Disclaimer: See chapter 1.
PART 4
Willow leaned against the wall outside the Magic Box for a few seconds before heading inside. Giles had called her, wanting more information about the Litchock demon for his records. After a lengthy hot shower in which she'd scrubbed every drop of dried blood off of her, she dressed and headed over to the shop. Her thoughts had been blessedly her own since waking up. No sign of Spike in her head. The bond was gone.
Blame was a living thing, and hers was crawling around inside of her, just beneath the surface, trying to find a way out. She couldn't let that happen. She would keep this to herself. Nobody need know that she'd had sex with Spike.
Taking one last deep breath, Willow checked the square of white gauze on her neck, made sure her collar covered it, and went inside, ready to face everyone. To her surprise, the shop was empty aside from Giles and a lone customer. Giles was behind the counter ringing up a sale. She went up to the counter with a smile, hoping Giles wouldn't choose this moment to be super observant.
"Hi, Giles. Where's everyone at?" She cast a look toward the training room. "Buffy back there?"
Giles looked up from the cash register with a smile. "Uh, no, she and Dawn went grocery shopping." He handed the customer a bag. "Thank you, come again." Giles went around the counter as the customer left. "Today is Anya's day off, and she and Xander are... actually, I don't know where they are. Um, the bond? Since Spike's not with you, I assume it's ended?"
"Yeah, early this morning sometime. So, what'd ya need?" She sat at the table and peered idly at a few of the books spread there. They looked pretty boring. Even for her.
"Information. I couldn't find out anything more about the Litchock, so, I thought maybe you could answer a few questions." He sat down in the chair next to her, pencil and pad ready. "What made you and Spike decide to go after the demon when it ran?"
"Um, I don't know about Spike, but I was doing a spell, and the demon ran before I could use it. You know how magic builds up and fills your entire being?" she asked excitedly.
Giles shook his head, frowning at the excitement on her face. "Not personally, no. I've read about it, and seen it. You need to be very careful, willow."
Willow waved her hand dismissively. "I know, I know. Anyway, I needed an outlet so I didn't end up killing Buffy or Xander accidentally. I figured I'd follow the demon, hit it with the magic and then Spike could kill the ugly thing."
Giles was scribbling away in his notepad, gesturing for her to continue.
"Spike found it first, and was just about to attack it when I found them. The demon saw me, and kind of looked at me and Spike and then it shot this black ball of magic. I tried to move out of the way, but... Spike apparently wanted to do his one heroic deed for the month that night, and shoved me the other way, and I ended up right back in the path of the magic."
"Do you think he did it purposely?" Giles asked, looking up.
Willow chuckled. "No. No, he was pushing me out of the way. My hero," she deadpanned.
"Wait a minute. A black ball? Buffy never mentioned a black light. She said it was red. This could change everything. I'll have to..." He started to get up, but Willow stopped him.
"Hold on. There was a red one too, but that was after the black one." She sighed, getting more comfortable. "See, the black one hit me in the stomach and went through Spike's hand, 'cause he was still touching me."
Giles paused in his writing. "Did the magic travel through you into Spike? Or simply hit him as well?"
"Traveled through me into Spike. Anyway, um, nothing happened. From the black ball, I mean. Then came the red one. It was huge, like three feet around, it lit up the whole area. The demon threw it at Spike, knocking him back. I went to check on Spike, and the magic went through me, same as the first one did through Spike. It hurt for a few seconds, then I blacked out."
Giles finished writing and looked up at her. "That's it?"
Willow nodded. "That's it," she confirmed.
"And the mid conversation the two of you were having when you woke up on my couch?"
She shrugged. "I woke up with a headache in some kind of... corridor, and ran into him. The bond was working, and then there was an exit. I went through it, pulling him with me, and that's when we woke up. End of story."
Giles set his pad and pencil down with a nod. "And after you left my apartment? What happened then? Did the bond grow stronger, weaker, remain the same?"
