Author's Note:
Sorry for the slow updates…I occasionally do this thing called "forgetting that the fanfic ever existed for almost two months".
This story may contain elements and scenes from other fan-fictions written by different authors. If you feel that your rights are being violated, don't hesitate to contact me. Thank you.
Of course, all of the Tekkaman/Dragonball characters/ideas that are not made up by me are property of their respective creators. I hope you enjoy this fiction.
Last time on Tekkaman Z!
The super Space Knights finally reached the humongous house of the greatest genius of all time—Bulma Briefs! Everything is going smoothly when Takaya's worst fears are realized—Bulma still hasn't trashed her teapot! Aki and Ringo wisely choose safer drinks, and Miyuki and Shinya use wily strategies, but Takaya is forced to take one for the team!
Meanwhile, the laughable Lance is fully healed! Determined to please his master, he is forced to enter the Parabolic Epoch Cabin to train hard and receive the awesome Ascendant Voltekker! But can he endure the trials of the nasty ninjas of the Oniwa Banshu?
And what's this? Jamison is slacking on the job, and with his trusty Playboy magazine, no less! But that's not all…doesn't that centerfold cutie look familiar?
Jamison: "Kore…korewa…!"
Can it be that the youngest of the Space Knights is a Playboy model? And what does she need to talk about with Jamison tonight in her room…?
Meanwhile, Bulma isn't going to help Miyuki for free…she's going to have to marry Trunks! Is the purple-haired punk that desperate for a girl? Will Reiko ever win the Lieutenant's heart? Will we ever learn exactly how she uses socks? Some of this, and more, today on…
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Tekkaman Z
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Episode 6: ...or Perhaps Not
By: Kajitani Eizan
Setting: Day 2, Around 11:00 AM, Omega's super-secret base on the far side of the moon.
Miyuki Meter: 52.5 hours remaining.
Omega's astral form finished meditating in the meditation room. He stood, immensely calmed by the soothing relaxation techniques that he had just performed. Walking towards the door, he mentally estimated how long it would take Lance to finish his training in the Parabolic Epoch Cabin.
Only five more minutes… he thought. Of course, that means that he won't actually finish until next month, or at least the middle of this episode. Oh well. No matter.
The Radam warlord attempted to open the door, but it did not budge. He frowned, then carefully inspected the control panel next to the door.
What the… he thought. This door is locked from the outside! Someone must be trying to foil my plans by locking me in! Treachery!
He pounded on the door with all his might, but to no avail. He fought to keep down the rising panic. Just stay calm, he thought. There has to be a way out…wait, I have an idea!
Omega, in a stroke of creative genius, phased through the door.
Damn, I keep forgetting that I'm in astral form…
***
Takaya's mouth hung open so wide that one could pass a prohibitive pile of pocket pita pizzas through it. Shinya, Miyuki, and Aki were in a similar situation.
"Well?" asked Bulma. "Do we have a deal?"
Aki exploded. "What?! You can't just expect Miyuki to marry Trunks! What about her feelings? Do you think she wants to marry Trunks?! Why don't you think about—"
Suddenly, the door burst open. A blond-haired young man ran through the door, kicked off his sneakers almost faster than the eye could see, and skidded into the enormous living room that the Space Knights and their happy hostess were in.
Miyuki, for one, had noted the way that he had turned the corner. Two-leg inertia drift, she thought with stars in her eyes. This guy is really good.
"Mom!" yelled the adolescent, who was in his late teens. It was obvious that he was very excited about something. "Goten and I were hanging out, and then he said we should try something new, and it made me feel—"
He stopped short when he saw the guests. "Oh, hi. My name's Trunks."
"Huh?" blurted Takaya. "I thought you were a 'purple-haired punk'!"
"…What are you talking about?" asked Ringo. "We've never heard anything much about him before. Have you got a box of cereal missing or something?"
"…" Shinya couldn't find an appropriate way to deftly debase Ringo.
"So, about your hair…" started Takaya.
"Well, I…um…" Trunks fumbled.
"He just dyed his hair," Bulma quickly supplied.
"You did…?" whispered Miyuki dreamily.
"Yeah," he said, turning to Miyuki. He unintentionally posed for a three-quarter profile shot, complete with gleaming smile, lame sparkles, and a cheesy background.
