I suggest that you go to http://www.iamasu.easynet.be/fanart3.htm and
listen to the 'song' playing while reading the chappie because I think it
really fits the forlorn mood of this chapter. (although you might get sick
of it quickly^_^) *sigh *
Enjoy and please review!
"That stupid bitch!!"
Deep in the forest bearing his namesake, we find the white haired hanyou in a rage.
"How DARE she? That wench thinks that everything is more important than finding the shards! Does she ever stop thinking about herself?"
The next few fractured sentences he sputtered were incoherent as his claws began to shred the nearest tree. After much debris lay where almost a quarter of the forest was, Inuyasha's mood calmed down a bit, but then remembering this whole shard mess was Kagome's fault (by shattering the jewel), and his hair-trigger anger returned.
Even though his rage gave him a temporary energy boost, his muscles began to protest, being that he was half human and all. He heaved an angry sigh and sat heavily on an unbroken branch.
Once his mood cooled further, he started to think about his current predicament, completely ignoring the recent brash words given to him by Kagome. Before she even came along, he was happy with Kikyo.
It was a wary happiness, a first love happiness, an uncertain-about-how-you- feel happiness. He was going to become human. He was finally going to escape from the torture of being a half-demon. Inuyasha's eyes glazed over with what seemed like recent memory. It felt like only yesterday when Kikyo had told him they could live together in peace at last.
How wonderfully free he felt! He remembered his young heart swell with joy.
He shook his head. If only those days were still among him. Maybe it almost WAS yesterday. After all, 50 years was a grain of sand on the beach of time to a demon, especially taking into consideration that he had spent the whole time in a void of unfeeling unconsciousness. It had been days before he was sealed that Kikyo had approached him.
The clouds darkened, and Inuyasha's wistful face turned quickly to a scowl.
And then, HE came. Naraku ruined everything. Yes, he did kill Kikyo, but perhaps what pained Inuyasha most was that she died believing that he himself betrayed her. Inuyasha closed his eyes in pain. Although he wouldn't admit even to himself, the pain he felt from the accident threatened to overtake him. So many emotions swirled through his mind at the moment.
The darkness enveloped him, and he felt just like a child: feeble and scared. He was scared that he would never love again. Although he often said love showed weakness, he didn't want to live the rest of his life alone.
He did have Kagome..but no. He felt he could never love her. He didn't want what happened to Kikyo to happen again, and he certainly didn't need TWO half dead women wanting him dead for angry revenge.
But if he did choose to be with Kikyo..that meant Kagome's heart would shatter. Deep inside, he didn't really want that to happen, but if it meant loving Kikyo again, nothing else really mattered.
If he knew it or not, Inuyasha was gambling with Kagome's emotions. He noticed out of the corner of his eye every time he went to see Kikyo, Kagome looked about to break.
Inuyasha didn't want anyone else but Kikyo, and Kagome was beginning to catch on, although she refused to admit it.
"Besides," Inuyasha assured himself aloud "it's not like I told Kagome to fall in love with me!"
A slight breeze stirred Inuyasha out of his pained thoughts, and he lifted his head up to look at the sky. He sighed. Sunset already? He got to his feet slowly and stared at the faint stars. A long time ago, he welcomed them. But that was before the sharp fangs of true reality sank themselves into his heart, causing him to harden his shell a substantial amount.
Suddenly, he tensed his legs and sprang to a branch a small distance away. And then jumped again, and he was off, "flying" to someplace that he could escape his tortured thoughts.
%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*
A ways away, Miroku was gazing at the same stars.
He sighed and held up his right palm. Yes, the cursed one. He surveyed it emotionlessly.
Only a few short years left of his wasting life remained before the air void swallowed him. Not even rosary beads would help him when that day came.
Miroku smiled bitterly. What a heroic way to go under eh? Sucking up yourself and everything around you into a nothingness void of hell..maybe he wouldn't even have the if you would call it, pleasure of going to hell. He would float forever on a just barely conscious level, where the black of night surrounded all, inside as well as outside.
He had decided a while ago that when that horrible day came, he would walk away, far away, from the people he cared about. So far, that maybe his soul would die of exhaustion before the air void grew to big for his hand. He had imagined that his friends would try to stop him from leaving, feebly saying not to give up hope. His stoic mask cracked as his face contorted into a frown. Hope. Ha! What a waste! There was no hope left for him. Naraku just couldn't be killed.
His face relaxed. No, there was no hope for good old Miroku the Lecher. His friends would probably try to keep him with them until the very end, but only Miroku knew that wasn't possible. Kagome, Shippo, Sango..especially Sango. Miroku smiled at the thought of Sango.
She deserved love, and it was Miroku's greatest torture to know that he couldn't be the one to give to her what she deserved, what she needed. What she needed was a man who would never leave her, never..Miroku sighed..never hurt her.
If he was to love Sango, then it would only hurt her for the worst when Miroku's end drew near. Miroku shook his head. He couldn't love her! He was only thinking of Sango's best interests, though even at times it didn't seem like it.
