Author: Brandi Vincent
Disclaimer: This is the sequel to Demon Beneath My Will; I do not own any of J.K. Rowling's characters except for Shane Pompe, Eddie, Joey, and Rick.
Summary: Thanks to the suggestion of a reader, I'm putting what had happened last chapter as well. I had forgotten to do that, thanks! Anyway, they had gotten to London finally Chapter Six and Tom Riddle's spell had begun. It holds a steady beat in Chapter Seven, as new emotions are conducted. (Gawd, I make it sound like a fucking weather report.)
~~~Chapter 7: Closer~~~
Eddie kept rapping his own 'unique' lyrics about how fruity Joey was, and Rick kept instigating fights with the jocks as Shane tried breaking the arguments and fusses up between them all. Hermione had nodded off to sleep in Draco's warm and protective arms.
Ron and Professor Lupin had tired out their game of run-around-Professor-Snape-with-a-snowball and decided it best to bombard Harry with icicles.
Draco refrained himself from looking down at Hermione's bright cheeks and full chest and tried focusing on something a little more attentive. Which happened to be Eddie 'cussing out' Joey. They were practically the best of friends, but they never liked to note on anything positive on the other.
"Joey, you gotta stop wearing those alien shirts, dude, they're freaking me out," Eddie shuddered, and not from the cold. "And stop giving me that look like you wanna fuck me!"
Joey stared at Eddie with a smirk, as Rick walked between the two. "You wanna know a secret?" Rick asked Eddie, throwing his arm around Eddie's neck. He looked at Rick weirdly, as Rick leaned forward and whispered something into his ear.
Eddie glanced over at Joey and jumped back, "I knew it! How'd I know it? I knew it!"
"That's it," Draco mumbled under his breath, puffing out little balls of smoke from the intoxicating air, "I can't stand these people. How they managed to get a B average is beyond me."
He looked over his shoulder after hearing a yelp of pain pierce the cold air. The jock and Shane were now fighting, and it did not look pretty. Draco smiled then, suddenly cheered up. "It's funny when the people you despise get hurt."
"Yea, but it's even funnier when friends get hurt," Eddie replied, butting into what Draco had to say. Right then, Rick was chuckling like a reclusive idiot and didn't see the tall black pole in front of him. Funny and ironic how most people as dense as Rick got anywhere as far as avoiding a pole clearly in front of your twisted face.
~~~~~~
Lucius fell far behind, watching the crowd from a midst. He smirked to himself as he saw Draco cradling that filthy mudblood in his broad Malfoy arms.
Wonder if she still has that scar, he thought elegantly to himself. Funny how this entire mess started with that girl. I'm sure if I hadn't threatened her life, Draco would still be frustrating at Voldemort's side and everything would be right with the world. Or more of: his world.
He liked to think of himself as a hero protecting wizards, warlocks, and witches, but nobody seemed to appreciate his work. Pity, too, since they'd all have to pay for it in the end.
Tom dropped even farther behind with a midnight blue cloak hanging over his head and draping over his body, not a speck of skin baring under it.
Lucius smirked again, clock hung over his head but still held a shadow over his eyes to allow him to look ahead. Silly boy held such affection for that silly girl, yet refused to even glance at her. But he knew Draco knew the game; he would get quite horny whenever even looking at her and how he managed to hold her was a shock to him.
He looked back over to Tom, and chuckled. Even though his Lord was yards away, he could tell he was chuckling to himself as well. Nevertheless, they'd soon enough walk into the hotel and check in, where Lucius was only rooms away from Draco, and none of them would never even know.
The world was getting entirely too intoxicating with the idiots it was surrounded and crowded with.
The pack of seventh years soon crowded around a tall, white four star building that seemed to be stories tall. Tom and Lucius stopped abruptly, each ducking behind a tall black pole to avoid being seen or recognized by anyone of the crowd.
"Listen up, ladies and gentlemen!" Professor Lupin announced, shooting his arms in the cold, brisk air to halt the talkative teenagers as they stopped outside the lobby. "Stick with your partners and remember your manners! This is a four star hotel, so no trickery or rude remarks! Any fools can't handle that, please step aside!"
