Chapter 12:
Earlier that night, when I had phoned Miguel and told him to come over
because I had something important to tell him, this was what he said: "I have
something for you too, Kay."
But thinking about my big dilemma had made me forget all about his surprise. I
now realize that he never even gave me that surprise. I wonder what it was. I still don't
know, but I have a feeling it was something I would like. Oh well. Anyways, Miguel
kept looking at me, confused.
"Kay," he said looking frustrated, "why would you want to leave Ricky and me
behind while you go to college for four years? And why that particular college?"
"Miguel," I said quietly, following Charity's orders, "I'm taking Ricky with
me." I knew those words would hurt him just like everything else I was saying that
night already had.
He looked at me, agape. "W-Why? Taking Ricky with you? What about me?
What about us?! And why are you going so far away?"
Miguel hardly ever got mad at anything but he was getting close to it that night.
"Miguel, I really want to! This is a great oppurtunity! Please, I need to do this.
You understand, right?"
He didn't reply. He turned his back to me as he absorbed everything I said.
"Why do you want to leave your life here? You have everything and anything you
could possibly need! Kay, why are you doing this? I know you. There must be some
other reason..."
"D-Don't be silly, Miguel!" I stammered. "I want to go to Connecticut. You can
relate to how I'm feeling, can't you?"
Miguel nodded slowly and sadly, giving in. I knew he would. He was always the
most considerate person here in Harmony. I loved him for it.
"I can't stop you, Kay. You have a right to do what you want. When are you
leaving?" he asked in a discouraged tone.
"In two days," I answered.
He nodded as the information set in. He looked so sad, how I wanted to tell him
the truth, about what Charity was threatening to do to Ricky! But I couldn't.
I hate you, Charity Standish, I thought to myself. Look what you are doing to
me, Ricky and Miguel!
"I better go home," Miguel said. "Mama's waiting for me."
"Oh wait, Miguel," I stopped him. "What was your surprise?"
He didn't answer me for a few seconds. He put his hand in his pocket and
touched something that was obviously there. That was probably my surprise.
"It's nothing," he said. "There's no point in giving it to you now."
With that, he walked out, closing more than just the front door behind him. He
was closing any chance of us being happy together in the future.
I looked at the closed door, tears coming to my eyes. I fell down into the sofa,
tears flowing on the couch. I didn't want to leave! I didn't want to hurt Miguel. Things
were going great between us and now... it was hell.
* * * * *
Daddy and Ivy came home a little bit after Miguel left. I told them that I
wanted to go to Connecticut to pursue a college education. They seemed surprised and
puzzled but they didn't say much. Wished me luck. Were supportive. They knew
something was wrong, but they also thought I could take care of it.
Beth and Gwen came over to my house the next day. They seemed angry.
"We heard that you're going away to pursue a college education. What's the
deal, Kay?" Beth asked, trying to get me to open up. She could tell I wouldn't leave
Harmony to go to the University of Connecticut voluntarily, and she wanted to know
why I was really going.
"Kay," Gwen said trying to calm down a very pregnant Beth, "It's just that, we
know you and well, this doesn't seem like something you would do. Especially now that
things are so great between you and Miguel."
I sighed. I wanted to tell them the truth. They were the closest friends I had.
Simone and Reese had just about given up on our friendships and barely talked to me
anymore. And Jessica was barely around for me to confide in her. But Gwen and Beth
cared. They deserved to know, as did Miguel. But I couldn't tell either of them the
truth.
"Look," I told the two of them, "going away to college was something I wanted
to do ever since I was 18. I was planning to do that - then I had Ricky. But now I can
go. And why shouldn't I?"
"But why all the way to Connecticut?!" Gwen practically shouted, getting
almost as frustrated and impatient as Beth.
"Because I did some research and that school has everything I am looking for,"
I lied.
Beth threw her hands up in the arm, muttering to herself. Grabbing her purse,
she left my house, angrier than ever. Gwen looked at Beth just as she slammed the
front door shut behind her. She then turned to stare at me.
"I really advise you to think this over, Kay," she told me. "Something MUST
have happened for you to want to leave. Is everything ok?"
I nodded. "Nothing's wrong, Gwen. Trust me. I WANT to do this."
She sighed, nodding her head. "I should go, too." she said sadly. "I'll come by
tomorrow to see you leave."
"Ok," I answered, tears clouding up my eyes. Gwen and Beth had been so
close in finding out the truth, but once again I couldn't tell them. Maybe one day I
would. Just not right now.
* * * * *
Fourty hours later, I was in an airport, getting ready to leave Harmony and my
life (as I knew it). Miguel was there, but the whole time he acted forlorn. I couldn't
blame him. I was abandoning him and taking his son away in the process! I just wanted
to give him a big kiss, be in his arms forever and run away (with Ricky) from this big
mess that Charity had created of our lives.
I quickly said goodbye to my family, to Beth, Liz, Gwen, and Pilar. The last
person waiting for me was Miguel.
"Miguel," I said, grabbing his arm. "Never forget me, ok? I love you so much!
Don't ever forget the love we have! Take care, and I'll be back in four short years,
ok?" I was crying as I said those words.
Miguel gave me a hug and a kiss. "I love you, too, Kay, but it's not too late to
change your mind. Stay here. Don't leave me. What am I gonna do without you and
Ricky?" He gave me another hug and wouldn't let go.
"You'll be fine, Miguel. Don't forget us."
"I will never forget you, Kay. You and Ricky are my life."
I hoped he was right. I gave him a quick kiss on the mouth before turning to go.
Carrying my handbag and Ricky in my arms, I turned to get one more glimpse
of everyone I loved. They looked so sad. No sadder than me though. Little did I know
that four years later, this bunch was not going to be the same as I remembered them to
be.
