The Death of the Emperor's Hand
Part 2: The Death of the Emperor's Hand
SJ 12-01-00/08-02 (skyjade@globetrotter.net)
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Disclaimers: Nothing in the Star Wars Universe belong to me; everything belongs
to George Lucas. Also, everything related to the spoken parts of The Last
Command belongs to Timothy Zhan. I'm only borrowing it to make more sense with
Mara's or Luke's missing thoughts. Naturally, everything related to events of
Last Command also belong to Timothy Zhan. Please don't sue me, it's only for
fun; I'm not making any money out of this. See my home page for more details.
Http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Quasar/3702
Special thanks to Adrianne for her help with beta-reading. Thank you for
giving me some of your precious time, my friend; I appreciate.
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(Place: just after C'Boath's death on Wayland)
Just as Luke and Leia finished to cut open the wall of the throne room, the Wild
Karrde came into position to take them aboard. Lando and two other men were
waiting for them at the side hatch.
"A little closer, Aves," Lando told someone via his comlink. "A little more, a
little more---stop!" Next, he addressed his friends who were gathering around
the opening. "Whenever you're ready, but let's hurry. This place will blow in
less than a minute!"
"You first, Luke," Leia insisted.
Before he could protest, Lando and the two others had taken hold of his nearby
wrists and helped him across the gap. An unconscious Mara followed him, then the
others piled up aboard as fast they could.
"Hit it fast!" Lando ordered the pilot as the others sealed the hatch.
As they felt the sudden acceleration, Luke discovered that he was too weak to
keep his balance and landed on his butt just beside where Mara had been laid
down. Leia was instantly at his side.
"Luke, are you okay?" she inquired worriedly.
"Sure, I just stumbled," he reassured her as innocently as he could although he
was aware that he was more than tired; he was in fact lucky to not share Mara's
state.
"You don't look fine, Kid," Han commented as he helped him to his feet. Luke
dimly noticed that he had retrieved his old lightsaber from the clone.
"Neither do you, old pirate," Luke returned with a tired smirk, desperately
trying to keep his friends from finding the truth about his actual status; he
didn't want to be fussed over.
"You've both got bunks with your names on them in the medcenter at home," their
female companion informed them as she joined her husband and helped her brother
up.
Both men groaned.
'Not again.'
Meanwhile, Karrde, who'd picked up his associate, stood up and brushed past
them.
"Well, I'm not waiting that long for her; she's got a reservation aboard this
ship." He looked at Luke. "Thank you for saving her life," he said earnestly.
"No problem," Luke answered warmly.
Nodding at the Jedi, Karrde walked away from the rebel heroes. He had barely
stepped a few meters away from them when he heard something heavy fall on the
floor. Puzzled, he turned around and realized that Skywalker's knees had given
up holding him in a standing position.
"Nothing wrong, uh?" the petite brunette scolded her brother.
"Hey, Karrde, do you have an extra bunk in your medunit?" Solo asked.
"More than one." he answered, appraising the Jedi's condition.
"Up you go, Luke," the councilor helped her brother to his feet, then Han slung
his other arm around his shoulder, careful to avoid his own blisters.
"I'm just tired," The Jedi defended tiredly.
"Then you'll be in the perfect place to rest," the young woman teased him.
While he watched the interplay with interest, Karrde noticed that the Jedi
really made efforts to not trip again and surmised that he was not in as good a
shape as he wanted them to believe. He led the trio down corridors and toward
his ship's medbay.
In the distance, Mount Tantiss blew up in an explosive display of fireworks.
******
By the time they found the Falcon's landing site, Luke knew that he was more
than just a little bit tired. He could recognize the seizures, as well as the
double visions, that were caused by exposure to intense electricity.
However, although he knew where this could lead him, he kept his true injuries
secret. He simply knew that his friends would keep him aboard the Wild Karrde
if they found out just how bad his condition was. If that happened, he also
knew that he would share a cabin with Mara. Even though she'd saved his life,
he had to admit that even more than being kept in bed, the prospect of speaking
with her now worried him.
Considering everything that had happened during their trek through the forest
and in Mount Tantiss, he uneasily wondered what would happen next. Ever since
he had met her, he had cared about her in ways that were puzzling him, had even
felt physically attracted to her but had managed to temper himself given the
fact that the lady had sworn to kill him.
However, that had been before he had begun to train her in the ways of the
Force... before they had fought side by side against a deadly dark Jedi...
before she had saved his life before almost sacrificing hers.
Now, he simply didn't know how he felt anymore, or rather, he did know but knew
that he couldn't give into those feelings just yet.
Hence, he had to sort through his feelings before dealing with his friend.
Besides, he shrugged to himself, she would also need the downtime because much
more had happened for her than him on Wayland.
A while later, he and his group exchanged goodbyes with the smugglers and
disembarked from the Wild Karrde. On their way out, Karrde informed them that he
also would head for Coruscant since Mara needed more treatment than he could
offer, and his pets were also in bad shape. He also knew that he needed to
explain a few things to the leaders of the Republic.
******
Aboard the Falcon, Luke and Han let their friends tend them to the best of their
abilities, then they all relaxed and recuperated from their latest challenge.
What they didn't realize though, until too late, was that Luke's condition was
worst than he was letting them think.
Two days before reaching Coruscant, and four since leaving Wayland, Leia and Han
awoke and found that their friend was unconscious and bathing in sweat.
When they reached home, they rushed him to the medcenter where he was dumped in
a bacta tank.
Not surprisingly, the same thing had happened to Mara.
******
When Mara's senses returned to her, they did so slowly, without rushing
anything.
First, she became aware that she was in a bed, then she opened her eyes and saw
that she was in a medical unit. She recognized the imperial layer which then led
her to remember the most recent events. She thus confirmed with herself that
she was back on Coruscant.
That simple acceptance woke her up completely, but she closed her eyes again as
tiredness reclaimed her. Oh well, she shrugged inwardly, given her weakened
status, it would be easier to think that way anyway. Her first thought was that
her actual status was very bothering in itself.
Much like the whole situation in fact, she then sighed as she began to consider
absolutely 'everything' that had taken place throughout the past months.
Now why hadn't she stirred away from Skywalker's X-wing and stay out of the NR
business?!, she scolded herself after her first thoughts. She had been
perfectly happy---
And now she was lying to herself, she admitted truthfully as the rest of the
events entered her conscious mind.
She hadn't been happy when she had met Skywalker for the first time; she'd been
miserable, lonely, and enchained in the worst kind of a way.
As those realizations settled in her murky brain, she felt her temper mellow
until she was ready for what she was facing now that she was free from her
chains.
She had to stop acting like the ex-Emperor's Hand, she decided. She was free
now... free to think and feel.
Cautiously, she explored her real feelings.
Thus, she discovered that unlike the last time she'd awoken in this medcenter,
she wasn't filled with hatred and despise for the people who were tending her;
this time, she was confused, something which had become quite customary
recently.
And all that thanks to Skywalker, she sighed in annoyance. The man who had
destroyed her life--- but also the man whom she'd saved and who had saved her
life again.
She pursed her lips at that thought before another thought followed it,
mellowing her mood yet again.
Skywalker was also the man who'd helped her to free herself from her slaver's
hold. He was also the man who'd become her only true friend... For better or
worse though, she couldn't say yet.
She sighed loudly, then started when she became aware that he might be in the
same room than her. She opened her eyes and looked around herself; she was
alone. She sighed again, this time in relief.
Much to her surprise, she then instinctively yet cautiously reached out and
found his warm presence just on the other side of the wall. She realized that
he too was in bad shape; unlike her, he was still unconscious.
As she broke the contact, she wondered why it had been so important for her to
check on him in the first place. It wasn't like she cared about him, she tried
to reason, nor that he was in danger, and she knew that she would see him before
long, much to her annoyance. He simply had a knack to be ever-present around
her.
Now that she'd helped them so much, she guessed that she'd see him even more
than before.
Just great.
Or was it?... Skywalker had shown her more compassion and kindness than anybody
had ever bothered to show her, and that despite the fact that she had told him
that she would kill him... although she had never been able to be true to her
word.
But then, her gentler side reminded her cooler one, he was kind, compassionate,
earnest, powerful, great,... handsome---- And she was going to see more of him
now that the crisis was over?! she asked herself.
She fumed in irrational frustration. What surprised her though was that when
she searched her feelings, the prospect of seeing him again didn't irate her as
much as she was pretending that it was...
She turned on her side and closed her eyes again and continued her analysis of
the situation.
Now that the dark episode was over, she was free to get out of there, out of
this confusing and too complex situation, and that was exactly what she was
going to do once those torture droids and their assistants would let her out.
She closed her eyes and tried to fall back asleep because she really didn't feel
like exploring further her relationship with Skywalker right about now, nor
ever.
As memories of what had been done to her, she resolved that no other Jedi would
ever manipulate her again. Never ever. And considering how the Jedi had been
affecting her since their first meeting... she estimated that he was a danger
she didn't want to deal with at the moment.
What she needed was to strengthen herself.
******
In the adjoining room, Luke and Han were slowly recovering from their respective
treatments. The moment that Luke had awakened, Leia had naturally scolded her
brother for hiding his status, as had Han despite his semi-conscious state.
Luke knew that he should have told them about it, but he also knew that they
wouldn't have been able to do anything about it anyway. When they had asked for
proof, he had reminded them that Mara's state had also degenerated like he had
in spite of Karrde's tending.
