Note from the author: Ah, at last, the tenth and final chapter to my Zoid fanfic. I hope people can read the ending, because I'm actually very proud of it! Ten points if you can guess which anime I'm alluding to at the beginning of this chapter with Shiro's wistful rambling (hint: has something to do with deep space planet gun action!! … and it features my absolute favorite manga/anime bishounen); and another ten points if you guess the one I'm alluding end of this chapter (hint: it's got something to do with cigarettes, yaoi, and the ever handsome Katze).
Disclaimer: You know how this goes. To hell with such reminders. I've got them down on the previous 9 chapters already!
Eden: Found
"Stigma?"
Stoller lifted his head and found himself seated in an uncomfortably hard chair beside Shiro's bed, hunched over so his elbows were resting over the edge. He was still in uniform with his overcoat tossed over his shoulders in a careless manner. Shiro was lying under the bed sheet, staring up at the bleak ceiling of her room.
"Shiro, you're awake…"
"At long last. I wake up from my dream to enter this living nightmare."
Stigma pulled his seat closer to her bed, straightening slightly as he reached under the sheets to grasp her hand, squeezing it lightly, "Shiro, what happened to you out there? Please, tell me so that I may be able to help you."
"Stigma."
"Yes?"
"Take off your gloves."
A blink, but he complied by slowly removing the gloves over his hands, tugging at the tip of every finger before pulling each one off and stuffing them into the inside pocket of his coat. Shiro's hands came forward to grasp his right and she drew it close, nuzzling the rough surface skin against her cheek as she curled tightly along the edge of the bed. Stigma leaned down again, stopping when his dry lips came to rest over her forehead. He barely had to pull away in order to speak, and his voice came in a soft yet hoarse whisper, "Shiro… Shiro, I love you."
The response he got was an incoherent groan as the woman tightened her hands over his, caressing it within her grasp. It was rough, his skin, despite the fact that he always wore gloves. Maybe he'd taken up the habit too late in his lifetime, and by the time he realized his work, along with age, was taking its toll on his hands, it was too late to save them. Now he wore gloves to conceal their ugliness, but Shiro held his right hand as if it were the most wonderful thing. She was younger than him by thirty or so years, give or take a couple, and yet here she was plagued by demons the Backdraft had placed in her head. He could feel tears welling up in his eyes, and he pushed away his thoughts in order to prevent them from flowing down his face.
"Stigma."
"I enjoy listening to the way my name sounds when you say it…"
"Then remind me to say it more often, Captain."
"Shiro…"
Shiro smiled then, and her smile brought a sense of reassurance to the captain, "You're a tease." The lieutenant nodded in return, "I know." She lifted one hand from his as she rolled onto her back, "I want everything to be perfect again, Stigma. I want to be with you, to be in a place where there is only you, and perhaps Izumi and her new friends…"
"Izumi and the Blitz Team?"
"They dubbed me a genius when I was too young to know anything, and Izumi was just the brawn. They were so wrong, Stigma… She escaped and she's freed herself since then… I'm still here. I'm going to be spending the rest of my days in this miserable place!"
As Shiro lurched into a sitting position, Stigma lunged forward to catch her in his arms, squeezing her, as if the fear of losing her had reappeared all of a sudden, "I'll always be here, even in a place such as this. Hate it if you must, but Shiro, can you hate me? I am a part of all of this, and I was part of it before you were even born… Do you hate me, Shiro?"
"I could never, but I want to go back to that place. I want to feel that happiness ignorance provided. Stigma, let's go there together. Let's go to our Eden… together."
Does Eden truly exist?
Yes, but you must find it.
The day was just like that day ten years ago, with the same blue sky and the same sea of grass, green and ripe with wildflowers. Dreigon was her companion now, and it stood a good ten feet away, looking past the endless field, and out at the desert which lay beyond, at the range of canyons, which hid the Toros base from view. Then, it lowered its head to peer at the flowers with a keen interest. A few minutes later, both the Zoid and its pilot had been jolted by their idleness by a foreign object in the distance. They stared for a moment before recognizing it to be the Shadow Fox. Izumi fell back once more and the Dreigon returned to its examination of the flowers, its cold muzzle disappearing beneath the tall grass, only the tip of its longer horn appearing above the grass. The Shadow Fox came up rather unexpectedly, stopping beside the larger of the two black Zoids, taking a moment to let Brad off. It stood motionless beside the Dreigon as Brad stumbled through the meadow toward Izumi, dropping into a seated position beside her.
