~Tears of a Phoenix~
A Fushigi Yuugi/Harry Potter Crossover
DISCLAIMER: Rowling-sama owns Harry Potter and Watase-sama owns Fushigi Yuugi. Chibigreen only owns a homemade Chichiri plushie. *glomps plushie*
Note: Did you notice that Chibigreenwizardmon is now Chibigreen Tanuki?
~Chapter 5~
*Ryuuen's POV*
I could tell that tears were pouring down my face. How could they just say who I was like that? I've been Kourin for years; ever since Mother left us and took Kourin away. So that I wouldn't forget her, I became Kourin, as well as my family's shame. None of them, except for Houki, supported me, and she only did it because she is my twin and understands me better than anyone else.
Why did they have to find out that I was a boy? The looks on their faces when they had realized that I wasn't whom I had acted like… Those looks had made me feel ashamed of myself. Saihitei's look had hurt the most, showing surprise mixed with a touch of disgust. They must all hate me because of my strangeness.
I collapsed on a stair as it disappeared underneath me, and I tumbled the rest of the way. As I rolled to a stop, I just sat hugging my knees as a wave of sadness swamped me. "Why did all of this have to happen?" I sobbed into the empty halls. "Why can't they just accept me as I am?" I buried my face in the school uniform and continued to cry. I don't know how much time passed before I felt a hand on my shoulder. I looked up and saw the last person that I had expected to see.
Saihitei was standing next to me with a concerned look on his face. "Are you all right?" he asked quietly. I buried my faced in my robes again and turned it slightly away. But he didn't go away.
"Why are you still here?" My robes muffled my voice. "Aren't you disgusted by me like everyone else is?"
The answer surprised me. "No. Should I be?"
"I'm a nutcase, a eleven-year-old transvestite. A weirdo. Not even Houki likes what she calls my 'acting.'"
"Is it an act?"
"Maybe. I don't know anymore. It was, at first, so that I wouldn't miss my sister, but now… I don't know." Why was I even telling him all this? It must've been because of the kind way he treated me, like I wasn't strange or that it was okay that I was different.
Saihitei nodded understandingly. "You're not a weirdo or a nutcase, Ryuuen." The name sounded strange coming from him. But I guess that that it is time to use my real name again. "You are just a regular eleven-year-old. Everyone is different than everyone else. Genrou has an anger problem, Miaka is obsessed with eating, Houjun has a speech affectation, and Juan prefers to talk with animals over talking with people. If you want to dress like a girl, and you're being yourself while you're doing it, then I don't have a problem with it."
I looked at him in astonishment. He was accepting me as I was, and he didn't think I was strange at all? "Thank you…"
He smiled kindly. There was a light in his eyes like he was relieved that I was feeling happy again. "It's not a problem. It's what any friend would do." He put out his hand. "So, are we friends?"
I clasped his hand, and he helped me off of the floor. "Friends," I agreed with my own smile. Together, we walked back to the Gryffindor dormitories. For the first time in my life, I truly didn't care what anyone else thought about me. I had Saihitei's approval, and that was enough for me.
*******
I'm really not a morning person. My favorite thing is to have a relaxing sleep in a nice, soft bed. But when everyone else began to get up, Princess made sure I went to class on time by sitting on my chest and tickling my nose with her tail. I groaned and rolled over, covering my head with my pillow so my white kitty couldn't get her paws on my head.
Unfortunately, I had forgotten the braid I always wore my hair in when I slept. She began to bat my hair back and forth, occasionally pouncing on it while it was on my back to let me know that she was displeased with my lazy behavior. Finally I groaned and got up, and she took my pillow immediately so that she could take a nap. I think that my cat let her name go to her head.
Everyone else was already at breakfast by the time I got up, so for once I left my hair in the braid. Then I quickly changed into my school uniform and left for the Great Hall.
As the first people saw me, they began whispering and pointing. The tale of my cross-dressing must have spread through the school quickly. Pretending that I didn't see their stares, I silently slid into a seat next to Saihitei at the Gryffindor table. Others down the table began to turn their heads to look at me. "I heard that she's actually a he," I heard someone mutter. I turned to face that person with a polite smile on my face.
"What? Haven't you ever seen a transvestite before?" I asked mischievously.
The person turned red and shut up. Others at the table began to giggle, and slowly they stopped whispering and looking at me.
"What's a transvestite?" Miaka asked in between gulping down a huge omelet.
I was surprised that she even paused in her eating long enough to ask me. "A transvestite is a person who dresses as the opposite gender. It's hard to cross-dress in wizard robes because the girl robes and the guy robes are almost identical."
Taka had to pat Miaka on the back as she choked. When she'd recovered, she turned to stare at me with huge eyes. "You're a guy? Is that why you weren't in the girl's dormitories?"
"Ummm," I mumbled as I served myself a waffle. "Yes."
"Why did you cross-dress in the first place?"
I began to eat my waffle instead of answering. How can Miaka be so tactless?
Apparently, she hadn't even started. "Kourin? Are you going to tell us?"
"My name's Ryuuen," I said.
"But why did you cross-dress?"
Tentatively, Doukun said, "Miaka-san, perhaps Kou… um, Ryuuen-san… does not feel like telling us?"
"Oh. Why not?"
She wasn't getting the point. "It's a personal reason," I finally told her. Grinning, I added, "And aren't dresses just so nice to wear?"
