NIGHT OF THE AWALIM:
Chapter 5: Party Animals
Thankyou to everyone who has praised this saga, and made helpful comments. And especially to Severely Snaped, who speculated Susan Bones might be 'that sort of girl'. Apologies for the grim moments in this chapter, but even this has to have some sort of plot.
Severus Snape considered himself a man of the world, and a wiz of the wizarding world. If he did say so himself. Which he did, to his mirror every morning. He did quizzes in Witch Weekly so that showed he understood women. He could poison a student in ten seconds flat, so that showed his consideration(no sense letting them suffer). He had his previous familiar stuffed when it passed away. Surely that showed he was capable of love.
He was sure he was ready for this. He sat on Hermione Granger's bed and watched her get ready for work. She smoothed gold glitter up both legs. Snape wished he could help, but when he put one long, smooth hand on her, she smacked him away, half amused, half irritated.
"Not now," she said.
"Let me help."
"Believe me, you would not be helping."
She slipped on a flesh-coloured g-string. Snape swallowed. He'd never seen that item of her lingerie before. Sometimes showing not quite everything was more enticing than…. He tried to get his mind out of her knickers. Failed. Tried harder. Moved his attention to her breasts, as she squashed them into an orange a white sequined bra top. She pushed her breasts around until they settled well inside the cups. Long strings of beads hung down from a curving line across the centre of her breasts nearly to her waist. Whenever she moved, the fringing swayed. Hypnotic really.
Hermione pulled a long, orange split skirt up to her hips, and then began the ordeal of attaching a fringed and sequined belt over it. Snape watched in fascination as she applied safety pin after safety pin.
"Why don't you use magic?" he asked.
"I did once. I tried one that permanently fused the belt to the skirt. I had to be cut out of it." She was red in the face, half bent over, struggling to fasten a pin. "Come on, you son-of-a-witch!"
Snape produced his wand and muttered several words. The belt settled snugly around her, and all the safety pins dropped to the floor. Hermione grabbed his hair with one hand and leaned close to him.
"Tell me which spell you used!"
"Secret wizard's business."
"I'll kill you if you don't tell."
"Only graduates can use that spell."
"I'll hand you over to Carmel. No, wait, you'd like that. I'll hand you over to Colin Creevey."
Snape whispered the spell in her ear, and took the opportunity to kiss her neck. She smelled of a heavy, exotic perfume. His hands crept up to touch her breasts. Bloody hell, there was no getting through that bra. Twenty five pounds of sequins and beads rendered the bra immobile and armoured like dragonskin.
Hermione moved out of his grasp and brushed out her hair. She did a few stretches, then checked her dance bag. Veil, yes. Zills, yes. Music, yes. She was all set. Quickly, she applied some make up, the kohl around her eyes taking away the remnants of her English features and turning her foreign.
Snape enjoyed this. Underneath his bastard exterior he was a reasonable man. Under Hermione's Brit was Isis. He stood and reached for her just before she slicked on lipstick.
"Just a moment," he said, and kissed her thoroughly.
She struggled only a little. "I have to go to work," she said against his mouth, and slipped out of his arms. "Are you ready?"
He was ready. He'd seen her dance. He'd seen her practice many a time over the past three weeks. He knew every inch of her pliable body.
"Let's go," he said.
They Apparated to the student union building of Elvenbows University. The cafeteria had been taken over by Seamus Finnigan's birthday party. The room was full of rowdy students, many of whom Hermione knew. Snape knew some of them also, and wished he didn't. Ron Weasley, Neville Longbottom, the Creevey brothers(he'd steer well clear of Colin, who was as camp as a row of pink frilly tents), and many other students he'd taught over the years. There was Harry Potter, the Boy Who Made A Racket In the Next Room Every Night.
Hermione and Snape slipped quietly into the room, unnoticed. Hermione nodded to the women's toilets.
"I'll go in there and take off my kaftan. You take my music over to the dee-jay. Give me five minutes."
Snape nodded. How wonderful to be a lackey. His life's ambition fulfilled. He was glad he had studied six years at university, done a post-graduate degree, and taught at Hogwarts these many years. All so he could ferry Hermione Granger's music to…. Good gods, was that really Neville Longbottom dee-jaying? Had he not melted, dissolved or blown up the speakers yet?
Snape made his way through the crowd. A drunken woman pressed herself up against him, then shrank back.
