and I'm glad she's happy. We've even invited Lee round for dinner next week and he said he's definately going to come so I myself can't wait, neither can Claire and Owen is too young to understand what we're going on about.
I've just put Owen to bed and the cheeky little thing stuck his tongue out at me as I was saying goodnight to him. If we just leave him in his cot with a bottle of milk he'll drink it and then fall asleep without any hassle, he even sleeps all night through sometimes but that's only once in about every two months but I think he'll get better with time.
As I lay in bed tonight with Claire asleep in my arms I'm so happy, I really don't know what I would do without her. I know I'd miss her so much and its because of that, that I'm going to make sure I treat her perfectly and show her all the love I have for her. I'm hoping we can possibly start thinking about having another baby soon, I haven't mentioned it to Claire yet but I know its going to be hard when I finally do tell her. I really want a daughter, ever since Owen was born I've really wanted a little girl and I hope one day I will. Don't get me wrong I'm glad Claire had Owen and I love him so much it's unbelieveable how much love I feel for him but I did want a girl. That doesn't matter now though because I'm really happy with my son and Claire! I kiss Claire goodnight, turn on Owen's baby monitor and turn off the light before drifting off into a peaceful sleep