Disclaimer : Not miiiiineee
Hey ya'll! Do you even remember this story? Hehe. Anyways, the author that took over this story for the past four chapters isn't going to be finishing the story and since I *hate* leaving my stories unfinished, I decided to pick it up again. If you haven't read her portion of the story, you can find it at http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=878047 . Make sure you read them before you read this part.. Now I know I've been really bad with the updating of my stories lately, but I promise that they all will be updated within the next two weeks (well, the chapters will be written. Posting depends on when I get them back from my betas).. And hmm.. yeah, I think thats about it. Remember to read - and review. Its the nice thing to do.
Don't Say You Love Me
Chapter 24
but how do I let go when I've, loved him for so long and I've, givin him all that I could
maybe love is a hopeless crime, giving up what seems your lifetime
what went wrong with something once so good
Rory stared absentmindedly out the window of the plane, watching the landscape below quickly fade away as they ascended into the air. Down below her, was everything she had ever known. Her entire world. Her mother, Luke, her grandparents, Lane, Jess... Tristan. And she was leaving them, jetting off to New York, where she would learn the ropes, be prepared for whatever she would meet once she left the States, traveling into far distances, so unknown, so scary. For the millionth time since she had walked out of her and Tristan's townhome that fateful day, she felt regret and resistance forcing its way into her heart and her mind. Shaking her head, she shoved her hands in her coat pocket, determined not to think about those things. This is what she had wanted for as long as she could remember. She was an adult, she'd get used to not having her friends and family there whenever she needed them.
Suddenly something cool came into contact with her hand, deep within the depth of the blue jean jacket she wore. Confused, she hooked her finger around it and pulled it out, sucking in her breath when she did. There, dangling from her forefinger, was the golden charm bracelet Tristan had given to her for their six month anniversary, shortly before they moved in together. She gently cradled it in her hand, her eyes filling with tears as it twinkled in the sunlight, filtering in through the window beside her. Touching it softly, she let her fingers run over the surface of the charms that hung from the chain, pushing memories to the forefront of her mind. Almost as if in some unbearable pain, she squeezed her fist closed over it, closing her eyes tightly, willing the tears to go away. After a few moments, she reopened them, her blue eyes still wet, but no tears came forth. Swallowing the lump in her throat, she shoved the bracelet back into her pocket and went back to looking out the window.
*****
Mumbling to himself, Tristan rolled over in his bed, letting out a tortured sigh as he caught the time on the bedside clock. Closing his eyes was futile, as they flew right back open two minutes later when the intrusive object began its shrill wake up call. Something about that clock just reminded him all to much of military school. Slamming a hand down on it to shut it off, he groaned and pushed himself out of bed. Blindly, he stumbled towards the door and across the hall to the bathroom, stopping as he realized his mistake.
There, before him, was the unfinished project Rory had insisted they do together. It had been a long two weeks when she had announced they didn't spend nearly enough time together, with work and prior commitments, so in an attempt to bring their lives back in sync with one another and finish a project they'd put off for far too long, she decided they were going to remodel the bathroom together. They had been nearly finished when the call had came, and he stared now, at the half-finished tiled floor, the two walls that were painted a pastel blue, while the others were still covered in the gaudiest green color the previous owners had used. There were still cans of paint sitting in the bathtub, along with paint brushes and the remaining boxes of tiles for the floor. Sitting on the edge of the sink was a forgotten scrunchie of Rory's, a white one, decorated with rainbows, which he had teased her endlessly about. Stepping slowly into the room, he picked up the scrunchie, wrapping his fingers tightly around it, biting his lower lip as he tried to hold onto his feelings.
A hollow sound escaped his throat as he dropped it to the floor and stormed out of the room and back towards his bed.
******
"I'll go talk to him," Jess interrupted, as Lorelai and Luke continued to bicker, in their usual positions, one behind the counter, the other sitting in front of it.