Looking about, Eddie stepped away from the crowd, and Rick began pointing and laughing. Joey pushed him towards Eddie, and he stopped snickering.
"Do we get a special room, then since we can't handle ourselves?" Eddie asked, as Rick looked around, dumfounded.
"Yes, you do actually," Lupin smiled as Professor Snape and Professor Figgs stood firmly next to him, "You get the love suit. Just for you two love birds!"
Eddie looked at Rick in disgust, and dodged back into the crowd, "You're low, Professor Lupin!"
Draco rolled his eyes at the few jokes Eddie made and scooted Hermione farther into his arms and held her away from the snpw, as too not further her shivering. Soon enough, they entered the hotel and checked into their rooms where they would be free to do as they pleased. Hermione slept on as Draco and others entered the elevator to go to the third floor. Eddie and the gang, apparently, were in the elevator with them shoving each other around to claim the space next to the numbers and buttons.
"Second floor, please," Rick asked Eddie who won the position in a 'fancy' manner, as Eddie pushed the number two on the wall. "Thank you," Rick thanked sarcastically.
"You are quite welcome," Eddie replied, imitating the same manner.
"Is our room even on the second floor?" Joey asked as Shane rolled his eyes with a sigh.
"No, sir," Eddie replied with the same accent as before.
"Third floor, please," Rick added, remembering their floor. Eddie did so and they thanked each other.
"Fifth floor, please," a man that came onto the elevator from the second floor asked.
"Oh, so you're gonna go and diss my mama like that?" Eddie ganged up on the man as Rick coed and cheered him on. Draco rolled his eyes again and pushed the number five to get it over with as the man continued to be in a state of confusion.
The third floor opened and the belittled man dashed off before Draco could, shouting behind him "Idiots!" Draco and everyone else besides Eddie stepped off, with Eddie saying he was going to stay on a few more minutes to make sure it was 'working correctly'.
Draco found his room, which seemed to be right next to they. Fumbling for the key card he had been given, he slid it through the lock and opened the door, leading to a pleasantly fine suite with white cascading walls, carpet, and master bed. It suited him, but he much appreciated his black and gloomy bedroom at home better. Just as he closed the door behind him, he caught a glimpse of Eddie running down the plain red halls, being chased by a doorman who cursed along the run at him.
Shaking his head, Draco closed the door all the way and faced the rest of the room. Carrying Hermione around all night hadn't tired his arms especially, but made him grow weary. Laying Hermione down on the master bed gently, he turned towards the bathroom door and entered to get ready to sleep. Honestly, he would just flop onto his bed and rest away without bathing or changing into a near pair of clothes, and heck, didn't even bother getting under the covers. But this time he was sleeping in the same bed as Hermione again and he didn't want her to suffer with his body odor.
His old dogs liked the smell, but he didn't think Hermione would appreciate it much. Staring up into the mirror, he saw a miserable fool staring back at him, angry and tired, which he usually was. Pulling off his wet robe and black shirt, he remembered his suitcases for a new one. Opening the door slightly, he poked his head out and looked around, but saw no suitcase in clear sight. They probably hadn't brought it up yet. Sighing he closed the door again and faced the sink, splashing some cold water onto his already cold and wet face, he grabbed one of the petite white towels that come with the room and washed it off. Deciding who gives a shit about the rest, he threw the small towel onto the rug of the bathroom and called it a night, not even bothering to slip off his combat boots. He never had whenever he would sleep in the first place.
Opening the covers, he pulled them over Hermione's shivering body and himself, keeping some distance between her and his throbbing groin. He would have masturbated as well like he always would right before he'd fall asleep, and the mood seemed right, but if Hermione had caught him in the act that knew what would have happened? Somewhere inside of him said who cares, but he stayed civilized and slept away, clutching his bare chest not out of coldness, but of emptiness.
He was just another spec of dust in the universe, and that's how it would stay. But the odd thing was, he didn't care.
~~~~~~
Hermione was a virgin, or was she? She liked to question that a lot, since the thoughts, which endured her mind often, were sexual and exotic, which led to her masturbating her night before she went to bed. She had been doing that about every night ever since she saw James Marsters make his star appearance on Buffy the Vampire Slayer years back. (BN: OK! I like BtVS! Happy now?!? But I never intentionally tried making the story line or some parts like it, and after I write it or think it up, I wonder dammit, it sounds too much like episode number whatever!)
