A/N: 15 minutes to write a chapter. Let's see me do it.
"Why would we even *want* to leave?" I asked, astonished that Tim would even suggest it. "This is Middle Earth. Elves, Hobbits... "
"Sex," threw in Jessica, shrugging.
"We *have* to leave," replied Tim, glaring and crossing his arms. "I mean.. we could alter their entire reality."
There was a pause, and Jessica and I shared a look. And we started laughing.
"And get laid!" I said with a giggle. Tim, meanwhile, rolled his eyes.
"Women."
~*~
After a lot of disagreement, and Jessica kicking Tim in the balls a few times, we finally decided that it would be best to go home. Now, the only question was, how?
I stood, eyes closed, hands on my head. Behind me, Jessica chanted, "Wait for it... wait for it.. waiiit.. for it..."
"Does that really help her think?" asked Tim, blinking and looking all together astounded at the idiocy in front of him.
"Well.. yeah," said Jessica, and she continued her chant, monk-like.
"I've got it!" I shouted suddenly, and Jessica blinked. Tim jumped, and there was a clatter of metal as every male in Isengard drew his sword, axe, bow, or whatever weapon he had at my sudden outburst.
"..heh.." I said quietly, shifting uncomfortably, and then I turned to Jessica. "All we have to do is click our shoes together three times and say 'There's no place like-'"
I was cut off by Jessica slapping me in the back of the head and Tim groaning, face-faulting, and falling backwards down the stairs of the tower, stunned with my stupid suggestion.
~*~
"Okay, so you're sure this'll work?" I asked Gandalf, eyeing him suspiciously. All of this waving-of-the-staff business sounded a bit fishy to me.
"Certainly, certainly," he muttered, shaking his head. "Anything to get you out of our way."
"I am offended!" said Tim loudly, and Jessica and I giggled.
"Yeah, seriously rude Wizard," Jessica mumbled.
"Oh, come along. Are you ready to depart?"
I nodded, and Jessica was about to nod, when she saw, out of the corner of her eye, a certain blonde girly elf. She held up her finger, and grinned to me.
"Just.. twenty minutes. That's all I need." And she dashed off, grabbing Legolas' hand and pulling him behind the tower.
~*~
"What is she doing?" asked Pippin, blinking as various sex-sounds emerged from behind the tower, where Legolas and Jessica were... doing... god-knows what.
I grinned, looking to Tim and sticking my tongue out, flicking him the middle finger, and then smiled sweetly down to Pip.
"Would you like to find out?"
~*~
A/N: And I have to leave it here.. just one more chapter left, and then it'll be over.
"Why would we even *want* to leave?" I asked, astonished that Tim would even suggest it. "This is Middle Earth. Elves, Hobbits... "
"Sex," threw in Jessica, shrugging.
"We *have* to leave," replied Tim, glaring and crossing his arms. "I mean.. we could alter their entire reality."
There was a pause, and Jessica and I shared a look. And we started laughing.
"And get laid!" I said with a giggle. Tim, meanwhile, rolled his eyes.
"Women."
~*~
After a lot of disagreement, and Jessica kicking Tim in the balls a few times, we finally decided that it would be best to go home. Now, the only question was, how?
I stood, eyes closed, hands on my head. Behind me, Jessica chanted, "Wait for it... wait for it.. waiiit.. for it..."
"Does that really help her think?" asked Tim, blinking and looking all together astounded at the idiocy in front of him.
"Well.. yeah," said Jessica, and she continued her chant, monk-like.
"I've got it!" I shouted suddenly, and Jessica blinked. Tim jumped, and there was a clatter of metal as every male in Isengard drew his sword, axe, bow, or whatever weapon he had at my sudden outburst.
"..heh.." I said quietly, shifting uncomfortably, and then I turned to Jessica. "All we have to do is click our shoes together three times and say 'There's no place like-'"
I was cut off by Jessica slapping me in the back of the head and Tim groaning, face-faulting, and falling backwards down the stairs of the tower, stunned with my stupid suggestion.
~*~
"Okay, so you're sure this'll work?" I asked Gandalf, eyeing him suspiciously. All of this waving-of-the-staff business sounded a bit fishy to me.
"Certainly, certainly," he muttered, shaking his head. "Anything to get you out of our way."
"I am offended!" said Tim loudly, and Jessica and I giggled.
"Yeah, seriously rude Wizard," Jessica mumbled.
"Oh, come along. Are you ready to depart?"
I nodded, and Jessica was about to nod, when she saw, out of the corner of her eye, a certain blonde girly elf. She held up her finger, and grinned to me.
"Just.. twenty minutes. That's all I need." And she dashed off, grabbing Legolas' hand and pulling him behind the tower.
~*~
"What is she doing?" asked Pippin, blinking as various sex-sounds emerged from behind the tower, where Legolas and Jessica were... doing... god-knows what.
I grinned, looking to Tim and sticking my tongue out, flicking him the middle finger, and then smiled sweetly down to Pip.
"Would you like to find out?"
~*~
A/N: And I have to leave it here.. just one more chapter left, and then it'll be over.