Miyuki blushed and felt her knees go weak. He's…he's… she thought, as 'love theme' music began to play.
"Is something the matter?" inquired a troubled Trunks.
I…I never felt this way before… thought Miyuki as she flushed red. I feel like…
"Okay, you can cut the sappy music," said Shinya.
Miyuki closed her eyes, fainted, and keeled over towards Trunks.
"Miyuki!" cried Aki and the Aiba twins in unison.
Trunks jumped back, letting Miyuki fell face first to the floor with a thud.
***
Omega finally arrived at the door to the Parabolic Epoch Cabin. It had taken him the better part of ten minutes to get there from the meditation room, even despite the relatively fast moving speed of his astral form. He peered into the view screen that allowed one to view the goings-on of the Cabin. He smiled, seeing that Lance's training for 'Operation: Body Unit Diversion' was almost at an end.
Just five more minutes… he thought.
***
Melders sighed as he turned a corner. He shuffled his papers around, trying to get them in order. He flushed with embarrassment at the memories of what had happened a few minutes before.
"Galt-sama," saluted Melders. "We have just received an update on the location of the enemy on the Space Ring."
"Good work, Melders," replied the glabrous General Galt of the Allied Military. His eyes looked distant; he was obviously meditating on some important matter.
"Sir?"
There was no response. Maybe he's asleep with his eyes open? guessed Melders. No way…Galt-sama would never do anything like sleeping on the job.
"Ah, sir?" repeated Melders. "Sir?"
Galt shook his head a bit as he came back to earth. "What? What were you saying?" He glanced down at the report in his hand.
Melders swallowed, slightly hydrating his suddenly dry throat. He licked his lips, gathering up his courage for his next question. This question might be all-important; it might change his life forever. I'm really nervous…he thought. No, I just can't do it…
Just fire the goddamn gun! screamed his conscience. …I mean, just say it!
Melders cleared his throat. "W, well, I, I was just asking, do you want to go out for lunch right now?" Sure, he may have stuttered, and the last part of his sentence came out a bit fast, but it got the message across.
Or so he thought.
Galt continued to look at the report. "No, not now."
Melders tried to contain his disappointment. "Yes, sir…" he saluted again before turning around and briskly walking out the door.
Melders sighed. Even though minutes had passed between then and now, his heavy disappointment weighed on his disposition like a dark shroud.
As he turned another corner, he saw a familiar figure cursing at a control panel.
"Goshdarn, dumb mother-fussing piece of dung!" she yelled as she pounded on the door controls. Well, her language was slightly more…abrasive, but…
"Try pressing that button before you enter your code," suggested Melders.
Startled, Reiko spun around to face Melders. She tried his suggestion, and the door slid open. "Thanks, Lieutenant."
"No problem, Akamatsu-san," replied Melders.
"So, Melders-kun," started Reiko. "Do you want to go out for lunch right now?"
Melders paused. He narrowed his eyes. "No, not now."
***
Bulma walked back into the room with a glass of water. "Is she okay?" she inquired. Takaya and Shinya were kneeling close to Miyuki, with Aki and Ringo sitting nearby. Trunks maintained a polite distance from Miyuki. He was staring off into space, his eyes slightly crossed.
"Yeah," said Takaya. "Although I don't know what's wrong with her. She usually never gets sick."
"Hmm…" mused Aki. "I'm sure she doesn't have a bacterial infection, since we gave her that heavy dose of antibiotics when she cut her legs while shaving."
"I swear I didn't convince her that using a hacksaw to shave would be a lot quicker and less painful! Honest!" exclaimed Shinya.
Everyone in the room gave him an odd look.
"Right, lad…I don't think it ken be a cold, either, since she didn't look sick to me," commented Mac.
"So why would she faint?" asked Shinya.
"Hmm…" thought Bulma. "Could it be…her Radam affliction?"
"No way," chimed in Ringo. "That's not for another fifty-plus hours!"
Just then, Miyuki began to stir. She opened her eyes.
"Miyuki-chan…" said Takaya. "Are you feeling better?"
"Yeah," she said, sitting up. "Must have been the heat or something." Yeah…Trunks is so hot that I passed out…
"Well, now that you're out of wonderland," said Bulma, "what do you say?"
"I guess I accept," Miyuki replied.
"Miyuki?!"
