Ch. 2: Lucky Dog
In which your intrepid author attempts technobabble and Porthos makes an appearance.
"I think you should confine yourself to your quarters for the next two days," Phlox said. He had been scanning her and taking samples for three hours after she got out of decon. "Apparently the eshthist glands around the Ulnerian mouth secrete a concentrated form of pheromones. They absorbed into your skin and stimulated your own pheromonal production. In short, you are emitting the highest level of pheromones I have ever observed in a human. I believe I have had some success in combating this, but you won't be back to normal for at least two days."
"And I can't work? I don't feel any different."
"You may not, but your crewmates will. Your presence may cause disruption and tension among them. They will respond to your pheromones and react at an exaggerated level."
"You mean, people who wouldn't ordinarily be interested in me... intimately... will be?" she said, thinking about Trip asking her out.
"Precisely," Phlox said, "I am giving you medical leave for the next two days. I would suggest you spend it with minimal interaction with the rest of the crew. I can arrange to have meals brought to your quarters, if you like." Hoshi clapped her hands to her face, hiding her eyes.
"Okay," she said, "there isn't any way not to tell the others about this, is there?"
"I will be the soul of discretion," Phlox said. "Is that by any chance a new garment you are wearing? The colors are most flattering." Hoshi looked down at her regulation tank top.
"I'll be in my quarters," she said.
Hoshi stepped out of the shower and dressed for bed, tee and sweats. She was combing out her hair when the door chimed. "Yes?" she called and Trip walked in.
"I heard you were out sick," he said, "I brought you some chicken soup and soda crackers." He set his tray down on the desk, paused a moment, and sat in her chair.
"Thanks," she said, "but I don't think you should stay. I could... give you something."
"I'm healthy as an ox," he replied, "I'm not afraid of some alien bug."
"All the same," she said, "I should probably get some rest." She stood by the door and opened it. Malcolm was standing on the other side, just about to ring the chime. "Malcolm," she said. Great. The one guy on the ship she wouldn't mind attracting some extra attention from, and it was only going to happen because of some Ulnirian friendship spit.
"Hoshi," he said, clearing his throat, "I heard you were ill. I-- I brought you a copy of Infiltration. It's a strategy game. Ah, quite good for passing the time when you're sick."
"Something you'd know a lot about, Lieutenant?" Trip said, still seated at her desk.
"Commander," Malcolm stepped into the room, "I didn't notice you there."
"Maybe you should notice this: Hoshi has company and doesn't need to be disturbed." Trip glared at Malcolm. Limey bastard. Malcolm glared at Trip. Fuckwit hillbilly. Malcolm opened his mouth to respond.
"Maybe you both should leave," Hoshi broke in, "I really need to get some rest." She was about to open the door when the doctor arrived.
"Ensign, what are you doing entertaining? You should be alone. I don't want to have to issue an official quarantine... and might I say that shade of blue is delightful!" He was staring at her tee shirt.
Phlox was followed in short time by Travis (with a humorous novel), Ensign Mars from across the hall, two crewmen from the Armory (quickly scared off by Malcolm), and Chef (with a special dish). When the door chimed again Hoshi yelled, "who the hell is it this time?"
"Hoshi... It's Captain Archer."
"Thank goodness," she said, "can you order everyone to leave?" She sat slumped on the edge of her bed. Archer walked in, Porthos in tow. The dog sniffed. The female smelled good! Almost as good as cheese! Porthos ran over to Hoshi's bed and flopped next to her, resting his head on her lap. Everyone in the room stared at him thinking the same thing: lucky dog.
"I just stopped by to say I hope you're feeling better," Archer said, "I wouldn't want anything to happen to my most beautiful crew member." He sat next to her and touched her hair.
"That's it!" Hoshi stood up abruptly. "Doctor, will you please explain to everyone that they're acting this way because of some strange glandular stuff, not because of anything real?" The doctor was examining the contents of her shirt drawer and barely looked up. "Argh!" Hoshi yelled and ducked out door, trying to jam it shut.
"This might do the trick," she heard Malcolm's voice behind her. He used his security code to lockdown her quarters. "We'd better go," he said, "the Captain can override my lockdown, when he thinks of it." Hoshi followed him down the corridor.
"Malcolm," she said, "maybe I should go to T'Pol's quarters." She tried not to think about what the Vulcan would say about her predicament.
"We'll go to mine," he said, clearing his throat, "I can lock them from the inside and no one will be able to get in. Now what's all this about some strange glandular stuff?"