Run, any place, anywhere,
just far from the Doctor's place. Maybe if I run fast enough, hard enough,
long enough, this will all turn out to be a nightmare and when I wake up
I'll find everything will be alright.
I stop, finally, wheezing
and coughing. It seems that the cigarettes have finally worn down my resistance,
I haven't even run more than a half-mile and here I am…winded. I laugh
in self-derision. If Ken was here, I'd be choking on his "I-told-you-so's".
Aa, Ken. Why?! Why did Ken
have to be Astyanax? There must be at least a hundred fucking people in
the world who have drug-induced anemia but no, Ken had to be the one the
doctor found.
Ken would never turn down
the request to help. Its like asking the sun not to go up in the morning.
It would be easier to stop the earth from turning on its axis than it is
to stop Ken from helping out, especially when it involved children, never
mind that it endangered his life.
"DamnDamnDamn!"
The hapless tree in front
of me receive the brunt of my frustration. And I go on and on for a good
long while…until the throbbing pain of bleeding knuckles forces me to stop.
I slide to the ground, my agonized eyes staring at the cloudy indigo night
sky accusingly.
Now more than ever my faith
in a benevolent God is tested. If there really is a good God, He would
not pick on Ken like this because out of all the people I have ever met,
Ken's the kindest.
"Make him wake up. That's
all I ask,make him wake up."
Maybe the Benevolent One
is actually listening because at this exact moment my communicator meeps
at me.
"Balinese here."
"Youji-kun! I just want to
tell you that Ken-kun seems to be in good order and is going to regain
consciousness anytime soon."
"I'll be right there, Omi."
/Ken will be alright.
He will be./
[Omi]
Ken-kun's eyelids flutter
and open to reveal the rich brown eyes underneath. The first one he sees
is Youji-kun, mainly because Youji-kun comandeered the seat next to his
bed soon after he arrived. I opted instead for the chair on Ken-kun's other
side.
"Youji, Omi. Is Ran alright?"
"He's alright, still unconscious
but none the worse for wear.Unlike you…lie back down, Ken." I hear the
relief in Youji-kun's voice even as he puts out a hand to steady Ken-kun
who is trying to rise. His wounded hand which had dried blood on it.
"Youji, your hand? What did
you do to it? That wasn't there when we got here. Don't tell me you've
been infected by my clumsiness?" Ken-kun grins.
That's what I'd like to know
too. I had asked Youji-kun about it but he didn't answer. Just as he doesn't
answer now, only shrugging the question off with a wave of his hand.
"I am not the one who needs
to answer questions!" He tells Ken-kun and without missing a beat, jade
green eyes heat with anger.
"I can't believe you did
this, Ken. This is suicidal."
Youji-kun bursts out. The
small smile on Ken-kun's lips vanish as he looks from Youji-kun to me.
I am sure he notices the grim set of our eyes. He sighs.
"So, I guess you guys know
everything, hmmnnn?"
"That's the understatement
of the year." I grumble, more to myself than to Ken-kun. There is an undercurrent
of desperation in my voice and I am grasping Ken-kun's hand as if it is
a lifeline.
I know more, now, because
after Youji-kun left, I gathered what remained of my composure to seek
out the doctor to ask him about the virus.
//
I dragged heavy feet down
the hall, searching for the doctor. I needed to find out more about the
virus, the hope that he has already found a cure for Ken-kun's sickness
shining brightly inside of me. I held on to that hope, tightly, because
it was all that kept me sane at that moment.
I found him just finishing
up on his tests with Ken-kun.
"Doctor."
"Omi." As the doctor swung
his head to look at me, I noticed that his eyes had a look of resolve in
them.
Good, he knew just what
I wanted from him. That simplified things.
"A word with you?"
The doctor nodded and
made his way out of the room, gesturing at me to follow behind him. As
soon as theI closed the door, I turned to him, the question still in my
eyes.
Why.
"I needed to find zumone
fast. Zeiger vas already moving even before I escaped. It vas chance luck
zat got me into Brazil and even more luck to find Ken. I am zorry but Ken
vas the perfect carrier. I could not paz it up."
Acceptable premise, even
for me. One that I had come up with on my own, actually, but I needed to
hear it from the doctor. There is no logical explanation why I needed to,
I just did.
"So the next question
would be: is there a cure for his condition?"
I clutched tighter at
the shining hope inside my heart, my invisible anchor to sanity.
The doctor's eyes drooped
at the corner and his eyes focused on mine in concern. "Vat do *you* think?
If all zat Ken-kun has told me is true, you are bright enuf to come to
the conclusion yourself, young Omi. Vat is your conclusion?"
Clutch at hope, breathe,
don't let go, eventhough the dread is growing.