But this dream blew them all away, surprisingly. Out of all of the erotic dreams she has had with actors; even one where she was in Halloween Town making out on Jack Skellington's bed; this one topped them off. She woke up sweating and shocked, but it wasn't so disturbing. It was back in her third year and she had slapped Draco. In her dream she was about to storm off, but then he grabbed her wrist sharply and yanked her towards him again, catching her off guard.
His nostrils flared and his grey eyes pierced into hers as Crabbe and Goyle guarded Harry and Ron off. She glared right back, not afraid anymore to rebel against the rebel.
"Did you think you could get away with a stunt like that, Granger?" He hissed, in perfect thirteen-year-old form.
"I guess not, now," was all she could retort, searching for a better come back in her mind. She tried yanking away, screeching for him to let go, but he held a firm grip. Even in her dreams she was weak against him. That's it, she was going to take up martial arts.
"Glad to see you know your place," he growled back, throwing her against the stone wall, now holding her both of her wrists above her flushed head of hair. Pressing his body up against hers, he held her wrists with one tight hand and began groping her body with his other.
"What are you doing, Malfoy?!" She hollered, trying to wriggle free from his towering body and weight.
"Shut-up, you filthy mudblood," he scowled, tightening his strained grip around her feeble wrists as she winced in further pain. Slipping his spare hand up her shirt, he smirked at her sadistically and licked his faint pink lips lightly as she stared at him in horror. Maybe she's not afraid of the rebel, but she is afraid of the sex crazy god in him.
He smashed his lips onto hers suddenly and forced his slithering tongue into her mouth. She could faintly hear Harry and Ron's muffled screams, but that was all, except for the panting. Then everything went white, and she wasn't even sure if it was what she thought it was.
And then all of a sudden, she was making out with the up-to-date Draco on a cold white floor in a still white room with plain white walls. He was on top of her, but like a dream the scenery and details were blurry. All she knew was that he was on top of her, panting, and a pleasuring sensation between her legs. Very pleasuring.
"I'm going to scar you for life, Granger," He whispered into her ear, flicking his tongue around her lobe.
Then she snapped back to reality, confused. Was that the same room she had dreamt about with Draco long ago, or was it by mere coincidence? And did he say he was going to scar her for life?
Hermione tossed over in the warm bed and kicked Draco square in his shin, almost shoving him off the bed. He snapped his eyes open and rolled over to face her, brows furrowed groggily and confused.
"Did you just kick me intentionally?" He asked, cocking an eyebrow as he stared at fuming Hermione.
"Yea, you were being a bastard!" She claimed, slowly realizing it was just a twisted dream. She left out a lot of...other stuff as she confirmed herself about it.
"You just woke up," he shook his head in a groggy state and continued to stare at her bluntly.
"Never mind," Hermione finally shook her head as well, resting her head back down on the feathery pillow. "When did we get here?"
"A while ago," Draco groaned sleepily, looking over to the side table to check the digital clock. "Damn, it's only one a.m."
"Mama!" A familiar voice hollered down the hall as the pounding of steps drew down the long hallway of the hotel. "This is a hate crime! Mama!"
"Get back here!" A briskly voice shouted back, as Hermione curiously and slowly walked over to the door.
"When has that ever stopped anyone?" Eddie replied, beginning to bang on the door his other friends were in. "Let me in! Fuck you too, man!"
Right as Hermione cracked open the door, he bustled through, breathless, and slammed the door behind him as she stood back. The heavy footsteps of an obese man drew near and his big meaty fists began pounding on the clean white door.
"Open up!" He yelled through the door as Hermione cocked a brow at breathless and cackling Eddie.
"When has dat obliged a brotha to open the fuckin' door?" Eddie asked with a slight edge in his voice. The pounding stopped instinctively, and was replaced with the thick yell of an overweight security guard.
"You better start packing, because you're out of here by morning! All of you!" He huffed, panting from running and began trotting back down the hall with a short breath.
Eddie's eyes widened and he flung the door back open to retort, "Oh yea? Yo mama!"