Saihitei was the only one to laugh at that. The others were just turning various colors and blinking. "Bloody weird okama," Genrou, who was sitting to my right, muttered.
"Genrou," I growled, "do not call me a 'bloody weird okama.' I'm just a transvestite, not homosexual." He did not need to be so rude about my cross-dressing.
"Yeah, right," he said sarcastically. My fist somehow managed to bang him on the back of his head, and he shot me a glare.
"I'm gonna–"
"If you do anything, Genrou, I may accidentally let it slip to Mom how rude you were," Kouji said impishly from Genrou's other side. The fang-boy froze.
The rest of breakfast was not a very comfortable meal. No one knew how to act around me, I guess. Only Saihitei acted as he normally would towards me, but at least there was that.
*******
As the first week went by, slowly my friends and I grew more comfortable with each other again. Saihitei was so nice about it all, and so was Houki. I heard that she had badmouthed someone in her house after they had made fun of me. Even my older brother Rokou, who was know for being a coward, was sticking up for me in Hufflepuff. Slytherin was the only house that unified in looking down on me, but most Slytherins look down on everyone else.
The first class that we had was Herbology, which was taught outside in a large greenhouse. A pudgy little witch who went by the name of Professor Sprout taught it. She was the head of the Hufflepuff House, and, like most Hufflepuffs, she seemed very kind and friendly. She explained to us that we would be studying magical fungi and herbs from around the world.
That afternoon was History of Magic, and that had to be the most boring class in the world. I'm sure that some history classes can be almost interesting, but the guy who taught it, Professor Binns, just droned on and on about goblin wars and rebellions. It made everyone want to fall asleep, so some of the others did. I heard some fifth year students saying that Professor Binns is so old that he probably won't stop teaching until he dies. Somehow, though, I don't doubt that he'll come back to haunt everyone by continuing to talk about the most boring history in the world.
After a good night's sleep, we started the next day's classes off with Transfiguration, taught by Professor Minerva McGonagall. I was sitting in the front row, and she started off the class by giving us a stern lecture on how we were to behave in her class and what we would learn in it. Then she transformed four of my books into exotic parrots before turning them back into books again.
Of course, she then told us, "You will eventually be able to do that, but that will not come until at least fifth or sixth year. Now we will take notes on basic Transfiguration. Take out your quills and parchment." At least her lecture wasn't as boring as the one we got in History of Magic, and afterwards she gave us matches to transfigure into needles. Mine became a grayish-silver, but Doukun did the best of all. His was beginning to look more like a silver toothpick than a match. When she saw that, Professor McGonagall actually smiled and congratulated him. I hadn't thought that she could smile, with the face she had on usually.
McGonagall was the Head of Gryffindor House, but that didn't stop her from piling a load of homework on us.
The other classes seemed to shoot by as well. There was Defense Against the Dark Arts, a class that was taught by Professor Quirrell. He had only been hired last year, so he wasn't as old as most of the teachers. His class was neither interesting nor boring; he taught mostly by the book, but the subject material was remarkable enough that it didn't matter. I think that I'll do some research on Defense Against the Dark Arts in my free time, just for fun. By the sounds of it, it's a necessity in the wizarding world.
At Midnight on Wednesdays, we had Astronomy with Professor Sinistra. In that class, we learned about the movements of the stars and planets, as well as all of their names.
Then there was Charms with Professor Flitwick, an extremely small person who had to stand on something to even peek over his desk. However, Charms is a very fun class, and Professor Flitwick is an interesting person.
The last class I had was Potions. It was on Thursday, and our schedule said that it was Double Potions with the Slytherin on Friday. During dinner that night, Kouji warned us about the teacher.
"D'ya see that teacher over there?" he asked as he pointed to a professor with greasy-looking hair and a scowl on his face. "That's Professor Snape, and he's about as mean as they come. I heard that he had some bad business with the Dark Arts in that war with You-Know-Who."
You-Know-Who was otherwise known as the Dark Lord Voldemort. Most of the wizarding world was still afraid to utter his name, but I've heard that he was afraid of Professor Dumbledore. I wonder what that crazy old wizard who runs the school actually knows if he was able to keep Voldemort away from his school?
"I don't know why Dumbledore keeps him around," Kouji continued. "I mean, Dumbledore's the most powerful Light wizard in the world; I heard that he was in Gryffindor a long time ago. But Snape is a slimy git, as the British people here would say, and he favors Slytherin because he's the head of their house. He's always giving them points, but if a Gryffindor so much as raises their hand the wrong way… Bang! He takes some of our points away. He made it really difficult for Gryffindor last year." His tone of voice was innocent, but by the gleam in his eyes I figured that some of the 'difficulty' was partly his fault.
I decided to just try my best. So far, school was fine, I had a lot of friends, and no one had called me a homo or weird for the past three days. I was sure that the school year was looking up. Professor Snape really couldn't be that bad, right? I sipped at my pumpkin juice and decided not to worry about it.
Chibigreen's Notes: Nuriko seems to be a person that makes you want to write angst for him….
Today's recommendation: Blackbird by Purple Mouse. It's the one about Ryuuen being in a mental hospital and getting Myojuan as his psychiatrist. That one makes me feel so sad for Ryuuen, but it's a wonderful story!
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