Mara..., he thought warmly. Now that his head wasn't filled with pain, he could
think clearly about her and what could happen next.
She'd broken free of the last bonds of her slavery, but from what he knew of
her, of her pride, he admitted that it wouldn't mean that she'd have forgiven
him for destroying her life.
Hence, he could only hope that she wouldn't want to kill him anymore. He would
accept her decision to never like him if she so choose, but he himself liked her
very much when she was cool yet friendly with him, he smiled slightly.
"Wouldn't be thinking about a certain red-head, now, would you?" Han teased from
his bed which was on the other side of the room.
"Why would I?" he asked the other innocently.
"Why indeed?" Han smiled, as if seeing something which Luke couldn't see nor
sense.
"What is this supposed to mean?" he asked, propping himself on his elbow.
Han gave him that 'come on' look. "You seemed to be pretty close at the end of
our little trek," he commented playfully.
Luke rolled his eyes to Han's suggestion. "Han, buddy, I don't think you know
the lady that well. Mara doesn't like me, she barely bears my presence around
her."
"Wasn't Leia exactly like that with me?.."
"That's different; Leia has never been obsessed with killing you," Luke pointed
out seriously although he too had made the parallel between the women before.
"Perhaps, but people change," the ex-smuggler shrugged slightly.
Luke nodded in agreement. "I know..."
But he also knew that Mara would never change as much as Leia or Han had
changed; his new friend might loose her dark sided personality, but certainly
not her pride nor independence.
The door of the room opened and medics came in. While they ran tests on him,
Luke considered asking for news concerning his friend.
******
Now that she was better rested and almost recovered, Mara Jade, ex-Emperor's
Hand, took the time to consider her future, objectively this time.
One thing was sure, she conceded seriously, the Empire wasn't part of it. On the
other hand, she couldn't conceive the possibility of joining the New Republic...
yet.
Working with Karrde would be quite challenging, in its own way, but she would
bet that the New Republic wasn't about to let him off the hook that easily. His
group would probably be involved with them for a while...
Did she want that?, she wondered seriously.
Her first impulse was to say no, but then, an unbidden memory of her last time
with Skywalker made her reconsider her decision. While she didn't want to spend
all her waking hours with him either close or around her, she couldn't say that
she never wanted to see him again either.
Despite all his faults and irritating characteristics, the Jedi 'was' a great
man.
After all, she reminded herself, he had meant to sacrifice his life for hers
back on Wayland... All she had ever shown him had been scorn and hatred, and yet
the Jedi had been on the edge of making the ultimate sacrifice for her sake.
She shook her head at the thought of his boundless selflessness. She simply
couldn't turn her back to him; she had to at least thank him. Besides, she
remembered, he hadn't just sacrificed himself, he had saved her life, body and
soul. Now, nobody had ever done that much for her, nor had she ever even
imagined that anybody would ever bother.
She used to hate that man, true, and he'd known it, but it hadn't stopped him
from helping her as much as he could. He had also given her something she'd
never had before: a friend. And a gorgeous friend at that...
She growled inwardly as she felt the turn of her thoughts. It just wasn't
possible, she argued yet again with herself.
She couldn't possibly feel as attracted to Skywalker as she did to her
mysterious farm boy from Tatooine. Perhaps she was just surrogating the lost
boy by a look-alike, she reasoned.
She came back on track, weighting the for and against.
Against: the Jedi had the frustrating habit to be earnest, which was always
making her loose her cool.
Mara Jade never lost her cool. Period.
She knew what she wanted to be: a free person, a business woman. She knew that
being with Skywalker would not help her reach these goals. In fact, she might
even still kill him if he kept pushing her buttons, and yet...
He was also intriguing enough for her to hope for a few occasions to see him
again, from time to time. Besides, he was quite interesting to look at...
especially his eyes. And now that she didn't want to kill him anymore---
She stopped in shock as she became aware that she really didn't want to kill him
anymore. She had grown so used to this thought, to this compulsion that she had
never thought otherwise... And now she was truly free; she could think for
herself even in this regard!
And she knew who she had to thank for that.
She was musing some more when her door swished open. She raised her head to
look at her visitor and did a mental double-back at her unexpected visitor.
"Hello, Mara. How are you?" Leia Organa Solo asked solicitously.
"I'm better."
"I'm glad."
The petite woman stood by the side of the bed. Mara remained in her rocking
chair.
"How are the others?" she asked, surprising herself with her worry for the other
men.
Where had her self-control and coolness gone for star's sake?!, she mentally
gaped.
"They're better. We feared for Luke for a while, but everybody is recovering
nicely now."
"Good," she nodded, not trusting herself to say more. The mention of loosing
Skywalker had strangely affected her... and she didn't particularly like that
feeling.
"I came here to thank you for your help in this matter, Mara. We couldn't have
done it without you," the diplomatic woman stated seriously.
"I'm also glad I did it," Mara muttered.
"Why did you do it, Mara? You didn't have to."
Mara smirked at that. "Really? Your brother didn't really give me a choice."
"But you could still have told him off," Organa Solo pointed out.
"Sure... I guess I didn't like the idea of clones running around the galaxy. And
I certainly didn't want to see C'Boath installing himself as Emperor."
The galaxy had had enough of one, she thought grimly as she made yet another
parallel between the two darksiders.
"Luke's told me that you've broken free of his manipulations," the other
informed her warmly.
"Oh he did, did he?" Mara asked, narrowing her eyes into their usual slits.
"He didn't mean to upset you, Mara," Organa Solo reassured her. "I think that he
was happy for you."
"Oh," the red-head nodded fractionally, unsure as to how to take this answer.
"Have you thought about what's next for you?" the other inquired somewhat more
seriously.
Mara studied the politician with a wary gaze. Leia Organa Solo hadn't just come
here to thank her. She wanted something else.
"A bit, why?"
"When you will be let out of the medcenter, I think you should come by my
office. Something has come up, and I think that it will interest you," the
brunette finished with a mystical smile.
Mara's eyebrow shot up in puzzlement.
"I will let you rest now, Mara. Thank you again."
"No problem," she answered mechanically while she tried to figure out what the
other woman now had in mind.
Last time she'd seen her, she'd ended up being broken out of detention by
Skywalker and company. She only hoped that the new offer wouldn't involve mad
Jedis and clones, and especially not Skywalker... She also hoped that it would
give her a chance to use her combat skills.
Even if she wasn't quite back on her feet, she reflected that she needed some
action. Her time in the medcenter was driving her stir-crazy.
******
The next day, the medic gave her the permission to leave.
She stood in the corridor for a long time, arguing with herself whether she
should see 'him' or delay this meeting.
Yes, she was free, but she was also growing aware that she had no experience on
how to deal with this freedom, especially the one concerning her feelings about
him.
It had been easy to deny the weird attraction with her hatred, but now... Aw,
Kreth, she scoffed at herself. She'd just killed a dark Jedi and had survived
another's manipulations. She had also survived a meeting with his sister. She
could do it.
She entered the room.
The Jedi was sitting on a bed, reading a datapad. As her eyes rested on his
form ---- she froze in surprise, caught unprepared. He was bare torso once
again, and looking even better than he had aboard the Falcon.
She hurried to cover her reaction when she realized that he was raising his head
to see her.
"Can I come in?" she asked him as coolly as she could.
His eyes seemed to lit up when he saw her. "Mara! Hi! How are you?"
"I could ask you the same thing," she answered, awkwardly returning the smile.
Now that she was facing him, and that she was standing close to him, she
couldn't deny that he truly had a physical effect on her. She was just glad that
Solo wasn't there to witness any betraying reaction.
Luke smiled back at her. "Right. So, how are you?"
"Fine, thanks to you."
"And I, to you," he smiled.
"Stop that, Skywalker."
"Stop what?" he asked innocently.
"Diverting the conversation on me. I came here to thank you," she told him in
slight irritation.
"Mara-"
She sighed in frustration. He was so selfless sometimes, she grumbled inwardly.
She decided to plunge in and told him what she wanted to tell him before
becoming too angered to be nice about it.
"Skywalker, you did not only save my life, but you also gave me back my soul...
You didn't have to, but you helped me... like a friend would... so... I want you
to know that I am grateful for your help."
She cast down her gaze as the weight of her words registered in her mind.
Friend, she had really said it... had really recognized him as a friend.
"No thanks are necessary, Mara, but you're welcome."
She looked back up, mildly surprised.
Luke continued. "I am glad to see you well and at peace with yourself."
She nodded slightly. "Yes, well, it's been a long time coming," she smiled
softly.
The longer she looked at him, and the more she slowly became aware that were he
to lean toward her, she'd kiss him with all her suddenly-allowed-to-live
passion. She caught herself in shock, then added that she wished he would make
that move; it angered her further. As she dealt with those completely
irrational thoughts, she wondered how she was managing to keep her furious blush
from showing up at all.
Luke, for his part, didn't notice the struggle of his companion since he was
absorbed in similar improper thoughts.
He'd never been aware of his true, secret feelings before, but now, he had to
admit that he was getting infatuated with his friend. Her luxuriant hair was
literally beckoning him like a bait would a prey.
As he lost himself in her mesmerizing sight, he wished from the bottom of his
heart that they had met under other circumstances.
When the silence lasted for too long though, he realized that he had to say
something or she would begin to suspect something... and wouldn't like his
attitude.