The three had been discussing the current situation between two people they all cared deeply about. Both Lorelai and Jess had spoken to Rory earlier that day, and both had come to the conclusion she was miserable. Summer had also phoned earlier, saying she had spoken to Tristan and he was just as bad, if not worse.
"No, I'll talk to him," Lorelai protested after taking a long swig of the coffee that sat in front of her. "There's something I need to ask him anyway."
Luke rolled his eyes. "Let Jess talk to him, Lorelai. They're friends, it'll be a lot less awkward for him."
Lorelai frowned at him. "I'm his friend. We're friendly-ish. Friendish."
"I'll talk to him," Jess restated before grabbing his coat and heading out the door. Lorelai glared at his back, sighing as the bell above the door tinkled as he departed.
******
"Dammit," Tristan grumbled under his breath, tossing the pen down on the desk. He had been sitting here for the past three hours, vainly attempting to get some sort of work done. Instead, his eyes kept wandering back to the picture frame that held his all time favorite photo of Rory, which now lay face down on his desk. This was impossible, he wasn't going to get any work done like this. Standing, he stretched and headed into the living room. Grabbing the phone, he quickly ordered some chinese and sat down on the couch, flipping on the television. After a few minutes of channel surfing, the doorbell rang, saving him from his thoughts. Turning the TV off, he made his way to the door, letting out a sigh of relief when he saw Jess on the other side.
"Mariano."
"DuGrey," Jess replied, the same sarcastic tone. The two shook their heads, one of dark locks, the other of blonde tufts and Tristan stepped aside to let his friend in.
Jess shrugged off his jacket, tossing it carelessly over a chair and turned towards Tristan. "How you holding up?"
Tristan rolled his eyes. Jess was nothing, if not blunt. "I'm fine."
"Mmhmm," Jess murmured, raising one eyebrow, clearly stating his disbelief.
"I am."
"Okay."
"Never better."
"Great."
"A jig is forthcoming."
At that, Jess shook his head. "DuGrey, DuGrey.. I know you better then that. Lie to yourself all you want, but I'm not falling for it."
"I..I've been better, okay? Today just has been a bad day and I don't feel like talking about it."
"Okay."
"Okay."
Silence followed as the two sat down on opposite ends of the couch, both staring into oblivion, and both minds dancing around the same subject.
Hesitantly, Tristan cleared his throat. "Have you umm.. have you talked to her?"
Jess gave a positive bob of his head before glancing up at him. "She called this morning."
"How is she?"
"She's okay. She misses you."
"Really? She said that?"
"Oh, yeah. First thing out of her mouth." That was a slight embellishment on his part, seeing as it had been an hour into their conversation that she had even brought him up, quite reluctantly at that, only to ask how he was doing. But he knew Rory, and could tell just from the tone of her voice that she missed him terribly.
Tristan's usually bright blue eyes darkened slightly at that and he slouched down on the couch in thought. "Hmm.."
"Tristan, man, why don't you just call her? She misses you and you obviously miss her. I know you're big on that whole pride thing, but dammit, you love each other. Are you really that willing to lose her over something so.. not worth it?"
"I can't," Tristan said, his eyes on the floor. "She made the choice. It's up to her if she wants there to be an us. I'm not going to stop her from living out her dreams because I have some selfish need to keep her with me forever. I love her too much to do that."
Jess sighed and shook his head. "I hope you know what you're doing.."
******
"Where are we going?" Rory giggled as Tristan pulled the car they were seated in, out of his garage and onto the street.
Tristan glanced over at her and grinned. "You'll see."
"Aw, c'mon. You know I hate surprises," Rory whined, giving him her best puppy eyes and a pout upon her lips.
Chuckling, he shook his head. "I think you'll like this one."
"Triiistaaaaaaannn, pleeeeeeeeeassssseeee."
"Shh," he said, placing a finger against her mouth.