I took a deep breath and
told him what I thought. "From the reports I have read, I think there isn't
a cure yet and if I am right, you are relying on Ken-kun's immune system
holding out after his body churns out the anti-bodies for Trojan. From
there, you hope the anti-bodies would also cure him of his condition."
"Zat is correct." His
voice is laced with admiration for me but it doesn't impress me in the
least because I know something else that does not exactly fill me with
confidence.
"You calculated a 90%
chance of survival did you not doctor?"
"Yes, I did."
"But you did not factor
in the drug-induced anemia making Ken-kun weaker through the passage of
time. Factoring that into the equation, what is Ken-kun's chance of survival?"
He is surprised at the
revelation that I just threw his way. And I repress the urge to arch an
eyebrow. Just because I looked like a young boy didn't mean I couldn't
read between the lines. I am, after all, the strategist for Weiß.
The doctor just had to learn who Omi Tsukiyono was.
"Ah, yes. Factoring zat
in vud severely lessen the chances of survival."
I knew that. What I didn't
know was the exact percentage. Hell, I may be very intelligent but that
didn't mean I knew squat about medicine and how one factored in sicknesses.
Who would know if anemia was factored in as an exponential increase or
just added as a constant.
"How low?" I asked the
doctor.
He seemed to hesitate
before replying. "35%"
That made me rear back
my head in surprise. Damn! Even I did not expect that.
My anchor vanishes from
sight at the doctor's words. The future looks bleaker than it has ever
did before.
"No." I whisper.
"I am zorry Omi. I vas
hoping I could spare you the details. Ken haz asked me never to tell you
ov zis as it is."
"Does he know?" I asked
dully.
"Zat he has a big chance
ov dying?"
I nod.
"Yes. Yes he does. I varned
him from the start. Vut he insisted on continuing despite zat."
Aa, of course he would
because he knew that there is a 90% chance of his body developing anti-bodies
for Trojan even if it would mean his death. It would be Astyanax all over
again.
"This anemia…the faints…you
have factored them all in doctor?"
"Inside out, at every
possible angle. Ze percentage I quoted iz actually ze highest."
Shit.
//
I am brought back to the
present as Youji-kun bursts out. "Goddamn it! You're too impulsive for
your own good. Why did you have to volunteer yourself?"
There is heavy censure in
Youji-kun's voice, one I am inclined to agree with. As usual, Ken bristles
at the mother-hen tone he senses in Youji's voice.
"Look, you aren't exactly
my keeper, Youji! What was I suppose to do? Wait until someone else turns
up? I read the news too, Youji and they were already reporting isolated
cases of Trojan! I couldn't just sit there and wait."
Point. Ken-kun had a point
of course but that doesn't stop me from siding with Youji-kun.
"You could have waited a
few weeks at the most Ken-kun."
Ken-kun's head turns sharply
to where I am sitting with this damning look in his eyes. "Children, Omi,
they were infecting children."
Aa, children. They had always
been Ken-kun's waterloo, the one thing he couldn't resist…aside from Ran-kun.
But still…
/It is not that I don't
understand the situation, Ken-kun, but still…/
Perhaps I am selfish, that
*we* are selfish, Youji-kun and I, but the thought of losing Ken-kun is
just too much.
"Demo…"
"Urusai! I don't want to
hear anything more about this! Its done, alright? Can we do something productive
instead? Besides," he smiles, "its not like I'm going to die ne?"
LIE! My eyes dilate at the
blatant untruth that just came from Ken-kun's mouth. Ok so its not really
a lie, after all he still had a 15% chance of living. Yeah, right!
I am just about to dispute
that fact when Youji-kun speaks.
"That's good, that's very
good."
The comfort in Youji-kun's
voice is palpable.
Damn! Armed with the knowledge
that he loves Ken-kun, how can I even say the truth now…to do so would
be like incapacitating Youji-kun and the fight against Trojan was far from
over. With Ran-kun down and Ken-kun barely in top condition, we couldn't
afford three people out of commission.
Hard as it was to be deceitful,
the greater need must prevail. /Gomen nasai, Youji-kun./
Maybe I can console myself
with the fact that Youji-kun is probably happier now that he thinks Ken-kun
isn't going to die.
… … …
Small consolation.
I want to throw something
at someone, kill the one responsible for all of this….do something violent,
before I lose my mind.
The door opens.
"Youji, Omi…ve haf an emergency."
Perfect.
TBC ^_~
Let's fill in the blanks!
Co_ _en_ts onegai? Ahohohoho!
Wai wai! glomps you all>
Greatest thanks to the people who still commented even after 72 pages of
Swyth-chan's torturous first fic ^^ Because Gott is my first WK fic. ^o^v