Hence, he said the first thing that came to mind.
"I'd like to thank you too."
Unaware that Luke was watching her, Mara had engrossed herself in a discreet
study of his well-lit face.
She was busy wondering about his scars on his right cheek when she became aware
that he had spoken to her.
She hurried to come back to reality.
"What did you say?" she inquired, having only heard noises.
"I said I'd like to thank you too."
"For what?" she asked, puzzled.
What had she done for him?.. except killing his clone of course.
A short silence followed, then he answered: "For not killing me."
Oh Kreth!, Mara winced inwardly. He had to bring that up...
"Well," she fumbled in turn, averting his eyes as she searched for a reason
which wouldn't betray 'why' she had not killed him. "Your heroics stilled my
hand," she finally shrugged as if it were inconsequential. 'And your eyes,' she
added silently before refocusing on him.
Those eyes, which she was beginning to know very well, were now looking at her
with slight doubt. Uh-oh, she winced once again, he was not buying it...
"and..," she added while thinking furiously to come up with a more valid excuse.
"I'd never killed a nice person before. All my victims were contemptible."
"I see..." her companion nodded slowly, as if pondering her unusual behavior.
Mara began to feel a tingly sensation at the nape of her neck when the Jedi
looked at her as if he could see right through her. Uh-oh... had she said too
much?.. She tried once again to cover her real reasons.
"And, you know, you saved my life early on in our misadventures, helped me with
the nightmares, and even trained me even though I was still threatening you...,"
she finished, giving him a shrew gaze as she considered her own words.
Skywalker noticed it; he shrugged in confusion. "What?"
"Why did you do it?" she inquired seriously--- and was answered by a shy blush
that crept up from the man's bare torso to his cheeks.
It was her turn to discover how handsome he could be when he was himself.
"I... don't really know," he began with another shrug of his strong shoulders.
"Perhaps because I never abandon anybody without trying to help him or her," he
commented thoughtfully, then chuckled as if remembering some incidents due to
this trait of his. "It's gotten me into trouble a couple of times," he smiled
ruefully.
That new look caught her unprepared once again, but this time, her surprise went
further than admitting that Skywalker was really handsome. This time, his
boyish look reminded her a lot... of her farm boy... For the first time since
meeting with the Jedi, she could even admit that he was as cute as the other had
been. She mentally shook herself to get rid of the misleading idea; Skywalker
was not the farm boy of Tatooine, she had already ascertained this.
She refocused on their exchange.
"Like aboard the Death Star?" she asked teasingly as she remembered the one
rescue she knew most about.
"Yeah, but it was worth it."
"And what about me?" she asked, slightly worried about which answer he would
give her.
"It was worth it too," he reassured her, then turned serious. "You saved me
twice on Wayland, Mara---."
"Thanks to your lessons-" she interrupted his attempt to thank her again.
"And to your former training," he commented. "If you hadn't been so skilled and
determinate, we wouldn't be here now," he finished earnestly.
While this trait of his personality exasperated her, it was not as it used to
be. She stared at him, miffed that he would try to make her the hero of this
adventure----- when something occurred to her.
"Is it why you trained me? Because you'd foreseen what I would have to do?"
He smiled softly. "No, but it felt like the right thing to do, so I followed my
feelings."
She nodded in understanding. Feelings, of course she should have known; ever
since she had begun to listen to him, he had insisted a lot on her following her
feelings...
"And you've helped me to get rid of the Voice. If I hadn't been ready for this
fight..."
She might still be plagued by it, she conceded somberly.
"I wish I had discovered about it sooner," Skywalker commented gently in the
silence.
Mara looked at him once again and searched his eyes; while she knew that he had
seen her nightmares, she still didn't know how he'd found out about the
persisting voice... She hadn't told him about that at all...
"I wouldn't have been ready to listen to you," she finally informed her friend.
"Even when you discovered the truth about the nightmares, I didn't listen to
you... Not yet anyway.... It was a living hell," she finished in barely a
whisper.
Luke listened attentively, indicating his understanding with nods.
"If only I had known-" he began.
Mara looked at him solicitously. "How would you have known, Skywalker? Nobody
knew except me, until you figured 'everything' out."
"Right."
A silence followed that admission, leaving Mara with the feeling that it was up
to her to start a new topic. She admitted to herself that she knew what they
could talk about, but she hesitated before opening it. She hadn't found the
answer to her question by herself, which frustrated her, and she could feel that
Luke would be able to help her, but she also suspected what his answer would
be... and wasn't convinced that she wanted to hear it from him.
In the end though, she gathered her courage and asked him: "What do we do now?".
His answer was as she expected it to be, but the extent of it surprised her.
"We could at least continue your training. You have a lot of potential, and
you've done extremely well up-to-now."
"Me? Potential? I thought that I was only sensitive to the Force?!" she gaped in
utter disbelief.
Skywalker shook his head. "No, if you wish, you can become a fully trained Jedi
Knight... I... guess the Emperor didn't want you to," her friend finished
glumly.
Of course, Mara nodded in agreement. If the fiend had manipulated her about
Skywalker and her uniqueness, then he had undoubtedly done so from the
beginning, starting with her abilities.
"Probably..." she agreed, feeling strangely distant. "I had no intention to
become a Dark Jedi like Vader either. I guess that's why he restrained my
training." She met the Jedi's gaze. "He even took the Force away from me when he
died, you know? And you... gave it back to me..." she realized even as she
focused slightly and felt the energy of the Force inhabit her soul once again.
And for the first time in years, she could feel that it would always be with
her. The young man told her that she was welcome, then a silence stretched
between them. Mara used it to consider his proposition from all angles.
In the end, the answer was easy and for her own benefit.
"Yes, I'd like to continue my training... for a while at least. But," she
warned, suddenly furrowing her brows and planting her fists on her hips. "I'm
not going to call you 'Master'."
Skywalker's reaction totally surprised her: he laughed.
Luke couldn't help it. He burst into uncontrollable laughter. It had never even
crossed his mind that she would call him anything special if he taught her. He
finally quieted down.
"I wouldn't want you to call me that; it wouldn't be right," he reassured her.
She kept her hands on her curved hips. "Oh, then what do I call you?" the
mesmerizingly beautiful young woman inquired with sarcasm.
"You can call me whatever you like, as long as it doesn't break your serenity."
He offered her his hand. "Deal?" he asked as he gazed straight into her jewel
eyes which were now freed from the pain they had hidden for too long.
When he offered her his hand, she dimly noticed the faint scars that were
adorning his arms and chest. She instantly wondered where they were coming from
and reflected that it would be interesting to compare their origin with the
origin of hers. A second later, she firmly took his hand in hers.
"Deal, Skywalker."
The moment she touched him, a nearly-overwhelming electricity coursed through
her whole body, making her tingly with desire. She suddenly had the irresistible
urge to pull him to herself and capture his lips in an hungry kiss---- She
hurriedly broke the physical touch. The urge disappeared.
There hadn't been anything romantic in it, she reflected, just an overwhelming
physical need. She also admitted that normally, she would have given in, but
not with him. She wanted to respect him.
She made a note to not touch him too often.
Meanwhile, Luke was as shocked as Mara was, even if he wasn't aware of her
feelings. He'd never thought that a simple handshake could be that electrifying.
While they had been holding hands, he had been aware of her like never before---
and her hand had felt extremely good in his.
He shook his head, almost imperceptibly. Why was he suddenly feeling this
attracted to her? Sure, she was beautiful, even captivating when considered as
a whole, body and soul, but even so, he didn't consider more than friendship
with her. Besides, he reminded himself, falling in love with Mara wouldn't be a
good idea since it the feeling wouldn't be mutual; a few days ago, he reminded
himself seriously, she had still wanted to kill him.
As he thought back to their first meeting, he felt a new blush creep up his
cheeks as he became aware that, whether he wanted it or not, he had fallen for
her the moment he had seen her. With her blaster aimed at him, she had looked
unlike any other woman he had ever seen before... and it had attracted him like
a moth to the flame...
Had he been alone at the moment, he reflected that he would fling his arms at
the sky in frustration. He was simply always attracted to the wrong women:
first, his sister, then a senator who had religious restrictions, and now,
someone who'd written a book about how to kill him the most efficient way.
Would he ever learn?, he asked himself sarcastically.
While Luke debated his experiences with women, Mara recovered from their touch
and noticed that he was also silent, probably to respect her, she reflected.
She decided to conclude the visit as soon as possible before her body did
something that she'd regret.
"So, when do we start?" she prompted him.
"As soon as you're ready." Luke answered, focusing back on her.
Mara couldn't help but smirk at that. "Once you're out of the medcenter of
course." she pointed out.
The face he made was priceless.
"Uh, yeah," he nodded sheepishly.
"Why are you still here anyway?"
Surely he hadn't been in worse shape than she had been, she reflected seriously.
However, as she noticed a new blush creep up his jaw, she considered the
possibility that she was wrong.
However, she was adamant about one thing: Skywalker really looked very boyish
and cute when he was blushing.
"Uh... Well, I'm waiting for my last check-up," he explained as he averted her
eyes and distractedly scratched his neck. "Since I'm known as a regular in the
medcenter, they don't let me off the hook without making sure that I'm truly
recovered," he finished with a sigh of frustration.
It made him that more endearing; her reaction irritated her once again. She had
to get out of here!, she thought, yet couldn't restrain her amused comment.
"Why? Farmboy has been bad in the past?"
