Hello, peoples! This chapter might surprise you. Boromir has a *gasp* GOOD idea! Perish the thought! As far as I know, addicted is the only one to review!!! Please, please, pretty please with sugar on top and little sprinkles shaped like Legolas, please review! *puppy dog face*

"Kiki?" Asked Boromir. "It will get cold the farther we go up, why don't we take a faggot of wood each?"

"Kiki! He said 'faggot'!" Bobby, being a typical boy raised in the USA, had his mind in the gutter. Kiki picked up a good-sized log and handed it to Bobby.

"Here's your faggot. Now don't loose it, we'll need it for a fire later. And get your mind out of the gutter." Kiki said, being…well, Kiki.

"Bill can take more, can't you Bill?" said Sam. The pony looked at him like he was saying 'You've got to be joking! Oh, well, I guess a few more pounds can't hurt.' Once everyone had a log, (Kiki grabbed two) they started heading to the mountain.

Three days later, the fellowship was freezing cold. The wind blew something awful. Kiki took the lead, muttering to herself. Aragorn, who walked just behind her, gave her a strange look.

"What are you saying, Lady Kiki?" He asked. He never just called her Kiki, always Lady Kiki.

"To be, or not to be: that is the question:

Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer

The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,

Or to take arms against a sea of troubles,

And by opposing end them? To die: to sleep;

No more; and by sleep to say we end

The heartache and the thousand natural shocks" Kiki blinked a few times, "William Shakespeare's Hamlet. I just got to the Soliloquy. It's a play." And she went on quoting.

The wind picked up and Frodo was lifted up into the air. Frodo grabbed Sam, who lost his grip on the wall and started flying, too. Sam grabbed Pippin, who grabbed Merry, who grabbed Bobby. The wind picked up again and Bobby grabbed Gimli. Jenny went flying off, through the air, screaming. Just as she passed the last of the line, Frodo grabbed her with his free hand.

The wind grew so bad that you couldn't look ahead. Gimli grabbed Gandalf, who grabbed Legolas, who grabbed Aragorn, who grabbed Kiki. Kiki had the wall in a death grip. She hardly realized the extra weight, though, for the wind supported everyone. She sank her nails into solid rock and pulled everyone forward. Reaching out one hand she grabbed wildly for a new rock. Near to falling, Kiki finally grabbed a rock. She held it with all her strength and brought her other hand up to it. They continued like this for a long time. Kiki could be heard chanting, "almost there, almost there!" as she groped her way up the mountain.

Kiki was beginning to despair of ever finding the shelter the book talked about when she passed out of the storm. Kiki pulled Aragorn in, who helped pull everyone else in. The wind had blown snow over the opposite side of the protruding stone. The hobbits huddled close together, and Bobby and Jenny went to their sister. Kiki was spread-eagled on the floor, not moving until Jenny came over.

"Kiki, I'm cold!" She whined. Kiki sat up, a little shakily, and hugged Jenny close. Bobby come over and was suddenly enveloped in Kiki's arms.

"Better?" Kiki asked. The pair nodded. "Good. Can I have everyone's wood?"

Every ones wood made a nice big fire. Kiki was so tired that she curled up next to the flame, wrapped herself in her cloak, and fell asleep. She held Jenny and Bobby close to her body, to keep them warm. A while later, Boromir moved to awaken her.

"No, Boromir!" whispered Aragorn "She has done us a great service today, let her sleep." Boromir knew he was no match for this ranger and let well enough alone. Legolas ended up cooking. The smell of burnt venison and well-done carrots filled the little alcove. Legolas wasn't doing a good job. What ever else he learned in his long life, cooking just wasn't one of those manly skills. He hummed a little elven tune as he worked, not really keeping his mind on his job. When the snow that was serving for water boiled over and the carrots were slightly blackened, Aragorn woke Kiki up with a bowl of hot stew.

"Thank you!" she exclaimed, before attacking her stew with vigor. "One *slurp* question: *gulp* Why are *chomp* you treating *slurp* me so *guzzle* well *crunch* nice?" she asked while trying to eat. As you can tell, it didn't quite work out to well.

"What did she say?" Asked Aragorn, clueless as to how to decode her speaking pattern.

"She said; 'One question: why are you treating me so, well, nice?'" Said Bobby. He'd only seen her eat like this after band practice. On those rare occasions you got her to say anything while eating in this state, she spoke between bites.

"Oh. Well, you did us a great service. You pulled the entire Fellowship up the mountain. That deserves some merit." Aragorn had been greatly impressed with the spider crawl up the mountain.

"Legolas?" asked Pippin "Did you have to hire a special teacher to learn to cook ~this~ badly?" The man acted like he didn't hear Pippin's comment, but he flushed a bright red.

"Now, now, children! Let's play nice…" She said, stuffing her face.

"Kiki's really hungry. Don't bother her." Said Jenny. Kiki was indeed hungry. She went back for four more helpings of the burnt stew, and lived.