Trunks raised his eyebrow in suspicion. "Accept what?"
"She accepted my offer that she marry you in return for the treatment of her condition," replied Bulma.
"NANI?!" shouted Trunks. "Mom, you know that Goten and I—"
"Trunks!" said Bulma sharply, a warning look in her eyes.
"Goten and I had, uh…discussed this before…I'm…not sure I want to get married just yet," said Trunks. "You can't force me into marrying someone I don't like."
You…don't like me…? thought Miyuki.
"Oh, so is sweet Miyuki here so unlikable?" countered Bulma.
"No, that's not it," replied Trunks. Well, I guess otosan would say that she has a nice rack, so… "But…"
Oh, maybe it's just that he doesn't know me yet, thought Miyuki. I hope we can become friends…he's so dreamy!
"You had better give her a chance," said Bulma, "unless you want 'a little birdie' to let Vegita in on something that you might not want him—"
"Okay, okay!" said Trunks. "And I hope that Chichi doesn't know about—"
"About what?" asked Vegita. He had just come out of the shower and was wearing a certain pink shirt.
Trunks and Bulma froze. "Well," started Bulma. "Sit down, and I'll tell you. Want some water?" Bulma's brilliant brain raced to come up with a way to get out of this precarious predicament.
I've got a bad feeling about this, thought Vegita.
What is with that shirt…? thought the Space Knights.
"Hey everyone, would you mind heading outside for a minute?" asked Bulma. I think I can avoid telling him about Trunks' questionable relationship for now…
Mrs. Briefs, Bulma's mother, happened to walk by at that moment. "Ooh, guests!" she squealed. "Anyone want hot tea?"
***
Mmm… thought Shinya. This tea isn't half bad. In fact, I'd say it's pretty damn good.
Takaya, Miyuki, Aki, Ringo, and Mac sipped some of their tea, savoring its gentle goodness. Apparently, Bulma's mother was much better in the kitchen than Bulma.
"Thank you for the tea!" chorused the Aiba siblings. Aki, Ringo, and Mac nodded their heads in agreement.
"You're welcome!" squealed Mrs. Briefs. "Anyway, I have to go water the garden now, so just feel free to wander off or whatever!" She walked off to another part of the enormous grounds.
"Right," said Aki as they all wandered their separate ways.
***
Galt checked his watch. "Hmm, it's time for lunch," he noted. He suddenly remembered his recent exchange with Melders.
"Galt-sama," saluted Melders. "We have just received an update on the location of the enemy on the Space Ring."
"Good work, Melders," replied Galt. Soon, he thought, I will finish my plan to destroy those alien freaks and will become the greatest hero of the human race! And the Tekkaman will be at my side, my forever loyal servant…
"Ah, sir?" repeated Melders. "Sir?"
Galt snapped out of his reverie. "What? What were you saying?" He glanced down at the report in his hand.
Melders paused for a moment, then cleared his throat. "W, well, I, I was just asking, do you want to go out for lunch right now?"
Galt continued to look at the report, skimming it for specific details of the enemy's positions, not really listening to Melders. "No, not now." Hmm…it would seem that any plan to defeat the enemy would involve those accursed Space Knights…why is my military so darn incompetent…?
"Yes, sir," Melders saluted again before turning around and briskly walking out the door.
"Damn!" said Galt. "I should have accepted his offer. Now I might have to buy my own lunch!"
As he walked out the door, he glanced back over his shoulder to the picture of Blade on his desk. Soon, Tekkaman…
***
"Nnngh!" grunted Takaya as he swung his racket as hard as he could. It solidly connected with the ball, sending the ball flying over the net at a high speed. As a matter of fact, the speed as a function of time can be approximated by the Maclaurin series—
"Thank you for the insightful—nngh!—commentary," interrupted Ringo. He had just barely managed to reach the ball in time to deflect it back at his opponent. "You know what, Takaya?"
"What?" Takaya asked as he hit the ball back to Ringo.
"I know for sure that Aki—haa!—really likes you," said Ringo. "And that you like her back."
"Congratulations on your astute observation," replied Takaya.
"So why are you shunning her? I mean, jeez, maybe a day ago you two were sc—"
"Scheduled to go on toilet duty," cut in Takaya.
"Riight…" said Ringo with a smirk. "So what happened?"