He was glad Sango never put much deeper thought as to why Miroku acted like such a pervert. He only acted like a lecher to keep Sango from thinking serious thoughts about a relationship with him. The usual chain events would happen: He would grope her, she would maim him, and then get in a huff, and immerse herself deeper in her thoughts of never being able to him.
Even though it clawed at him inside to push her away, (in a manner of speaking) it was definitely better than a few years of love, and then the crushing, inevitable heartbreak. Miroku knew she was one tough cookie, losing everyone she knew and still staying strong, but he feared that her heart just couldn't take it another time.
Although it hurt him inside to say so, he wanted her to be happy with another man, one that would take care of her the rest of her life. The poor boy realized firmly that love would never walk his way, so he might as well keep on doing anything to prevent any ugly situations from happening.
But, no one said he couldn't secretly admire Sango. Forget admire, it was full-blown love. No other girl had made him feel like the way he did when he was near Sango. It was a calming, blissful happiness, that washed thoughts of his doom away.
If it meant sacrificing his own happiness for Sango's, so be it.
%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*
In the last fading light, Sango came walking back from her long day visit to the hot springs. She figured after the fight, Kagome wouldn't be coming back very soon. The whole day, she was paranoid, constantly looking around to see if Miroku was watching like he usually did. But today, she surprised him.
She found no sign of him anywhere around the springs.
As she made it up to the top of the small hill, she spotted Miroku with his back against a jutting rock, quietly gazing up at the last of the sunset, wearing his usual emotion-missing mask.
"Hi Miroku." She said quietly. He didn't even seem to notice her presence. 'Hmm. The only time he looks like this is when he's thinking about his hand.'
Her thoughts were confirmed as he held up his cursed hand, turning it over and fingering the rosary beads.
She watched him smile, but of the bitterly sarcastic type, involving no humor whatsoever.
He then frowned, and his face relaxed, but went back to the mask he always wore.
A few more moments of silence, and he stirred, ready to leave. Sango shook her head sadly and continued along the path, heading for a quiet night's rest in Kaede's village.
When she heard him get up, she turned her head slightly to see him standing in the same spot, just staring up.
"So be it." She heard him mumble before he walked slowly past her, still obviously unaware of her.
'Wow..Miroku must be in a bad mood to not grope me..maybe I should be a little nicer to him.' She sighed deeply and continued once again along the path, ready for a little ramen and a good rest.
How did you like it? Yes? no? please review!! I know! This chapter was extremely boring, with no action. But I felt I had to set Inuyasha and Miroku's moods before I continued the story. And don't worry! The next chapter will get the plot moving nicely!
If I get enough reviews, I might get around to writing it!
Thanx to those 8 (still pitiful) who reviewed so far!
Enjoy and please review!
"That stupid bitch!!"
Deep in the forest bearing his namesake, we find the white haired hanyou in a rage.
"How DARE she? That wench thinks that everything is more important than finding the shards! Does she ever stop thinking about herself?"
The next few fractured sentences he sputtered were incoherent as his claws began to shred the nearest tree. After much debris lay where almost a quarter of the forest was, Inuyasha's mood calmed down a bit, but then remembering this whole shard mess was Kagome's fault (by shattering the jewel), and his hair-trigger anger returned.
Even though his rage gave him a temporary energy boost, his muscles began to protest, being that he was half human and all. He heaved an angry sigh and sat heavily on an unbroken branch.
Once his mood cooled further, he started to think about his current predicament, completely ignoring the recent brash words given to him by Kagome. Before she even came along, he was happy with Kikyo.
It was a wary happiness, a first love happiness, an uncertain-about-how-you- feel happiness. He was going to become human. He was finally going to escape from the torture of being a half-demon. Inuyasha's eyes glazed over with what seemed like recent memory. It felt like only yesterday when Kikyo had told him they could live together in peace at last.
How wonderfully free he felt! He remembered his young heart swell with joy.
He shook his head. If only those days were still among him. Maybe it almost WAS yesterday. After all, 50 years was a grain of sand on the beach of time to a demon, especially taking into consideration that he had spent the whole time in a void of unfeeling unconsciousness. It had been days before he was sealed that Kikyo had approached him.
The clouds darkened, and Inuyasha's wistful face turned quickly to a scowl.
And then, HE came. Naraku ruined everything. Yes, he did kill Kikyo, but perhaps what pained Inuyasha most was that she died believing that he himself betrayed her. Inuyasha closed his eyes in pain. Although he wouldn't admit even to himself, the pain he felt from the accident threatened to overtake him. So many emotions swirled through his mind at the moment.
The darkness enveloped him, and he felt just like a child: feeble and scared. He was scared that he would never love again. Although he often said love showed weakness, he didn't want to live the rest of his life alone.
He did have Kagome..but no. He felt he could never love her. He didn't want what happened to Kikyo to happen again, and he certainly didn't need TWO half dead women wanting him dead for angry revenge.
But if he did choose to be with Kikyo..that meant Kagome's heart would shatter. Deep inside, he didn't really want that to happen, but if it meant loving Kikyo again, nothing else really mattered.
