Feedback: Not necessary but always welcome and very, VERY, VERY, much
appreciated. :o)
Disclaimer: JAG and its characters belong to Paramount and CBS. No copyright
infringement intended, I'm simply borrowing these wonderful characters for the
amusement of fellow shippers everywhere.
Author's Note: Oh boy … it's been a REALLY long time. I'm SO sorry for that, I hadn't
planned to stay away this long. RL, particularly in the form of exams and term papers
were the culprit with the additional help of a … domineering aunt that have kept me away
as long as I have. But I'm back, and w/ the beginning of a new semester in site hopefully
in full swing. "Starcrossed Ch.2" is almost done, I'm afraid I can't say the same for "I
saw …" but I'll make an effort to get that going too. Anyhoo, enough chit chat, on w/ the
show.
***************************************
From Chapter 5
Thinking she was close enough to the rear of the elevator she leaned back, meeting with a
solid wall of what she could only describe as well built muscle instead of the metal she'd
expected.
Jumping away Mac went to whirl around only to be stopped by strong muscular arms
pulling her back to her former position. The man's arms tightened their hold around her
waist, one hand inadvertently brushing her left breast, as he bent his head to whisper,
"Not having a good morning Marine?"
The oh so familiar scent of him assailed her and any doubts she'd had as to his identity
were obliterated with those few whispered words.
While she was attempting to control her body's reactions to his proximity and get her
mind to wrap around his actions as well as come up with an answer to his question, the
doors dinged open. Before she knew it he'd whisked right past her and she was left
dazed and questioning … had Harmon Rabb Jr. just copped a feel?
***************************************
"Cupid's Arrow" ~ Chapter 6
1400HRS ZULU (0900HRS EST)
Monday, February 15th 2002
JAG Headquarters
Falls Church, VA
Wings twitching, Eros watched as Sarah leaned back on to the Commander and jumped
along with her when she started forward after realizing that there was human flesh behind
her instead of the elevator wall she'd expected.
His surprise was soon replaced by a tinge of worry and maybe even anger as he saw the
Sailor reach out and grab her, pulling her back in to the folds of his arms. Taking a step
forward to intervene on his Sarah's behalf he was halted by the restraining arm of his
mother, whose presence he'd forgotten in the tension filled minutes.
"He won't hurt her, you know that as well as I." As he opened his mouth to object, to
remind her that the naval officer * had * hurt Sarah, his mother shushed him. "Ah-ah-ah!
Emotional hurt aside you know damn well that he would never lay a hand on her in
anger, or with dark intent!" Aphrodite's voice rose at her son's ludicrous behavior. She'd
never seen him so overly protective. But if she were being honest with herself, it touched
her old heart to see him this way and if she didn't know with every pore of her being that
Sarah belonged with Harmon she would have chucked Zeus's orders aside and gone
about ensuring that Eros's Sarah truly was 'his'.
At his downtrodden look, Aphrodite took Eros's hands in hers. "Eros … look. Look at
your Sarah and tell me she isn't exactly where she was created to be."
Looking up Eros hazarded a glance at Sarah and he saw the truth of his mother's words.
Despite looking slightly out of sorts-which he was sure was caused by the Commander's
out of character behavior more than being in his arms- Sarah looked at peace. Confused
but at peace. Plus he could see the waves of erotic heat coming off her. She was turned
on! Blushing at this observation he was about to turn back to his mother when quick as
lightening the Commander strode out of the elevator, it having arrived at their
destination, leaving behind a very dazed marine.
"What the …?" "H can't just leave her like that!!" Eros was outraged at the officer's
behavior. Surely after holding Sarah and whispering enticingly into her ear the
Commander, at the very least, should have implied that their elevator occurrence was
something to be discussed at a later time. "An officer and a gentleman my arse!"
"EROS, calm!" Aphrodite ordered. He hadn't noticed it but as his ire grew Eros's wings
had begun to flap and at an incredible rate at that, making it quite uncomfortable for
Aphrodite's continued presence by his side and hazardous for the mortal still remaining.
Realizing this, he glanced at Sarah to see if his loss of control had affected her any.
"Mother!" He yelped, for there before them lay Sarah Mackenzie, crumpled against the
far wall.
Aphrodite, for her part, after realizing Sarah's state looked up to see if anyone had
happened to notice the goings-on within the tiny contraption. Only then noting that the
elevator doors had closed, and looking up at the numbers ticking off she realized it had
done so not so long ago. Waving a hand she stilled the box completely and walked over
to her son, kneeling over his precious mortal.