Earlier that night, when I had phoned Miguel and told him to come over
because I had something important to tell him, this was what he said: "I have
something for you too, Kay."
But thinking about my big dilemma had made me forget all about his surprise. I
now realize that he never even gave me that surprise. I wonder what it was. I still don't
know, but I have a feeling it was something I would like. Oh well. Anyways, Miguel
kept looking at me, confused.
"Kay," he said looking frustrated, "why would you want to leave Ricky and me
behind while you go to college for four years? And why that particular college?"
"Miguel," I said quietly, following Charity's orders, "I'm taking Ricky with
me." I knew those words would hurt him just like everything else I was saying that
night already had.
He looked at me, agape. "W-Why? Taking Ricky with you? What about me?
What about us?! And why are you going so far away?"
Miguel hardly ever got mad at anything but he was getting close to it that night.
"Miguel, I really want to! This is a great oppurtunity! Please, I need to do this.
You understand, right?"
He didn't reply. He turned his back to me as he absorbed everything I said.
"Why do you want to leave your life here? You have everything and anything you
could possibly need! Kay, why are you doing this? I know you. There must be some
other reason..."
"D-Don't be silly, Miguel!" I stammered. "I want to go to Connecticut. You can
relate to how I'm feeling, can't you?"
Miguel nodded slowly and sadly, giving in. I knew he would. He was always the
most considerate person here in Harmony. I loved him for it.
"I can't stop you, Kay. You have a right to do what you want. When are you
leaving?" he asked in a discouraged tone.
"In two days," I answered.
He nodded as the information set in. He looked so sad, how I wanted to tell him
the truth, about what Charity was threatening to do to Ricky! But I couldn't.
I hate you, Charity Standish, I thought to myself. Look what you are doing to
me, Ricky and Miguel!
"I better go home," Miguel said. "Mama's waiting for me."
"Oh wait, Miguel," I stopped him. "What was your surprise?"
He didn't answer me for a few seconds. He put his hand in his pocket and
touched something that was obviously there. That was probably my surprise.
"It's nothing," he said. "There's no point in giving it to you now."
With that, he walked out, closing more than just the front door behind him. He
was closing any chance of us being happy together in the future.
I looked at the closed door, tears coming to my eyes. I fell down into the sofa,
tears flowing on the couch. I didn't want to leave! I didn't want to hurt Miguel. Things
were going great between us and now... it was hell.
* * * * *
Daddy and Ivy came home a little bit after Miguel left. I told them that I
wanted to go to Connecticut to pursue a college education. They seemed surprised and
puzzled but they didn't say much. Wished me luck. Were supportive. They knew
something was wrong, but they also thought I could take care of it.
Beth and Gwen came over to my house the next day. They seemed angry.
"We heard that you're going away to pursue a college education. What's the
deal, Kay?" Beth asked, trying to get me to open up. She could tell I wouldn't leave
Harmony to go to the University of Connecticut voluntarily, and she wanted to know
why I was really going.
"Kay," Gwen said trying to calm down a very pregnant Beth, "It's just that, we
know you and well, this doesn't seem like something you would do. Especially now that
things are so great between you and Miguel."
I sighed. I wanted to tell them the truth. They were the closest friends I had.
Simone and Reese had just about given up on our friendships and barely talked to me
anymore. And Jessica was barely around for me to confide in her. But Gwen and Beth
cared. They deserved to know, as did Miguel. But I couldn't tell either of them the
truth.
"Look," I told the two of them, "going away to college was something I wanted
to do ever since I was 18. I was planning to do that - then I had Ricky. But now I can
go. And why shouldn't I?"
"But why all the way to Connecticut?!" Gwen practically shouted, getting
almost as frustrated and impatient as Beth.
"Because I did some research and that school has everything I am looking for,"
I lied.
Beth threw her hands up in the arm, muttering to herself. Grabbing her purse,
she left my house, angrier than ever. Gwen looked at Beth just as she slammed the
front door shut behind her. She then turned to stare at me.
"I really advise you to think this over, Kay," she told me. "Something MUST
have happened for you to want to leave. Is everything ok?"
I nodded. "Nothing's wrong, Gwen. Trust me. I WANT to do this."
She sighed, nodding her head. "I should go, too." she said sadly. "I'll come by
tomorrow to see you leave."
"Ok," I answered, tears clouding up my eyes. Gwen and Beth had been so
close in finding out the truth, but once again I couldn't tell them. Maybe one day I
would. Just not right now.
* * * * *
Fourty hours later, I was in an airport, getting ready to leave Harmony and my
life (as I knew it). Miguel was there, but the whole time he acted forlorn. I couldn't
blame him. I was abandoning him and taking his son away in the process! I just wanted
to give him a big kiss, be in his arms forever and run away (with Ricky) from this big
mess that Charity had created of our lives.
I quickly said goodbye to my family, to Beth, Liz, Gwen, and Pilar. The last
person waiting for me was Miguel.
"Miguel," I said, grabbing his arm. "Never forget me, ok? I love you so much!
Don't ever forget the love we have! Take care, and I'll be back in four short years,
ok?" I was crying as I said those words.
Miguel gave me a hug and a kiss. "I love you, too, Kay, but it's not too late to
change your mind. Stay here. Don't leave me. What am I gonna do without you and
Ricky?" He gave me another hug and wouldn't let go.
"You'll be fine, Miguel. Don't forget us."
"I will never forget you, Kay. You and Ricky are my life."
I hoped he was right. I gave him a quick kiss on the mouth before turning to go.
Carrying my handbag and Ricky in my arms, I turned to get one more glimpse
of everyone I loved. They looked so sad. No sadder than me though. Little did I know
that four years later, this bunch was not going to be the same as I remembered them to
be.