Willow thought about it for a minute. "Same, I think."
"And Spike behaved himself last night?" He chuckled at his own question. "As much as a soulless vampire who can't hurt anyone can behave."
Uh-oh. Lying time. "Yeah, just like that." Feeling a small tingling in her hand, she scratched at it. The tingling turned into a burning and she frowned down at her hand. It felt like it was on fire, and the burning was growing more and more intense. An equally painful jab shot briefly through her head, then faded away. "Giles? My hand... um, water, I need water. My hand's on fire. Giles!" She was screaming now, jumping up from her chair, and knocking it over.
Giles grabbed her hand and looked down at it. There was nothing there. It was the normal unblemished skin she always had on her hand. Giles shrugged helplessly. "Willow, I don't see anything." He pulled her into the bathroom beside the training room and shoved her hand under the faucet, turning on the cold water.
"Ow. It feels like it's on fire." Turning her hand around, she examined the tender skin. It felt hot, but was unmarred. "Feel that," she told him, holding up her hand.
Giles lightly touched the skin on the back of her hand and pulled back quickly, obviously not expecting to feel such heat pouring off of her. "Good Lord. Does it still hurt?"
Willow shook her head. "No, it's fading. Almost gone." She looked up at him, taking the towel he handed her. "What's going on?"
"I don't know. It must have something to do with the Litchock demon, or the magic it used. Or the bond. We should get hold of Spike and see if he's felt anything similar."
They left the bathroom, and nearly ran into Buffy. Buffy raised an eyebrow at the sight of them leaving the bathroom together. Her eyebrow raised even further when she saw Willow wiping her hand off with a towel.
"Um, what's going on?" she asked, looking a bit nauseated.
Giles sighed explosively. "Good God, Buffy, not what you're thinking." He walked away, muttering, "You've been hanging around Spike too much."
Willow waited until he was behind the counter before making a disgusted face. "Ew," she whispered. "He's my mentor, my father-figure, and not my anything else. You're really disgusting, you know that?"
"I know." Buffy nodded, laughing a little. "I disgusted even myself. I think Giles is right. I've been hanging around Spike too much." She frowned a little and shook her head. "I need to not do that, I think."
Willow kept her mouth shut on how much she'd been hanging around Spike lately, and sat down, randomly grabbing a book. "Gonna research with us?"
Buffy shook her head with a laugh. "Nope. I just stopped by to drop off the coffee Giles asked me to get. And I did. And so, I'm gone. Bye."
Giles waved absently, already absorbed in his books again. "Mm-hmm."
Buffy left, leaving Willow to her thoughts.
Foremost among them, was Spike. When she woke up that afternoon, he had been asleep beside her, and though she'd been surprised to find him there, she hadn't woken him up. Why had he climbed back into bed with her after she fell asleep? He'd already gotten... well, okay, he hadn't been there purposely for sex, but he'd gotten it anyway. And the bond was broken.
So why had he stayed?
And not just in her house, but her bed. That's when it hit her. Oh, my God, I not only slept with Spike, I had sex with Spike. Willingly. And she wasn't sorry about it either. She had expected to feel extreme guilt and shame, but she didn't.
Was Spike sorry?
She shook her head. It didn't matter. She wasn't sorry, and if he was... oh well.
Spike was a vampire. He hurt people for a living. It was his whole life. Killing, feeding, torturing, maiming, murdering. What was a little meaningless sex thrown in? Not much, to a vampire.
The burning sensation in her hand had dissipated, leaving only a slight tingling feeling. She stared down at it, wondering what had happened.
A sharp pain in her chest sent her to her feet, and she stared down at her white blouse, expecting to see blood seeping through, but there wasn't any.
What the heck was going on? First her hand caught on fire, without the actual catching on fire part, then her chest starts bleeding, only without the actual bleeding part. What was happening to her?
Sudden pain in her stomach forced her to her knees, and she collapsed to the floor, gasping for air. Tears slid down her cheeks, and a sob escaped her. She'd never felt pain like this. Never.