"Come on Sarah, wake up." Feeling his way down her left side, the side from which
she'd hit the wall, he noted that she'd managed to pop her shoulder and bruise her ribs.
"Mother damn it, why didn't you tell me my wings were so out of control!!!" He
bellowed feeling Aphrodite beside him.
"I did!" She shot back defensively. Though a part of her regretted it immediately. He
was hurting at seeing his beloved battered and bruised. Sighing she attempted to push
him aside so she could heal the Marine but he would have none of it.
"You go and attend to the Commander, see why he mucked up this chance. I'll attend to
my Sarah." He ordered without turning, still holding Sarah within his arms.
Sighing, knowing she'd get nowhere with her stubborn son when his mind was made up
she straightened and readied to orbe out, but not before giving a parting shot.
"Remember, Eros, she isn't * your * Sarah."
Letting out his own sigh, he bent his head and whispered. "No, she isn't my Sarah. But
until that sailor wizens up, she is mine to protect. And protect her I shall."
Remembering the peace he'd felt from Sarah's heart when she was encased in her sailor's
arms, Eros vowed that he would ensure the success of this coupling. Even if he had to
break every rule Zeus had set before him, including … appearing before the naval mortal
himself.
*******
Harm made a beeline for his office, barely acknowledging Harriet and Bud's morning
greetings. Closing the door behind him, he pulled the blinds shut, and dumped his
briefcase and cover on the table before collapsing in to the chair behind his desk.
Staring listlessly out the window in his office his actions in the elevator finally hit him
completely. "Nooooo." The moan barely conveyed the woe in his heart.
"What have you done Rabb?" Shutting his eyes he let his head fall in to his hands while
willing the outside world away. .
Harm had no idea what had possessed him to … grope his partner a few short moments
ago. She was just oh so close and oh so … accessible, looking simply delicious in her
frazzled state, but … "What on God's green earth were you thinking?!?!"
There had been many a time since he'd known Sarah Mackenzie that he'd fantasized
about taking her in the elevator … the elevator, on his desk, on her desk, on the
Admiral's desk, heck even in Admiral Morris' courtroom. Harm had rarely been more
aroused in his life than when watching Mac argue passionately in court. And unlike those
many other times, when he'd just pushed the thought aside, shoved it deep down in to his
psyche, he'd acted. He'd pulled her back in to his embrace and toped it off daringly by
whispering enticingly in her ear. Almost willing her to turn and make a move, but before
she could answer him or he could further his actions the elevator dinged open and with it
some of his sanity returned.
"What am I going to do?" He whispered forlornly. How could he have let this happen?
He'd never lost control like that, not with Mac, never with Mac.
{Who you feeding the bull to Rabb!}
Okay if he was being honest, he had lost control, once … ah hell, completely honest-
twice. The image of Mac in a naval uniform came unbidden to his mind and with it the
feel of her soft, giving lips. She'd willingly allowed him such an intimate touch thinking
he'd needed it in order to say goodbye, how wrong she'd been. That kiss nor any he'd
envisioned having with Mac since their partnership began had nothing to do with Diane.
Nothing at all. He'd needed to … feel her, reassure himself that she-Mac, not Diane- was
truly there, and he'd taken advantage of her to do so.
{Yeah, taking advantage that's exactly what you've been doing since you met her.} His
conscience sneered at him again.
He wanted to protest, stand up and shout out vehemently that he'd never take advantage
of Mac, his Marine, never … but the kiss he'd stolen from her on the Admiral's porch, at
the celebration of her engagement, to another no less, stated otherwise. She'd been upset,
saddened. She'd meant for it to be a simple goodbye gesture, but he wouldn't, couldn't
leave it at that … he was desperate.
"Desperate- that about covers how you feel when it comes to her." Getting up he strode
over to his window and leaning his head against it he brought up a hand to his chest,
above where his heart lay, and rubbed at it. He felt empty. The slight ache he'd learned
to live with since he'd left for flying, that had changed in its degree since he'd returned
seemed to have disappeared, to be replaced by … emptiness.
But back there, in the elevator with Mac, for a few short minutes, he'd felt … free. Free
of all the restrictions … fears that had held him back from her. Free to love her, to show
… express it to her. And in doing so, he'd felt whole … his heart had felt whole. For the
first time since he was six, he'd felt completely whole and at peace.
"Sarah …" He blinked his eyes in an attempt to rid himself of the tears that threatened to
fall at the revelation. It was too late now. Too late, she'd taken her love back that's why
he felt empty now, empty and … numb.