"Well…Ringo, I suspect that she's cheating on me."
Red crept up Ringo's neck. "N, no way! She wouldn't do that! She likes you too much for that!"
Takaya narrowed his eyes as he smacked the ball so hard that Ringo was unable to reach it in time.
"Good shot, hotshot," said Ringo. "You nearly dented the wall."
"Sorry," replied Takaya. "It's just that…I have this weird suspicion that she's cheating on me…hell, she could even be cheating on me right now…"
***
"Ohhh…yes…yes…"
"Ohh God Kisaragi, I love how you clench—AAH!" The raven-haired man reached the apogee of his roller-coaster ride of pleasure and let out a long moan of bliss.
The two lovers rested for a long minute, a brief hour, entwined in each others' arms.
"We had better go before someone gets suspicious."
"Right…"
***
"…and that's how I tried to hook him and Miyuki up," finished Bulma.
"Well…" said Vegita. "Whatever. It's cool with me." That wasn't bad at all…but why is my ki sense acting up…?
"Rad, bro!" shouted Krillin.
"Shut up, baldy!"
"…Why are you here?"
Whew… said Trunks. 'Kaasan weaseled her way outta this one, but how long can I hide it from otosan? And I sure hope that Goku, Gohan, and Goten-chan all kept their mouths shut around Chichi…
***
"Goten-chan…?" muttered Takaya as he wiped his brow with a sweat towel.
"What?" asked Ringo. He returned his racket and the ball to their rightful places in the equipment rack.
"…Nothing."
"Anyway," said Ringo, "let's go check up on Bulma. My ESP tells me that they're done with their little talk."
"You mean, you just saw Trunks wave to us from outside the window."
"Er…that's what I said. Yeah."
***
The halls were relatively deserted. They usually were; most people didn't randomly wander around the living quarters.
Jamison, Commander of the Space Knights, was not representative of most people.
He idly wandered down the hall, Scientific American/Playboy in hand, meditating on the day's events. Actually, not much had happened yet; it was only noon. Well, one thing had happened. Jamison's ears flushed when he recalled Tina's appearance in his favorite magazine and her subsequent proposition.
I still can't believe it… thought Jamison. Suddenly, he bumped into somebody, interrupting his thoughts.
"Oops, sorry," apologized Jamison. "I was just preoccupied with my duties as a commander and—"
He realized that he was right in front of Tina's room.
And in front of him, on the floor, was Tina herself, brushing herself off and cutely blinking those cute eyes in a cute way. She's so cute—
"Oh no, Commander, I'm the one that should be sorry. I wasn't quite looking where I was going," replied Tina. She paused and blushed a bit. "Well, actually, I was thinking, since I'm on break right now, and you don't seem to be too busy, can we…talk?"
Jamison's brain froze. He quickly scrambled for an intelligent thing to say, and found the closest equivalent that he could manage for the time being. "Guh…what?"
Tina smiled at him and gestured towards her room. "You know, instead of tonight…can we talk now?"
Jamison tried to reply, but she was already leading him by the hand into the opened door of her room.
I hope I don't do something I'll regret… he thought shakily.
***
"Okay," said Bulma. Everyone had gathered in Bulma's spacious living room. Aki sat on the couch next to Miyuki, with Takaya on his sick sister's other side. Shinya and Mac sat together on the loveseat. Bulma, Trunks, and Vegita sat on another couch, Trunks leaning back and generally looking cool, and Vegita doing the same with his arms crossed. Ringo chose to lean against the wall.
"Now that you've agreed to my proposal," said Bulma, nodding her head at Miyuki, "I can cure Miyuki."
Mac shifted from one thigh to the other, wishing that Bathroom #5L was closer than it actually was. Shinya discreetly shifted away from him.
"Well, I'm pretty sure I can cure Miyuki, anyway," said Bulma. "I calculated that the probability of it working—"
"I'm sorry, Bulma," cut in Takaya, "but we haven't got the time."
"We only have fifty-one and a half hours left," added Miyuki.
"Ken we please get ta the point, lass?" asked Mac. Vegita's eyebrow twitched. He shot a dark look at Mac.
"…Yes, as I was saying," continued Bulma, "I can cure Miyuki. But first—"
Everyone groaned loudly.
"It's not that bad! I swear!" said Bulma.
