When I Don't Remember

By: Atsureki

Disclaimers : If I owned them you wouldn't be reading this!

Warnings : Yaoi, OCC, angst (as usual), probably should be more warnings but we'll leave it at this.

Notes : Stuff written in Italic are thoughts.

Chapter 16. Hunting

Omi waited for Yoji in the hospital's hall. He wasn't all that concerned about his team-mate's health since the wound hadn't been that deep but he was concerned about the mission. It had gone way too easy. Was it really Hattori they had killed or another imposter? Omi paced back and forth with a frown on his child-like face. It didn't really matter though, he just wanted to get away from the hospital and back to Ken. The brunette wouldn't sleep forever. //Hey kitten?// a voice suddenly asked in his head.
"Schuldig?" Omi frowned. //The one and only. Did you get rid of Hattori?// We killed two Hattori's. Let's just hope at least one of them was the real one, the blonde answered with annoyance. //FUCK! Did one of them act real stupid?// Omi raised an eyebrow. What kind of question was that? Um the second one sorta did. Why? //Good then my little thing worked. They were going to ambush you but I interfered,// the german chuckled inside the blonde's head. Where's Dean? It was quiet for a long time. //He's with Abyssinian. You might want to get a move on with our plans or there won't be much left here to save. Dean is getting restless.// Fuck. //Whoa didn't know you had such a dirty mind little kitten.// "Oh shut up," Omi said out loud and got a strange look from some of the nurses that past him by.

Ken rose from his bed and shook his head. It felt heavy and like it wasn't a part of him. Gently he placed the katana on the bed, not sure why he had it in his hands, and walked out from the bedroom. He might be disoriented but he wasn't stupid. Yoji had drugged him that much was obvious and that could only mean that the two blonde's were up to something. Slowly he made it to the kitchen and sank down on a chair, exhaused just from the short walk.
"Ran," he whimpered and hugged himself. "Ran, where are you?" For some reason he couldn't quite grasp where his lover was or what had happened to him. It felt like someone had pulled some of his memories out of his reach. Why did his heart hurt so much when he thought about Ran? Why was he so sad and broken inside? Ken didn't know and he was pretty sure he didn't want to know either. "Ran?" he called out and waited for that deep smooth voice to answer him. Not a sound except his own breathing and heartbeats. This was scaring him. "RAN!?" Still no reply. For some reason he started shaking and soon the tears poured down his cheeks. Where was his lover? Was he all alone? Ken rubbed his face and tried to calm down. He started backtracking his memories to find the answer to his questions. Dean had separated him from the others and tortured him. After that it was so fuzzy almost as if he had lost his memory all over again. 'Ran traded his life for yours,' Yoji's voice whispered inside his head. "Dean!" the brunette growled. So that green eyed bastard had Ran, well Ken would change that. Snarling in anger he stalked back upstairs to get dressed. Quickly he put on the clothes he usually wore during missions and grabbed his clawed gloves. Dean worked for the clan yakuza which probably meant that his lover was there too. The brunette also took Ran's katana with him before he hurried to his bike. "Hang on, I'm coming."

