Author's Note: Sorry about the wait. I've been busy with schoolwork &
stuff. I'll be posting more often now. And now, the glorious unveiling of
our new character and the relieving of your suspense!
Old (and sarcastic) Rival(s)
It was a man. Or at least, it appeared to be. One never could tell.
"Don't you recognize me, you fools?" said the stranger.
"No. Should we?" asked the mage.
"I'm the deranged diablolist who used to hound you back at the mage academy, elf. I used to lick your boots and practically beg for a glance from you. I can't believe what a pathetic dog I was. Then, it happened."
"What happened?" queried the dwarf.
"Don't interrupt me while I'm telling a tale of awakening! It's my duty as the 'fanboy-gone-psychotic-and-returned-to-haunt-my-idol' villain to tell you my personal history in soul-crunching detail! Now, back to the story. I was working on an experiment in the lab, trying to duplicate my idol Neltharion's experiments with on-the-fly item creation, when the experiment went horribly wrong. I was infused with greater magical power, and I became.Wizardman!"
"Do you realize how indescribably corny that is?!" Tabitha exclaimed. "You just invoked the most overused stereotype for a villain in the world of fantasy/superhero gaming! If you're going to be a villain in this adventure, at least pick an evil name. I mean, what the hell kind of a name is Wizardman? Go away, and don't bother to come back until you've picked a decent name for yourself. Also, get rid of the 'freakish lab accident' drill. That's something only a twisted madman like Stan Lee would use in a modern story."
"Really?"
"Really," said the elf.
The man(?) walked away without another word, and the rest of the group was gaping at Tabitha.
"What were ye thinkin', girl? Fer all ye knew, he coulda been a disguised dragon!"
"Puh-lease. With that kind of personality, he was either the villain I think he was or an actor who just got turned down for the X-men sequel."
Author's Note: Yes, I've started using anachronisms in my fics. I can't resist spicing it up with a bit of modern humor. It's my fic, and I'll do what I want with it. My Realms, my rules.
It was a man. Or at least, it appeared to be. One never could tell.
"Don't you recognize me, you fools?" said the stranger.
"No. Should we?" asked the mage.
"I'm the deranged diablolist who used to hound you back at the mage academy, elf. I used to lick your boots and practically beg for a glance from you. I can't believe what a pathetic dog I was. Then, it happened."
"What happened?" queried the dwarf.
"Don't interrupt me while I'm telling a tale of awakening! It's my duty as the 'fanboy-gone-psychotic-and-returned-to-haunt-my-idol' villain to tell you my personal history in soul-crunching detail! Now, back to the story. I was working on an experiment in the lab, trying to duplicate my idol Neltharion's experiments with on-the-fly item creation, when the experiment went horribly wrong. I was infused with greater magical power, and I became.Wizardman!"
"Do you realize how indescribably corny that is?!" Tabitha exclaimed. "You just invoked the most overused stereotype for a villain in the world of fantasy/superhero gaming! If you're going to be a villain in this adventure, at least pick an evil name. I mean, what the hell kind of a name is Wizardman? Go away, and don't bother to come back until you've picked a decent name for yourself. Also, get rid of the 'freakish lab accident' drill. That's something only a twisted madman like Stan Lee would use in a modern story."
"Really?"
"Really," said the elf.
The man(?) walked away without another word, and the rest of the group was gaping at Tabitha.
"What were ye thinkin', girl? Fer all ye knew, he coulda been a disguised dragon!"
"Puh-lease. With that kind of personality, he was either the villain I think he was or an actor who just got turned down for the X-men sequel."
Author's Note: Yes, I've started using anachronisms in my fics. I can't resist spicing it up with a bit of modern humor. It's my fic, and I'll do what I want with it. My Realms, my rules.