"Hi there, big boy…..Oh, er….Professor Snape. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean…."
"If you'll excuse me, Miss Bones." Snape waited patiently. Then waited some more. "Perhaps you would be so kind as to remove your hand from my arse?"
Susan Bones grinned sloppily. "Sorry, is that still there?" She slid her hand off him and wandered away to grope…. That high-pitched scream could only come from Weasley. It was followed by some harsh language from Carmel Chong, and Susan went staggering through the crowd, winding up in another undergraduate's lap. Snape didn't recognise him.
He was accosted twice more on his way to Longbottom, and each time the person expressed astonishment, and/or horror at his presence. Finally, he arrived in front of Longbottom. The younger man took his eyes off the stack of cd's in front of him,and the rows of music crystals, and blanched. Snape didn't give him time to stammer.
"The…er…entertainment is here. Play this in a few minutes, tracks three through five."
"Yes, Professor." Longbottom took the cd, his hand shaking. He glanced from it to Snape, twice each. "You're not…."
"No, I am not!"
Relief swept Neville's face. Snape stomped back through the crowd to sit, back against one wall on a hard wooden chair. Always sensible to sit against a wall. One never knew when a Dementor, vampire or Susan Bones would come at him. He was also in line for at least Bronze in the Paranoia 100 metre Scream and Dash.
Snape saw Seamus Finnigan in the centre of the room, downing a quart of Firewhisky at a great rate. He had one arm draped around Carmel Chong, who had an arm around Harry Potter. Susan Bones was lying at Seamus' feet, shouting something about 'Take me now, before the white rabbits come again'.
Familiar wailing music made Snape prick up his ears. He'd heard the music many times now as Hermione practiced a new routine. People looked around, and then Carmel spotted Hermione in the doorway.
Hermione posed for a second, a vision in white and orange, and skipped into the room, arms above her head, brilliant orange veil streaming behind her. She circled the room in long strides, fringes on her bra and belt swinging, chocolatey hair rippling to her waist. A bimbo-esque voice on the cd said: "Boss Amany, tek, tek, tek", and the music changed to an up-beat beledi rhythm. Hermione stopped in front of Ron Weasley and did a series of hip lifts, showing off the nice crease of flesh above her hip. She turned rapidly and hip lifted on the other side, all the while smiling into Ron's face.
Ron grinned, reached out a hand. Hermione was not quick enough and Ron grabbed her, wrapping both arms around her hips. Snape was out of his chair, never mind that something could sneak up behind him.
Hermione wriggled out of Ron's arms and said something to him. The smile never left her face but she was clearly telling him "Look but don't touch". Then she Egyptian walked her way towards Clarissa Tarkington to lead her into some stomach pops.
Snape didn't think Ron had fully understood Hermione's instructions. He had turned to watch Hermione's backside jerking beneath the tight orange skirt. Snape's wand was ever-ready, just like the batteries.
Ron stiffened and fell to the floor. No one noticed or cared. It was that kind of party. Susan Bones let out a cry of delight and fell on Ron, struggling to manouvre herself on top of the enspelled redhead.
Hermione moved on to dance in front of Harry Potter. Harry folded his arms. No way was he going to risk Carmel's wrath. But he grinned and watched Hermione's considerable bust as she shoulder shimmied.
Hermione turned away to go do pelvic drops at Sandar Shiva. Harry collapsed. Carmel toed him with her high-heeled boot. No movement. The Boy Who Could Not Hold His Liquor was obviously passed out again.
Snape crept through the crowd. Sandar Shiva joined two of the Dream Team on the floor. He had dared whistle at Hermione. Snape caught Colin Creevey looking at him.
"Alohamora!"
A closet door opened and Colin was sent hurling backwards. The door shut after him. Best place for him, really. No one could see those batting eyelashes in there.
Hermione turned her attention to Seamus, who was waving his bottle of Firewhisky and singing "Spice Up Your Life" to her Turkish pop. The music changed to a slower, twining song, and Hermione slowed her movements, bringing into play figure eight's, corkscrews, and sliding hip drops. She lifted her arms and brought her veil sailing over her head to land around Seamus' shoulders. Drawing him close, closer, she did her best earthquake shimmy. Seamus tried to keep his eyes on her face, but failed. He looked down. The view was magnificent from up there. He could see miles of creamy expanse of bosom. As Hermione breathed, her breasts strained against the bra.
