Anyway, because ff.net's servers have been being evil on me I might not be updating too much, and also because I recently got a kitten. In any case, enjoy! (And review)
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Artemis brought up a map of France on his laptop. Judging by the size of the plane, the speed they were traveling at, and an estimate of how much fuel they were carrying, the plane would most likely run out of fuel and need to crash-land somewhere around Paris.
Suddenly he checked the date on his computer. July 16th.
The horror of what would happen should he meet Holly only lasted a moment. His mind set to work. Let's think worst case scenario, he thought. God decides to be cruel and land us smack dab near the Paris chute. They should all be gone by now...but if they're not, for whatever reason, I must hide the stone. Captain Short certainly won't take well to there being not only a stone in her hand, but one in mine.
But where...
***
Artemis had to work pretty hard to get the stone down the toilet. He hated physical labor and grunted several times in exhaustion as he shoved it down. The lavatory entrance said "Occupied" for quite a long time and as he came out a man grinned sympathetically at him and said, "Yup, that airplane food will do it to you everytime." Artemis blushed and tried to get away, but the man pushed a bottle of pills into his hand. "I take these to stay regular. They work like a charm!"
Shaking his head, Artemis settled into his chair. Might as well get some sleep; this was going to be a long night.
***
The plane violently shook Artemis awake. He blinked, and was dimly aware of a throbbing pain on his head and people screaming. "Dream." he muttered and went back to sleep.
***
He felt a sharp slap on his cheek.
"Wake up, Irlandskii." sneered a female voice, heavy with Russian accent. Artemis dully tried to place where the accent came from...he recognized it from somewhere...
"I SAID WAKE UP!" He felt another slap and shook himself awake. He felt his hand to his head...a hailstone sized bump raised his jet black hair and he groaned.
"Where is the stone?" the Russian voice asked. Despite all, Artemis managed to smirk and shake his head. "I don't know what you're talking about." he said, trying to sound like your average stupid American teenager.
"Don't play stupid with me Irlandskii. You are the infamous Artemis Fowl, who actually managed to cheat the Mafiya last year. You think we don't recognize conterfeits? Boss through a huge fit when he saw what Vassikan and his barbarians managed to bring back. Boss wants to see you...make a deal...you have gotten your hands on a very valuable little pebble. Now why don't you be a good little brat and give it to Kashka?" She shoved an open palm with long manicured fingers (much like Artemis' own fingers) in his face.
"Look man, I'm just a kid okay? Just a kid and I don't know what the hell you're talking about, and I don't give a crap either." Artemis struggled a bit with his American, but thought that he sounded pretty much like any other American kid on holiday in Europe.
"Really," Kashka said evenly, as though struggling not to lose her temper. "You must have a very rich father to be able to afford Armani."
Artemis cursed inwardly. Why hadn't he worn the jacket Butler gave him? He thought fast. "Yeah man my dad's into computers and stuff. He uh...works for Bill Gates."
Kashka slapped him again. "Tell me the truth you insignificant bit of filth. I know you're Artemis Fowl; you match the description Boss gave me perfectly. And then there's the fact that you have several emails from a 'Butler' on your laptop...you know you're just like that idiot father--he was quite evasive too."
Artemis didn't quite know what to do for about two seconds...
"Eugh!" Kashka exploded into a long chain of words that Artemis guessed were most likely Russian curses as she wiped his spit off her face.
"Don't you ever dare insult my father again." Artemis hissed.
Kashka seemed to furious to respond to this, so she just threw him down in disgust and proceeded to go through his bags. Finally in frustration, she turned to him again. "Look here Irlandskii--this is your last chance. You either decide to be a good little spoiled European supergenius and give me the stone, or my men in your Manor will decide that your Butler is no longer needed and do away with him, understand?"
"I...don't have the stone." Artemis pretended to sigh. "It's at our summer villa in...Rome."
Kashka seemed to pause, and then glaring at him suspiciously, she pulled out her cell phone. In rapid Russian Artemis interpreted that her men were being directed to scour Rome for a villa under the name of Fowl. Fortunately, he actually did have a villa there that Juliet occasionally visited, but she wasn't there now.
And that was when all hell broke loose.
***
Holly was about to fire a dozen rapid rounds of Neutrino charges at the goblins when Butler softly nudged her elbow. Standing stalk still next to one of the goblins was a young Mud girl, probably French. A gun was pointed to her head. "Guns." barked one goblin, apparently the leader judging by the large size of his gun as compared to the other goblins'. Reluctantly, Holly loosened grip on her blaster. But inside she knew that she had a backup gun tucked inside her belt pouch. Root did the same, and Butler seemed confused for a moment. Holly realized he didn't have a backup, and the goblins would be far more dangerous armed with a Sig Sauer.
"Hand over the girl first." she said quickly.
Being Goblins of course, they handed her over and continued to menacingly glare. "Idiots," muttered Holly, firing the dozen rounds she'd planned earlier. Soon there were nothing but a pile of unconscious goblins lying on the field. Holly looked into the eyes of the terrified girl and said in thick mesmer, "You will go back home, and if anyone asks where you were you will say you were...shopping."
Concentrating on her magic and being very tired, Holly didn't realize the girl had shut her eyes. She opened them and smiled a terrifying smile. In a fluid motion she grabbed Holly's Neutrino. "Foolish fairy. You didn't think I'd fall for that, did you?" Perfect Fairy. This was no ordinary French Mud girl. She turned the gun up the highest it would go and pointed it at Holly's head. "Now, I know you have the Omnipotens Petra. So hand it over before your little friend gets her brains fried." She barked to Root, who growled and handed it over to her. Butler, Holly noticed, was looking very nervous all of a sudden. But the girl only grinned and pulled a remote out of nowhere. Pushing a button, a beautiful convertible zoomed up. She hopped in and, cackling, drove off.
There was silence for a few moments. And then Holly broke it by saying, "Well Butler, I don't expect the gold back. But I'll say this; this couldn't get ANY worse!"
No Holly, it can always get worse, a voice in Holly's head said. It proved to be right, because just then they were nearly ran over by a plane.