Shinya swore.
"You just need to gather the seven dragonballs first," said Bulma. "They're in random locations around the world, but I'm sure you can find them all in fifty hours."
"Goddamn…" muttered Takaya. "Okay, what do they look like?"
"I'll show you," said Bulma. "Trunks, could you go down to Storage #5L and bring back the gray box there?"
"Sure," said Trunks. He walked off.
Mac was struggling to press his bottom together tighter. The mention of 5L, however, was too much—the pressure was too high. Luckily, it was silent as a black panther—unseen, unheard—but deadly.
"Is something wrong, pale boy?" sneered Vegita. It wasn't as strong where he sat, but he could guess at the severity of Shinya's predicament.
Shinya finally gave in to the merciful forces that pressured him to surrender his consciousness. He keeled forward and hit his head on the coffee table.
"Safety," muttered Mac.
***
"Lance," boomed Omega's powerful voice. "Report."
Lance limped over to the video console near the entrance to the Parabolic Epoch Cabin. "Sir…I feel horrible. And I haven't even gotten close to learning the Ascendant Voltekker."
"Look at it this way, Lance. It might have been worse."
Lance was perplexed. "How? I was sodomized by four muscular ninjas for hours on end!"
"Your oral orifice might have been invaded as well."
"…"
"Um…well, look at the bright side. At least they were faithful; it's not like they cheated on you."
"Actually, I seem to recall—"
"As I was saying," boomed Omega, "your trials are over. I will now bestow the Ascendant Voltekker upon you!"
Suddenly, pink vines shot up out of the ground and encased Lance within. Lance's armor disintegrated as the vines formed a crystal-shaped bubble around his body. He screamed in exhilaration as his body was pumped with energy. He felt strong enough to defeat Saber! He felt alive! He felt powerful! He could finally kill Blade!
"TEK-SETTA!!" he screamed, causing his brownish armor to reform itself over his body. The pink vines exploded, leaving him standing, pink fluids dribbling off of his mouth and chin and running down his legs. He generated his lance and turned in the direction of the four naughty ninjas.
"Oniwa Banshu," he sneered with an evil glint in his eye, "It's payback time…"
He opened the new Voltekker cells on his stomach and shoulders. They glowed with muddy-orange energy, illuminating Lance's armor, casting a fiendish light on his person.
"MOERU!!" (Burn!!)
***
"I'm just so glad that you saw my article!" gushed Tina. "Now you know what I'm capable of, right?"
Jamison finally found his voice. "But…but, aren't you just fifteen?"
Tina nodded. "Well, yeah, but age doesn't matter…it's skill that counts!"
"I…I can't…" managed Jamison. "You're just a kid…"
Tina pouted. "Don't say that! Just because I'm under eighteen, it doesn't mean that I don't know what I want! All the time, it's 'Tina, don't do this,' or 'Tina, you aren't ready for that!' I don't care, I just wanna do it!"
Jamison's 'mini-me' finally gained precedence over his brain. He snapped and dived at her.
"Whoa, wait, Commander," laughed Tina. "Even if you're that enthusiastic, please calm down just a bit."
Jamison mentally slapped himself. What am I doing? he thought. At the very least, I should take this one step at a time. No, wait. I just cannot do this. I'm the Commander here…what if someone found out? Okay, it's decided…much as I'd like to have a go with her, I won't.
Jamison got off of her, then headed for the door. "I'm sorry, Tina, but I've reconsidered. I refuse your offer."
Jamison's rejection hit Tina like a load of bricks. "B, but…you know how much I want this! How much I need this! Please, Commander!"
"No." He opened the door.
"Please, it's just one signature! Just one! Please, I swear, I'll never ask for anything ever again!"
Jamison froze. A signature? What…?
"Ever since I won that science competition, they've asked me to go to the United Earth Allied Institute of Technology's summer course! I always wanted to go, but there was no one to replace me! Now, there's that new girl! She can take over for me! I'll only be away for a month! Please! This means a lot to me! I know it's very challenging, and it's intended for people eighteen and up, but I know I can handle it! And since you're technically my guardian, I can't use anyone else's signature to go!"