If he knew it or not, Inuyasha was gambling with Kagome's emotions. He noticed out of the corner of his eye every time he went to see Kikyo, Kagome looked about to break.
Inuyasha didn't want anyone else but Kikyo, and Kagome was beginning to catch on, although she refused to admit it.
"Besides," Inuyasha assured himself aloud "it's not like I told Kagome to fall in love with me!"
A slight breeze stirred Inuyasha out of his pained thoughts, and he lifted his head up to look at the sky. He sighed. Sunset already? He got to his feet slowly and stared at the faint stars. A long time ago, he welcomed them. But that was before the sharp fangs of true reality sank themselves into his heart, causing him to harden his shell a substantial amount.
Suddenly, he tensed his legs and sprang to a branch a small distance away. And then jumped again, and he was off, "flying" to someplace that he could escape his tortured thoughts.
%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*
A ways away, Miroku was gazing at the same stars.
He sighed and held up his right palm. Yes, the cursed one. He surveyed it emotionlessly.
Only a few short years left of his wasting life remained before the air void swallowed him. Not even rosary beads would help him when that day came.
Miroku smiled bitterly. What a heroic way to go under eh? Sucking up yourself and everything around you into a nothingness void of hell..maybe he wouldn't even have the if you would call it, pleasure of going to hell. He would float forever on a just barely conscious level, where the black of night surrounded all, inside as well as outside.
He had decided a while ago that when that horrible day came, he would walk away, far away, from the people he cared about. So far, that maybe his soul would die of exhaustion before the air void grew to big for his hand. He had imagined that his friends would try to stop him from leaving, feebly saying not to give up hope. His stoic mask cracked as his face contorted into a frown. Hope. Ha! What a waste! There was no hope left for him. Naraku just couldn't be killed.
His face relaxed. No, there was no hope for good old Miroku the Lecher. His friends would probably try to keep him with them until the very end, but only Miroku knew that wasn't possible. Kagome, Shippo, Sango..especially Sango. Miroku smiled at the thought of Sango.
She deserved love, and it was Miroku's greatest torture to know that he couldn't be the one to give to her what she deserved, what she needed. What she needed was a man who would never leave her, never..Miroku sighed..never hurt her.
If he was to love Sango, then it would only hurt her for the worst when Miroku's end drew near. Miroku shook his head. He couldn't love her! He was only thinking of Sango's best interests, though even at times it didn't seem like it.
He was glad Sango never put much deeper thought as to why Miroku acted like such a pervert. He only acted like a lecher to keep Sango from thinking serious thoughts about a relationship with him. The usual chain events would happen: He would grope her, she would maim him, and then get in a huff, and immerse herself deeper in her thoughts of never being able to him.
Even though it clawed at him inside to push her away, (in a manner of speaking) it was definitely better than a few years of love, and then the crushing, inevitable heartbreak. Miroku knew she was one tough cookie, losing everyone she knew and still staying strong, but he feared that her heart just couldn't take it another time.
Although it hurt him inside to say so, he wanted her to be happy with another man, one that would take care of her the rest of her life. The poor boy realized firmly that love would never walk his way, so he might as well keep on doing anything to prevent any ugly situations from happening.
But, no one said he couldn't secretly admire Sango. Forget admire, it was full-blown love. No other girl had made him feel like the way he did when he was near Sango. It was a calming, blissful happiness, that washed thoughts of his doom away.
If it meant sacrificing his own happiness for Sango's, so be it.
%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*%*
In the last fading light, Sango came walking back from her long day visit to the hot springs. She figured after the fight, Kagome wouldn't be coming back very soon. The whole day, she was paranoid, constantly looking around to see if Miroku was watching like he usually did. But today, she surprised him.
She found no sign of him anywhere around the springs.
As she made it up to the top of the small hill, she spotted Miroku with his back against a jutting rock, quietly gazing up at the last of the sunset, wearing his usual emotion-missing mask.
"Hi Miroku." She said quietly. He didn't even seem to notice her presence. 'Hmm. The only time he looks like this is when he's thinking about his hand.'
Her thoughts were confirmed as he held up his cursed hand, turning it over and fingering the rosary beads.
She watched him smile, but of the bitterly sarcastic type, involving no humor whatsoever.
He then frowned, and his face relaxed, but went back to the mask he always wore.
A few more moments of silence, and he stirred, ready to leave. Sango shook her head sadly and continued along the path, heading for a quiet night's rest in Kaede's village.
When she heard him get up, she turned her head slightly to see him standing in the same spot, just staring up.
"So be it." She heard him mumble before he walked slowly past her, still obviously unaware of her.
'Wow..Miroku must be in a bad mood to not grope me..maybe I should be a little nicer to him.' She sighed deeply and continued once again along the path, ready for a little ramen and a good rest.
How did you like it? Yes? no? please review!! I know! This chapter was extremely boring, with no action. But I felt I had to set Inuyasha and Miroku's moods before I continued the story. And don't worry! The next chapter will get the plot moving nicely!
If I get enough reviews, I might get around to writing it!
Thanx to those 8 (still pitiful) who reviewed so far!