Surprised by her choice of moniker, Luke quickly refocused on her; he noticed
her amused expression, then how her contained mirth made her look even more
radiant and enrapturing than she already was. He decided that he liked her
moniker and wouldn't complain about it. In fact, it liked it even better to
'Jedi' or 'Kid'.
"Uh, well, sometimes I've had to come back... after collapsing in the
corridor..." he admitted ruefully.
To his surprise... and delight, Mara chuckled, something which he had never seen
her do before.
"Your trick backfired on you?" she teased him mercilessly.
"I know, no need to rub it in," he answered mock-grumpily.
However, he was far from being upset at her; instead, he wanted to make her
pleasure last.
She deserved all the fun she could have, and more.
"Well then, take it easy, Farmboy," she commented with a smirk. "I wouldn't
want that to happen while we fight. Sure wouldn't want to end up killing you
because you had a relapse," she pointed out mock-seriously.
"Right," he nodded, slightly saddened by the fact that she was already leaving
yet knowing better than to try and keep her any longer than she wanted to.
"Now, I'm going to meet your sister. She told me that she had a proposal for
me," she informed him before raising an eyebrow in inquiry: "Any idea?"
"Nope," he smiled, elated at the prospect that Leia and Karrde's idea of a
smuggler alliance could involve Mara. That way, he thought earnestly, he would
have better chances of running into her again then and again.
Perhaps even more often than if he were only to try to train her as they had
just discussed.
"Okay, well, see you later!" she nodded once, then turned her back to him.
"Bye," he bid her, barely restraining his delighted smile from showing on his
face.
He watched her leave and hoped that he'd see her soon. Upon that thought,
another fiery blush inflamed his face and chest as it brought back home the fact
that if he weren't careful, he would 'really' fall in love with the fiery Mara
Jade... who would probably kill him if she ever found out what he was thinking
about.
Well, he sighed to himself as he leaned back in his pillows, if death had to
come to them all, then he'd choose a death for loving Mara Jade over anything
else.
An angel was worth such a sacrifice, he admitted wryly, naively, then caught
himself and forced himself to come back down to Coruscant and the real world.
As he refocused on his reports about the battle of the shipyards of Bilbringi,
he belatedly realized that it had been a long, long while since he had
daydreamed as he had used to on Tatooine.
A long time indeed, he smirked slightly before turning back to more serious
matters.
******
The next day, Mara wandered inside the former imperial palace, considering
Leia's offer.
Either the galaxy was against her, she fumed slightly, or Skywalker's kindness
was rubbing off on her; she hoped that it wasn't the latest option for it would
be quite infuriating considering her former persona.
Organa Solo's offer was very interesting though. On the positive side, she'd
get all the freedom and the action she wanted while still being able to work on
her trading idea as well as train a little bit with the Jedi; on the negative
side, she would be working close-quarters with the New Republic, which she still
didn't like that much, and possibly Skywalker, who was having more than just a
physical effect on her. Training with him was one thing, but going off in
missions with him was quite another...
In fact, it was making her nervous.
She stopped her train of thoughts on this one. Her? Nervous?
No, she shook her head. The cool-headed Emperor's Hand couldn't be nervous, and
yet, she reflected as she allowed herself to analyze her worry, she had never
had to interact with a friend before. Up to now, her interactions had been
limited to giving orders to officers and rulers, reporting and obeying her
master, and insulting her victims.
Not much small talk, she pouted.
Still, she wondered seriously, would she sacrifice her freedom and dream because
she didn't want to risk the possibility of spending much time with the Jedi? Not
in her life, she decided. Besides, she had yet to resolve her ongoing conflict
between her head and her regenerated heart.
Yes, Skywalker represented a danger, she admitted to herself, and yet,... she
had found herself missing his company the previous evening, much to her
frustration. However, she could admit that after their latest talk and the
moniker that she had chosen for him, a moniker which already fit him to
perfection, she really wanted to know him better... to know the farmboy, not
just the Jedi and kind man.
And speaking of farmboy, she reflected as she pondered her other option, if she
did say no to the offer, if she instead simply trained a bit with the Jedi and
left, she'd be free to track down her Tatooine farm boy and bring him back with
her...
And what was she thinking?, she berated herself. The boy had grown and probably
had a life of his own now, a life she had 'no' right to ruin because she was
still lusting for him after all those years of desertion. The Emperor's Hand
wouldn't have hesitated to do that, but the reborn Mara Jade wasn't feeling
overjoyed by such a prospect.
No, she shook her head in sadness, she couldn't go after him. She had lost him,
plain and simple... had even never really had him in the first place.
Besides, she tried to hearten herself, he would be too easy to conquer... not
challenging enough.
... Skywalker on the other hand, she thought almost reflexively before she could
quash her idea. Now there was quite an interesting prospect---- if she were to
chase him at all of course, she amended coolly to keep herself in check.
However, she had to concede that she rather liked the fact that the Jedi was far
from helpless, could withstand her tricks... and that he 'knew' her, for real.
More important, she knew him better now. He was not just a Jedi with tricks up
his sleeve; he was a genuine human being, a very unique man who'd been through
much, and someone who was showing interest for her.
And real human interest at that, she reminded herself. The young man was not
only looking for a business relationship or a potential-oriented one. Despite
his Jedi reputation... he had retained his boyishness from his early years.
Farmboy..., she smiled wistfully. It was funny how the moniker had come out
unbidden in the medcenter, and yet it fit him so well. Especially considering
the new side of his personality which she'd gotten a peak at in the medcenter.
He hadn't complained about it either while he had always given her almost pained
looks when she had sneered her 'Jedi' at him. Could he agree with her and like
that teasing address?, she wondered. He had sure never been that unresponsive
when even his Solo friend had called him 'Kid'.
All in all, she conceded as she looked around herself to see where she had
wandered, despite all her misgivings and instincts of protection, she wanted to
deepen her friendship with Skywalker, even if he would surely make it difficult
for her to remain at peace with herself.
Meanwhile, she realized that her feet had taken her down a corridor whose layout
she recognized. She turned toward the stairwell and headed for the 'secret'
access to the roof.
The moment that she opened the door, a strong wind buffeted in, blowing her hair
away from her even as it whipped at her short jacket. However, Mara didn't
notice any of this.
Her eyes were riveted on Imperial City at dusk, a vision of the past... yet she
was in its future now... in her present.
She was free from the Emperor, free to enjoy life as it had always been yet had
never been shown to her this way. Instead, Life, she realized, had always been
little more than a tool in her former life, beings and locations to use to her
advantage.
However, now that she was seeing it with her 'new' eyes as well as her more
sensitive senses, she could 'feel' the teeming energies of the beings who were
making the city live, could consider them as unique entities, aliens and humans
alike, trying to make their way through life as best they could.
And unlike what she had always been led to believe, their way of life wasn't
chaotic... but peaceful.
Reaching the edge of the roof, she leaned against it, then closed her eyes and
reveled in his new, vivid experience of peace.
Peace.
And Freedom.
******
(End of LAST COMMAND)
******
As she gazed at the lightsaber which Luke had just left in her care, Mara
considered what it meant...
And what about the strange electricity which she had felt again when they'd
touched again...? she wondered in confusion. What did it mean? And what was it
about 'this' man??, she asked the sky.
No one, and she meant 'no one', had ever made her weak in the knees like he
did... if only figuratively speaking. She had also never fantasized as much
about a man as she did about 'that' man... And now she wanted to train with
him?
Well, yes, she answered. Her, a Jedi... who would've thought?, she smiled shyly
as images of a brighter future danced in her mind. With him as her teacher, she
knew that it was possible... Everything seemed possible with him. That kind of
frightened her... but it also heartened her to know that she was not alone
anymore.
Perhaps, she conceded shyly, it was time to consider learning about love, true
love... but very cautiously of course because she certainly didn't want to fall
in the opposite trap of what her devotion to her master had been... That hated
man who had betrayed and almost destroyed her...
But Luke would never betray her, she reminded herself warmly, and unlike the
Emperor, he really didn't crave power...
Honesty, greatness and great built..., she thought as the dim memories of her
teenage dreams returned to her. Even then, she had never believed that she
would someday find a man who would match all her criteria; she had thought that
it had been wishful thinking, had hoped that it would be, thus discouraging her
from betraying her master... especially after her misadventure with the gentle
farmboy, who had been great, yes, and kind,... but somehow nothing that could
compare with what she had discovered in Skywalker.
Gods he was enrapturing, she admitted to herself as she remembered their recent
discussion. Even when not involved in a fight, there was a feline grace about
him, and his muscles... and gentleness... and eyes!.. and ----- Darn, she
couldn't believe, nor accept, how much she wanted him to be hers all of a
sudden----
'Sounds like love to me, Jade,' her conscience pointed out to her.
'Well, maybe, but I think it's more like a very strong physical attraction,' she
tried to defend herself.
'Yeah, right, you can't lie to me.'
'Oh, shut up!.. But he'd sure be a great conquest,' she admitted consciously.
And thinking about him... he was part of the future, with the New Republic and
all, and... well,...
"Hang on a minute. I'll come with you," she called out to the object of her
thoughts who had yet to re-enter the building.
And with those simple words, she knew that she had killed her former self.
The Emperor's Hand was no more.
TBC in Friendship part 1 to?
Copyright 2000/2002, SJ (skyjade@globetrotter.net)
Webmaster : Skyjade (Any positive stuff is welcome, but any mean stuff won't
even be read.)
