Harry Potter Influenza by SailorSakura9
Augh! I know that "Influenza" means flu (or something along those lines) and my story has nothing to do with sickness. . . I just used influenza because I'm mimicking the Even Steven's musical (one of my favorite episodes ^_^)
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"Well that was odd," said Hermione after Dumbledore's speech.
"What was?" asked Ron as he got up to re-fill his goblet with pumpkin juice.
"You know. . .Dumbledore," said Hermione.
"Uh. . .how?" Ron raised an eyebrow.
"The announcements?"
"He always gives announcements before the feast. You know that."
"But not like. . .like. . .like THAT!"
"Like what?"
"You know! Like THAT!"
". . . I don't get it. Like what?"
"THAT!"
"What?"
"LIKE THAT!"
"Well it looks like someone's been smokin' doobies in the girls' bathroom," replied Ron sarcastically.
"What does that mean?" asked Hermione, an eyebrow raised.
"I don't know exactly. I just got it from some old Muggle," shrugged Ron.
Little did they know that the term "smokin' doobies" meant "smoking dope". I learned it from my Algebra II teacher. He's an ex-cop that's really, really old, like from the sixties or something, and so he always uses old phrases like "doobies" and "tabackie" [tobacco]. He's always accuses students that are tardy by saying that they were smoking doobies in the bathroom or "swapin' spit" with their girlfriend/boyfriend. Oh dear me! I seem to have been trailing off the story. Better get back on!
"Hermione, what's with you today?" asked Harry, "You've been kind of out of it after you bumped her head."
"I have not-" began Hermione.
"I think it's because she didn't get a chance to study," answered Ron.
"Not true!" protested Hermione.
"Ah. That makes sense," said Harry, ignoring Hermione's comment.
"Are you guys ignoring me!" huffed Hermione.
"I'm sorry, did you say something?" asked Ron and Harry simultaneously. Ron and Harry faced each other and broke out in hysterical laughter.
"Boys," muttered Hermione.
*~*~*~*~*
The next week. . .
"Ugh. . .Potions with Slytherin today," said Harry. Ron put his finger in his mouth and pretended to gag.
"Oh no," moaned Neville.
"It's ok. We can be potion partners so that you won't embarrass yourself too much," reassured Hermione.
"Maybe I should just skip the class altogether," suggested Neville.
"Neville, I don't think-" began Hermione.
"Sure, why not?" replied Harry.
"Yeah. You've done it loads of times before," said Ron.
"Since when did-" began Hermione, but again, she was cut off.
"Yeah. . .just like last time," said Neville in a dazed voice.
Just then he jumped out in the hallway and began to sing and dance. Ron and Harry began to follow the same suit. Then, other schoolmates began to do the same as well. Soon, the whole hall was full of dancing students, except Hermione, who stood dumbstruck staring at what was happening.
Neville: I'm not strong, I'm not fast. When it comes to Potions, I just can't last. So I'll get out of class as I have in the past."
Ron: Like the time you wore the used full-body cast!
Neville: I always find a way!
Ron and Harry: He always finds a way!
Ron: No one can produce an excellent excuse like you!
Neville: What can I say? I always find a way!
(at the same time) Ron and Harry: He always finds a way!
Ron: A pathetic wheeze, a powerful sneeze!
Harry: The time you filled your ears up with cottage cheese!
Neville: And said it 'cuz of my bezoar allergies - That one got me out of Potions with ease! I always find a way!
Ron and Harry (and students?): He always finds a way! He can easily create, with do abbreviate, his Potions period state! He always finds a way! He always finds a way!
Just then, Professor Snape appeared in front of the hall. Everybody stopped singing and dancing. Snape cleared his throat and began singing in an opera- like voice,
Professor Snape: But not today!
Augh! I know that "Influenza" means flu (or something along those lines) and my story has nothing to do with sickness. . . I just used influenza because I'm mimicking the Even Steven's musical (one of my favorite episodes ^_^)
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Well that was odd," said Hermione after Dumbledore's speech.
"What was?" asked Ron as he got up to re-fill his goblet with pumpkin juice.
"You know. . .Dumbledore," said Hermione.
"Uh. . .how?" Ron raised an eyebrow.
"The announcements?"
"He always gives announcements before the feast. You know that."
"But not like. . .like. . .like THAT!"
"Like what?"
"You know! Like THAT!"
". . . I don't get it. Like what?"
"THAT!"
"What?"
"LIKE THAT!"
"Well it looks like someone's been smokin' doobies in the girls' bathroom," replied Ron sarcastically.
"What does that mean?" asked Hermione, an eyebrow raised.
"I don't know exactly. I just got it from some old Muggle," shrugged Ron.
Little did they know that the term "smokin' doobies" meant "smoking dope". I learned it from my Algebra II teacher. He's an ex-cop that's really, really old, like from the sixties or something, and so he always uses old phrases like "doobies" and "tabackie" [tobacco]. He's always accuses students that are tardy by saying that they were smoking doobies in the bathroom or "swapin' spit" with their girlfriend/boyfriend. Oh dear me! I seem to have been trailing off the story. Better get back on!
"Hermione, what's with you today?" asked Harry, "You've been kind of out of it after you bumped her head."
"I have not-" began Hermione.
"I think it's because she didn't get a chance to study," answered Ron.
"Not true!" protested Hermione.
"Ah. That makes sense," said Harry, ignoring Hermione's comment.
"Are you guys ignoring me!" huffed Hermione.
"I'm sorry, did you say something?" asked Ron and Harry simultaneously. Ron and Harry faced each other and broke out in hysterical laughter.
"Boys," muttered Hermione.
*~*~*~*~*
The next week. . .
"Ugh. . .Potions with Slytherin today," said Harry. Ron put his finger in his mouth and pretended to gag.
"Oh no," moaned Neville.
"It's ok. We can be potion partners so that you won't embarrass yourself too much," reassured Hermione.
"Maybe I should just skip the class altogether," suggested Neville.
"Neville, I don't think-" began Hermione.
"Sure, why not?" replied Harry.
"Yeah. You've done it loads of times before," said Ron.
"Since when did-" began Hermione, but again, she was cut off.
"Yeah. . .just like last time," said Neville in a dazed voice.
Just then he jumped out in the hallway and began to sing and dance. Ron and Harry began to follow the same suit. Then, other schoolmates began to do the same as well. Soon, the whole hall was full of dancing students, except Hermione, who stood dumbstruck staring at what was happening.
Neville: I'm not strong, I'm not fast. When it comes to Potions, I just can't last. So I'll get out of class as I have in the past."
Ron: Like the time you wore the used full-body cast!
Neville: I always find a way!
Ron and Harry: He always finds a way!
Ron: No one can produce an excellent excuse like you!
Neville: What can I say? I always find a way!
(at the same time) Ron and Harry: He always finds a way!
Ron: A pathetic wheeze, a powerful sneeze!
Harry: The time you filled your ears up with cottage cheese!
Neville: And said it 'cuz of my bezoar allergies - That one got me out of Potions with ease! I always find a way!
Ron and Harry (and students?): He always finds a way! He can easily create, with do abbreviate, his Potions period state! He always finds a way! He always finds a way!
Just then, Professor Snape appeared in front of the hall. Everybody stopped singing and dancing. Snape cleared his throat and began singing in an opera- like voice,
Professor Snape: But not today!