Not passing up a golden opportunity to drive him crazy, she allowed her tongue to dart out and slide up the length of it. Tristan, taken completely be surprise, hit the brakes and turned to stare at her. Rory merely plastered an innocent smile on her face, her eyes wide and dancing.
"You just licked me."
"I did not."
"Yes, you did."
"No. I licked my lips. Anything that touched you, was clearly your fault. You're the one who put your finger against my lips." Rory protested lightly, a smirk lingering behind her words.
Tristan gave her a look, before shaking his head in amusement and starting back down the road.
*
"You never did tell me where we're going," Rory said, twenty minutes later as the car sped down the highway.
"You'll find out when we get there."
"No fair."
Tristan smirked and laughed when she slapped him on the arm for it.
"Tristan, c'mon."
"Nope."
"Tristan."
"No."
"Bible-Boy."
"Hmm.."
"Spawn of Satan."
"Ah.."
"Love O' My Life."
"I"m not going to tell you."
Rory frowned and sat back in her seat, crossing her arms. "Fine. I don't wanna know."
Tristan raised an eyebrow at her and turned his attention back to the road. It was only a few minutes later that she began to fidget again. Glancing over at her, the smirk reappeared. "Its killing you, isn't it?"
"No."
"That was just so convincing."
"I'm not talking to you."
"Fine."
"Fine."
Another five minutes of silence proved to be too much. "Why won't you just tell me?"
"Because then it wouldn't be a surprise."
"But I hate surprises."
As they pulled into a town and stopped at a red light, Tristan leaned over and smiled. "You'll like this one. Trust me."
"Are we almost there at least?"
"Yep."
"I guess I can wait," Rory sighed in resignation, her eyes watching the new surroundings pass them by outside. Finally, they pulled into what she observed to be a marina. Casting him an inquisitive look, she watched as they approached a tiny building. Once there, he parked and came around to the other side to open her door.
"Come on."
Intrigued, she took his hand and let him lead her up the steps to the front door of the building. He motioned for her to stay outside of a moment and he disappeared indoors. A few minutes later he reappeared, a key in his hand and a smile adorning his face. Taking her hand again, he pulled her towards the docks, where boats were lined up, all different shapes, sizes, colors. His eyes swept over each of them before they came to a stop in front of a large yacht. Stepping aboard, he pulled her with him, his eyes twinkling at her confused look.
"What.."
"You said you'd never been on a boat before."
A grin spread across her face and she jumped up and showered his with kisses. After whispering a thank you, she followed him further onboard, gazing around at the boat. She jumped slightly as the engine roared to life and it was then she noticed another man, his face tanned by the sun, manning the ship, as Tristan spoke to him.The man nodded and Tristan came back to stand at her side, his arm snaking out, wrapping itself around her waist, pulling her to him.
"You like?"
"I love. Thank you."
He laughed as their lips came to meet each other half way....
*
Rory sat up in bed abruptly, her body bathed in sweat. This had to stop. While all these memories stopped plaguing her during the day, they had begun to haunt her in the night hours. This was the fourth night in a row she had dreamt of them and all the amazing things Tristan had done for her. Glancing at the clock, she noted the time and fell back on her pillow, her eyes threatening to spill over with tears. That day had been so amazing. It had been at the end of August, after they first got together. He had taken it upon himself to see that she got to experience everything she hadn't up to that point. And that included the day long trip on his family's yacht, just drifting around the lake, the sun basking down on them as they shared an intimate day together. It had been on that day she had realized she was in love with him. Without a doubt, head over heels in love. Wiping away a tear, she threw off the blankets and went to shower. She was leaving for Israel in just a few short hours to begin her lifelong dream job.
Leaving for Israel, and leaving these memories behind.
So she hoped.
******
Hmmkay. Just so this is known, at the moment, I have no clue where I'm taking this now. If you have any suggestions, whatsoever, review to let me know, email me, IM me, whatever. I'll love you forever, I will. :) Ciao.
