Title: Rambling and Bewildered (1/?)

Fandom: Lost and Delirious

Author: Chosentwo4381

Email: chosentwo4381@yahoo.com

Summary: After the movie, Mouse has to take care of Tori

Disclaimer: I don't own these characters; they belong in some measure to Susan Swann, and the rest to Léa Pool.

Author's Note: I'm not at all sure where this came from. It's not beta'd. This part is really short. I'm not sure how long this is going to be. It'll probably be Mouse/Tori eventually.

Mouse's POV

May 23

Leaving school for the summer holidays was almost worse than going there for the first time. Then I had no idea what to expect, now I have no idea what to do. Paulie is dead; and Tori? Well, Tori kind of just snapped after it happened. It made her sister realize exactly what she had done by walking into that room after she had been told not to. Because in that room, our personal idyll, as odd as things were, we were all safe, no matter what the real world was like things were okay.

            Mrs. Vaughn, knowing the truth of everything from the beginning, talked to Tori's parents, so here we are now, in a car with a hired driver, going out to a place in the country where hopefully, I can do for Tori what I couldn't do for Paulie. Save her, from herself. 

            When I first realized that they were lovers, it didn't bother me that much; at least they each knew that they had someone that loved them. But later, when things began to fall apart, and Tori asked me to help Paulie, I began to wonder if love was worth it at all. To let someone become your whole world and then, not to move, but to have someone push you, and to fall, just seems like courting disaster. But they are/were my friends, the first true ones I had ever had, so I'll do this to the best of my ability.

            Looking at Tori hurts these days. She stares straight ahead most of the time, and even if you are standing right there, she's not looking at you. It's like she's seeing beyond what's really there. Sometimes she talks, but not to me, or to anyone else for that matter, only to Paulie. She's still beautiful, but now in an ephemeral angelic way rather than the vibrant goddess aura she exuded before.

            I want to fix this, as much as I can at least. I can't bring Paulie back, but maybe Tori has a chance. Maybe we both do.