Part 2: The Death of the Emperor's Hand
SJ 12-01-00/08-02 (skyjade@globetrotter.net)
__________________________________________
Disclaimers: Nothing in the Star Wars Universe belong to me; everything belongs
to George Lucas. Also, everything related to the spoken parts of The Last
Command belongs to Timothy Zhan. I'm only borrowing it to make more sense with
Mara's or Luke's missing thoughts. Naturally, everything related to events of
Last Command also belong to Timothy Zhan. Please don't sue me, it's only for
fun; I'm not making any money out of this. See my home page for more details.
Http://www.geocities.com/Area51/Quasar/3702
Special thanks to Adrianne for her help with beta-reading. Thank you for
giving me some of your precious time, my friend; I appreciate.
___________________________________________
(Place: just after C'Boath's death on Wayland)
Just as Luke and Leia finished to cut open the wall of the throne room, the Wild
Karrde came into position to take them aboard. Lando and two other men were
waiting for them at the side hatch.
"A little closer, Aves," Lando told someone via his comlink. "A little more, a
little more---stop!" Next, he addressed his friends who were gathering around
the opening. "Whenever you're ready, but let's hurry. This place will blow in
less than a minute!"
"You first, Luke," Leia insisted.
Before he could protest, Lando and the two others had taken hold of his nearby
wrists and helped him across the gap. An unconscious Mara followed him, then the
others piled up aboard as fast they could.
"Hit it fast!" Lando ordered the pilot as the others sealed the hatch.
As they felt the sudden acceleration, Luke discovered that he was too weak to
keep his balance and landed on his butt just beside where Mara had been laid
down. Leia was instantly at his side.
"Luke, are you okay?" she inquired worriedly.
"Sure, I just stumbled," he reassured her as innocently as he could although he
was aware that he was more than tired; he was in fact lucky to not share Mara's
state.
"You don't look fine, Kid," Han commented as he helped him to his feet. Luke
dimly noticed that he had retrieved his old lightsaber from the clone.
"Neither do you, old pirate," Luke returned with a tired smirk, desperately
trying to keep his friends from finding the truth about his actual status; he
didn't want to be fussed over.
"You've both got bunks with your names on them in the medcenter at home," their
female companion informed them as she joined her husband and helped her brother
up.
Both men groaned.
'Not again.'
Meanwhile, Karrde, who'd picked up his associate, stood up and brushed past
them.
"Well, I'm not waiting that long for her; she's got a reservation aboard this
ship." He looked at Luke. "Thank you for saving her life," he said earnestly.
"No problem," Luke answered warmly.
Nodding at the Jedi, Karrde walked away from the rebel heroes. He had barely
stepped a few meters away from them when he heard something heavy fall on the
floor. Puzzled, he turned around and realized that Skywalker's knees had given
up holding him in a standing position.
"Nothing wrong, uh?" the petite brunette scolded her brother.
"Hey, Karrde, do you have an extra bunk in your medunit?" Solo asked.
"More than one." he answered, appraising the Jedi's condition.
"Up you go, Luke," the councilor helped her brother to his feet, then Han slung
his other arm around his shoulder, careful to avoid his own blisters.
"I'm just tired," The Jedi defended tiredly.
"Then you'll be in the perfect place to rest," the young woman teased him.
While he watched the interplay with interest, Karrde noticed that the Jedi
really made efforts to not trip again and surmised that he was not in as good a
shape as he wanted them to believe. He led the trio down corridors and toward
his ship's medbay.
In the distance, Mount Tantiss blew up in an explosive display of fireworks.
******
By the time they found the Falcon's landing site, Luke knew that he was more
than just a little bit tired. He could recognize the seizures, as well as the
double visions, that were caused by exposure to intense electricity.
However, although he knew where this could lead him, he kept his true injuries
secret. He simply knew that his friends would keep him aboard the Wild Karrde
if they found out just how bad his condition was. If that happened, he also
knew that he would share a cabin with Mara. Even though she'd saved his life,
he had to admit that even more than being kept in bed, the prospect of speaking
with her now worried him.
Considering everything that had happened during their trek through the forest
and in Mount Tantiss, he uneasily wondered what would happen next. Ever since
he had met her, he had cared about her in ways that were puzzling him, had even
felt physically attracted to her but had managed to temper himself given the
fact that the lady had sworn to kill him.
However, that had been before he had begun to train her in the ways of the
Force... before they had fought side by side against a deadly dark Jedi...
before she had saved his life before almost sacrificing hers.
Now, he simply didn't know how he felt anymore, or rather, he did know but knew
that he couldn't give into those feelings just yet.
Hence, he had to sort through his feelings before dealing with his friend.
Besides, he shrugged to himself, she would also need the downtime because much
more had happened for her than him on Wayland.
A while later, he and his group exchanged goodbyes with the smugglers and
disembarked from the Wild Karrde. On their way out, Karrde informed them that he
also would head for Coruscant since Mara needed more treatment than he could
offer, and his pets were also in bad shape. He also knew that he needed to
explain a few things to the leaders of the Republic.
******
Aboard the Falcon, Luke and Han let their friends tend them to the best of their
abilities, then they all relaxed and recuperated from their latest challenge.
What they didn't realize though, until too late, was that Luke's condition was
worst than he was letting them think.
Two days before reaching Coruscant, and four since leaving Wayland, Leia and Han
awoke and found that their friend was unconscious and bathing in sweat.
When they reached home, they rushed him to the medcenter where he was dumped in
a bacta tank.
Not surprisingly, the same thing had happened to Mara.
******
When Mara's senses returned to her, they did so slowly, without rushing
anything.
First, she became aware that she was in a bed, then she opened her eyes and saw
that she was in a medical unit. She recognized the imperial layer which then led
her to remember the most recent events. She thus confirmed with herself that
she was back on Coruscant.
That simple acceptance woke her up completely, but she closed her eyes again as
tiredness reclaimed her. Oh well, she shrugged inwardly, given her weakened
status, it would be easier to think that way anyway. Her first thought was that
her actual status was very bothering in itself.
Much like the whole situation in fact, she then sighed as she began to consider
absolutely 'everything' that had taken place throughout the past months.
Now why hadn't she stirred away from Skywalker's X-wing and stay out of the NR
business?!, she scolded herself after her first thoughts. She had been
perfectly happy---
And now she was lying to herself, she admitted truthfully as the rest of the
events entered her conscious mind.
She hadn't been happy when she had met Skywalker for the first time; she'd been
miserable, lonely, and enchained in the worst kind of a way.
As those realizations settled in her murky brain, she felt her temper mellow
until she was ready for what she was facing now that she was free from her
chains.
She had to stop acting like the ex-Emperor's Hand, she decided. She was free
now... free to think and feel.
Cautiously, she explored her real feelings.
Thus, she discovered that unlike the last time she'd awoken in this medcenter,
she wasn't filled with hatred and despise for the people who were tending her;
this time, she was confused, something which had become quite customary
recently.
And all that thanks to Skywalker, she sighed in annoyance. The man who had
destroyed her life--- but also the man whom she'd saved and who had saved her
life again.
She pursed her lips at that thought before another thought followed it,
mellowing her mood yet again.
Skywalker was also the man who'd helped her to free herself from her slaver's
hold. He was also the man who'd become her only true friend... For better or
worse though, she couldn't say yet.
She sighed loudly, then started when she became aware that he might be in the
same room than her. She opened her eyes and looked around herself; she was
alone. She sighed again, this time in relief.
Much to her surprise, she then instinctively yet cautiously reached out and
found his warm presence just on the other side of the wall. She realized that
he too was in bad shape; unlike her, he was still unconscious.
As she broke the contact, she wondered why it had been so important for her to
check on him in the first place. It wasn't like she cared about him, she tried
to reason, nor that he was in danger, and she knew that she would see him before
long, much to her annoyance. He simply had a knack to be ever-present around
her.
Now that she'd helped them so much, she guessed that she'd see him even more
than before.
Just great.
Or was it?... Skywalker had shown her more compassion and kindness than anybody
had ever bothered to show her, and that despite the fact that she had told him
that she would kill him... although she had never been able to be true to her
word.
But then, her gentler side reminded her cooler one, he was kind, compassionate,
earnest, powerful, great,... handsome---- And she was going to see more of him
now that the crisis was over?! she asked herself.
She fumed in irrational frustration. What surprised her though was that when
she searched her feelings, the prospect of seeing him again didn't irate her as
much as she was pretending that it was...
She turned on her side and closed her eyes again and continued her analysis of
the situation.
Now that the dark episode was over, she was free to get out of there, out of
this confusing and too complex situation, and that was exactly what she was
going to do once those torture droids and their assistants would let her out.
She closed her eyes and tried to fall back asleep because she really didn't feel
like exploring further her relationship with Skywalker right about now, nor
ever.
As memories of what had been done to her, she resolved that no other Jedi would
ever manipulate her again. Never ever. And considering how the Jedi had been
affecting her since their first meeting... she estimated that he was a danger
she didn't want to deal with at the moment.
What she needed was to strengthen herself.
******
In the adjoining room, Luke and Han were slowly recovering from their respective
treatments. The moment that Luke had awakened, Leia had naturally scolded her
brother for hiding his status, as had Han despite his semi-conscious state.