"But the elevator …" Even as he voiced the reminder, the more, pessimistic, realistic part
of his psyche quashed the hope the thought had brought. {Once in a lifetime occurrence.
A fluke. Are you ready to bare you heart to her? Are you ready to … let go?}
The desperation that arose from his inability to answer his own question consumed him,
nearly bringing him to his knees. The tears he'd managed to fend up to that point
escaped.
"No, no. You're a grown man damn it! Enough with the tears!!" He could feel the panic
from his nightmares over the weekend return. Breathing was fastly becoming too difficult
a task to manage. Just when he thought he was going to pass out from hyperventilating
… he felt it. A calm … a familiar calm, accompanied by the scent of jasmine and spice.
Mac. Sarah.
Knowing the impossibility of Mac being in his office, or her scent lingering from past
visits, he was tempted to dismiss the very idea, but … it WAS * her * scent, and he
desperately needed the comfort it brought, that it always brought. So he let it. Let it seep
its way through his being with every deep, long breath he took.
"Commander, time for the staff meeting." Harriett's voice filtered through the door. He
was startled by it but grateful. He would have forgotten if not for her coming to inform
him so.
"Thanks Harriett, I'll be there in a few." Harm was amazed at how steady his voice was,
sure that it would be fraught with the sorrow that had consumed him.
Straightening he pushed away from the window and after a good shake of his head to
clear the fog there, he gathered the necessary files and headed out.
Going to open the door, his arm stilled. Stepping back he reached over his desk in to the
first drawer and pulled out a mirror Mac had given him ages ago as a way of making a
point about his Narcissistic behavior during a particular case. He'd kept it close because
it was from her, now he was simply grateful to have a chance to make sure that it wasn't
too apparent he'd had a crying fest in his office behind closed doors.
"What the …?" There wasn't a tear track in sight. The image reflected back at him was
as fresh as that of the one that had left his home, as fresh as Harmon Rabb could look
with his heart decimated. His eyes weren't even in the slightest bit red or puffy.
"This doesn't make sense."
"Harm you coming?"
{Sturgis.} Realizing he must be cutting it close he quickly shoved the hand held mirror
back in place and opened the door wide, plastering as big a smile as he could manage.
"I'm coming. Since when do you wait for me?"
"Well … never, but I really didn't wanta spend any time alone with the only other officer
I knew would be there earlier than me today."
"Singer." At Sturgis's sheepish nod, Harm couldn't help the chuckle that erupted. Other
than Mac, Sturgis was the only other person he knew who was quite … stoic about their
emotions, especially at work. Turner was never one to let his personal feelings interfere
with his actions or treatment of personal while on the job, but Singer had always been
one to try anyone's tolerance.
"Enough said. Come on then, no need to hold up everyone." With a wave of his hand,
indicating Sturgis to walk ahead of him, Harm followed.
"We're not the only ones."
Harm simply raised an eyebrow in question.
"Mac hasn't left her office since she … floated in." Sturgis had no other way of
explaining Mac's entrance this morning. She hadn't looked like she was 'all' there. It was
the oddest experience, well check that, it most definitely was no more odd than her
psychically solving their first case together. THAT was by far the most odd experience of
his life. Today was just, out of the ordinary for the Marine. Her walk was always so …
sturdy, fast-paced, and determined. It embodied the Marine herself. But this morning, she
really seemed to look like she … floated in. Odd.
"Mac's not in the conference room already?" Sturgis's headshake in the negative didn't
help the sudden worry that filled him.
Slowing his pace Harm looked over his shoulder at Mac's office while mumbling, "She's
usually one of the first to arrive."
"She was late coming in this morning. Maybe it's just taking her a little longer to get
organized." Sturgis tried to reassure Harm, knowing his friend's overprotective
tendencies when it came to their resident Marine.
"Hmm. Maybe."
"Rabb, Turner, stop dawdling and move it!" Moving past both men AJ shot each of
them a glare. He'd had the very worst feeling after Mac's call this morning, that toady
was going to be one of 'those' days and he was damned if he was going to let that happen
without a fight.
Glancing at each other worriedly, Harm and Sturgis quickly followed the Admiral. Not
understanding how he could be in such a fowl mood so early on in the day, a day that
thus far seemed quite uneventful in all aspects of life as far as they could see.
Both Commanders were going to regret not appreciating the … quiet … because the
storm was definitely brewing.
And AJ, if he only knew exactly what the day held in store for him and the rest of his
staff, particularly his Chief of Staff, he would have called in sick, then again …
*********
"Ma'am, the Admiral's waiting to start the staff meeting … ma'am?"