Ran snorted at Dean and still refused to eat anything. His body was healing but it got no help from the redhead. Sighing to himself he closed his eyes and thought of his lover. God how he missed Ken. He just needed to hear that soft voice, feel the brunette's touch, taste him again. But would he ever get the chance? Ran wasn't so sure. It still remained hidden just what Dean wanted with him and then there was Schuldig. The german had said some strange things to him and what they meant he had no idea. Dean on the other hand had stated that all he wanted was the information in Ran's head but he already had that so why didn't he either kill him or let him go? He still kept Schuldig away from the redhead too which was confusing. Annoyed he went back to thinking about Ken. How was the brunette doing? Not very good Ran guessed since his lover though he was dead. I'm not dead Ken. I wish I could just show you that I'm still alive. The pain and suffering the brunette must be going through made him want to cry. He had lost Ken once and he wouldn't wish that kind of hurt on anyone, friend or foe. With a deep sigh he sank deeper down into the pillow and glared at the green eyed man.
"Looks like your little friends actually managed to kill Hattori," Dean finally said and came closer. Ran raised an eyebrow but didn't comment. "I'm a little surprised though. Don't get me wrong I have no objetions about him being dead at all but… Hattori should have been able to finish off Blondie and Shorty. You're little kitten is out of action and can't even leave his or rather your bed." The redhead closed his eyes. Ken, he moaned inside and felt how the pain in his heart doubled. "I bet you are wondering why you're still here." Amethyst eyes opened again and glared. "It's Oyabun-sama. He's forbidden me to kill you or hand you over to Schuldig and I don't like it! Do you understand how frustrating this is?"
"Can't say that I do, can't say that I give a fuck either," Ran spat out and glared harder. "Well it makes me restless and annoyed. That is something you should give a fuck about," Dean growled and narrwed his green eyes.
"And why should I? I'm not gonna make it out of here alive either way." Dean laughed. "That remains to be seen kitten. If I get my way Schuldig will have you and I'm pretty sure you'd prefer to be dead." Ran rolled his eyes and went back to ignored the green eyed bastard again.

Schuldig frowned deeply and pulled his mind away from Dean's. He was in deep shit if he couldn't get Ran away from the yakuza. The deal he had made with Yoji and Omi stated that he had to give Ran back to them.
"Fuck!" the german exclaimed loudly and deepened his frown even more. "What I need is someone to kill Dean and I needed it like yesterday." He chewed on his lip and pondered. Of course he could kill Dean himself but he didn't want to mess with the yakuza. They knew him and they were too powerful for him even if he was a telepath. That was why he needed Weiß! If they killed Dean the yakuza would just shrug it off since they weren't all that happy with Dean in the first place. Kritiker was probably the only thing the yakuza worried about, they would not pick a fight with them at any cost. Suddenly Schuldig smiled slightly. "Ah but of course." Quickly he stretched his thoughts in search of someone who he was sure could help him with his little problem. "Found you kitten," he nodded and got to work. All he had to do was give up some information about Dean's location, play puppet master and everything should be fixed. When he was done the german sighed deeply. This would solve his problems but it didn't feel right. "I'm sorry I really am but there's no other way."

Ken was driving fast, recklessly but he didn't care. The only thing on his mind was was to find Ran. It was all that mattered to him. Without the silent redhead he was lost and alone and he couldn't stand it. With pure luck he avoided an accident. Something was going on in his head. It felt like someone was poking around in there and it was distracting him. Annoyed the bruentte shook his head to clear it, but the buzzing kept going. Without really understanding why he made a U-turn and sped off again. He had to go this way, why he had no idea but he just had to. Ken's mind was a mess but he knew that he had to get rid of someone who had hurt him, caused him pain. Confused and unsure he finally stopped his bike infront of a huge building. Like a puppet he got off the motorcycle and headed inside where he quickly got rid of four guards without even thinking. His feet lead him to the elevator and stepped inside. Almost as if he was on pause the brunette stared at the walls while the little box moved up and came to a halt. He trotted out into a corridore where he stopped to look around. More guards. Ken did away with them in the same mechanical way he had used on the men downstairs. They didn't stand a chance and the fight was short, brutal and messy. For a moment the clawed assassin froze since he didn't get any more instructions right away.