"Oh, God," she whispered, barely noticing Giles calling her name. She gasped desperately for air, but couldn't seem to find any. "I can't breathe." She gulped in huge amounts of air, but still felt like she was suffocating. And the pain. Oh, God, the pain was so immense that her vision was blacking out. Small dark circles flashed in front of her eyes.
Giles laid Willow on the floor and looked her over, expecting to see a wound of some kind, but he couldn't find anything. She was unconscious now, her breathing had returned to normal, and she seemed to be coming out of... whatever had happened to her.
She stirred slightly, drawing in a breath. Her eyes fluttered open. She grabbed her stomach and curled into a ball, rolling onto her side with a moan. "It hurts so much," she whispered.
Giles gently pried her hands away from her stomach and lifted her shirt. He sucked in a breath at the mottled bruising there. Her whole abdomen was covered in black, blue, green and yellow bruises. When he lightly pressed his fingers to the flesh, she screamed and shoved his hands away.
"Spike!" She sat up, knowing somehow that Spike was in trouble. A voice, something, was whispering in the back of her mind, telling her to get to him.
Giles tried to hold her down, but she shoved him away. "Willow, calm down. What is it? Spike--"
"Is hurt... at my house. That's where I left him." She was looking around her, wincing every time she moved. "Keys?" she asked, waiting for Giles to catch on. When he didn't, she grabbed his arm and started pulling him toward the front door of the shop. "Car keys. I need to get over there. Nobody knew he was there. Why would someone hurt him at my house?" Her eyes widened. "Buffy?"
Giles allowed her to pull him out of the shop, but made sure he stopped to lock the door before leaving. "How do you know Spike is hurt?" he asked, trying to calm her down as he hurried her to his car in front of the shop.
She shook her head, near tears again. "I just do. I think the bond is still working. I thought it ended, but now it's like..." she struggled for words. "I can't explain it. I just know that he's hurt, and there's so much pain," she whispered.
PART 4
Willow leaned against the wall outside the Magic Box for a few seconds before heading inside. Giles had called her, wanting more information about the Litchock demon for his records. After a lengthy hot shower in which she'd scrubbed every drop of dried blood off of her, she dressed and headed over to the shop. Her thoughts had been blessedly her own since waking up. No sign of Spike in her head. The bond was gone.
Blame was a living thing, and hers was crawling around inside of her, just beneath the surface, trying to find a way out. She couldn't let that happen. She would keep this to herself. Nobody need know that she'd had sex with Spike.
Taking one last deep breath, Willow checked the square of white gauze on her neck, made sure her collar covered it, and went inside, ready to face everyone. To her surprise, the shop was empty aside from Giles and a lone customer. Giles was behind the counter ringing up a sale. She went up to the counter with a smile, hoping Giles wouldn't choose this moment to be super observant.
"Hi, Giles. Where's everyone at?" She cast a look toward the training room. "Buffy back there?"
Giles looked up from the cash register with a smile. "Uh, no, she and Dawn went grocery shopping." He handed the customer a bag. "Thank you, come again." Giles went around the counter as the customer left. "Today is Anya's day off, and she and Xander are... actually, I don't know where they are. Um, the bond? Since Spike's not with you, I assume it's ended?"
"Yeah, early this morning sometime. So, what'd ya need?" She sat at the table and peered idly at a few of the books spread there. They looked pretty boring. Even for her.
"Information. I couldn't find out anything more about the Litchock, so, I thought maybe you could answer a few questions." He sat down in the chair next to her, pencil and pad ready. "What made you and Spike decide to go after the demon when it ran?"
"Um, I don't know about Spike, but I was doing a spell, and the demon ran before I could use it. You know how magic builds up and fills your entire being?" she asked excitedly.
Giles shook his head, frowning at the excitement on her face. "Not personally, no. I've read about it, and seen it. You need to be very careful, willow."
