Playing With Matches

By: Jessica R Vance

Rating: Ah, what the heck. G.

Summary: When young Bombalurina tries to play matchmaker for Demeter, Murphy's law (everything that can go wrong will) is proven true.

---

Munkustrap and Demeter passed each other, and smiled. They whispered shy hellos and hurried away, their blushes invisible to each other.

Bombalurina was tired of this.

It was becoming increasingly obvious that her sister and Deuteronomy's oldest son had feelings for each other. But Demeter, being the shy little queen she was, would never admit it. And Munkustrap, being the awkward youngster he was, was in no position to do any pouring out of his heart.

Bomba sighed. Then she felt a pair of hands creep around her waist. "Hey there," a silky-smooth voice whispered. Bomba shivered, purred, and turned to face her assailant.

"Tugger," she grinned, "How are you today?"

"Just fine, sweet lips," came the rehearsed reply, "And you?"

"Just... thinking," she answered.

Tugger purred. "Ooo... what about?" he asked slyly, winking. Bomba rolled her eyes.

"Not the same thing *you're* thinking about, I'm sure," she muttered, suddenly annoyed by her courter. She detached herself from him. "I was thinking of Demi and Munku."

"Demi doesn't like me..." Tugger reflected, quite pointlessly. Bomba sighed, but continued.

"Surely you've noticed something... between them, haven't you?"

"Yeah, a wall," Tugger joked, chuckling. Demeter and Munkustrap's human's flats were next door to each other. This remark earned him a cuff from the object of his affection. "Ouch! What was that for?"

"Can you be serious for a minute? I'm worried about them," Bomba said, glancing over at Demeter, who was lying forlornly in her pipe. Tugger followed her gaze.

"Bah," he said, waving a hand dismissively, "They'll be fine. One of them just needs to get over their shyness." He grinned. "A problem Demeter's sister never had."

"Neither did Munkustrap's brother," Bomba purred in response, twisting Tugger's young mane around her finger. Still concerned about her sister, she sighed. "I just hope one of them says something soon. I can tell it bothers her..."

"Maybe you should do something to speed up the confession process," Tugger offered, tracing circles on her back distractedly. Though Bomba knew he wasn't really concentrating on the problem at hand, she also knew he may have a point.

"Hm..." she murmured to herself. A plan was forming...

---

This... was going to be tough. Bomba looked at herself in the mirror. She was beautiful. She was confident. She could handle this.

... Couldn't she?

There were two nagging facts that kept pushing their way into her mind: The tom she was about to ask to the Jellicle Ball was...

1. Her sister's object of affection.
2. The brother of her own object of affection.

Munkustrap would say yes. Wouldn't he? Surely he wasn't planning on asking Demeter - he was much too shy for that. All Bomba needed to do was convince him to go with her, then pair him up with Demi once they got there. That shouldn't be too hard, should it? Provided that the two managed to tell each other how they really felt during the course of the ball.

... She wasn't as sure as she had been before. But, it was worth a shot. She groomed herself a bit more and prepared to leave. "Where are you going, looking so gorgeous?" She froze. Tugger! Now what? She turned slowly and gave the leopard tom her most ravishing smile.

"Uh... I was just... going to find you!" she exclaimed, then mentally slapped herself. 'Way to get out of a jam, Bomba,' she chided herself.

Tugger grinned smoothly. "*Really,*" he said, oozing charm, "Well, here I am." He strutted up to her and wrapped his arms around her. "Anything *special* you wanted to tell me?"

Bomba's head was swimming. "Um... no, not really! Just... uh, have a nice day!" She hurriedly pried herself away and dashed off. "I really need to be going!"

A very confused and frustrated Tugger stood in her dust.

---

Bomba dashed behind the oven and caught her breath. "Great," she muttered to herself, "Now Tugger's going to think I don't like him!" She sighed. "Oh well... I can get things back on track with him once I finish up with the unrequited lovebirds." She straightened her fur and prepared herself to be ravishing. Then she headed off to find Munkustrap.

---

It didn't take long. "Hey, Bom," he greeted her. "How've you been?"

"Just fine," Bomba purred, going right up to him. He blushed a little. "How are *you*?" she asked, tracing random patterns on his chest.

"Um... uh... I'm good," he stuttered, "Uh... you okay, Bom?" Bomba giggled.