Ran's head snapped up at the same time as Dean's did. Amethyst and green eyes stared at Ken who suddenly was standing in the room.
"How the hell did you get in here?" Dean snarled and narrowed his eyes in anger. The brunette didn't answer he just stood there. Ran stared. That was not a normal look for his lover. Ken looked alien, his face was completely emotionless and his eyes blank.
"Ken?" he asked but the brown eyes never left Dean.
"You wanna fight kitten?" No answer, no movement. "Give it your best shot pretty boy. I'm sure you haven't forgotten what I did to you last time." The brunette didn't even flinch but he came closer. With no warning the two men suddenly charged each other. Ran's eyes widened. Dean was bigger and stronger than Ken but the brunette was possessed. He went for the green eyed man's face, cutting him across the cheek before he jumped back. As soon as he had stepped back he stopped moving again and just stared at nothing as if he was waiting for new orders. Dean wiped the blood from his face and snarled in anger. He moved forward and almost managed to hit the shorter man. Ken moved out of the way and then dashed forward again. He slashed with his claws and almost cut deeply into the much larger man's arm. Dean howled in pain, clutching his wounded right arm. The brunette took a few steps back and went back to staring into the air. It was obvious that the green eyed man was in a lot of pain but he refused to give up. Ran stared at his lover who now retracted his claws. Dean was on the move again but Ken didn't even blink. With fear he saw how his lover finally reacted and pulled out something from underneath his coat. The redhead frowned. That was his coat and the thing Ken held in his hands was his katana. The shiny metal reflected the sun as the brunette raised it high. Dean saw his chance and threw himself forward going for the brunette's unprotected stomach. Ran watched in horror as the big man suddenly froze. Ken had brought down his hands just in time and now Dean was stuck on the sharp blade, the tip sticking out through his back. For a long time nobody moved and then suddenly the brunette pushed back the green eyed man who fell to the floor with a disgusting thud.
"Ken," the redhead whispered. Brown eyes turned to him but they were still empty. "Ken are you okay?" Still no reaction.
"I'm sorry for using him Abyssinian but things were getting dangerous here." Ran snapped his head to the left and glared.
"Schuldig," he muttered darkly.
"The one and only," the german agreed and turned his green eyes to the body on the floor. "Nice job there Siberian. I must say that Dean looks so much better dead than he ever did alive." Ken slowly turned his head.
"What did you do to him?!"
"I had to use him to kill Dean before he killed you. I made a deal with Bombay and Balinese. My end of it said that I had to bring you back to Weiß so that's what I'm doing," the german answered slowly.
"I don't care about any deal! What did you do to Ken?!" Ran yelled and shot daggers at Schuldig.
"Easy there Abyssinian, I'll fix him. It's gonna be a shock for him but he'll be alright," the redhead promised. He narrowed his green eyes and concentrated. Moments later Ken let out a high-pitched scream and fell to his knees. "I'm sorry Siberian but I didn't have any other choice." Ran stared since it actually sounded like Schuldig meant that.
"Ken? Are you okay?" Unfocust brown eyes met concerned amethyst before Ken threw himself at the tall redhead.
"Ran!" The brunette buried his face against his lover's neck and sobbed loudly.

Ken's mind raced as Schuldig gave him access to all his memories again. The agony and pain from Ran's death came back with full force and almost sufficated him. But his lover was alive and his warm, secure body was close. The brunette almost tried to crawl underneath Ran's skin just to make absolutely sure he really was there.
"Calm down Ken, I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere," the redhead said softly and ran his fingers through Ken's hair.
"He's going to be fine," Schuldig mumbled quietly. "He was falling apart after he find out you were dead so I had to hide the memories he had from your death. I never meant to use him like this but Dean was getting restless and he wanted to kill you instead of handing you over to me. I'm sorry." Ken frowned but didn't lift his head to look at the german. He really sounded sorry about what he had done.
"What was in it for you?" Ran asked flatly and protectivly wrapped his arms around his lover.
"I won't lie and say that I got nothing out of this but I told you before Ran, don't be so quick when you decide who's good and who's bad," Schuldig said softly. "Just because we used to be enemies in the past it doesn't mean that I'm a total bastard." Green and amethyst eyes met for a moment and an understanding seemed to pass between them. "Say hi to the blondes from me." The german turned around and left the two lovers alone.

~TBC~

I think there'll only be one more chapter to this fic *nods* I think I've dragged this one out long enough, ne? Anyways, Schuldig is acting weird but um I don't really care. Ran and Ken are together again! Good boys! Let's see what I can whip up to wrap this up… Ja/Atsureki