Email: swythangel@hotmail.com
Title: Götterdammerüng (Twilight of the Gods)
Type: Series 10/?
Teaser: With their return to Weiß, Ken and Ran find old feelings resurfacing...
Rating: PG (just to be safe)
Spoilers: I don't know, let's just assume there is
Warnings: Strong Language, Shonen Ai leaning towards Yaoi
Keywords: Ken, Aya/Ran, Youji, Ran/AyaxKen, YoujixKen, angst, a lil fluff
Yatta ne, minna! I actually did Götterdammerüng! Ahoho! I'm so happy and this is good and long too.
Happy Valentine's Day everyone!
Real life got ahold of me so much that I rarely have time to do my fics sniffs> and so I was wondering if it would be ok for me to drop "Despite Everything" from my fic commitments since it is too sappy in the first place. And I don't want to drop Götterdammerüng since this is my first Weiß baby. Tell me what you guys think?
Götterdammerüng
(Twilight of the Gods)
Part 10
[Omi]
/I am not an eavesdropper. I really am not./
I tell myself over and over as I input data into my laptop in preparation for tonight. I am valiantly trying to tune out the words Ran-kun and Ken-kun are saying, trying to make myself as small as I can beside the car.
But as much as I try, the words reach me. Such is the disadvantage of deepening twilight. Nothing moved or made a sound, amplifying Ran-kun's and Ken-kun's voices. Should have anticipated that Ken-kun would ask Ran-kun for a few minutes.
"If its about the mission, Ken, we can 'talk' about that when we are enroute to the mission."
"Its not about that.Its about us."
I can't help but feel sorry for Ken-kun at the coldness in Ran-kun's voice. Somehow I knew he'd be hurt by it. But I understand why Ran-kun is angry too.
I was surprised at what I had seen, who wouldn't be? Youji-kun kissing Ken-kun…if it had been Ran-kun I wouldn't have been so surprised but Youji?
Maybe surprised is not the word. I am astounded and shocked. Youji-kun knows that Ken-kun loves Ran-kun and Ran-kun loves Ken-kun, however hard they might try to hide it. That's why I couldn't help the accusatory glare I threw Youji-kun's way before stalking after Ran-kun.
"Ran? You will talk with me won't you?"
"After the mission, Ken. We'll talk after the mission."
/That's the way, Ran-kun. Give Ken-kun a chance! Youji-kun is getting a scolding from me too, once this mission is over too./
But now, I have to concentrate on the mission. I need to assign quadrants and tasks for tonight.
Its not easy though. I'm trying to manipulate the team so I can give Ken-kun the cushier job. He's too pale, even now, and I don't want him to faint again. Especially since Zeiger is going to be a bitch to penetrate.
I just hoped that Ken-kun was feeling better, though I doubt it. Those black lines under Ken-kun's eyes weren't eyeliner.
[Aya]
"What are our assignments, Omi?"
I tap Omi's shoulder through the space in the car seat.Omi is in front, Ken and I at the back with Youji driving. The usual seating arrangement, and it should be a usual mission except for the uncharacteristic tension inside the car emanating from Ken, Youji and me.
Right now, I shove the emotions I feel aside, concentrating on finishing the mission. I cannot afford to think of personal concerns at the moment.
Omi turns to face everyone, typing in his laptop all the while.
"There are three critical points we have to infiltrate." He turns the laptop towards us, revealing a digital map of the building, with 3 red dots on specific locations.
"We all start out here." Omi pointed to the rofftop. One of us will remain behind to disable the security system. The others will come down the ventilation system. Once we reach the 14th floor, someone will have to stay behind in that floor's ventilation system and work on a separate alarm system. Security on that floor has been doubled, due to Project: Trojan. The remaining two members will have a clear path to the laboratories. Those two will have to get Cassandra and kill off the scientists."
"Hn." I turn an inquiring eye at Omi."And you have worked out who will go on the assignments?"
I know Omi has done that already, this was standard procedure after all. But dread fills me because somehow I know just who are going to get assigned to do what.
Omi was going to assign Ken to the first position. It was the safest place imaginable and we were all worried about a repeat from last mission. Omi would want Ken to be in the safest place possible.
Omi would have to be the one in the ventilation system because he would have to take care of the more complicated security alarms around Cassandra's floor. No one else would be able to handle that.
That would leave Youji and…me to take care of the scientists and Cassandra. And that was what I was afraid of. Right now, I'd no sooner do this thing alone than be with Youji.
But still, a mission is a mission.
[Omi]
"Siberian will take the first point."
"Demo…" Ken-kun protested.
I knew he would. He had this mother-hen thinking that sometimes slips through even on missions.I know what is running through his head. He's thinking that I needed to be protected since I'm the youngest. As if I couldn't kick ass with the rest of them. He hadn't been like this before, only since we all got back to work.