Luke knew that he should have told them about it, but he also knew that they
wouldn't have been able to do anything about it anyway. When they had asked for
proof, he had reminded them that Mara's state had also degenerated like he had
in spite of Karrde's tending.
Mara..., he thought warmly. Now that his head wasn't filled with pain, he could
think clearly about her and what could happen next.
She'd broken free of the last bonds of her slavery, but from what he knew of
her, of her pride, he admitted that it wouldn't mean that she'd have forgiven
him for destroying her life.
Hence, he could only hope that she wouldn't want to kill him anymore. He would
accept her decision to never like him if she so choose, but he himself liked her
very much when she was cool yet friendly with him, he smiled slightly.
"Wouldn't be thinking about a certain red-head, now, would you?" Han teased from
his bed which was on the other side of the room.
"Why would I?" he asked the other innocently.
"Why indeed?" Han smiled, as if seeing something which Luke couldn't see nor
sense.
"What is this supposed to mean?" he asked, propping himself on his elbow.
Han gave him that 'come on' look. "You seemed to be pretty close at the end of
our little trek," he commented playfully.
Luke rolled his eyes to Han's suggestion. "Han, buddy, I don't think you know
the lady that well. Mara doesn't like me, she barely bears my presence around
her."
"Wasn't Leia exactly like that with me?.."
"That's different; Leia has never been obsessed with killing you," Luke pointed
out seriously although he too had made the parallel between the women before.
"Perhaps, but people change," the ex-smuggler shrugged slightly.
Luke nodded in agreement. "I know..."
But he also knew that Mara would never change as much as Leia or Han had
changed; his new friend might loose her dark sided personality, but certainly
not her pride nor independence.
The door of the room opened and medics came in. While they ran tests on him,
Luke considered asking for news concerning his friend.
******
Now that she was better rested and almost recovered, Mara Jade, ex-Emperor's
Hand, took the time to consider her future, objectively this time.
One thing was sure, she conceded seriously, the Empire wasn't part of it. On the
other hand, she couldn't conceive the possibility of joining the New Republic...
yet.
Working with Karrde would be quite challenging, in its own way, but she would
bet that the New Republic wasn't about to let him off the hook that easily. His
group would probably be involved with them for a while...
Did she want that?, she wondered seriously.
Her first impulse was to say no, but then, an unbidden memory of her last time
with Skywalker made her reconsider her decision. While she didn't want to spend
all her waking hours with him either close or around her, she couldn't say that
she never wanted to see him again either.
Despite all his faults and irritating characteristics, the Jedi 'was' a great
man.
After all, she reminded herself, he had meant to sacrifice his life for hers
back on Wayland... All she had ever shown him had been scorn and hatred, and yet
the Jedi had been on the edge of making the ultimate sacrifice for her sake.
She shook her head at the thought of his boundless selflessness. She simply
couldn't turn her back to him; she had to at least thank him. Besides, she
remembered, he hadn't just sacrificed himself, he had saved her life, body and
soul. Now, nobody had ever done that much for her, nor had she ever even
imagined that anybody would ever bother.
She used to hate that man, true, and he'd known it, but it hadn't stopped him
from helping her as much as he could. He had also given her something she'd
never had before: a friend. And a gorgeous friend at that...
She growled inwardly as she felt the turn of her thoughts. It just wasn't
possible, she argued yet again with herself.
She couldn't possibly feel as attracted to Skywalker as she did to her
mysterious farm boy from Tatooine. Perhaps she was just surrogating the lost
boy by a look-alike, she reasoned.
She came back on track, weighting the for and against.
Against: the Jedi had the frustrating habit to be earnest, which was always
making her loose her cool.
Mara Jade never lost her cool. Period.
She knew what she wanted to be: a free person, a business woman. She knew that
being with Skywalker would not help her reach these goals. In fact, she might
even still kill him if he kept pushing her buttons, and yet...
He was also intriguing enough for her to hope for a few occasions to see him
again, from time to time. Besides, he was quite interesting to look at...
especially his eyes. And now that she didn't want to kill him anymore---
She stopped in shock as she became aware that she really didn't want to kill him
anymore. She had grown so used to this thought, to this compulsion that she had
never thought otherwise... And now she was truly free; she could think for
herself even in this regard!
And she knew who she had to thank for that.
She was musing some more when her door swished open. She raised her head to
look at her visitor and did a mental double-back at her unexpected visitor.
"Hello, Mara. How are you?" Leia Organa Solo asked solicitously.
"I'm better."
"I'm glad."
The petite woman stood by the side of the bed. Mara remained in her rocking
chair.
"How are the others?" she asked, surprising herself with her worry for the other
men.
Where had her self-control and coolness gone for star's sake?!, she mentally
gaped.
"They're better. We feared for Luke for a while, but everybody is recovering
nicely now."
"Good," she nodded, not trusting herself to say more. The mention of loosing
Skywalker had strangely affected her... and she didn't particularly like that
feeling.
"I came here to thank you for your help in this matter, Mara. We couldn't have
done it without you," the diplomatic woman stated seriously.
"I'm also glad I did it," Mara muttered.
"Why did you do it, Mara? You didn't have to."
Mara smirked at that. "Really? Your brother didn't really give me a choice."
"But you could still have told him off," Organa Solo pointed out.
"Sure... I guess I didn't like the idea of clones running around the galaxy. And
I certainly didn't want to see C'Boath installing himself as Emperor."
The galaxy had had enough of one, she thought grimly as she made yet another
parallel between the two darksiders.
"Luke's told me that you've broken free of his manipulations," the other
informed her warmly.
"Oh he did, did he?" Mara asked, narrowing her eyes into their usual slits.
"He didn't mean to upset you, Mara," Organa Solo reassured her. "I think that he
was happy for you."
"Oh," the red-head nodded fractionally, unsure as to how to take this answer.
"Have you thought about what's next for you?" the other inquired somewhat more
seriously.
Mara studied the politician with a wary gaze. Leia Organa Solo hadn't just come
here to thank her. She wanted something else.
"A bit, why?"
"When you will be let out of the medcenter, I think you should come by my
office. Something has come up, and I think that it will interest you," the
brunette finished with a mystical smile.
Mara's eyebrow shot up in puzzlement.
"I will let you rest now, Mara. Thank you again."
"No problem," she answered mechanically while she tried to figure out what the
other woman now had in mind.
Last time she'd seen her, she'd ended up being broken out of detention by
Skywalker and company. She only hoped that the new offer wouldn't involve mad
Jedis and clones, and especially not Skywalker... She also hoped that it would
give her a chance to use her combat skills.
Even if she wasn't quite back on her feet, she reflected that she needed some
action. Her time in the medcenter was driving her stir-crazy.
******
The next day, the medic gave her the permission to leave.
She stood in the corridor for a long time, arguing with herself whether she
should see 'him' or delay this meeting.
Yes, she was free, but she was also growing aware that she had no experience on
how to deal with this freedom, especially the one concerning her feelings about
him.
It had been easy to deny the weird attraction with her hatred, but now... Aw,
Kreth, she scoffed at herself. She'd just killed a dark Jedi and had survived
another's manipulations. She had also survived a meeting with his sister. She
could do it.
She entered the room.
The Jedi was sitting on a bed, reading a datapad. As her eyes rested on his
form ---- she froze in surprise, caught unprepared. He was bare torso once
again, and looking even better than he had aboard the Falcon.
She hurried to cover her reaction when she realized that he was raising his head
to see her.
"Can I come in?" she asked him as coolly as she could.
His eyes seemed to lit up when he saw her. "Mara! Hi! How are you?"
"I could ask you the same thing," she answered, awkwardly returning the smile.
Now that she was facing him, and that she was standing close to him, she
couldn't deny that he truly had a physical effect on her. She was just glad that
Solo wasn't there to witness any betraying reaction.
Luke smiled back at her. "Right. So, how are you?"
"Fine, thanks to you."
"And I, to you," he smiled.
"Stop that, Skywalker."
"Stop what?" he asked innocently.
"Diverting the conversation on me. I came here to thank you," she told him in
slight irritation.
"Mara-"
She sighed in frustration. He was so selfless sometimes, she grumbled inwardly.
She decided to plunge in and told him what she wanted to tell him before
becoming too angered to be nice about it.
"Skywalker, you did not only save my life, but you also gave me back my soul...
You didn't have to, but you helped me... like a friend would... so... I want you
to know that I am grateful for your help."
She cast down her gaze as the weight of her words registered in her mind.
Friend, she had really said it... had really recognized him as a friend.
"No thanks are necessary, Mara, but you're welcome."
She looked back up, mildly surprised.
Luke continued. "I am glad to see you well and at peace with yourself."
She nodded slightly. "Yes, well, it's been a long time coming," she smiled
softly.
The longer she looked at him, and the more she slowly became aware that were he
to lean toward her, she'd kiss him with all her suddenly-allowed-to-live
passion. She caught herself in shock, then added that she wished he would make
that move; it angered her further. As she dealt with those completely
irrational thoughts, she wondered how she was managing to keep her furious blush
from showing up at all.
Luke, for his part, didn't notice the struggle of his companion since he was
absorbed in similar improper thoughts.
He'd never been aware of his true, secret feelings before, but now, he had to
admit that he was getting infatuated with his friend. Her luxuriant hair was
literally beckoning him like a bait would a prey.
As he lost himself in her mesmerizing sight, he wished from the bottom of his
heart that they had met under other circumstances.