"Sure I'm okay. In fact, I'm better than I've been in a long time." Munkustrap gulped.

"Oh really?"

"Mm-hmm... say Munk..."

Munku cleared his throat loudly. "Y-yeah?"

"Have you ever... given any thought to picking out a mate?" Munkustrap's eyes widened. Bomba suppressed a laugh.

"M...mate?" Munku repeated, his voice cracking. Bomba nodded. "I... I don't need a mate just yet. Besides, the ball's a whole... uh..." he sighed, "A whole 3 days away. I've got plenty of time to pick someone out and... you know, try to win them over."

"Oh... what if you didn't need to win them over?" Bomba suggested, tracing his jaw with her finger. Munku raised an eyebrow. "What if there was someone who's already crazy about you?"

"Uh... like who?"

Bomba giggled again. "Like me, silly!" Munkustrap blushed bright crimson.

"But... I thought... you know... you and Tugger..."

"Tugger?" Bomba laughed. "Oh come on. Surely you don't think a lady like me would actually be interested in *him.* An overbearing, stuck-up swaggart like him isn't for me. I want a real tom... someone mature... someone like *you,* Munku..." Her mouth was dangerously close to his. He coughed.

"Uh... yes, well... um... I'm flattered, Bom, really, but..." Bomba turned on her nearly-patented pout.

"What? You don't like me, Munku?" she asked sadly, sticking out her lower lip. Munkustrap scratched the back of his head nervously.

"No, no, that's not it, but... well..." Bomba grinned inwardly. Of course he didn't like her! 'Let's see how he gets out of this one...' she thought. She turned away from him, crossing her arms across her chest.

"I see how it is. A girl flings herself at you and you turn her away. It's not as though you're seeing anyone." Munkustrap's eyes flitted back and forth nervously. "Is it?" she asked.

"Well... no. No, I'm not seeing anyone." Then he muttered something that sounded to Bomba like, "And I don't suppose I ever will..."

"What was that?" she asked, twisting her arms around his neck.

"Nothing." He sighed.

"Aw... poor sweet baby..." Bomba cooed, resting her head on his shoulder. "Hey... I've got a great idea... why don't you and I go to the ball together?"

"You're not going with Tugger?"

Bomba frowned. "What did I just tell you? Of course I'm not going with him... I want to go with *you.*"

Munkustrap finally gave in. "Oh, okay. It's not like I have a date anyway." He grinned nervously at her.

She rested her head on his chest and smirked evilly. "That's the spirit."

---

As Bombalurina made her triumphant return to her den, she sensed that she was being followed. She turned swiftly to see Tugger, who wasn't making any attempt to hide the hurt in his eyes. "Hi," she said awkwardly. What was wrong with him?

"So," he said, his voice full of pain and anger, "I'm an overbearing, stuck-up swaggart, am I!?" Bomba gasped. He had heard? "When were you going to tell me, Bom? When? At the ball? Were you going to humiliate me in front of everyone? Were you going to wait until I asked you to the ball, then turn me down in favor of my own brother? Was that your plan?"

"Tugger, no..." Bomba began, but he held out a hand to stop her.

"I can't believe you fed me those lines about Demi and Munku. You're not worried about them at all! You wanted Munku to yourself the whole time! I just can't believe you'd stoop this low to get a guy, Bom."

Bomba's eyes filled with tears. "Tugger, please, I didn't mean..." But he was already walking away. "Tugger, let me explain!" He turned, and hope swelled inside her.

But all he said was, "Have fun at the ball, Bom." And then he was gone.

---

After the initial heart-wrenching sobbing, Bomba sat brooding in her den. "How could I have been so stupid?" she muttered, "I should have made absolutely sure that we were alone!" She buried her face in her arms. In an attempt to make her sister happy, she had ruined her own life. "Now he hates me," she whispered to herself.

"Bom? You okay?" Bom's head shot up to see Demeter entering their den. "Have you been crying?"

Bomba wiped her eyes hastily. "I... uh... I have allergies." She sniffed for emphasis.

"You don't have allergies, Bom," Demi answered, frowning. She sat next to her sister. "What happened?"

"Um... Tugger and I sort of... broke up," Bom confessed.