Willow waved her hand dismissively. "I know, I know. Anyway, I needed an outlet so I didn't end up killing Buffy or Xander accidentally. I figured I'd follow the demon, hit it with the magic and then Spike could kill the ugly thing."
Giles was scribbling away in his notepad, gesturing for her to continue.
"Spike found it first, and was just about to attack it when I found them. The demon saw me, and kind of looked at me and Spike and then it shot this black ball of magic. I tried to move out of the way, but... Spike apparently wanted to do his one heroic deed for the month that night, and shoved me the other way, and I ended up right back in the path of the magic."
"Do you think he did it purposely?" Giles asked, looking up.
Willow chuckled. "No. No, he was pushing me out of the way. My hero," she deadpanned.
"Wait a minute. A black ball? Buffy never mentioned a black light. She said it was red. This could change everything. I'll have to..." He started to get up, but Willow stopped him.
"Hold on. There was a red one too, but that was after the black one." She sighed, getting more comfortable. "See, the black one hit me in the stomach and went through Spike's hand, 'cause he was still touching me."
Giles paused in his writing. "Did the magic travel through you into Spike? Or simply hit him as well?"
"Traveled through me into Spike. Anyway, um, nothing happened. From the black ball, I mean. Then came the red one. It was huge, like three feet around, it lit up the whole area. The demon threw it at Spike, knocking him back. I went to check on Spike, and the magic went through me, same as the first one did through Spike. It hurt for a few seconds, then I blacked out."
Giles finished writing and looked up at her. "That's it?"
Willow nodded. "That's it," she confirmed.
"And the mid conversation the two of you were having when you woke up on my couch?"
She shrugged. "I woke up with a headache in some kind of... corridor, and ran into him. The bond was working, and then there was an exit. I went through it, pulling him with me, and that's when we woke up. End of story."
Giles set his pad and pencil down with a nod. "And after you left my apartment? What happened then? Did the bond grow stronger, weaker, remain the same?"
Willow thought about it for a minute. "Same, I think."
"And Spike behaved himself last night?" He chuckled at his own question. "As much as a soulless vampire who can't hurt anyone can behave."
Uh-oh. Lying time. "Yeah, just like that." Feeling a small tingling in her hand, she scratched at it. The tingling turned into a burning and she frowned down at her hand. It felt like it was on fire, and the burning was growing more and more intense. An equally painful jab shot briefly through her head, then faded away. "Giles? My hand... um, water, I need water. My hand's on fire. Giles!" She was screaming now, jumping up from her chair, and knocking it over.
Giles grabbed her hand and looked down at it. There was nothing there. It was the normal unblemished skin she always had on her hand. Giles shrugged helplessly. "Willow, I don't see anything." He pulled her into the bathroom beside the training room and shoved her hand under the faucet, turning on the cold water.
"Ow. It feels like it's on fire." Turning her hand around, she examined the tender skin. It felt hot, but was unmarred. "Feel that," she told him, holding up her hand.
Giles lightly touched the skin on the back of her hand and pulled back quickly, obviously not expecting to feel such heat pouring off of her. "Good Lord. Does it still hurt?"
Willow shook her head. "No, it's fading. Almost gone." She looked up at him, taking the towel he handed her. "What's going on?"
"I don't know. It must have something to do with the Litchock demon, or the magic it used. Or the bond. We should get hold of Spike and see if he's felt anything similar."
They left the bathroom, and nearly ran into Buffy. Buffy raised an eyebrow at the sight of them leaving the bathroom together. Her eyebrow raised even further when she saw Willow wiping her hand off with a towel.
"Um, what's going on?" she asked, looking a bit nauseated.
Giles sighed explosively. "Good God, Buffy, not what you're thinking." He walked away, muttering, "You've been hanging around Spike too much."
Willow waited until he was behind the counter before making a disgusted face. "Ew," she whispered. "He's my mentor, my father-figure, and not my anything else. You're really disgusting, you know that?"