When the silence lasted for too long though, he realized that he had to say
something or she would begin to suspect something... and wouldn't like his
attitude.
Hence, he said the first thing that came to mind.
"I'd like to thank you too."
Unaware that Luke was watching her, Mara had engrossed herself in a discreet
study of his well-lit face.
She was busy wondering about his scars on his right cheek when she became aware
that he had spoken to her.
She hurried to come back to reality.
"What did you say?" she inquired, having only heard noises.
"I said I'd like to thank you too."
"For what?" she asked, puzzled.
What had she done for him?.. except killing his clone of course.
A short silence followed, then he answered: "For not killing me."
Oh Kreth!, Mara winced inwardly. He had to bring that up...
"Well," she fumbled in turn, averting his eyes as she searched for a reason
which wouldn't betray 'why' she had not killed him. "Your heroics stilled my
hand," she finally shrugged as if it were inconsequential. 'And your eyes,' she
added silently before refocusing on him.
Those eyes, which she was beginning to know very well, were now looking at her
with slight doubt. Uh-oh, she winced once again, he was not buying it...
"and..," she added while thinking furiously to come up with a more valid excuse.
"I'd never killed a nice person before. All my victims were contemptible."
"I see..." her companion nodded slowly, as if pondering her unusual behavior.
Mara began to feel a tingly sensation at the nape of her neck when the Jedi
looked at her as if he could see right through her. Uh-oh... had she said too
much?.. She tried once again to cover her real reasons.
"And, you know, you saved my life early on in our misadventures, helped me with
the nightmares, and even trained me even though I was still threatening you...,"
she finished, giving him a shrew gaze as she considered her own words.
Skywalker noticed it; he shrugged in confusion. "What?"
"Why did you do it?" she inquired seriously--- and was answered by a shy blush
that crept up from the man's bare torso to his cheeks.
It was her turn to discover how handsome he could be when he was himself.
"I... don't really know," he began with another shrug of his strong shoulders.
"Perhaps because I never abandon anybody without trying to help him or her," he
commented thoughtfully, then chuckled as if remembering some incidents due to
this trait of his. "It's gotten me into trouble a couple of times," he smiled
ruefully.
That new look caught her unprepared once again, but this time, her surprise went
further than admitting that Skywalker was really handsome. This time, his
boyish look reminded her a lot... of her farm boy... For the first time since
meeting with the Jedi, she could even admit that he was as cute as the other had
been. She mentally shook herself to get rid of the misleading idea; Skywalker
was not the farm boy of Tatooine, she had already ascertained this.
She refocused on their exchange.
"Like aboard the Death Star?" she asked teasingly as she remembered the one
rescue she knew most about.
"Yeah, but it was worth it."
"And what about me?" she asked, slightly worried about which answer he would
give her.
"It was worth it too," he reassured her, then turned serious. "You saved me
twice on Wayland, Mara---."
"Thanks to your lessons-" she interrupted his attempt to thank her again.
"And to your former training," he commented. "If you hadn't been so skilled and
determinate, we wouldn't be here now," he finished earnestly.
While this trait of his personality exasperated her, it was not as it used to
be. She stared at him, miffed that he would try to make her the hero of this
adventure----- when something occurred to her.
"Is it why you trained me? Because you'd foreseen what I would have to do?"
He smiled softly. "No, but it felt like the right thing to do, so I followed my
feelings."
She nodded in understanding. Feelings, of course she should have known; ever
since she had begun to listen to him, he had insisted a lot on her following her
feelings...
"And you've helped me to get rid of the Voice. If I hadn't been ready for this
fight..."
She might still be plagued by it, she conceded somberly.
"I wish I had discovered about it sooner," Skywalker commented gently in the
silence.
Mara looked at him once again and searched his eyes; while she knew that he had
seen her nightmares, she still didn't know how he'd found out about the
persisting voice... She hadn't told him about that at all...
"I wouldn't have been ready to listen to you," she finally informed her friend.
"Even when you discovered the truth about the nightmares, I didn't listen to
you... Not yet anyway.... It was a living hell," she finished in barely a
whisper.
Luke listened attentively, indicating his understanding with nods.
"If only I had known-" he began.
Mara looked at him solicitously. "How would you have known, Skywalker? Nobody
knew except me, until you figured 'everything' out."
"Right."
A silence followed that admission, leaving Mara with the feeling that it was up
to her to start a new topic. She admitted to herself that she knew what they
could talk about, but she hesitated before opening it. She hadn't found the
answer to her question by herself, which frustrated her, and she could feel that
Luke would be able to help her, but she also suspected what his answer would
be... and wasn't convinced that she wanted to hear it from him.
In the end though, she gathered her courage and asked him: "What do we do now?".
His answer was as she expected it to be, but the extent of it surprised her.
"We could at least continue your training. You have a lot of potential, and
you've done extremely well up-to-now."
"Me? Potential? I thought that I was only sensitive to the Force?!" she gaped in
utter disbelief.
Skywalker shook his head. "No, if you wish, you can become a fully trained Jedi
Knight... I... guess the Emperor didn't want you to," her friend finished
glumly.
Of course, Mara nodded in agreement. If the fiend had manipulated her about
Skywalker and her uniqueness, then he had undoubtedly done so from the
beginning, starting with her abilities.
"Probably..." she agreed, feeling strangely distant. "I had no intention to
become a Dark Jedi like Vader either. I guess that's why he restrained my
training." She met the Jedi's gaze. "He even took the Force away from me when he
died, you know? And you... gave it back to me..." she realized even as she
focused slightly and felt the energy of the Force inhabit her soul once again.
And for the first time in years, she could feel that it would always be with
her. The young man told her that she was welcome, then a silence stretched
between them. Mara used it to consider his proposition from all angles.
In the end, the answer was easy and for her own benefit.
"Yes, I'd like to continue my training... for a while at least. But," she
warned, suddenly furrowing her brows and planting her fists on her hips. "I'm
not going to call you 'Master'."
Skywalker's reaction totally surprised her: he laughed.
Luke couldn't help it. He burst into uncontrollable laughter. It had never even
crossed his mind that she would call him anything special if he taught her. He
finally quieted down.
"I wouldn't want you to call me that; it wouldn't be right," he reassured her.
She kept her hands on her curved hips. "Oh, then what do I call you?" the
mesmerizingly beautiful young woman inquired with sarcasm.
"You can call me whatever you like, as long as it doesn't break your serenity."
He offered her his hand. "Deal?" he asked as he gazed straight into her jewel
eyes which were now freed from the pain they had hidden for too long.
When he offered her his hand, she dimly noticed the faint scars that were
adorning his arms and chest. She instantly wondered where they were coming from
and reflected that it would be interesting to compare their origin with the
origin of hers. A second later, she firmly took his hand in hers.
"Deal, Skywalker."
The moment she touched him, a nearly-overwhelming electricity coursed through
her whole body, making her tingly with desire. She suddenly had the irresistible
urge to pull him to herself and capture his lips in an hungry kiss---- She
hurriedly broke the physical touch. The urge disappeared.
There hadn't been anything romantic in it, she reflected, just an overwhelming
physical need. She also admitted that normally, she would have given in, but
not with him. She wanted to respect him.
She made a note to not touch him too often.
Meanwhile, Luke was as shocked as Mara was, even if he wasn't aware of her
feelings. He'd never thought that a simple handshake could be that electrifying.
While they had been holding hands, he had been aware of her like never before---
and her hand had felt extremely good in his.
He shook his head, almost imperceptibly. Why was he suddenly feeling this
attracted to her? Sure, she was beautiful, even captivating when considered as
a whole, body and soul, but even so, he didn't consider more than friendship
with her. Besides, he reminded himself, falling in love with Mara wouldn't be a
good idea since it the feeling wouldn't be mutual; a few days ago, he reminded
himself seriously, she had still wanted to kill him.
As he thought back to their first meeting, he felt a new blush creep up his
cheeks as he became aware that, whether he wanted it or not, he had fallen for
her the moment he had seen her. With her blaster aimed at him, she had looked
unlike any other woman he had ever seen before... and it had attracted him like
a moth to the flame...
Had he been alone at the moment, he reflected that he would fling his arms at
the sky in frustration. He was simply always attracted to the wrong women:
first, his sister, then a senator who had religious restrictions, and now,
someone who'd written a book about how to kill him the most efficient way.
Would he ever learn?, he asked himself sarcastically.
While Luke debated his experiences with women, Mara recovered from their touch
and noticed that he was also silent, probably to respect her, she reflected.
She decided to conclude the visit as soon as possible before her body did
something that she'd regret.
"So, when do we start?" she prompted him.
"As soon as you're ready." Luke answered, focusing back on her.
Mara couldn't help but smirk at that. "Once you're out of the medcenter of
course." she pointed out.
The face he made was priceless.
"Uh, yeah," he nodded sheepishly.
"Why are you still here anyway?"
Surely he hadn't been in worse shape than she had been, she reflected seriously.
However, as she noticed a new blush creep up his jaw, she considered the
possibility that she was wrong.
However, she was adamant about one thing: Skywalker really looked very boyish
and cute when he was blushing.
"Uh... Well, I'm waiting for my last check-up," he explained as he averted her
eyes and distractedly scratched his neck. "Since I'm known as a regular in the
medcenter, they don't let me off the hook without making sure that I'm truly
recovered," he finished with a sigh of frustration.