She glanced sidelong at her sister, waiting for her response. Demeter huffed. "Good," she said resolutely, "He wasn't good for you, Bom. You can do much better than him." She grinned. "You'd better hurry though - the ball's only three days away."

Bomba looked sheepish. "Well... I sort of already have a new date." Demi didn't look surprised.

"Figures. Who is it?"

'Here we go,' Bom though. "It's... Munkstrap," she said. Demeter noticably tensed, her brow furrowed.

"Munkustrap?" Her voice was barely a breath. Bom nodded. Demi's mouth formed an "Oh," but no sound came out. At that point, she must have realized that she was giving herself away, because she shook her head. "Uh... don't you think that'll be a bit awkward? Him being Tugger's brother and all?"

The sadness in her eyes was almost more than Bom could bear. She shrugged. "I don't think so. I don't even know if Tugger's still going." Demi nodded. "Dem? You okay?"

"Yeah." She cleared her throat. "I... I hope you have a good time, Bom."

'Why does everyone keep saying that!?' Bom asked herself. "Aren't you going?" she said.

"No, I don't think so..." Demi answered. "I wouldn't have anyone to go with. All the good toms are taken already..." She sighed. Bom wrapped an arm around her slight shoulders.

"It'll be okay, Dem... you don't *have* to havea date to go." Demeter looked close to tears. "Dem?"

"I need to go," the golden queen blurted, trembling. She broke away from her sister and ran off.

Bomba sighed and sank to the ground, feeling miserable. Why was this getting so out of hand?

---

The next day, Bomba paced near the pipe. It was only two days until the ball, and everything was going wrong. Tugger was still angry, Demeter was heartbroken, and Munkustrap was clueless.

She heard footsteps. She turned slowly. Tugger walked toward her, head held high, looking straight past her. "Hi," she said quietly. Tugger turned to look at her.

"Bom," he said, nodding formally. "Have you seen Demeter?"

Bom raised her eyebrows. "Not sure where she's gone off too," she answered, "Why?"

"Well," Tugger said haugtily, "I was just going to ask her to the ball." With that, he strutted away.

Bomba nearly laughed out loud. Oh, that was too perfect! If Tugger could get Demi to go with him, they could just switch dates and everything would be okay! Not that it would work that way... Bomba knew full well what Demeter's answer would be...

---

"No."

Tugger stared blankly at her. "No? What do you mean, no?"

Demeter glared at him. "No. As in negative? Opposite of yes? I think not?"

"But... but why not?" Tugger sputtered. All the good queens were taken - what would he do if Demeter wouldn't go with him?

"Because... you're not my type, Tugger. You never have been, you never will be." She turned away from him.

"I see. You're one of those girls that prefers silver." His words struck a nerve.

"Yes, well... Apparently Bom is, too," she muttered, curling up into a ball.

"So I hear," Tugger growled. "This sort of stuff keeps up, I'll have no fan club left." He sat next to her. "That's why I was thinking you and I could go, Dem. Maybe Bom and Munku will see us together and... well, maybe they'll both realize the good time they're missing." he grinning winningly at her.

She mused. Demeter had never thought of herself as a "good time." Maybe (for once), Tugger was right. She smiled back at him. "You've got yourself a deal, kit," she said. They shook hands on it.

---

The ball was only one day away. Everyone was hard at work rehearsing their dances. Old Didrika would soon ascend to the Heaviside Layer, leaving Deuteronomy with the responsibility of Jellicle leader. And that would only mean one thing: that Munkustrap would be the tribe's new protector.

The young tabby was terrified.

"What if I'm no good, Tugger?" he asked his younger brother, frightened. Tugger, still a bit irked at him, shrugged. "Do you think I'll be okay?"

The maned tom huffed apathetically. "I dunno," he fumed.

"You okay?"Munku asked. Tugger said nothing. "Is this about Bomba?" Munku asked cautiously.

"Now that you mention it," Tugger answered, "it is. What were you thinking, Munku? You knew that I... well... you know... about me and Bom."

"I knew," Munku said. "That's why I asked her about you. She... well, she called you names." He looked at Tugger innocently. "I just figured you had done something to make her mad."

"So it's always my fault," Tugger sighed.

"To tell you the truth, I'm really only going to the ball to see Demeter." Tugger got an odd look on his handsome face. "Does that make you mad?"