It was and still is irritating…not that I don't appreciate the concern but just because I had the looks of a defenseless boy didn't mean I *was* defenseless. And besides, in this case, Ken-kun's the one who needed to be protected.
I cut him off even before he could argue.
"I am going to be at the second point where the alarms are more complicated. We need someone who has some knowledge of my computer programs on the first point to guarantee success. We cannot just leave anybody who might blow up the laptop."
I look pointedly at the driving Youji-kun to emphasize my point. He obviously felt my scrutiny because he threw me an exasperated glance.
"It was only one time, Bombay. Go rub it in, why don't you?"
"That does not give you the excuse to total a perfectly good piece of hardware."
I arch an eyebrow. I am still seething at what I had witnessed earlier and am not feeling inclined to be kind at all.
And anyway, Youji-kun had totaled my laptop that time. I didn't want to sacrifice a new one again.
"So that leaves you Siberian." I glossed over the fact that Aya-kun could actually operate the programs efficiently too but why bother over the unnecessary details. My objective is to stick Ken-kun in the safest place possible.
And it seems that both Aya-kun and Youji-kun agree with me because both nod their heads. 3 against 1. There wasn't anything Ken-kun could do but acquiesce.
"That would leave Abyssinian and Balinese to secure Cassandra and take care of the scientists."
I could almost feel Aya-kun's brows wrinkle in disapproval at my back. But I ignore it, like everyone else, he had to deal with his issues, the misison came first.
"Estimated time for a safe escape would be 2 hours tops. Go in, disable alarms, get Cassandra, kill scientists, get out, as fast as we can. Any longer and the cavalry will begin arriving. Any questions?"
I look around at the others, noting the tension inside the car. It was almost tangible. I swing my head as Ken-kun cleared his voice.
"Just one." He told me, something flickering in his eyes. I could tell he felt the tension too. He held up a woolen ski mask."Do I still need to wear this damn thing?" There is a plaintive note in his voice.
I stare in shock for a moment at the incredulity of the statement and then burst out in laughter. The same-time Aya-kun and Youji-kun did. Tears gathering in my eyes.
Like magic, the tension vanished, leaving behind a comfortable silence. And I realize that Ken-kun did it for that reason. I smile to myself.
/Arigato, Ken-kun./
No one else could have carried off that stupid comment save for Ken-kun. And perhaps for the hundreth time since Weiß reunited, I thank God that Ken-kun had decided to go back. Things would never have been the same if Ken-kun wasn't with us. We were family.
[Youji]
Ran's katana could probably have cut through the air and left a deep tangible gash. That is, if Ran wanted to, which he didn't, after all he has a proverbial stick-shoved-up-his-you-know-what syndrome. I'm being catty but that was how thick the tension in the car was.
I know where all of this is coming from, of course. Shit, I'm not fucking insensitive or blind. Besides, even if I was, I would still feel the dagger glares Ran kept leveling at me. Though to be fair, it wasn't just me he was glaring at. Hell, he had been glaring at practically everything for the past hour. If anyone devised a hell on earth, it would have an Aya Fujimiya guard glaring at everyone from the back seat of the car. Things couldn't get any worse than this.
"That would leave Abyssinian and Balinese to secure Cassandra and take care of the scientists."
Did I say things couldn't get any worse than the previous time? I was wrong. Nothing could be worse than *this*. Having a very furious Ran as my partner.
Now, normally, I wouldn't give a fuck about Ran being mad but this was different. A partner is supposed to be the one watching my back and vice-versa. Somehow it doesn't give me much confidence to know that my partner is *the* one who wants to stab me in the back even before the enemy does. This is definitely not a good strategic plan. Not that I have any choice in the matter of course.
I would go through this shitty mission and worry about Ran later.
"Estimated time for a safe escape would be 2 hours tops. Go in, disable alarms, get Cassandra, kill scientists, get out, as fast as we can. Any longer and the cavalry will begin arriving. Any questions?"
/I have one. How about switching partners?/
I am about to voice out a joke to clear the tension when Ken spoke up.
"Just one." He told us, something flickering in his eyes. I could tell he felt the tension too. He held up a woolen ski mask."Do I still need to wear this damn thing?"
I burst out laughing. The remark was just so damn silly, so funny and artless, so…so Ken. So endearingly Ken.
I sneak a peek at the rear-view mirror to look at the unaware brunette reflected therein, caressing the sweet curves of Ken's face with my green gaze. Ken wasn't beautiful, not really. Hard as it is to say, Aya was the beauty of the group, not Ken. But Ken was, well, he was, endearing. And I never tire of looking.
But even as I admire him, I note the tiredness in his face, the pinched look in his expression as well as the pale pallor. But most of all I notice the sureptitiously worried glances he kept throwing Ran's way. My heart constricts.
That's it. Note to myself, I am going to talk to Ran before we go in. I'll tell him that it wasn't what it seemed back in the alley.