"What did you say?" The fat security guard turned around, nostrils flaring.
"I said 'Yo mama!'" Eddie shouted back, "Whatch you gonna do about it, Moby Dickass?" He closed the door shut as the obese man began waddling back over to the door. Eddie cackled to the door in a heave and wiped the sweat off of his forehead, turning around to face the two other bewildered teenagers. "So, whas crackelackin, hommies?"
"What the hell?" Draco cocked an eye brow, supporting his weight on his elbows that were resting on the bed behind him.
"Yo, catch this, I was all bein' a gentleman, you know, helpin' the nice people of dis hotel on the elevator, catch what I'm sayin'? And this fat old man with flub hangin' out of his gut tries to get me to act silent and get off the elevator, so I run like hell. Come up here, my own hommies can't even open the fuckin' door! But Hermione here is sweet, you're one of the lucky ones, Dracey," Eddie announced, slinging an arm around Hermione's scrawny shoulders. She blushed for a moment, then shook it off and remembered her decency.
"So whas happenin' in this crib? You guys got it made! Didn't see my room yet, but damn! If my room's like this, I'm gonna have to go Michael Jackson on that fat ass and walk around like a rich white pimp. Yup, live the easy life. The room back in Ravenclaw's wing is just plain out messed up, you know what I'm sayin'? Joey's so anorexic, it's like the mattress above me is billowing. But my bed is big pimpin', with a stash of grass under my bed!"
"Just a thought," Draco pointed out as Hermione trotted back over into bed where it was warm, "I'm feeling this strong aura that you aren't supposed to be in Ravenclaw."
"You talkin'?" Eddie snapped as Draco's blanket slid slowly down his firm, bare chest, exposing a certain silver chain with an outstretched silver model of a dragon attached to it.
"To put it bluntly?" Draco asked particularly to himself, "I'm saying you're...dense. Does that work for you?"
"Really, well what I call a discriminating hypocrite such as yourself I would simply have to label a misnomer. I find it intriguingly fun to act...retarded, in some terms, but I can go all thirty-year-old white business man on you when I want," Eddie replied, leaning against the wall, relaxing himself into happy time once more. "Hey, you guys wanna go and maul around? I've only seen the outskirts of London, never the action. Hey, we could go to a strip club and drop Hermione off at the male strip club!"
"Let me think about it," Draco stared blankly at him, body utterly still, "No."
"Ah, come on!" Eddie pleaded, turning to Hermione, "You in?"
"I'm not sure," she replied uncomfortably.
"No, she's not. We're not getting ourselves into another stupid act," Draco snapped, Eddie putting his hands up to his shoulders as a sign of surrender.
"Which stupid act?" Hermione asked, turning towards him on the bed. He snapped his beautiful face back to her; brows still furrowed.
"I'm talking about getting caught by Lucius again. The first time I...what's the word...rescued you from him we got in a lot of deep shit, and I don't want to go through that perfume department again."
"I hate goin' through there," Eddie pointed out.
"Shut-up. I'm quoting it as an example. But we've done a lot of stupid things these past few months, and I want to be done with it," Draco informed her, throwing himself back onto the bed and smothering his face with his feathery pillow.
"What I'm understanding from you, Draco," Hermione stated, her turn to furrow her eyebrows, "Is that you're saying the fact that you saved me from that lunatic was a mistake. Are you saying I'm a mistake?"
"No, I'm saying we were stupid," Draco's voice was muffled, but it sounded more angry with themselves than sincere.
"We were trying to stay alive. We made some mistakes, sure, but all the same it was far more intelligent to run away than stay put and have him kill us all the same," she replied, voice growing angry as Eddie shuffled his feet unconfidently.
"I'm not saying that," Draco muttered, tossing and turning in the bed.
"Yes you are," she replied, throwing the covers off hastily and stalking towards the door. She already had on her outfit from that night, so she was prepared to leave and cool off for an hour or so.
"Where are you going?" Draco demanded, voice straining a tint of restlessness and worry.
"I'm going to go somewhere in this damn place where I won't be thought of as a mistake!" She hissed, venom edging with every syllable.