-- Shay
Hey ya'll! Do you even remember this story? Hehe. Anyways, the author that took over this story for the past four chapters isn't going to be finishing the story and since I *hate* leaving my stories unfinished, I decided to pick it up again. If you haven't read her portion of the story, you can find it at http://www.fanfiction.net/read.php?storyid=878047 . Make sure you read them before you read this part.. Now I know I've been really bad with the updating of my stories lately, but I promise that they all will be updated within the next two weeks (well, the chapters will be written. Posting depends on when I get them back from my betas).. And hmm.. yeah, I think thats about it. Remember to read - and review. Its the nice thing to do.
Chapter 24
but how do I let go when I've, loved him for so long and I've, givin him all that I could
maybe love is a hopeless crime, giving up what seems your lifetime
what went wrong with something once so good
Rory stared absentmindedly out the window of the plane, watching the landscape below quickly fade away as they ascended into the air. Down below her, was everything she had ever known. Her entire world. Her mother, Luke, her grandparents, Lane, Jess... Tristan. And she was leaving them, jetting off to New York, where she would learn the ropes, be prepared for whatever she would meet once she left the States, traveling into far distances, so unknown, so scary. For the millionth time since she had walked out of her and Tristan's townhome that fateful day, she felt regret and resistance forcing its way into her heart and her mind. Shaking her head, she shoved her hands in her coat pocket, determined not to think about those things. This is what she had wanted for as long as she could remember. She was an adult, she'd get used to not having her friends and family there whenever she needed them.
Suddenly something cool came into contact with her hand, deep within the depth of the blue jean jacket she wore. Confused, she hooked her finger around it and pulled it out, sucking in her breath when she did. There, dangling from her forefinger, was the golden charm bracelet Tristan had given to her for their six month anniversary, shortly before they moved in together. She gently cradled it in her hand, her eyes filling with tears as it twinkled in the sunlight, filtering in through the window beside her. Touching it softly, she let her fingers run over the surface of the charms that hung from the chain, pushing memories to the forefront of her mind. Almost as if in some unbearable pain, she squeezed her fist closed over it, closing her eyes tightly, willing the tears to go away. After a few moments, she reopened them, her blue eyes still wet, but no tears came forth. Swallowing the lump in her throat, she shoved the bracelet back into her pocket and went back to looking out the window.
*****
Mumbling to himself, Tristan rolled over in his bed, letting out a tortured sigh as he caught the time on the bedside clock. Closing his eyes was futile, as they flew right back open two minutes later when the intrusive object began its shrill wake up call. Something about that clock just reminded him all to much of military school. Slamming a hand down on it to shut it off, he groaned and pushed himself out of bed. Blindly, he stumbled towards the door and across the hall to the bathroom, stopping as he realized his mistake.
There, before him, was the unfinished project Rory had insisted they do together. It had been a long two weeks when she had announced they didn't spend nearly enough time together, with work and prior commitments, so in an attempt to bring their lives back in sync with one another and finish a project they'd put off for far too long, she decided they were going to remodel the bathroom together. They had been nearly finished when the call had came, and he stared now, at the half-finished tiled floor, the two walls that were painted a pastel blue, while the others were still covered in the gaudiest green color the previous owners had used. There were still cans of paint sitting in the bathtub, along with paint brushes and the remaining boxes of tiles for the floor. Sitting on the edge of the sink was a forgotten scrunchie of Rory's, a white one, decorated with rainbows, which he had teased her endlessly about. Stepping slowly into the room, he picked up the scrunchie, wrapping his fingers tightly around it, biting his lower lip as he tried to hold onto his feelings.
A hollow sound escaped his throat as he dropped it to the floor and stormed out of the room and back towards his bed.
******
"I'll go talk to him," Jess interrupted, as Lorelai and Luke continued to bicker, in their usual positions, one behind the counter, the other sitting in front of it.