I am pleased at that thought. That's a fuckingly good idea. It would probably save lives too, namely mine, since then he'd know that *nothing* happened. And we could concentrate on the mission.
/Stop kidding yourself, Kudou. You know why you're really going to tell him./
Fucking conscience couldn't leave it well enough alone. And yes, of course I know why I'm doing it. Still that line was far cooler to hear than the truth.
/And what is the truth?/
That I'm doing this because of *him*. My gaze returns to Ken's reflection. That goes without saying.
/You do realize that you'll be helping Ran yet *again*./
Yes.
/All hail the great martyr convert, Youji Kudou! My, how far you've fallen,/
Shut up!
/That's impossible Kudou as you well now. You can't shut a conscience up./
Then you're retired. Goddamn it! Who needs a fucking conscience?
Even before my conscience can reply, I realize that we're here. I step on the brakes angrily, abruptly halting the car.
"We're here." I tell them in clipped tones, I am angry at my reticence in forgetting the mission.
Everyone gets out of the car, as silent and sure-footed as the cats we're named after. Each in his own thoughts, readying himself with a habitual ritual unique to each one.
I check my weapons and make sure that my communicator is in good working order as I try to prepare myself mentally. But try as I want to be calm, I can't. Because the business with Ran is still unresolved. I have a feeling I'll never be prepared until I get it over with.
/Hell, I should get it over with. No sense waiting in a welter of agony over nothing./
I step forward and put a hand on Ran's arm.
"Abyssinian, got a minute? I want to talk to you. In private."
[Ran]
I lead Youji a little away from the other two without a word spoken. And when I judge that we are conveniently far enough for them not to hear, I stop and turn towards Youji, pinning him with a glare.
"What is it you want, Kudou?"
My voice sounds clipped, rude even. And I do not care, I would have wanted to emphasize that with a punch or two if I could but I restrained myself.
"It wasn't what you think it was."
Fucking shit! I want to tell him. The hell it wasn't. What would he call what I saw? I saw him with Ken in his arms, damn it! *And* with his head bent in an angle that meant he *kissed* Ken. Now he was telling me it wasn't what I think it was? Bullshit!
If I was any less restrained I would have given voice to those hateful words. As he would have. Or Ken would have. But I am not Youji or Ken, I am Ran and the only time I ever give voice to my anger is when I can't control it anymore. And right now, I am still in control.
I shrug my shoulders and look at him nonchalantly.
"What makes you think I care?"
Youji snorted. A derisive snort that meant he didn't believe me one bit.
"I am not naïve Ken, Ran. You can't fool me with that bullshit."
I glare at him.
"Nor am I Omi whom you can intimidate with your death glares."
That tears it. I couldn't help it. My mask slipped.
"Yes, you're just Youji who makes out with anyone human!"
/That was low, Ran, very low./
Yes, it was low but I couldn't help it. Standing before me was the one who stole my Ken away from me and taunting me. Even the most perfect of men would do what I did.
He arched his brows at me, not even daunted.
"Surely you can think of a better insult, Ran."
"Look, Kudou. We have a mission to do. Can we spare the chitchat until later?"
"No. We talk now. Because later, you will talk to Ken."
I raise an eyebrow in surprise.How did he know?
"I know you well enough to know that you tried to brush Ken off an hour ago. That is why we are talking now, Chief Shinigami. Because you *will* talk to Ken later."
The emphasis on the word "will" didn't escape me. There was an implicit threat in the words, an unsaid "or else" hanging in the air. Not that I would do anything just because Youji threatened me.
"Hn." I tell him non-committally.
"It wasn't what you think it was."
He just repeated what he said a while ago. And I am repeating myself too. I still don't believe.
"Nothing happened."
Oh, sure Kudou. Nothing happened. That's why you had your arms around him.
"Ken and I are just friends."
Bullshit. Friends do not kiss each other.
"Or at least, we're just friends, from Ken's point of view."
The softly uttered words grab my attention like nothing Youji has said. It was more to himself that he said it rather than to me. The words conveyed hurt and wistful yearning, words I wouldn't have used to describe Youji before.
But it fit now, there was no other way to describe the tone he used. And somehow, this made me believe him. He couldn't have acted out the pain in his voice.
And hope fills my being as much as I try to surpress it. After all, gloating over someone's pain is always in bad taste. But still…
Thoughts tumble into each other, clamoring to be heard. But one thought overrode all others. Did Ken still love me?
I wanted to ask Youji. But before I can even form the words, I hear a rustling in the bushes. Battle-ready reflexes takes over and I unsheathe my katana at the same time that Youji takes out his wire.
The bushes parted to reveal a blushing Omi.
"Gomen nasai. But its time."
I nod my head and follow him back to the car. Its time for the mission to begin. My question could be answered later…when I speak to Ken.
TBC
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