"I know." Buffy nodded, laughing a little. "I disgusted even myself. I think Giles is right. I've been hanging around Spike too much." She frowned a little and shook her head. "I need to not do that, I think."
Willow kept her mouth shut on how much she'd been hanging around Spike lately, and sat down, randomly grabbing a book. "Gonna research with us?"
Buffy shook her head with a laugh. "Nope. I just stopped by to drop off the coffee Giles asked me to get. And I did. And so, I'm gone. Bye."
Giles waved absently, already absorbed in his books again. "Mm-hmm."
Buffy left, leaving Willow to her thoughts.
Foremost among them, was Spike. When she woke up that afternoon, he had been asleep beside her, and though she'd been surprised to find him there, she hadn't woken him up. Why had he climbed back into bed with her after she fell asleep? He'd already gotten... well, okay, he hadn't been there purposely for sex, but he'd gotten it anyway. And the bond was broken.
So why had he stayed?
And not just in her house, but her bed. That's when it hit her. Oh, my God, I not only slept with Spike, I had sex with Spike. Willingly. And she wasn't sorry about it either. She had expected to feel extreme guilt and shame, but she didn't.
Was Spike sorry?
She shook her head. It didn't matter. She wasn't sorry, and if he was... oh well.
Spike was a vampire. He hurt people for a living. It was his whole life. Killing, feeding, torturing, maiming, murdering. What was a little meaningless sex thrown in? Not much, to a vampire.
The burning sensation in her hand had dissipated, leaving only a slight tingling feeling. She stared down at it, wondering what had happened.
A sharp pain in her chest sent her to her feet, and she stared down at her white blouse, expecting to see blood seeping through, but there wasn't any.
What the heck was going on? First her hand caught on fire, without the actual catching on fire part, then her chest starts bleeding, only without the actual bleeding part. What was happening to her?
Sudden pain in her stomach forced her to her knees, and she collapsed to the floor, gasping for air. Tears slid down her cheeks, and a sob escaped her. She'd never felt pain like this. Never.
"Oh, God," she whispered, barely noticing Giles calling her name. She gasped desperately for air, but couldn't seem to find any. "I can't breathe." She gulped in huge amounts of air, but still felt like she was suffocating. And the pain. Oh, God, the pain was so immense that her vision was blacking out. Small dark circles flashed in front of her eyes.
Giles laid Willow on the floor and looked her over, expecting to see a wound of some kind, but he couldn't find anything. She was unconscious now, her breathing had returned to normal, and she seemed to be coming out of... whatever had happened to her.
She stirred slightly, drawing in a breath. Her eyes fluttered open. She grabbed her stomach and curled into a ball, rolling onto her side with a moan. "It hurts so much," she whispered.
Giles gently pried her hands away from her stomach and lifted her shirt. He sucked in a breath at the mottled bruising there. Her whole abdomen was covered in black, blue, green and yellow bruises. When he lightly pressed his fingers to the flesh, she screamed and shoved his hands away.
"Spike!" She sat up, knowing somehow that Spike was in trouble. A voice, something, was whispering in the back of her mind, telling her to get to him.
Giles tried to hold her down, but she shoved him away. "Willow, calm down. What is it? Spike--"
"Is hurt... at my house. That's where I left him." She was looking around her, wincing every time she moved. "Keys?" she asked, waiting for Giles to catch on. When he didn't, she grabbed his arm and started pulling him toward the front door of the shop. "Car keys. I need to get over there. Nobody knew he was there. Why would someone hurt him at my house?" Her eyes widened. "Buffy?"
Giles allowed her to pull him out of the shop, but made sure he stopped to lock the door before leaving. "How do you know Spike is hurt?" he asked, trying to calm her down as he hurried her to his car in front of the shop.
She shook her head, near tears again. "I just do. I think the bond is still working. I thought it ended, but now it's like..." she struggled for words. "I can't explain it. I just know that he's hurt, and there's so much pain," she whispered.