AN: This was challenge set by may extremely weird friend. "Make a fic
involving Harry Potter in his 5th year. Voldemort must appear in a tutu,
and there must be a Grilled Cheese Sandwich, my philosophy club sweatshirt,
and Crest Toothpaste. Ben Franklin must be quoted at least three times." So
off I go, look how I go.
"Beware of the young doctor and the old barber." said Hermionie putting some books in her bag. Harry and Ron both stared open mouthed at her. Harry finished packing up and went up to her.
"Herm, what was that? It sounded like you just said 'beware of the young doctor and the old barber' but you never say random things." Harry looked at her and then at Ron.
"That was extremely random. Are you feeling okay?" Ron asked. Hermionie looked at them both in shock and horror and clasped her hands over her mouth. She quickly pulled out some paper and a pen.
"Fuck that man! I hate him! Draco put a curse on me so I can only say Benjamin Franklin quotes." She wrote
"That is not good." Harry said "How are we ever going to pass potions now?" Hermionie looked at him angrily and stormed out. Ron looked after her and laughed.
"I'd hate to see her in an Oral Report, well, depends on what kind of report, and how oral." Harry raised his eyes. Ron took that as a good sign "I mean really think about her during sex shouting out 'Oh You may delay, but time will not.' In pure passion. Tehe"
Harry shook his head and walked out leaving Ron to run after him.
~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~
Far far away, Voldemort was plotting his rise to power. At the moment he was dancing to 'Anarchy in the UK' in a pink tutu. He was very much enjoying himself.
"Sir, um, if I may intrude, I um, have some, um, urgent news for you. Um, maybe I came at the wrong time" Wormtail looked at his master dancing and tried to get out but the door was sealed shut.
"Not a bad time at all. Now what do you have to tell me?" he glanced at Wormtail's face " I'm almost done, if you were wondering" The song ended and he looked at his servant. "Now what do you want to tell me?"
"We have successfully taken over the Crest Toothpaste plant."
Voldemort folded his hands and looked at him.
"Excellent. Perfect, now we can control the muggle world as well. Now all I need is control of is the Wonder Bread factory."
"yes my lord. We shall rule them all"
"MuahahahahMuahahahahhaMuahahahahahahMuahahahahahaha"
"Muehehehehehehehehehe"
"Muehehehe?"
"Yes, Muehehehehehe"
"Okay MueheheheheMuahahahahaMuehehehehe"
~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~
Poof Three random Girls appeared in the halls of Hogwarts. Megan, Jo, and Katie. Megan was wearing her Basketball sweatshirt, Jo her soccer sweatshirt, and Katie was wearing her philosophy club sweatshirt. They were all standing in front of an ominous looking door with skulls on it.
"Wow. Cool door" Jo walked up and inspected it "Lets see if we can impale Katie on one of the Spike's. Katie, impale yourself on a spike, I hear is comfortable" She looked over at Katie and Megan and smiled evilly.
"Jo, lets hold out on the death threats till we know where we are. Okay?" Katie walked over looked at the door and inspected it. It had large metal spikes coming off it and had skulls in black iron all around. It's center had a giant Hamster.
"Dude. I think we are at wizard school. Ya know, that one. With the dark lord and the scar?" Both Katie and Jo stared at Megan is utter confusion " That one. Come on, you know. Harry Potter"
Jo fainted
Katie screamed in horror.
Megan laughed.
"We need to figure out how to get out of here" she said.
"Get out? Why get out? I need to find my husband!!!!!" Jo opened the giant hamster door and there, on a table, was the grilled cheese sandwich of doom. They stared in awe. This was the key to all of life's secretes and it was theirs for the taking. The walked over and looked at it in awe.
* Poof*
"Never confuse motion with action." Said their science teacher Dr. Corse.
~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~
To make a long story short Harry and Ron went off and destroyed the grilled cheese sandwich of Doom, Katie Megan and Jo all failed science and Hermionie, to this day, still quotes Benjamin Franklin.
