At Carl's house...
-Carl and Sheen are watching the Giggles the Clown show.
Carl: Don't you know Giggles is in jail?
Sheen: Yeah. Sideshow Barney is taking his place.
-Instead of Krusty, it shows Sideshow Barney. Sideshow Barney has orange, fuzzy hair, a head shaped like an oval, big brown shoes, he's a little fat, and a hula. And he's holding this "wind instrument" thing.
Sideshow Barney: My friends. For years, i've been silent. Safe in the crude glissandos of this primitive wind instrument. But now destiny has thrust me into the center ring. In the coming weeks, you will notice some rather sweeping changes in our show. Please do not be alarmed.
-Jimmy runs in.
Jimmy: Carl! Sheen! What are you doing?
Sheen: We're watching Sideshow Barney.
Carl: Yeah. He's funny.
Jimmy: You backstabbers, you traitors, you-
Sheen: Stop that!
Carl: Yeah. All the time we were staring at Giggles, we were staring at a crook!
-Jimmy turns off the TV.
Jimmy: Look, Carl. Look, Sheen. I know Giggles' innocent. Don't ask me why. It's just a feeling.
Sheen: Come on, Jimmy.
Jimmy: Come on, Carl and Sheen. I can prove Giggles' innocent. But i'll need your help.
Carl: You do? Why?
Jimmy: Come on, Carl. You know why.
Sheen: No, we don't. Why?
Jimmy: I'll never forgive you for making me say this...you're my friends.
Jimmy: So, you with me?
-Carl and Sheen put their hands in.
Carl+Sheen: Yeah!
-Jimmy, Carl and Sheen go to the supermarket. The clerk ducks down.
Clerk: OK, don't try anything funny. I'm armed to the teeth.
Sheen: Jimmy, look! On the microwave!
Jimmy: So? I don't have a pacemaker.
Carl: Come on, Jimmy! The tape showed that the robber was heating up a burrito!
Jimmy: So?
Sheen: Don't you remember the 'Get Well Card' we sent to Giggles? It was after his heart attack! WHEN HE HAD A PACEMAKER!
Jimmy: Yeah.
Carl: Wait a minute: Giggles can't read.
Jimmy: So the poor guy can't read. Can we just get off his back already?
Sheen: NO! DON'T YOU GET IT, JIMMY? HOW CAN GIGGLES HAVE BEEN READING A MAGAZINE WHEN HE CAN'T READ?
Clerk(yells): Hey! This is not a lending library! If you're not going to buy that thing, put it back or i'll sue you!
Carl: You know, Jim, i'm starting to believe you. Giggles was framed! Does he have any enemies?
Jimmy: I don't know, but there's 1 person that can help us: Giggles' best friend, Sideshow Barney.
Back with Sideshow Barney...
Sideshow Barney: A volley of musketry flamed, thundered, roared! A profound silence followed, broken only by approaching footsteps, of the third brigade.
-The kids laugh.
Sideshow Barney: That's our show for today.
-Sideshow Barney decides to sing a song as someone plays a piano.
Sideshow Barney: Every time we say goodbye, it makes me cry. Every time we say goodbye, I wonder why. Every time we say goodbye. Goodbye.