Part Eleven
NOTE: A Chicken Walker, also know as an AT-ST (All Terrain Scout Transport), can be seen in Return of the Jedi. They are those gigantic, two-legged machines that you see walking around on the forest moon during the Ewok battle.
INT. DEATH STAR – HALLWAY
Our favourite heroes shuffle their way deeper into the mind-boggling labyrinth that is the Death Star, Yoda in the lead.
YODA
Hope I do, that threatened by lightsabres, no one is.
He unclips his lightsabre from his belt and ignites it with a SNAP-HISS. A shaft of light appears, but there is no definitive colour – the colours keep changing.
Lando squeaks and jumps backwards.
HAN
Oy, relax! (Mutters) Idiot.
LANDO
Hey, I heard that!
HAN
Never mind. Wasn't talking 'bout you
LANDO
Oh.
They approach a huge blast door. Yoda keys in a code and the doors rumble open. He begins to say something, but is interrupted by Threepio.
THREEPIO
(Excitedly)
Why, my goodness, this is the Wookiee settlement of Deryshjakk!!! I've read so much about this city in –
Luke slaps him.
THREEPIO
Ouch!
LUKE
Shut up, Threepio.
THREEPIO
Shutting up, sir.
Chewbacca sees a very well-disguised door at the corner of his eye.
CHEWIE
~Oh, sh**…~
LANDO
Chewie, hang on –
Chewie ignores him and runs to the door. It slides open as he approaches and the rest of the gang follows.
Chewie sees what is inside and hollers.
BEN
Chewie, wait a minute!
The gang starts running after Chewie again, into the new room. At the centre of the room is a smouldering funeral pyre. Chewie falls to him knees, trying hard not to cry, as Yoda tries to decipher the symbols written on the funeral post. The door slides shut
YODA
Need glasses, I do.
What, is that what it says?
YODA
(Glares at the camera)
No! Idiots you are! Says, it does…Lies here, Mallatobuck, wife of Chewbacca does.
Chewie bursts into tears.
YODA
(Cont'd, to Chewie)
Cry not, Chewie. Free, you are. Had a wife, I once did. Nightmare, she was!
Everyone else sighs and rolls their eyes. Yoda shuts up and shuffles his way over to a dusty holoprojector lying near the pyre. He picks it up and activates it.
HAN
I –
LUKE
-Have a bad feeling about this.
HAN
Am I really getting that predictable?
LUKE
Yep.
HAN
I really don't think we should hang around much longer.
THREEPIO
If anyone would like to know the odds of –
ARTOO
*No, Threepio.*
DETOO
*Trust me, we don't.*
THREEPIO
…Well, really!
YODA
Shut up, you must! Watching a holorecording, I am!
The holoprojector start to whir as it shines a blue light. A smaller, terrified version of Mallatobuck appears.
MALLA
~If anyone's going to find this, they've overrun the bridge and both of the main halls. We've got guards covering all the areas, but we can't hold for much longer…~
She appears to stumble and, a rumbling noise can be heard from the holoprojector, punctuated by mechanical stamping and grinding.
MALLA
(Cont'd)
~It's coming. We try our hardest to defend ourselves, but the power of their giant walking weapons is too strong for many of us.~
The projection begins to crackle and fizz with static.
MALLA
(Cont'd)
~They've managed to trap us…They're getting closer by the second…Oh!~
The recording fades completely into static.
Sadly, Yoda, flicks the holoprojector off in silence.
Meanwhile, Detoo is standing at a socket in the wall and trying to access the Death Star's computer network. Suddenly a bolt of electricity leaps out at him and touches him with an ear-splitting CRACK, which resonates. Detoo yelps and falls over backwards, the CLUNK from that also resonates.
DETOO
(Gets up, sheepishly)
*Sorry.*
YODA
You will be!
There is suddenly an awkward silence as something very faint can be heard in the distance. Suddenly Luke's lightsabre ignites, while still attached to his belt.
LUKE
(Jumps)
AGGGGHHH!!!
Artoo and Detoo try hard not to snigger. However, the others do not find this so funny, as they draw their weapons.
HAN
(Brandishing his blaster)
We've got company!
Lando runs out the door and checks around the corner, down different corridors. He starts running back after several blaster bolts singe his hair.
LANDO
(Screams)
CLOSE THE DOOR, CLOSE THE DOOR! THEY'VE GOT…THEY'VE GOT…
He faints. Chewie runs over to him and pats him lightly on the side of the face to wake him up.
CHEWIE
~What? What do they have? Tell me, so I can beat the hell out of it!~
Lando whispers something and Chewie's face paces.