"Hey, wait up!" Eddie called as she slammed the door behind her in a hurry. She wasn't sure why she had gotten so mad after she walked a few steps away from her temporary hotel room, but it surged an annoyance of how Draco was acting like such a negative bastard recently. No matter what he said, it just had to be minor or insulting to someone. Even when he had told her he loves her, it sounded strained, as if he were trying to hold back his contempt. All Hermione needed was room, which was all, or at least of what she thought.
Eddie jogged back towards her as she stormed down the hallway to the elevator. She wasn't quite sure exactly where she was going. When Hermione's pissed, she'll go for any sane alternative. Even if it wouldn't be for her better and sober judgement.
"Whoa, wait up! Let's get Shane and the others and we'll go see The Rocky Horror Picture Show!" He said, pounding on his original door to get his other odd friends. "Come on, bitches! We're gonna see T.R.H.P.S!"
"T.R.H.P.S?!" They shouted, rustling all over on the other side of the door. A moment or so later, the door swung open, and Joey, Rick, and Shane all walked out with an umbrella. They swiftly turned towards Hermione, who had stopped a few feet ahead with the tip of her foot tapping.
"Hey, Hermione!" Shane greeted, surprised, "Where's Draco?"
"He decided a movie was a mistake, like a lot of things," she smiled innocently to herself, turning around on her heel and stalking off towards the elevator. What was wrong with Draco all of a sudden? When she first came to the mansion he had been arrogant and then flirtatious and competitive once they made a run for it, but now he was bitter and sarcastic. Why was that all of a sudden? She still found him attractive, but he was suddenly...different. But supposedly you can never tell with Draco.
"Told you she was free, no way anyone can stand a dragon ass like Malfoy," Rick muttered to Shane as they entered the elevator. Hermione chose to ignore that comment.
"Come on, guys, keep your karma," Joey persisted, slapping Eddie's dark hand away from the buttons and pressed the 1st floor instead.
"Keep your karma, keep you karma," Eddie mocked in a shrill, whiney voice, trying to give Joey the supernatural sign with his fingers, but to no avail.
"It's like this," Joey rolled his eyes, throwing his hand up towards himself and made a hand gesture with two fingers at either side and thumb sticking to the side. "Scientists say our next evolutionary break-through will be for our thumbs to grow as long as our index finger and our pinkies to indent itself."
Eddie stared at his thumb in puzzlement, "I'm not ready to outgrow my thumb yet, dude, I still have so many cool things to do with it."
As the elevator door opened again, they all stepped out one after the other, until Eddie recognized a certain security guard chatting with a man at the counter. He ducked instantly and snatched Rick's umbrella to shield himself from the overweight old man. Without being seen or heard, they made their way out of the four star hotel and trotted down the snowy still streets of London. Everything was white; including the slushy streets were frosting over from the lack of cars rolling down it. It was cold, but bitter sweet, so either way it felt like a soft, warm snowfall.
"Whoa, it got quiet all of a sudden," Eddie announced, whistling as they walked down the bare streets. "Two rules to go by on the streets: act like a gangsta, and no one'll mess withch ya. Two, act tough, cause aint no one gonna mess wit' ya when you've got an attitude. Unless it's some bigger dawg, then you've gotta watch it. Three, don't walk with a bunch of white ass fruits," he stepped away from Rick, Joey, and Shane, and began walking with Hermione instead. Joey stared at his three fingers in puzzlement as he thought over Eddie's 'two' rules.
"Which way are we going, buttholio?" Rick shouted, cackling as he broke the silence of the quiet streets.
"First off, shut-up, dick ass, second off, I dunno," Eddie replied.
"I know these parts like the back of my hand. My...parents were traveling these parts for quite a while, so I'm aware the theater is done this road," Shane announced, pointing straight ahead of them with his index finger.
"Good, you know where McDonalds at? I'm fuckin' starved," Eddie groaned, swinging around a frosty black pole.
~~~~~~
"They're going to The Theater, an old building where they feature old movies from the forties to the eighties," Tom chuckled, twiddling his fingers in front of him as Lucius smirked, head nodding as he stood at the doorway of the motel they had secretly not paid for. Who needs to when you can wound the couple before them out? Muggle money was nonsense.
"Excellent, did Shane send you that message?" Lucius asked, hands folding behind his back.