Walking in to the office, Tiner approached the Colonel. "Ma'am?" Forgetting protocol in
his concern at her unresponsiveness, he reached out to lay a hand on her shoulder.
"Colonel Mackenzie?"
Mac startled at Tiner's touch, breaking her out of the comatose state she'd been in.
"What?!" The question coming out sharper than she'd intended to but in her current state
of … disorientation was unable to provide anything less severe.
Almost wilting at her bark he said. "Umm … the staff meeting ma'am, the Admiral's
waiting for you to come down."
Settling back in her chair she swiveled away from Tiner's gaze. {Focus Marine.}
Bringing her hands up to rub at her temple she happened to glance through her blinds and
right in to Harm's office. {Harm … HARM!!}
{Oh Gods!} She remembered … everything. Bumping in to him. His arms pulling her
back to his chiseled chest. His touch, his smell … his voice. Then he was gone, like an
apparition. And then nothing. Nothing at all. She had no memory whatsoever of making
it in to her office this morning. And no matter how enthralled she may have been, be,
with their resident jet-jock turned lawyer, he never left her with memory lapses.
Still staring at Harm's darkened office Mac addressed Tiner. "Did the Commander
manage to make it in yet, Petty Officer?"
"Yes ma'am. He made it in shortly before you did." Not quite understanding why she'd
asked to begin with. It wasn't her habit to keep track of the Commander's arrival times;
at least it hadn't been since his return from carrier duty after his change in designators.
At his answer she turned to face him, "You * saw * me coming in this morning?"
"Uhh … yes, ma'am. Umm, you strode in about five minutes after the Commander did."
Now completely lost, Tiner just stood there hoping to hurry their conversation along
before the Admiral bellowed for either of them. Too late.
"TINER WHEN I SAID GET THE COLONEL I WASN'T AWARE I WAS SENDING
YOU TO ICELAND TO DO IT!!"
"Oh boy."
Both officers winced at the Admiral's tone more than his words and looked sheepishly at
each other
"I'm sorry Jason, this is my fault. I didn't mean to keep you. Go ahead and tell him I'm
on my way, I'll take the heat for the delay."
Nodding his head in acquiescence he turned to leave her office but hesitated at her door.
"Petty Officer?"
Tiner let his head rise and fall twice before he was able to gather enough courage to ask
the question he wanted to. Emboldened by their current predicament, knowing the longer
he took the deeper he'd be in with the Admiral, he finally managed in a rush.
"Areyouallrightma'am?"
He hadn't forgotten Friday night, and though she seemed a lot more rested, there was
something decisively different about her that he couldn't quite pinpoint. Her earlier
spaceyness and the odd questions she'd asked of him had just added on to his worry.
Reassuring Tiner with a soft smile, Mac shoved him out the door while saying, "Hurry
before the next bellow, it might just bring the building down!"
Relieved that things were all right, more than all right with her if she was jesting. It'd
been too long since he'd last heard her joking and it was quite a welcome return. "Aye,
aye ma'am"
Gathering all the necessary things she was ready to dash out of her office when she
happened to note the almost crystal like feather lying underneath her windowsill.
Bending to pick it up Mac paused when she saw the light glint off something underneath
the feather, picking it up cautiously, along with the feather she held it up to the light
streaming through the window and was startled to see that it looked like … an arrowhead.
"Now how the heck did you end up here, both of you?" she pondered out loud, not at all
thinking it odd- posing a question to inanimate objects.
"MACKENZIE YOU PLAN ON JOINING US ANYTIME SOON??!!"
Shooting up at the sudden bellow, Mac's head connected with the windowsill. Rubbing
her war wound she gathered everything she'd dropped in her surprise and hurried out of
her office. For the moment completely forgetting her elevator encounter with Harm. A
fact she would live to regret * very * soon.
Tbc …???
A/N2: Okay guys, what do ya think? I'm afraid I might be a little rusty, but I'm hoping
this was still an acceptable chapter and you all did manage to enjoy it. I also wanted to
give one big shout out in thanks for all your wonderful feedback: "THANK YOU!!!"
This story had 45 reviews before my account crashed and 9 since I reloaded the chapters,
more than I could have ever hoped or imagined for. I can't fully express how
overwhelmed and exceedingly happy they made me feel. Sadly, I didn't save any of the
reviews in my email account thinking I could always view them directly, obviously I
didn't take in to consideration all possible scenarios, so no personal thanks you's this
time round. Sorry!:o( But look fwd to them w/ the next chapter! * BG * Later chums!
appreciated. :o)
Disclaimer: JAG and its characters belong to Paramount and CBS. No copyright
infringement intended, I'm simply borrowing these wonderful characters for the
amusement of fellow shippers everywhere.