The three had been discussing the current situation between two people they all cared deeply about. Both Lorelai and Jess had spoken to Rory earlier that day, and both had come to the conclusion she was miserable. Summer had also phoned earlier, saying she had spoken to Tristan and he was just as bad, if not worse.
"No, I'll talk to him," Lorelai protested after taking a long swig of the coffee that sat in front of her. "There's something I need to ask him anyway."
Luke rolled his eyes. "Let Jess talk to him, Lorelai. They're friends, it'll be a lot less awkward for him."
Lorelai frowned at him. "I'm his friend. We're friendly-ish. Friendish."
"I'll talk to him," Jess restated before grabbing his coat and heading out the door. Lorelai glared at his back, sighing as the bell above the door tinkled as he departed.
******
"Dammit," Tristan grumbled under his breath, tossing the pen down on the desk. He had been sitting here for the past three hours, vainly attempting to get some sort of work done. Instead, his eyes kept wandering back to the picture frame that held his all time favorite photo of Rory, which now lay face down on his desk. This was impossible, he wasn't going to get any work done like this. Standing, he stretched and headed into the living room. Grabbing the phone, he quickly ordered some chinese and sat down on the couch, flipping on the television. After a few minutes of channel surfing, the doorbell rang, saving him from his thoughts. Turning the TV off, he made his way to the door, letting out a sigh of relief when he saw Jess on the other side.
"Mariano."
"DuGrey," Jess replied, the same sarcastic tone. The two shook their heads, one of dark locks, the other of blonde tufts and Tristan stepped aside to let his friend in.
Jess shrugged off his jacket, tossing it carelessly over a chair and turned towards Tristan. "How you holding up?"
Tristan rolled his eyes. Jess was nothing, if not blunt. "I'm fine."
"Mmhmm," Jess murmured, raising one eyebrow, clearly stating his disbelief.
"I am."
"Okay."
"Never better."
"Great."
"A jig is forthcoming."
At that, Jess shook his head. "DuGrey, DuGrey.. I know you better then that. Lie to yourself all you want, but I'm not falling for it."
"I..I've been better, okay? Today just has been a bad day and I don't feel like talking about it."
"Okay."
"Okay."
Silence followed as the two sat down on opposite ends of the couch, both staring into oblivion, and both minds dancing around the same subject.
Hesitantly, Tristan cleared his throat. "Have you umm.. have you talked to her?"
Jess gave a positive bob of his head before glancing up at him. "She called this morning."
"How is she?"
"She's okay. She misses you."
"Really? She said that?"
"Oh, yeah. First thing out of her mouth." That was a slight embellishment on his part, seeing as it had been an hour into their conversation that she had even brought him up, quite reluctantly at that, only to ask how he was doing. But he knew Rory, and could tell just from the tone of her voice that she missed him terribly.
Tristan's usually bright blue eyes darkened slightly at that and he slouched down on the couch in thought. "Hmm.."
"Tristan, man, why don't you just call her? She misses you and you obviously miss her. I know you're big on that whole pride thing, but dammit, you love each other. Are you really that willing to lose her over something so.. not worth it?"
"I can't," Tristan said, his eyes on the floor. "She made the choice. It's up to her if she wants there to be an us. I'm not going to stop her from living out her dreams because I have some selfish need to keep her with me forever. I love her too much to do that."
Jess sighed and shook his head. "I hope you know what you're doing.."
******
"Where are we going?" Rory giggled as Tristan pulled the car they were seated in, out of his garage and onto the street.
Tristan glanced over at her and grinned. "You'll see."
"Aw, c'mon. You know I hate surprises," Rory whined, giving him her best puppy eyes and a pout upon her lips.
Chuckling, he shook his head. "I think you'll like this one."
"Triiistaaaaaaannn, pleeeeeeeeeassssseeee."
"Shh," he said, placing a finger against her mouth.