Tugger suddenly grinned. "No... actually that makes me feel a lot better." He slapped him on the back. "Well, good luck with Demi!" With that, he strode away laughing.

---

Nerves were wracked. The ball was that night. It was nearly dusk.

"I'm glad you're going, Dem," Bomba said, as the girls primped and preened in front of Bomba's mirror. "You'll have a good time, I think," she added. 'Especially once I pair you off with the right date,' she mused, smiling.

"I think so too," Demi answered, "By the way, did I tell you I found a date?"

Bom froze. A date? What about Munku? "Oh really?" she asked nonchalantly.

"Yeah," Demi answered, "I hope you won't mind... Tugger asked me."

Bomba nearly fainted. "Tugger?" she squeaked. She composed herself. "But I thought you didn't like him," she remarked.

"Oh, I don't know," Demi mused, "He may not be so bad." She glanced at her sister to check her emotions. "He's quite good looking, you know."

"I noticed," Bomba said bitterly. She glanced outside. "Sun's going down. Time to go!"

---

"Jellicle cats, come out tonight! Jellicle cats, come one, come all!"

Things had gone well so far. Old Didrika had shown up with his usual extravagance, and it was time for the big group dance.

Demeter, Bombalurina, Tugger, and Munkustrap were miserable.

'He's so full of himself.'

'He's so *boring.*'

'She's no fun at all.'

'She needs to calm down.'

As the cats jumped and twirled the junkyard, the two pairs gazed at each other. "They don't look like they're having a very good time," Demeter observed. Tugger nodded.

"Are you?" he asked, pointe blank. Demi looked sheepish and Tugger grinned. "That's okay. I'm not too excited either." He took her hand. "Now let's go see if we can get the right pairs matched up."

---

"This is ridiculous," Bomba sighed, "You don't want to be here with me." Munku looked at her. "Honestly. If you could have your pick of queens to be with tonight, who would you pick?" Munku hesitated. "Don't worry, you won't hurt my feelings."

Munku scanned the crowd, his eyes landing wordlessly on Demeter.

"I thought as much," Bomba said, nodding.

"Sorry, Bom..." Munku began, but she put a finger to his lips.

"I've got a news flash for you, kit," she whispered, "I'd rather be with her date." Munku looked confused. "I know I said I didn't like him. I lied. Tell me something: would you be here tonight if I hadn't asked you?"

Munku considered, then shook his head, embarrassed. "I knew it. Look, I know everyone's probably mad at me. I'm going to come clean." She sighed. "The only reason I invited you to the ball was to get you and Demi together."

Silence. Then, "So... you really *don't* like me...?"

Bomba chuckled. "No."

This caused Munku to sigh in relief. "Thank the Everlasting Cat," he said. "I would have hated to tell you I really liked your sister." Bom laughed.

"It's not like it wasn't obvious..." she said, smiling. Munku blushed.

"Having fun, kits?" came a smug voice. Tugger and Demeter approached, both smiling. Bomba noticed that Munkustrap's eyes immediately went to Demi. "Hey, Munk."

Munku grinned. "Tug," he said, nodding.

"Look," Bom said, "I think everyone here knows they're with the wrong date," Bom said, "So, why don't we just switch?" Tugger looked at her incredulously. She winked at him.

"That's a good idea," Munku murmured. He offered Demeter his hand and she accepted it hastily. As they swept out onto the dance floor, Tugger and Bomba watched them happily.

After a few minutes, Bomba glanced at Tugger. "Um... listen," she began, "I'm sorry about what I said. I tried to explain it to you..."

"I know," Tugger interrupted, "I should have listened." He smiled. "So this whole time... this whole fiasco... you were just trying to pair them up?" Bom nodded. "You crazy little minx," he chuckled.

"Do you forgive me?" Bomba replied.

Tugger put on a mock-serious tone and glared at her. "Well..." he said, doing his best to sound reproachful, "I suppose I can let it slide this time." He encircled her waist with his arms and pulled her close. "Just don't let it happen again."

Bom smiled seductively. "Yes sir," she murmured just before their lips met.

They pulled away and out of the corner of her eye, Bomba caught Munku and Demi, engaged in conversation. Demeter blushed, and suddenly she was swept into her silver knight's arms for a kiss. Bomba smiled.

*Finally*... things were going right.

~Fin~

Okay... so it was cheesy. Big deal. I felt fluffy. /