Chapter Four...

      Wufei walked to the door, muttering, "Coffee. Need coffee." The others followed him at a distance, with Duo and Kathleen at the back of the group, muttering, uh, censored stuff. I'm tired of typing "censored" all the time, and so from now on it's just censored stuff, and you know what I just realized? It would have probably taken me less typing and time to type censored over and over instead of rambling on like I'm doing right now. Shuddup! Okay, on with the story.

      Just when Wufei started to open the door, the doorbell rang and the door flew open, casuing him to spill half his coffee. The door shut and they heard voices behind the door.

      "Put it on," a female voice said.

      "No, it hurts! YOU don't know what it feels like!" A male voice answered her.

      "Come on, for me?"

      "No!"

      "PUT THE COLLAR ON!"

      "Fine!"

      Wufei was just salvaging the rest of his coffee when the door flew open again, causing him to spill the rest of it. Standing there was a tall, thin, silver-haired, red-eyed girl wearing a leather vest showing lots of cleavage and matching leather pants. There were two guns resting on her hips and a chain in her hand that disappeared behind the door. A coffee cup came flying past her. Wufei pulled his shirt off and began to lick the coffee free of his shirt. The girl shrieked and ran back out the door, saying, "My precious! You hurt my precious!"

      The girl ran back in and pointed her gun at Wufei. Zeks followed, clutching his head where a cup imprint was. Kathleen stopped the censored stuff with Duo and looked at the girl.

      "Lee!" she said, recognizing the other girl from the karoake party. Without looking the new girl pulled her second gun and aimed it at Kathleen.

      "My name is NOT Lee, KATHY!" Kathleen glared and stole Heero's gun, pointing it at the new girl.

      Wufei shrugged and walked off, muttering, "Shower, then coffee." Shay followed him, whistling innocently.

      Heero looked from the new girl to Kathleen. "That's uh, my gun." Kathleen glared and stole Duo's gun and pointed it at Heero.

      "Now now, girls," Duo said, trying to take the new girl's gun. She glared and turned it on him. Trowa, feeling left out, grabbed his gun and Quatre's and pointed them at the girls. The new girl spotted Quatre and dropped her guns and jumped at him.

      "If you're on me, don't I deserve to know you're name?" Quatre said.

      "I'm...Fear?"

      "Yes, I am afraid of you, but what does that have to do with your name?" Quatre said.

      "I thought you were mine!" Zeks said. Fear turned to him.

      "No no, you're mine. There's a difference." Zeks crossed his arms.

      "I'm never wearing a collar for you agian." She jerked the chain and he fell forward.

      "Good boy!" she smiled and turned to the others, "So, um, where's Shay?" Shay came back with Wufei. She smiled up at them and whistled innocently. Then she saw Fear.

      "Lee!" she cried and hugged her.

      "I'M NOT LEE! If I could reach my gun, I'd kill you."

      "HUMANS DISTRACT ME FROM COFFEE!" he yelled as he went for the door, "Go mall I coffee." Fear starred after him.

      "Yes Yoda," she said, "Confuse you not I try to do." Everyone stared at her. She shrugged and pulled Shay off her, who was now asleep and handed her to Trowa.

      Quatre grabbed Fear and headed toward him room, Zeks dragging on the ground behind them. Duo watched them for a minute then said, "We can't be outdone. Come on." He herded Heero and Kathleen off to his room (how he did that I don't know). He turned back to Trowa and said, "Well, take her off, and do stuff." He shut the door.

      Trowa looked down at Shay, threw her on the couch and said, "No. She likes Wufei more than me. She hates me." He went outside, because of one set of bunnies at one end of the house and a second set at the other.

      Shay woke up shortly after, comtemplated getting up and filling pitchers of cold water and then shook her head. "No, I need energy for tonight. And if I did they'd get mad and find out who the wizard was because of the obvious clue in the livingroom that even a rock could see." As soon as she said it, she immediately forgot it. She ran outside to find Trowa (the wizard told her where Trowa was).

      Zeks runs out the door, eyes wide. "Epp! No! That's bad. I feel dirty."

      "You are dirty," Quatre said as Fear pulled his chain, causing him to fall back into the room. She locked the door and we hear Zeks' scream.

      Duo stepped out of this room, then heard Fear and the others still going on. He turned back, "Kathleen! Get the fun things back out! They're not done and we can't let them win!"

      Shay found Trowa setting on the steps.

      "Hi!" she said.

      "I hate you."

      "You WHAT?"

      "I hate you cause you hate me."

      "I don't hate you. I-" She's interuppted by a scream about pancakes. Shay shrugs and continues, "I, well, Wufei only saves me. He's more manly than you."

      "He's more WHAT?" Trowa grabs her and takes her off. "I'll show you who's manly!" 

      By that time, Wufei's back, driving a dump truck filled with various kinds of coffee, and one can of Sprite. He sees the Sprite can and shrieks.

      "NO! YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSE TO BE HERE!" then he changes to a whispering voice, while clutching the can, "They can't know I'm having an affair." He hears the various noises coming from the house and clutches the Sprite can. "Well, they're busy." He opens the can, sipping happily.

      Zeks pops out of the door.

      "Are they done?" Fear asked.

      "Uh, yes," he said in a desperate attempt to stop all the dirty workings going on in Quatre's room. They stop and hear the others on the other side of the house.

      "Liar!" Fear yelled and jerked him in, "Just for that we're tying you down!"

      Wufei happily soaked the house with kerosine. He smiled, he'd never liked this house. And he'd never sleep in it again, knowing THAT had happened. Besides, they had five other mansions. They'd move. He lit the house and smiled. If you can't beat them, and you don't wanna join them, SMOKE THEM OUT!

A/N: All these dirty thought come from not only me, but Kathleen, and now another co-author, Vampyress Suryna (Fear). 

Kathleen: I did NOT have those thoughts.

Shay: Duo.

Kathleen: No...think...good...thoughts...whipped cream...

Fear: Yes, I pushed for a sex scene.

Shay: She did it!

Fear: You wrote it!

Shay: So!

Kathleen: Whipped cream...

Fear-It's your fault!

Shay- Shuddup! You wanted it, you know it.

Fear-Yes and I liked it.

Okay, we still have coffee obsisions-

Kathleen-Can I have coffee in my whipped cream?

Duo-Hot...

And we have sprite obsisions now. The weird thing is I hate coffee AND Sprite. Oh well. The roof! The roof! The roof is on fire! Yes! Okay, I'm done. Read and Review! Please! Thank you and goodnight!