Author's Note: Oh boy … it's been a REALLY long time. I'm SO sorry for that, I hadn't
planned to stay away this long. RL, particularly in the form of exams and term papers
were the culprit with the additional help of a … domineering aunt that have kept me away
as long as I have. But I'm back, and w/ the beginning of a new semester in site hopefully
in full swing. "Starcrossed Ch.2" is almost done, I'm afraid I can't say the same for "I
saw …" but I'll make an effort to get that going too. Anyhoo, enough chit chat, on w/ the
show.
***************************************
From Chapter 5
Thinking she was close enough to the rear of the elevator she leaned back, meeting with a
solid wall of what she could only describe as well built muscle instead of the metal she'd
expected.
Jumping away Mac went to whirl around only to be stopped by strong muscular arms
pulling her back to her former position. The man's arms tightened their hold around her
waist, one hand inadvertently brushing her left breast, as he bent his head to whisper,
"Not having a good morning Marine?"
The oh so familiar scent of him assailed her and any doubts she'd had as to his identity
were obliterated with those few whispered words.
While she was attempting to control her body's reactions to his proximity and get her
mind to wrap around his actions as well as come up with an answer to his question, the
doors dinged open. Before she knew it he'd whisked right past her and she was left
dazed and questioning … had Harmon Rabb Jr. just copped a feel?
***************************************
"Cupid's Arrow" ~ Chapter 6
1400HRS ZULU (0900HRS EST)
Monday, February 15th 2002
JAG Headquarters
Falls Church, VA
Wings twitching, Eros watched as Sarah leaned back on to the Commander and jumped
along with her when she started forward after realizing that there was human flesh behind
her instead of the elevator wall she'd expected.
His surprise was soon replaced by a tinge of worry and maybe even anger as he saw the
Sailor reach out and grab her, pulling her back in to the folds of his arms. Taking a step
forward to intervene on his Sarah's behalf he was halted by the restraining arm of his
mother, whose presence he'd forgotten in the tension filled minutes.
"He won't hurt her, you know that as well as I." As he opened his mouth to object, to
remind her that the naval officer * had * hurt Sarah, his mother shushed him. "Ah-ah-ah!
Emotional hurt aside you know damn well that he would never lay a hand on her in
anger, or with dark intent!" Aphrodite's voice rose at her son's ludicrous behavior. She'd
never seen him so overly protective. But if she were being honest with herself, it touched
her old heart to see him this way and if she didn't know with every pore of her being that
Sarah belonged with Harmon she would have chucked Zeus's orders aside and gone
about ensuring that Eros's Sarah truly was 'his'.
At his downtrodden look, Aphrodite took Eros's hands in hers. "Eros … look. Look at
your Sarah and tell me she isn't exactly where she was created to be."
Looking up Eros hazarded a glance at Sarah and he saw the truth of his mother's words.
Despite looking slightly out of sorts-which he was sure was caused by the Commander's
out of character behavior more than being in his arms- Sarah looked at peace. Confused
but at peace. Plus he could see the waves of erotic heat coming off her. She was turned
on! Blushing at this observation he was about to turn back to his mother when quick as
lightening the Commander strode out of the elevator, it having arrived at their
destination, leaving behind a very dazed marine.
"What the …?" "H can't just leave her like that!!" Eros was outraged at the officer's
behavior. Surely after holding Sarah and whispering enticingly into her ear the
Commander, at the very least, should have implied that their elevator occurrence was
something to be discussed at a later time. "An officer and a gentleman my arse!"
"EROS, calm!" Aphrodite ordered. He hadn't noticed it but as his ire grew Eros's wings
had begun to flap and at an incredible rate at that, making it quite uncomfortable for
Aphrodite's continued presence by his side and hazardous for the mortal still remaining.
Realizing this, he glanced at Sarah to see if his loss of control had affected her any.
"Mother!" He yelped, for there before them lay Sarah Mackenzie, crumpled against the
far wall.
Aphrodite, for her part, after realizing Sarah's state looked up to see if anyone had
happened to notice the goings-on within the tiny contraption. Only then noting that the
elevator doors had closed, and looking up at the numbers ticking off she realized it had
done so not so long ago. Waving a hand she stilled the box completely and walked over
to her son, kneeling over his precious mortal.