With a flash, all became clear to Jamison. The issue of Scientific American! She thought I saw an article about her in Scientific American, not Playboy! They must have announced the contest winners in this issue, and she thought I saw her name in it, and…
Quickly, he grabbed the magazine off of his desk and thumbed through the appropriate part of it. He found the article and scanned through it. Sure enough, Tina's face smiled back at him from the pages of the magazine. She was the first place winner of the UEAIT Science Competition!
Well, that explains that… he said. But wait…who was that in Playboy?!
He flipped over to the centerfold of Playboy and looked at it, painfully aware of 'mini-me' competing for his attention. What? It says 'Tina Corman, cute winner of the UEAIT Science Competition' there at the bottom. Wait! There, at the neck…a line! I've been studying every bit of Tina since this morning, and she doesn't have a line there! Damn! This pic was Photoshopped! Goddamnit!
"Please, sir!"
Jamison looked up at her and smiled. Wow, was I a dumbass… thought Jamison. "Tina, I've decided to give you the signature."
Tina squealed in delight. "Thank you, sir! Thank you!" She jumped up and down around her room.
"Right…um…I have to go now," said Jamison. "Report to the command room at 1300 hours." He walked out the door.
Whew… thought Jamison. Another possible reason for arrest put to rest…
"Yay! I'm going to UEAIT! I'm going to UEAIT!" shouted Tina. She flopped down onto her bed. Hmm…I felt so weird when the Commander jumped onto me…I think…I might like him…
***
"Okay, here's the box," said Trunks. He dropped a large box onto the floor.
That's odd… thought Miyuki. He's back really quickly…but wow, he's soo dreamy!
Bulma pressed her palm against one side of the box.
"Fingerprint and palmprint verification successful," droned the box. "Enter password."
"What password?!" Bulma blurted. Everyone groaned.
"Just kidding," droned the box. "Voice sample verification successful. Unlocking now."
An audible click was heard, and Bulma reached into the box and pulled two objects out of the protective padding. One was a disc-shaped object, about the size of a palm, with what appeared to be a circular green screen on one side. A stopwatch-like button adorned the side of the disc. The other object was a perfectly round translucent orange sphere. It appeared to have four darker orange stars embedded somewhere inside its confines.
"This," said Bulma, pointing to the sphere, "is a dragonball. You need to collect all seven of them to…um…help me to cure Miyuki. This," she said, pointing to the disc, "is a Dragon Radar. You can use it to find the other dragonballs. When you press the button, it'll cycle through its various modes."
She pressed the button. "See, here, there's a '1' at the center of the screen. This shows that there's one dragonball at that spot. That would be the four-star one, here."
"Wow, lass," said Mac, amazed by the Radar. "How does that work? Does it pick up some kinda signal emitted by these dragon's balls?"
"Yes…" replied Bulma. "You could say that."
"That sounds odd," said Aki. "How does that make any sense? What kind of unusual electromagnetic wave could these balls possibly be omitting that makes them so easy to distinguish from other signals? And if these waves are so rare, wouldn't they be gamma rays or something that would cause us extreme harm?"
"No," said Bulma hastily. "Moving on, I'm entrusting these two babies to you three. Takaya, Shinya, Miyuki…don't break the Radar. It's a bitch to fix. And whatever you do, don't let the dragonballs fall into the wrong hands. They can cause insurmountable trouble if they do."
"Right…" said Takaya. "I don't get how these Pyrex marbles are gonna help cure Miyuki, or how they can cause any trouble in the wrong hands, but…"
"Just think about it," said Ringo. "Balls in the wrong hands at the wrong time has caused lots of trouble before!"
"Yeah!" said Shinya. "Anyway, let's go search for the dragonballs!"
"Thanks for everything, Bulma!" said Takaya. Everyone nodded and made similar statements.
"And…bye, Trunks…" said Miyuki. "Seeya later."
"Um…" said Trunks. "You, too. I guess."
And so, the quest begins… thought Bulma as everyone made their way back to the Blue Earth. Damn, I wish Trunks were less gynephobic…
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Next time on Tekkaman Z!
The quest is on, and the gang is going for dragonball number two! Meanwhile, Trunks is going for Goten! Not to mention that Reiko is going for Melders, Melders is going for Galt, and Galt is going for Blade! But who's this new adversary?
Man in the shadows: "Ore wa…"
You don't to miss this special adventure, next time on Tekkaman Z!
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End Chapter 6
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