"Naomi
didn't sound very upset when I broke the news to her."
"That woman has
temperance."
"Most
of the time, yeah. But enough about
her."
Izumi turned with a blink,
in time to receive a kiss to her mouth, his lips pressing rather firmly over
hers. Her arms gave out and she was in
the grass once more, with Brad partially over her, though he'd stopped himself
with a hand on either side of Izumi's head, "You're pretty clumsy for a
cold-hearted mercenary pilot."
"Go to hell, Brad."
If I were to die and be reborn,
I'd like to be reborn in a place such as this.
The hanger
was empty say for the lone, white Genosaurer as it stood in its corner, silent
in contemplation. The hanger itself was
dark, as the lights had been shut off to conserve energy, and the door leading
out into the snow-covered landscape was closed. Inside the cockpit of the Genosaurer were two Backdraft members –
a lieutenant and her captain. Stigma
was reclined against the leather seat inside the cramped cockpit, and Shiro was
seated over his lap, her back against his chest, and her head over his
shoulder. Her body was twisted in a
seemingly uncomfortable position, but she couldn't care less now. She watched in silence as Stigma reached
into the inside pocket of his coat as it was spread over the floor beside the
pilot's chair with his now bare hands and produced a gold band upon which a
modest little diamond was mounted, "Sorry, I couldn't afford the box when I
first got this, and I didn't want to go back to that jewelry store."
"You don't need to explain
yourself, captain."
They smiled at one another before both directed their attentions to the ring as Stigma carefully lifted Shiro's right hand, ignoring the fingerless glove as he slid the ring onto her ring finger with his other hand. Then he held her right hand up to the dim light provided by the Zoid's monitors, and both man and woman sat in a short moment of silence while they admired the ring and everything it symbolized.
Shiro looked toward Stigma again as he continued to dig through his pockets until he'd found a pack of cigarettes, which he flicked open with his thumb to reveal the only cigarette inside. It was no ordinary cigarette, and they both knew it.
"A black moon?"
Stigma nodded, "Yes. It's painless…"
"I've never smoked before."
"And I haven't smoked in fifteen years."
With the arm he had around Shiro's waist, Stigma brought out a lighter, and he used it to light the cigarette he put to his lips before tossing the lighter to the floor of the cockpit and taking a deep breath. He moved the cigarette aside between two fingers so that he could release a stream of foul-smelling smoke through pursed lips. He then raised the cigarette toward Shiro, offering it to her. She took his hand with both of her own as Stigma guided the black moon cigarette toward her, waiting for her to catch it between her lips. Even then, he didn't let go, and watched as she inhaled, taking the cigarette away at the right moment so she could exhale. Shiro choked.
"It's horrible, I know."
She coughed for a little bit longer, "Now what?"
"Now we wait, beloved."
Their breathing was steady and in sync as they lay against one another, both overcome with a sense of bliss, knowing they would be free of all tribulations their lives had brought upon them. They could finally be together, forever. Eventually, Shiro's head grew heavy against Stoller's shoulder, and she glanced up at him through sleepy eyes. A reassuring hand over the back of her head eased her down against him again, and her face became partially buried against his chest, the fingers of her right hand curling over his collar bone. Stigma undid the first two buttons of his shirt before picking his coat off of the floor and draping it over himself and his woman. He closed his eyes with a contented smile.
"I love you, my beautiful bride-to-be."
His hand fell from the seat, swaying as it dangled a few inches from the floor. The cigarette tumbled from between his chapped lips just as it was about to burn out, and came to rest over his coat, flecks of ash falling over the immaculate face of his lieutenant. They could be together at long last, and they would never be apart again.
If I were to be reborn,
I'd like to be reborn in Eden.
Izumi jolted into a sitting position, her sudden movements rousing Brad as well. She stood as abruptly as she had awakened and spun in a full circle, panicking.
"Izumi! What's wrong?" Brad rose and stood beside her, reaching out to grab her shoulders. Her muscles had grown taut all of a sudden, "Izumi!"
Izumi blinked and gazed up at her Zoid - they both understood now. "It was nothing, Brad. I had a bad dream, that's all."
She lowered her head to smile at him, assuring that all was right with the world. Brad's facial expression eased as well as he saw her smile. It was a comforting sight. He drew her into her arms and offered a loving embrace. Izumi returned it by slipping her arms around his neck, her face pressed against his shoulder.
"I love you, Brad Hunter."
"And I love you, Hagime Izumi."
Does Eden even exist?
Yes, but you must find it.