Lizzie slammed the door behind her, and let warm tears stream down her
face. She felt trapped between worlds and personalities. Things could never
be the way they were before. She didn't know what to do with herself. Where
had she gone so terribly wrong? How had she let her own self slip away from
her?
She went into the kitchen and pulled a box of snack cakes out of the cabinet. She pulled one out and tore the wrapper open with her teeth. She nibbled on it in between sobs as she carried the box upstairs.
An hour later, she was lying in her bed with the empty box beside her. Her face was stained with dry tears as she suffered the realization of her lost state over and over again. By blowing off her friends and sitting with Jill Stokes, Lizzie had tried to forget the way things had once been. But that was more difficult to let go than she had thought. She wanted her life back, but was that possible? She had already blown her diet within one day. She couldn't even confide in her two best friends without panicking. Was she ever going to be the same old Lizzie?
There was a knock at the door. Lizzie sniffled and quickly wiped the tears from her face. "Who is it?" she asked, trying not to let the misery of her current state be apparent in her voice.
"It's me, Mom," said Mrs. McGuire. "Can I come in?"
Lizzie paused and thought. She didn't know if she was ready to talk to anyone; however, she would have to share her feelings eventually. It might as well be with her mother. "Yeah, Mom."
Mrs. McGuire slowly opened the door and peeked in. She could tell that Lizzie had been crying. She had been acting strangely ever since school had started, and Mrs. McGuire had been waiting it out to see what was bothering her. She sat down on the edge of the bed and stroked her fingers through Lizzie's blonde locks. "Is everything okay, sweetie?"
Everything was the exact opposite of okay. Lizzie didn't know where to start. Tears flood her eyes once again, and she found herself curled up and sobbing in her mother's arms. "I'm fat, Mom!" She found that it was the only thing she could really say. "I've gotten so fat, and everyone's been making fun of me."
"Sweetie, you're not fat!" Mrs. McGuire assured her. "You're beautiful, just the way you are."
Lizzie shook her head insistantly. "Don't say things like that, Mom. I know that you have to, but please don't."
Mrs. McGuire was shaken by the miserable state her daughter seemed to be in. She hugged her tightly, and then looked straight into her eyes. "Do you want to know what I think, Lizzie?" Her daughter sniffled and nodded. "I think you need to stop spending all of your time locked up in your room. You're not fat, honey, and that's the truth.You've been spending all of your time alone, feeling sad and passing the time with snack foods. I wish I knew what made you so upset, but I don't want to see you shut yourself up away from the world. It's not healthy." She wiped a tear from Lizzie's face and hugged her. "You're beautiful, Lizzie. Don't let anyone else make you feel bad about yourself."
Lizzie nodded, trying to find truth in what her mother was telling her. It was true; the reason she had put on so much weight was because she did nothing but sit around and eat. She would feel so lonely all the time, and when she got lonely, she ate. It was unhealthy. Having her mother point these things out was good, but at the same time Lizzie didn't understand how any of it would help her. She couldn't stop eating. Whenever the world around her was too chaotic, she found comfort in food. How could she give up one of the only things that comforted her?
She went into the kitchen and pulled a box of snack cakes out of the cabinet. She pulled one out and tore the wrapper open with her teeth. She nibbled on it in between sobs as she carried the box upstairs.
An hour later, she was lying in her bed with the empty box beside her. Her face was stained with dry tears as she suffered the realization of her lost state over and over again. By blowing off her friends and sitting with Jill Stokes, Lizzie had tried to forget the way things had once been. But that was more difficult to let go than she had thought. She wanted her life back, but was that possible? She had already blown her diet within one day. She couldn't even confide in her two best friends without panicking. Was she ever going to be the same old Lizzie?
There was a knock at the door. Lizzie sniffled and quickly wiped the tears from her face. "Who is it?" she asked, trying not to let the misery of her current state be apparent in her voice.
"It's me, Mom," said Mrs. McGuire. "Can I come in?"
Lizzie paused and thought. She didn't know if she was ready to talk to anyone; however, she would have to share her feelings eventually. It might as well be with her mother. "Yeah, Mom."
Mrs. McGuire slowly opened the door and peeked in. She could tell that Lizzie had been crying. She had been acting strangely ever since school had started, and Mrs. McGuire had been waiting it out to see what was bothering her. She sat down on the edge of the bed and stroked her fingers through Lizzie's blonde locks. "Is everything okay, sweetie?"
Everything was the exact opposite of okay. Lizzie didn't know where to start. Tears flood her eyes once again, and she found herself curled up and sobbing in her mother's arms. "I'm fat, Mom!" She found that it was the only thing she could really say. "I've gotten so fat, and everyone's been making fun of me."
"Sweetie, you're not fat!" Mrs. McGuire assured her. "You're beautiful, just the way you are."
Lizzie shook her head insistantly. "Don't say things like that, Mom. I know that you have to, but please don't."
Mrs. McGuire was shaken by the miserable state her daughter seemed to be in. She hugged her tightly, and then looked straight into her eyes. "Do you want to know what I think, Lizzie?" Her daughter sniffled and nodded. "I think you need to stop spending all of your time locked up in your room. You're not fat, honey, and that's the truth.You've been spending all of your time alone, feeling sad and passing the time with snack foods. I wish I knew what made you so upset, but I don't want to see you shut yourself up away from the world. It's not healthy." She wiped a tear from Lizzie's face and hugged her. "You're beautiful, Lizzie. Don't let anyone else make you feel bad about yourself."
Lizzie nodded, trying to find truth in what her mother was telling her. It was true; the reason she had put on so much weight was because she did nothing but sit around and eat. She would feel so lonely all the time, and when she got lonely, she ate. It was unhealthy. Having her mother point these things out was good, but at the same time Lizzie didn't understand how any of it would help her. She couldn't stop eating. Whenever the world around her was too chaotic, she found comfort in food. How could she give up one of the only things that comforted her?