"He tried hiding it from me," Tom sneered in spite of himself, "but his directive instincts were clear. He cannot keep such secrets from me. Not one."
"Perfect, then shall we capture the girl and simply inject a sample of Draco's sperm into her? It seems quite easy enough. The thing with my young son was that every so often the thought of his sheets wet after a long, deep sleep slipped his mind. So with all of the sheets I've been revealed time over time has been quite... What's the word...disgusting after a while," Lucius grimaced, until recovering to his normal, solemn state.
"I could have gone a life time without knowing your son was a heavy sex addict in his dreams, Lucius," Tom cringed, cocking an eyebrow, "but who can say most young boys aren't, I suppose."
"All of the same, sir, shall we have done with the process now or would it be better to wait? Our chances of Draco becoming a Black Satan again are slim, but there is a thin thread of hope. Actually, there are many opportunities in which we could have way with this occurrence. We could have the girl have Draco's offspring after casting a strong spell over her, and their child may be immortal. Probably a Black Satan itself. But then again, we could also kill the sacrifice for a better cause. And why must it be Hermione? We could have a much more agreeable young lady on our hands."
"No, Lucius, we shall stick to the plan. I want that girl dead, no matter if she is a mudblood. She's screwed up every chance I've had ever since she entered the picture of my doings, and I want it to stop. Besides, we need your child for the proposition, and she seems to be the only one his heart has set for," Tom replied casually, spinning around on his chair on wheels.
"Or are you just angry because you can't do the spell yourself on her, and even if you could, she would never be obliged to let you do so?" Lucius asked, turning away with a slight smirk.
Tom glared as him, and Lucius could feel it, "Do not speak of my authority in such a manner, Mr. Malfoy. Besides, I'm sure I could match Draco's DNA with my own and do a simple transfiguration spell, but I have my ways. We shall have Draco and Hermione have it on their own, because I have a feeling it will be soon. Oh, yes, Lucius, it will be soon." He grinned sadistically to himself as he spun towards the snow streaked window, frost biting at the glass from the cold wind.
~~~TBC~~~
Chapter Eight of Damned Eyes: Yes, I do realize how twisted and perverted that long conversation was. Anyway, shit happens. Sniff sniff. I'm sad and depressed! Read my author's note and see why I was so late on updating. It's a fucking long author's note.
BrAnDi's Note: I'm watching South Park right now, something my old crush and I would constantly talk about. Here's my problem: I've liked this guy (I'll call him BS for bull shit) for about four months now at school. We've talked a lot and flirt sometimes, and he would always come to my locker and come up to me and talk about South Park or something. I liked it, I thought he was really cute in a geeky way. But other girl's have liked him, go figure. But that's my problem now! Before Christmas break, my friend told me he told her he likes me, and I started freaking out and wondering what the hell to do, so I got my mind off of writing. I'm sorry for that! I never should have, I now realize! But I did, and all vacation I was wondering what the hell I'm going to say or what to do, you know? Well, when I get back, he talks to me and I talk, but then it lessens every day. Day after day he stops talking to me and showing up at my locker, and I wonder why. Maybe he's busy or we have nothing much to talk about? No. I begin to notice more and more of how this other poseur (I'll call her the poseur, if that'll work) talks to him and flirts and they have assigned seats next to each other in at least every class. Now, I try ignoring it, thinking he doesn't like her, he likes me, right? Most recently, last Friday, I asked my friend to tell him I like him because now we NEVER get to talk or he won't come up to me (I'm one of those people who are anti-social and don't start up the conversation unless you're my friend) and she tells me later that day that he'll tell me the answer in person. Monday, I couldn't wait any long, I HAD to know if he liked me, because then there wouldn't be any other way he would tell me, you know? Well, later Monday, my friend comes up to me (I had written a note for her to show him so she would have proof and he would tell her; she took the note back so he wouldn't show it around) and gives me back the note. The poseur walks up to me 8th hour when my friend had given it to me and starts bombarding me with questions about the note and the guy I like, BS, and I hadn't read it yet. I tell her I sort of like him and that the note was asking so. She bothers me all hour. When she leaves me alone, I read the note, nervous like hell, hoping against hope that he