Not passing up a golden opportunity to drive him crazy, she allowed her tongue to dart out and slide up the length of it. Tristan, taken completely be surprise, hit the brakes and turned to stare at her. Rory merely plastered an innocent smile on her face, her eyes wide and dancing.
"You just licked me."
"I did not."
"Yes, you did."
"No. I licked my lips. Anything that touched you, was clearly your fault. You're the one who put your finger against my lips." Rory protested lightly, a smirk lingering behind her words.
Tristan gave her a look, before shaking his head in amusement and starting back down the road.
*
"You never did tell me where we're going," Rory said, twenty minutes later as the car sped down the highway.
"You'll find out when we get there."
"No fair."
Tristan smirked and laughed when she slapped him on the arm for it.
"Tristan, c'mon."
"Nope."
"Tristan."
"No."
"Bible-Boy."
"Hmm.."
"Spawn of Satan."
"Ah.."
"Love O' My Life."
"I"m not going to tell you."
Rory frowned and sat back in her seat, crossing her arms. "Fine. I don't wanna know."
Tristan raised an eyebrow at her and turned his attention back to the road. It was only a few minutes later that she began to fidget again. Glancing over at her, the smirk reappeared. "Its killing you, isn't it?"
"No."
"That was just so convincing."
"I'm not talking to you."
"Fine."
"Fine."
Another five minutes of silence proved to be too much. "Why won't you just tell me?"
"Because then it wouldn't be a surprise."
"But I hate surprises."
As they pulled into a town and stopped at a red light, Tristan leaned over and smiled. "You'll like this one. Trust me."
"Are we almost there at least?"
"Yep."
"I guess I can wait," Rory sighed in resignation, her eyes watching the new surroundings pass them by outside. Finally, they pulled into what she observed to be a marina. Casting him an inquisitive look, she watched as they approached a tiny building. Once there, he parked and came around to the other side to open her door.
"Come on."
Intrigued, she took his hand and let him lead her up the steps to the front door of the building. He motioned for her to stay outside of a moment and he disappeared indoors. A few minutes later he reappeared, a key in his hand and a smile adorning his face. Taking her hand again, he pulled her towards the docks, where boats were lined up, all different shapes, sizes, colors. His eyes swept over each of them before they came to a stop in front of a large yacht. Stepping aboard, he pulled her with him, his eyes twinkling at her confused look.
"What.."
"You said you'd never been on a boat before."
A grin spread across her face and she jumped up and showered his with kisses. After whispering a thank you, she followed him further onboard, gazing around at the boat. She jumped slightly as the engine roared to life and it was then she noticed another man, his face tanned by the sun, manning the ship, as Tristan spoke to him.The man nodded and Tristan came back to stand at her side, his arm snaking out, wrapping itself around her waist, pulling her to him.
"You like?"
"I love. Thank you."
He laughed as their lips came to meet each other half way....
*
Rory sat up in bed abruptly, her body bathed in sweat. This had to stop. While all these memories stopped plaguing her during the day, they had begun to haunt her in the night hours. This was the fourth night in a row she had dreamt of them and all the amazing things Tristan had done for her. Glancing at the clock, she noted the time and fell back on her pillow, her eyes threatening to spill over with tears. That day had been so amazing. It had been at the end of August, after they first got together. He had taken it upon himself to see that she got to experience everything she hadn't up to that point. And that included the day long trip on his family's yacht, just drifting around the lake, the sun basking down on them as they shared an intimate day together. It had been on that day she had realized she was in love with him. Without a doubt, head over heels in love. Wiping away a tear, she threw off the blankets and went to shower. She was leaving for Israel in just a few short hours to begin her lifelong dream job.
Leaving for Israel, and leaving these memories behind.
So she hoped.
******
Hmmkay. Just so this is known, at the moment, I have no clue where I'm taking this now. If you have any suggestions, whatsoever, review to let me know, email me, IM me, whatever. I'll love you forever, I will. :) Ciao.
-- Shay