The End
AN: Hope you like my randomness. Please for the love of Frodo R&R.
"Beware of the young doctor and the old barber." said Hermionie putting some books in her bag. Harry and Ron both stared open mouthed at her. Harry finished packing up and went up to her.
"Herm, what was that? It sounded like you just said 'beware of the young doctor and the old barber' but you never say random things." Harry looked at her and then at Ron.
"That was extremely random. Are you feeling okay?" Ron asked. Hermionie looked at them both in shock and horror and clasped her hands over her mouth. She quickly pulled out some paper and a pen.
"Fuck that man! I hate him! Draco put a curse on me so I can only say Benjamin Franklin quotes." She wrote
"That is not good." Harry said "How are we ever going to pass potions now?" Hermionie looked at him angrily and stormed out. Ron looked after her and laughed.
"I'd hate to see her in an Oral Report, well, depends on what kind of report, and how oral." Harry raised his eyes. Ron took that as a good sign "I mean really think about her during sex shouting out 'Oh You may delay, but time will not.' In pure passion. Tehe"
Harry shook his head and walked out leaving Ron to run after him.
~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~
Far far away, Voldemort was plotting his rise to power. At the moment he was dancing to 'Anarchy in the UK' in a pink tutu. He was very much enjoying himself.
"Sir, um, if I may intrude, I um, have some, um, urgent news for you. Um, maybe I came at the wrong time" Wormtail looked at his master dancing and tried to get out but the door was sealed shut.
"Not a bad time at all. Now what do you have to tell me?" he glanced at Wormtail's face " I'm almost done, if you were wondering" The song ended and he looked at his servant. "Now what do you want to tell me?"
"We have successfully taken over the Crest Toothpaste plant."
Voldemort folded his hands and looked at him.
"Excellent. Perfect, now we can control the muggle world as well. Now all I need is control of is the Wonder Bread factory."
"yes my lord. We shall rule them all"
"MuahahahahMuahahahahhaMuahahahahahahMuahahahahahaha"
"Muehehehehehehehehehe"
"Muehehehe?"
"Yes, Muehehehehehe"
"Okay MueheheheheMuahahahahaMuehehehehe"
~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~
Poof Three random Girls appeared in the halls of Hogwarts. Megan, Jo, and Katie. Megan was wearing her Basketball sweatshirt, Jo her soccer sweatshirt, and Katie was wearing her philosophy club sweatshirt. They were all standing in front of an ominous looking door with skulls on it.
"Wow. Cool door" Jo walked up and inspected it "Lets see if we can impale Katie on one of the Spike's. Katie, impale yourself on a spike, I hear is comfortable" She looked over at Katie and Megan and smiled evilly.
"Jo, lets hold out on the death threats till we know where we are. Okay?" Katie walked over looked at the door and inspected it. It had large metal spikes coming off it and had skulls in black iron all around. It's center had a giant Hamster.
"Dude. I think we are at wizard school. Ya know, that one. With the dark lord and the scar?" Both Katie and Jo stared at Megan is utter confusion " That one. Come on, you know. Harry Potter"
Jo fainted
Katie screamed in horror.
Megan laughed.
"We need to figure out how to get out of here" she said.
"Get out? Why get out? I need to find my husband!!!!!" Jo opened the giant hamster door and there, on a table, was the grilled cheese sandwich of doom. They stared in awe. This was the key to all of life's secretes and it was theirs for the taking. The walked over and looked at it in awe.
* Poof*
"Never confuse motion with action." Said their science teacher Dr. Corse.
~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~*~~~
To make a long story short Harry and Ron went off and destroyed the grilled cheese sandwich of Doom, Katie Megan and Jo all failed science and Hermionie, to this day, still quotes Benjamin Franklin.
The End
AN: Hope you like my randomness. Please for the love of Frodo R&R.