says what I hoped he would say. He didn't say what I had hoped. My friend had written me back saying he said 'I' (as in me) took too long so NOW he likes someone else! She also writes he claims he never liked me in the first place when in fact he had told her he did. I wasn't heartbroken, just pissed. Very, very, very pissed. I TOOK TOO LONG?!? I still have that statement in my mind. Tell me, all of you, now how would I have had the idea that he liked me when he never said he did, and so how would I have taken too long? What the hell does that mean?! BULL SHIT!!! This note it getting long for a note, but I don't care. I'm pissed. Tuesday, I'm not quite sure what had happened, unless I had written the note Tuesday...oh, sorry! I wrote the note Tuesday! TODAY was the day to talk about the note Brandi had written (Wednesday). YEP, let's all talk about the fucking note! I know I never should have asked him, but I had to know! He likes the poseur and as I may not be FINE with that, I don't care anymore. Even after being his friend way longer than she has and we have a hell lot more things in common...sorry, lost where I was. Anyway, today I was writing a note to my supposed friend. I told her how pissed off I was, and she told me that BS had let her read the note and some other people. Now I'm thinking, I'M VERY PISSED NOW. She also told me that the poseur asked BS if he likes me or are we going out, and he says in this yeah right voice that he never had in the first place, and she laughs! She fucking laughs!!! Bad enough, she laughs about that! So I'm expressing to my friend how pissed I am in the note, calling the poseur a huge poseur, and my friend starts acting like yea, whatever. Then she asks if she can keep the note because she likes to collect them. Thinking, okay, sure, I let her keep the note. Guess what the hell happens next? My 'friend' wasn't sitting at my table at lunch, but I didn't bother to look up from my little table of other friends. They're not BEST BEST friends, but they're someone to stick with. Anyway, the poseur's friend stops me as I go to 5th hour and says that BS and the poseur aren't going out and that my 'friend' let them all see it, so I say I don't care anymore with a smile and say I'm not mad at the poseur. Secretly, I'm VERY VERY SHIT LIKE PISSED at my 'FRIEND'. I had even asked in the note that she would not tell the poseur what I'm saying. I was mad at the time, that's all. Well, when I go to 6th hour after worrying all 5th hour of what the hell everyone is going to say after realizing my 'friend' had gone off and did shit behind my fucking back, I see BS and the poseur walking together to 6th hour; their in my class. Not very surprised, but I wonder what do they think of me? I could care less, but what does BS think? Does he still like me or despise me or would rather stay away from me? I wasn't sure, still not. So, later, 'my friend' asks me if I'm mad at the poseur anymore. I simply say no, ignoring the fact she had pissed me off and so much crap. So she tries dragging me over to the poseur! Why must people try making me friends with idiots I would rather not be friends with? This girl has a whiney voice and is into the complete opposite of bands and stuff I like, plain out! I don't like her very much, but I can tolerate her! Once I refuse, she tries dragging the poseur over to me! That didn't work either. Other than that, I have no further problems about this huge problem at school I have. BS completely avoids me now. Grreat. What'll happen when I new South Park comes on next week? Will he suddenly show up and start talking to me about it again, or will he try talking to the poseur, who does not watch South Park by my knowledge, and still avoid me? Or talk to his dumb ass friends who probably won't listen? I'm the only one who'll listen, which is the problem. So that's what I've had my mind on the past month or so. I wanted to come out with this Christmas special or what not of this chapter before Christmas, but thanks to BS my mind has been thinking otherwise. I'm so sorry it's very late, and that I've probably wasted your time with my problems! It's just I want someone ELSES opinion on how full of shit BS is full of or something like that. I know I've made a lot of mistakes, so please don't point that out! I'm trying to forget my mistakes! I'm not searching for sympathy, just someone who uunderstands, that's all. Sorry this was a long note, just hope I don't have to go to school tomorrow, please. I really don't want to face all of these fucking problems again, with everyone still thinking I probably like BS when I don't and that I'm still mad at the poseur which I'm not but I'm pissed at everyone. Crap like that. So a new chapter for Thoughtless will be up soon, I promise promise promise, and if you someone gives me their opinion on the topic, I might be happy about how someone agrees with me and come out with a new chapter sooner! Thank you so much!