CHEWIE
~Alright then…Luke, droids, stay close to Yoda!~
LUKE
Yeah, I'm not arguing with that! C'mon, Threepio, Artoo and Detoo!
He and the droids run up behind Yoda.
A random blast roars into the room, hitting the control panel that controls the door, before anyone works up the guts to go over and close it. For a moment, everyone stares forlornly as the panel is engulfed in sparks.
BEN
(picking up a stormtrooper rifle)
%^&*! Lando, give me some more energy cells!
Lando takes the energy cells from some spare stormtrooper rifles and throws them all at Ben, who takes them and charges his rifle. Ben runs over to the side of the door and props the rifle against his shoulder, as does Han.
HAN
So much for trying to block it!
As stormtroopers begin to show from around the corners, laser bolts fly from Ben's rifle and Han's blaster and strike the troopers. The familiar grinding and stamping noise gets louder and louder, filling our heroes with fear and dread (though many of them still deny it to this day). Chewie, Lando and Yoda try to do away with more stormtroopers.
Meanwhile, as Stormtroopers pour into the room, Luke and the droids also spring into action. Luke tries his best (but still very unsuccessfully) to wave his lightsabre around like a pro, as Artoo and Detoo sneak up behind other unsuspecting troopers and zapping them in the butts.
Surprisingly, Threepio is the most successful, stamping his feet to shake out spare bolts, then picking up the bolts and flicking them to the troopers' heads. Their helmets crack and the troopers fall dead.
THREEPIO
(While fighting)
Why, I never knew I had it in me!
Suddenly, larger, much more powerful laser bolts scream into the room and rock it violently with explosions.
LANDO
CHICKEN WALKER!
The gigantic chicken walker stamps into the room, the floor shuddering with each step. It takes aim at Chewbacca, who ducks out of the way as soon as a blast hits the pyre. Chewie rolls into a crouching position, picking up a crossbow and attempting to fire it, not realising that it is completely spent.
Han jumps onto the walker's foot and climbs up its' leg, holding on tightly as the walker continues to run around. He grapples his way to the top and pulls open the hatch. Squeezing his eyes shut, he fires several blaster shots at the people inside the hatch. The walker lurches forward, shaking Han off. Han drops to the floor, does a forward roll and stands up again.
The walker's attentions are now on Luke, Artoo and Detoo. The two droids try to distract the walker by shooting sparks at it, but the walker is not fazed and continues to follow Luke, who runs into a small side-corridor that leads back into the room at the opposite end of the wall. He manages to stay hidden for a few moments, but the walker surprises him, making him fall over in shock.
LUKE
BEN!!! BEN!!!
Ben slams his lightsabre into the back of a stormtrooper and hears Luke's call. Luke slams his lightsabre into the walker's mechanical foot. Ben runs over to Luke, but is thrown backwards into the wall by the force of the walker's laser beam hitting near him. Frantically, Luke shakes Ben.
LUKE
WAKE UP, DAMN YOU! NOW ISN'T THE TIME TO SLEEP!!!
Luke dodges more of the walker's laser blasts, but the walker soon manages to stamp on him, appearing to crush him flat. Threepio sees this and wails.
THREEPIO
Oh, Master Luke! Curse my metal body, I wasn't fast enough!
Artoo and Detoo charge at the walker, spraying huge jets of water at the windows and there disorienting the people controlling it enough for Han to get a clear shot up its' laser cannons. Carefully aiming his blaster, he fires.
There is a moment of silence, before the walker keels over on its' side and bursts into flame.
Awakened by this, Ben shakes his head in a daze, before he focuses on Luke.
BEN
Oh, no…
Luke lies on the floor, seemingly unconscious. He then opens his eyes, blinking and sits up. We see that the pressure of the walker's foot has created an imprint in the ground, as well as hear Luke's joints cracking.
THREEPIO
Oh, thank the Maker!
LUKE
I'm fine everyone, thanks for asking.
BEN
But the pressure of that foot should have crushed you flat…I don't believe it!
YODA
Hm…sense it, I do…more to this boy, there is, than we can see…
Luke reveals what saved him from being crushed flat – the armour made of Super-Tough Plasteel that Owen had given him.
CHEWIE
~I want some Super-Tough Plasteel Armour!~
BEN
I want some, too!
HAN
Luke, I'll pay you a thousand credits –
LANDO
Two thousand!
HAN
Three thousand!
The squabbling between the four of them is silenced by the sound of more stormtroopers marching in their direction.
YODA
Hurry! To the Long, Narrow Bridge, we must flee!