"Come on Sarah, wake up." Feeling his way down her left side, the side from which
she'd hit the wall, he noted that she'd managed to pop her shoulder and bruise her ribs.
"Mother damn it, why didn't you tell me my wings were so out of control!!!" He
bellowed feeling Aphrodite beside him.
"I did!" She shot back defensively. Though a part of her regretted it immediately. He
was hurting at seeing his beloved battered and bruised. Sighing she attempted to push
him aside so she could heal the Marine but he would have none of it.
"You go and attend to the Commander, see why he mucked up this chance. I'll attend to
my Sarah." He ordered without turning, still holding Sarah within his arms.
Sighing, knowing she'd get nowhere with her stubborn son when his mind was made up
she straightened and readied to orbe out, but not before giving a parting shot.
"Remember, Eros, she isn't * your * Sarah."
Letting out his own sigh, he bent his head and whispered. "No, she isn't my Sarah. But
until that sailor wizens up, she is mine to protect. And protect her I shall."
Remembering the peace he'd felt from Sarah's heart when she was encased in her sailor's
arms, Eros vowed that he would ensure the success of this coupling. Even if he had to
break every rule Zeus had set before him, including … appearing before the naval mortal
himself.
*******
Harm made a beeline for his office, barely acknowledging Harriet and Bud's morning
greetings. Closing the door behind him, he pulled the blinds shut, and dumped his
briefcase and cover on the table before collapsing in to the chair behind his desk.
Staring listlessly out the window in his office his actions in the elevator finally hit him
completely. "Nooooo." The moan barely conveyed the woe in his heart.
"What have you done Rabb?" Shutting his eyes he let his head fall in to his hands while
willing the outside world away. .
Harm had no idea what had possessed him to … grope his partner a few short moments
ago. She was just oh so close and oh so … accessible, looking simply delicious in her
frazzled state, but … "What on God's green earth were you thinking?!?!"
There had been many a time since he'd known Sarah Mackenzie that he'd fantasized
about taking her in the elevator … the elevator, on his desk, on her desk, on the
Admiral's desk, heck even in Admiral Morris' courtroom. Harm had rarely been more
aroused in his life than when watching Mac argue passionately in court. And unlike those
many other times, when he'd just pushed the thought aside, shoved it deep down in to his
psyche, he'd acted. He'd pulled her back in to his embrace and toped it off daringly by
whispering enticingly in her ear. Almost willing her to turn and make a move, but before
she could answer him or he could further his actions the elevator dinged open and with it
some of his sanity returned.
"What am I going to do?" He whispered forlornly. How could he have let this happen?
He'd never lost control like that, not with Mac, never with Mac.
{Who you feeding the bull to Rabb!}
Okay if he was being honest, he had lost control, once … ah hell, completely honest-
twice. The image of Mac in a naval uniform came unbidden to his mind and with it the
feel of her soft, giving lips. She'd willingly allowed him such an intimate touch thinking
he'd needed it in order to say goodbye, how wrong she'd been. That kiss nor any he'd
envisioned having with Mac since their partnership began had nothing to do with Diane.
Nothing at all. He'd needed to … feel her, reassure himself that she-Mac, not Diane- was
truly there, and he'd taken advantage of her to do so.
{Yeah, taking advantage that's exactly what you've been doing since you met her.} His
conscience sneered at him again.
He wanted to protest, stand up and shout out vehemently that he'd never take advantage
of Mac, his Marine, never … but the kiss he'd stolen from her on the Admiral's porch, at
the celebration of her engagement, to another no less, stated otherwise. She'd been upset,
saddened. She'd meant for it to be a simple goodbye gesture, but he wouldn't, couldn't
leave it at that … he was desperate.
"Desperate- that about covers how you feel when it comes to her." Getting up he strode
over to his window and leaning his head against it he brought up a hand to his chest,
above where his heart lay, and rubbed at it. He felt empty. The slight ache he'd learned
to live with since he'd left for flying, that had changed in its degree since he'd returned
seemed to have disappeared, to be replaced by … emptiness.
But back there, in the elevator with Mac, for a few short minutes, he'd felt … free. Free
of all the restrictions … fears that had held him back from her. Free to love her, to show
… express it to her. And in doing so, he'd felt whole … his heart had felt whole. For the
first time since he was six, he'd felt completely whole and at peace.
"Sarah …" He blinked his eyes in an attempt to rid himself of the tears that threatened to
fall at the revelation. It was too late now. Too late, she'd taken her love back that's why
he felt empty now, empty and … numb.