It made him that more endearing; her reaction irritated her once again. She had
to get out of here!, she thought, yet couldn't restrain her amused comment.
"Why? Farmboy has been bad in the past?"
Surprised by her choice of moniker, Luke quickly refocused on her; he noticed
her amused expression, then how her contained mirth made her look even more
radiant and enrapturing than she already was. He decided that he liked her
moniker and wouldn't complain about it. In fact, it liked it even better to
'Jedi' or 'Kid'.
"Uh, well, sometimes I've had to come back... after collapsing in the
corridor..." he admitted ruefully.
To his surprise... and delight, Mara chuckled, something which he had never seen
her do before.
"Your trick backfired on you?" she teased him mercilessly.
"I know, no need to rub it in," he answered mock-grumpily.
However, he was far from being upset at her; instead, he wanted to make her
pleasure last.
She deserved all the fun she could have, and more.
"Well then, take it easy, Farmboy," she commented with a smirk. "I wouldn't
want that to happen while we fight. Sure wouldn't want to end up killing you
because you had a relapse," she pointed out mock-seriously.
"Right," he nodded, slightly saddened by the fact that she was already leaving
yet knowing better than to try and keep her any longer than she wanted to.
"Now, I'm going to meet your sister. She told me that she had a proposal for
me," she informed him before raising an eyebrow in inquiry: "Any idea?"
"Nope," he smiled, elated at the prospect that Leia and Karrde's idea of a
smuggler alliance could involve Mara. That way, he thought earnestly, he would
have better chances of running into her again then and again.
Perhaps even more often than if he were only to try to train her as they had
just discussed.
"Okay, well, see you later!" she nodded once, then turned her back to him.
"Bye," he bid her, barely restraining his delighted smile from showing on his
face.
He watched her leave and hoped that he'd see her soon. Upon that thought,
another fiery blush inflamed his face and chest as it brought back home the fact
that if he weren't careful, he would 'really' fall in love with the fiery Mara
Jade... who would probably kill him if she ever found out what he was thinking
about.
Well, he sighed to himself as he leaned back in his pillows, if death had to
come to them all, then he'd choose a death for loving Mara Jade over anything
else.
An angel was worth such a sacrifice, he admitted wryly, naively, then caught
himself and forced himself to come back down to Coruscant and the real world.
As he refocused on his reports about the battle of the shipyards of Bilbringi,
he belatedly realized that it had been a long, long while since he had
daydreamed as he had used to on Tatooine.
A long time indeed, he smirked slightly before turning back to more serious
matters.
******
The next day, Mara wandered inside the former imperial palace, considering
Leia's offer.
Either the galaxy was against her, she fumed slightly, or Skywalker's kindness
was rubbing off on her; she hoped that it wasn't the latest option for it would
be quite infuriating considering her former persona.
Organa Solo's offer was very interesting though. On the positive side, she'd
get all the freedom and the action she wanted while still being able to work on
her trading idea as well as train a little bit with the Jedi; on the negative
side, she would be working close-quarters with the New Republic, which she still
didn't like that much, and possibly Skywalker, who was having more than just a
physical effect on her. Training with him was one thing, but going off in
missions with him was quite another...
In fact, it was making her nervous.
She stopped her train of thoughts on this one. Her? Nervous?
No, she shook her head. The cool-headed Emperor's Hand couldn't be nervous, and
yet, she reflected as she allowed herself to analyze her worry, she had never
had to interact with a friend before. Up to now, her interactions had been
limited to giving orders to officers and rulers, reporting and obeying her
master, and insulting her victims.
Not much small talk, she pouted.
Still, she wondered seriously, would she sacrifice her freedom and dream because
she didn't want to risk the possibility of spending much time with the Jedi? Not
in her life, she decided. Besides, she had yet to resolve her ongoing conflict
between her head and her regenerated heart.
Yes, Skywalker represented a danger, she admitted to herself, and yet,... she
had found herself missing his company the previous evening, much to her
frustration. However, she could admit that after their latest talk and the
moniker that she had chosen for him, a moniker which already fit him to
perfection, she really wanted to know him better... to know the farmboy, not
just the Jedi and kind man.
And speaking of farmboy, she reflected as she pondered her other option, if she
did say no to the offer, if she instead simply trained a bit with the Jedi and
left, she'd be free to track down her Tatooine farm boy and bring him back with
her...
And what was she thinking?, she berated herself. The boy had grown and probably
had a life of his own now, a life she had 'no' right to ruin because she was
still lusting for him after all those years of desertion. The Emperor's Hand
wouldn't have hesitated to do that, but the reborn Mara Jade wasn't feeling
overjoyed by such a prospect.
No, she shook her head in sadness, she couldn't go after him. She had lost him,
plain and simple... had even never really had him in the first place.
Besides, she tried to hearten herself, he would be too easy to conquer... not
challenging enough.
... Skywalker on the other hand, she thought almost reflexively before she could
quash her idea. Now there was quite an interesting prospect---- if she were to
chase him at all of course, she amended coolly to keep herself in check.
However, she had to concede that she rather liked the fact that the Jedi was far
from helpless, could withstand her tricks... and that he 'knew' her, for real.
More important, she knew him better now. He was not just a Jedi with tricks up
his sleeve; he was a genuine human being, a very unique man who'd been through
much, and someone who was showing interest for her.
And real human interest at that, she reminded herself. The young man was not
only looking for a business relationship or a potential-oriented one. Despite
his Jedi reputation... he had retained his boyishness from his early years.
Farmboy..., she smiled wistfully. It was funny how the moniker had come out
unbidden in the medcenter, and yet it fit him so well. Especially considering
the new side of his personality which she'd gotten a peak at in the medcenter.
He hadn't complained about it either while he had always given her almost pained
looks when she had sneered her 'Jedi' at him. Could he agree with her and like
that teasing address?, she wondered. He had sure never been that unresponsive
when even his Solo friend had called him 'Kid'.
All in all, she conceded as she looked around herself to see where she had
wandered, despite all her misgivings and instincts of protection, she wanted to
deepen her friendship with Skywalker, even if he would surely make it difficult
for her to remain at peace with herself.
Meanwhile, she realized that her feet had taken her down a corridor whose layout
she recognized. She turned toward the stairwell and headed for the 'secret'
access to the roof.
The moment that she opened the door, a strong wind buffeted in, blowing her hair
away from her even as it whipped at her short jacket. However, Mara didn't
notice any of this.
Her eyes were riveted on Imperial City at dusk, a vision of the past... yet she
was in its future now... in her present.
She was free from the Emperor, free to enjoy life as it had always been yet had
never been shown to her this way. Instead, Life, she realized, had always been
little more than a tool in her former life, beings and locations to use to her
advantage.
However, now that she was seeing it with her 'new' eyes as well as her more
sensitive senses, she could 'feel' the teeming energies of the beings who were
making the city live, could consider them as unique entities, aliens and humans
alike, trying to make their way through life as best they could.
And unlike what she had always been led to believe, their way of life wasn't
chaotic... but peaceful.
Reaching the edge of the roof, she leaned against it, then closed her eyes and
reveled in his new, vivid experience of peace.
Peace.
And Freedom.
******
(End of LAST COMMAND)
******
As she gazed at the lightsaber which Luke had just left in her care, Mara
considered what it meant...
And what about the strange electricity which she had felt again when they'd
touched again...? she wondered in confusion. What did it mean? And what was it
about 'this' man??, she asked the sky.
No one, and she meant 'no one', had ever made her weak in the knees like he
did... if only figuratively speaking. She had also never fantasized as much
about a man as she did about 'that' man... And now she wanted to train with
him?
Well, yes, she answered. Her, a Jedi... who would've thought?, she smiled shyly
as images of a brighter future danced in her mind. With him as her teacher, she
knew that it was possible... Everything seemed possible with him. That kind of
frightened her... but it also heartened her to know that she was not alone
anymore.
Perhaps, she conceded shyly, it was time to consider learning about love, true
love... but very cautiously of course because she certainly didn't want to fall
in the opposite trap of what her devotion to her master had been... That hated
man who had betrayed and almost destroyed her...
But Luke would never betray her, she reminded herself warmly, and unlike the
Emperor, he really didn't crave power...
Honesty, greatness and great built..., she thought as the dim memories of her
teenage dreams returned to her. Even then, she had never believed that she
would someday find a man who would match all her criteria; she had thought that
it had been wishful thinking, had hoped that it would be, thus discouraging her
from betraying her master... especially after her misadventure with the gentle
farmboy, who had been great, yes, and kind,... but somehow nothing that could
compare with what she had discovered in Skywalker.
Gods he was enrapturing, she admitted to herself as she remembered their recent
discussion. Even when not involved in a fight, there was a feline grace about
him, and his muscles... and gentleness... and eyes!.. and ----- Darn, she
couldn't believe, nor accept, how much she wanted him to be hers all of a
sudden----
'Sounds like love to me, Jade,' her conscience pointed out to her.
'Well, maybe, but I think it's more like a very strong physical attraction,' she
tried to defend herself.
'Yeah, right, you can't lie to me.'
'Oh, shut up!.. But he'd sure be a great conquest,' she admitted consciously.
And thinking about him... he was part of the future, with the New Republic and
all, and... well,...
"Hang on a minute. I'll come with you," she called out to the object of her
thoughts who had yet to re-enter the building.
And with those simple words, she knew that she had killed her former self.
The Emperor's Hand was no more.
TBC in Friendship part 1 to?
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