"But the elevator …" Even as he voiced the reminder, the more, pessimistic, realistic part
of his psyche quashed the hope the thought had brought. {Once in a lifetime occurrence.
A fluke. Are you ready to bare you heart to her? Are you ready to … let go?}
The desperation that arose from his inability to answer his own question consumed him,
nearly bringing him to his knees. The tears he'd managed to fend up to that point
escaped.
"No, no. You're a grown man damn it! Enough with the tears!!" He could feel the panic
from his nightmares over the weekend return. Breathing was fastly becoming too difficult
a task to manage. Just when he thought he was going to pass out from hyperventilating
… he felt it. A calm … a familiar calm, accompanied by the scent of jasmine and spice.
Mac. Sarah.
Knowing the impossibility of Mac being in his office, or her scent lingering from past
visits, he was tempted to dismiss the very idea, but … it WAS * her * scent, and he
desperately needed the comfort it brought, that it always brought. So he let it. Let it seep
its way through his being with every deep, long breath he took.
"Commander, time for the staff meeting." Harriett's voice filtered through the door. He
was startled by it but grateful. He would have forgotten if not for her coming to inform
him so.
"Thanks Harriett, I'll be there in a few." Harm was amazed at how steady his voice was,
sure that it would be fraught with the sorrow that had consumed him.
Straightening he pushed away from the window and after a good shake of his head to
clear the fog there, he gathered the necessary files and headed out.
Going to open the door, his arm stilled. Stepping back he reached over his desk in to the
first drawer and pulled out a mirror Mac had given him ages ago as a way of making a
point about his Narcissistic behavior during a particular case. He'd kept it close because
it was from her, now he was simply grateful to have a chance to make sure that it wasn't
too apparent he'd had a crying fest in his office behind closed doors.
"What the …?" There wasn't a tear track in sight. The image reflected back at him was
as fresh as that of the one that had left his home, as fresh as Harmon Rabb could look
with his heart decimated. His eyes weren't even in the slightest bit red or puffy.
"This doesn't make sense."
"Harm you coming?"
{Sturgis.} Realizing he must be cutting it close he quickly shoved the hand held mirror
back in place and opened the door wide, plastering as big a smile as he could manage.
"I'm coming. Since when do you wait for me?"
"Well … never, but I really didn't wanta spend any time alone with the only other officer
I knew would be there earlier than me today."
"Singer." At Sturgis's sheepish nod, Harm couldn't help the chuckle that erupted. Other
than Mac, Sturgis was the only other person he knew who was quite … stoic about their
emotions, especially at work. Turner was never one to let his personal feelings interfere
with his actions or treatment of personal while on the job, but Singer had always been
one to try anyone's tolerance.
"Enough said. Come on then, no need to hold up everyone." With a wave of his hand,
indicating Sturgis to walk ahead of him, Harm followed.
"We're not the only ones."
Harm simply raised an eyebrow in question.
"Mac hasn't left her office since she … floated in." Sturgis had no other way of
explaining Mac's entrance this morning. She hadn't looked like she was 'all' there. It was
the oddest experience, well check that, it most definitely was no more odd than her
psychically solving their first case together. THAT was by far the most odd experience of
his life. Today was just, out of the ordinary for the Marine. Her walk was always so …
sturdy, fast-paced, and determined. It embodied the Marine herself. But this morning, she
really seemed to look like she … floated in. Odd.
"Mac's not in the conference room already?" Sturgis's headshake in the negative didn't
help the sudden worry that filled him.
Slowing his pace Harm looked over his shoulder at Mac's office while mumbling, "She's
usually one of the first to arrive."
"She was late coming in this morning. Maybe it's just taking her a little longer to get
organized." Sturgis tried to reassure Harm, knowing his friend's overprotective
tendencies when it came to their resident Marine.
"Hmm. Maybe."
"Rabb, Turner, stop dawdling and move it!" Moving past both men AJ shot each of
them a glare. He'd had the very worst feeling after Mac's call this morning, that toady
was going to be one of 'those' days and he was damned if he was going to let that happen
without a fight.
Glancing at each other worriedly, Harm and Sturgis quickly followed the Admiral. Not
understanding how he could be in such a fowl mood so early on in the day, a day that
thus far seemed quite uneventful in all aspects of life as far as they could see.
Both Commanders were going to regret not appreciating the … quiet … because the
storm was definitely brewing.
And AJ, if he only knew exactly what the day held in store for him and the rest of his
staff, particularly his Chief of Staff, he would have called in sick, then again …
*********
"Ma'am, the Admiral's waiting to start the staff meeting … ma'am?"
Walking in to the office, Tiner approached the Colonel. "Ma'am?" Forgetting protocol in
his concern at her unresponsiveness, he reached out to lay a hand on her shoulder.
"Colonel Mackenzie?"
Mac startled at Tiner's touch, breaking her out of the comatose state she'd been in.
"What?!" The question coming out sharper than she'd intended to but in her current state
of … disorientation was unable to provide anything less severe.
Almost wilting at her bark he said. "Umm … the staff meeting ma'am, the Admiral's
waiting for you to come down."
Settling back in her chair she swiveled away from Tiner's gaze. {Focus Marine.}
Bringing her hands up to rub at her temple she happened to glance through her blinds and
right in to Harm's office. {Harm … HARM!!}
{Oh Gods!} She remembered … everything. Bumping in to him. His arms pulling her
back to his chiseled chest. His touch, his smell … his voice. Then he was gone, like an
apparition. And then nothing. Nothing at all. She had no memory whatsoever of making
it in to her office this morning. And no matter how enthralled she may have been, be,
with their resident jet-jock turned lawyer, he never left her with memory lapses.
Still staring at Harm's darkened office Mac addressed Tiner. "Did the Commander
manage to make it in yet, Petty Officer?"
"Yes ma'am. He made it in shortly before you did." Not quite understanding why she'd
asked to begin with. It wasn't her habit to keep track of the Commander's arrival times;
at least it hadn't been since his return from carrier duty after his change in designators.
At his answer she turned to face him, "You * saw * me coming in this morning?"
"Uhh … yes, ma'am. Umm, you strode in about five minutes after the Commander did."
Now completely lost, Tiner just stood there hoping to hurry their conversation along
before the Admiral bellowed for either of them. Too late.
"TINER WHEN I SAID GET THE COLONEL I WASN'T AWARE I WAS SENDING
YOU TO ICELAND TO DO IT!!"
"Oh boy."
Both officers winced at the Admiral's tone more than his words and looked sheepishly at
each other
"I'm sorry Jason, this is my fault. I didn't mean to keep you. Go ahead and tell him I'm
on my way, I'll take the heat for the delay."
Nodding his head in acquiescence he turned to leave her office but hesitated at her door.
"Petty Officer?"
Tiner let his head rise and fall twice before he was able to gather enough courage to ask
the question he wanted to. Emboldened by their current predicament, knowing the longer
he took the deeper he'd be in with the Admiral, he finally managed in a rush.
"Areyouallrightma'am?"
He hadn't forgotten Friday night, and though she seemed a lot more rested, there was
something decisively different about her that he couldn't quite pinpoint. Her earlier
spaceyness and the odd questions she'd asked of him had just added on to his worry.
Reassuring Tiner with a soft smile, Mac shoved him out the door while saying, "Hurry
before the next bellow, it might just bring the building down!"
Relieved that things were all right, more than all right with her if she was jesting. It'd
been too long since he'd last heard her joking and it was quite a welcome return. "Aye,
aye ma'am"
Gathering all the necessary things she was ready to dash out of her office when she
happened to note the almost crystal like feather lying underneath her windowsill.
Bending to pick it up Mac paused when she saw the light glint off something underneath
the feather, picking it up cautiously, along with the feather she held it up to the light
streaming through the window and was startled to see that it looked like … an arrowhead.
"Now how the heck did you end up here, both of you?" she pondered out loud, not at all
thinking it odd- posing a question to inanimate objects.
"MACKENZIE YOU PLAN ON JOINING US ANYTIME SOON??!!"
Shooting up at the sudden bellow, Mac's head connected with the windowsill. Rubbing
her war wound she gathered everything she'd dropped in her surprise and hurried out of
her office. For the moment completely forgetting her elevator encounter with Harm. A
fact she would live to regret * very * soon.
Tbc …???
A/N2: Okay guys, what do ya think? I'm afraid I might be a little rusty, but I'm hoping
this was still an acceptable chapter and you all did manage to enjoy it. I also wanted to
give one big shout out in thanks for all your wonderful feedback: "THANK YOU!!!"
This story had 45 reviews before my account crashed and 9 since I reloaded the chapters,
more than I could have ever hoped or imagined for. I can't fully express how
overwhelmed and exceedingly happy they made me feel. Sadly, I didn't save any of the
reviews in my email account thinking I could always view them directly, obviously I
didn't take in to consideration all possible scenarios, so no personal thanks you's this
time round. Sorry!:o( But look fwd to them w/ the next chapter! * BG * Later chums!