Seamus swallowed. Then he stiffened and fell to the floor, taking Hermione's veil with him. Everyone gasped.
The music played on, but Hermione ceased dancing. She looked up. Snape stood fifteen feet away, in the process of sliding his wand back into his jacket pocket, as casual as James Bond putting away his gun, as casual as someone popping a cigarette in their pocket for later. Then Hermione noticed Ron, Harry and Sandar on the floor. A whine came from the closet.
"I want to come out!" Colin shouted.
"Again," someone in the crowd muttered.
Hermione glared at Snape. "Did you do this?"
No answer.
"Did you? Unspell them now!"
Snape withdrew his wand again and sent violet bolts of energy to each man, except Colin. No one was too worried about him anyway. Harry and Sandar were helped to their feet. Susan Bones was pulled off Ron. Ron sat up, tucked his shirt in, zipped his trousers, and stood up, wincing. Either he'd hurt something when he fell, or Susan was a vigourous young woman.
Hermione tried to recapture the mood. She resumed dancing, but found everyone reluctant to watch her now. She finished eight minutes early to thunderous applause. Everyone was afraid not to to be loudly appreciative.
As Hermione left the room, someone let Colin out of the closet.
"Ooohh, it was horrible in there. All dark, and smelly. I thought I'd faint. Can someone get me a drink? Oh, I must sit down." He sat in a handsome man's lap. "Thankyou, my, you are pretty, aren't you? Quick, someone take a picture of us. I don't want to lose the moment."
Hermione stormed out of the room. Snape followed her.
"What the hell did you think you were doing?" she screamed. "I was working."
"They were giving you the eye."
"Of course they were. Everyone flirts with the belly dancer. How did you feel when I danced in front of you? Everyone feels like that."
"We are a couple now."
"That doesn't change anything." She hoped to hell it didn't. "I still do this. They are my friends. You zapped them."
"They wanted to sleep with you."
"Well, der. Every man thinks sleeping with a belly dancer would be good. Like we're extra good lovers or something."
Snape raised an eyebrow. "Are you saying you're not?"
Hermione rolled her eyes. She pushed open the door to the women's toilets and stomped inside. Snape paid no heed to the sign on the door and followed her.
"I'm not saying anything. Just never do that again. This is my work. I like it."
"I'm not sure I do."
"Read my lips, and weep. I like doing this. I'm good at it. I'm going to keep doing it. In front of women and men. And the men will inevitably look at my tits and arse. Some of them will try to touch, and if I'm quick enough, they won't. If you don't like it, piss off." She shrugged out of the bra, and worked the spell to undo the belt. Within minutes she was plain Hermione again
Snape took a deep breath. "Do you have to dance so….close to them?"
Hermione considered him. Poor bugger really was trying his best. She thought back to her fifth year at Hogwarts, when Dumbledore had instigated job sharing. Snape had had to share his Potions job with Sybil Trelawney. One day they found themselves sharing a laboratory. She wanted to use some of his mashed slugs. He'd thrown a complete hissy fit, turned the slugs into paste, turned Trelawney into a wallaby, and all the students into ice sculptures. Only temporary, except for the slugs, but still, it was clear he didn't share well.
"I'll make a deal with you. I won't do the veil around the neck thing any more, and you won't go berko when I dance out."
He sighed. "Agreed."
The door to the women's toilets slammed open. Susan Bones fell through the door.
"Gods, what's wrong with me? All I want is a man." She looked at Snape's shoes, then up along his legs to his crotch. "Hey, it is a man! Bloody brilliant!" She pulled herself up Snape's body. Snape tried to move backwards, but Hermione had her wand out.
"Immobilio," she said.
Snape was stuck. Susan threw her arms around his neck.
"I'll be back in a few minutes. See, I'm different from you, Severus. I'm a caring, SHARING kind of girl."
She left the room, casual clothes in place and only her eyeliner indicating anything unusual about her.
She wasn't really that good at sharing, but it would teach Snape a lesson. Perhaps she should have sent Colin Creevey in there. No, that was too cruel. Hermione collected her cd from Neville and spent some minutes in conversation. Then came the scream from the women's toilets. Padme Patil reeled out of the bathroom.
"My god, it's just too awful. Susan is…. oh, lord and lady, I need to sit down."
Hermione ran. Why did she have a really bad feeling about this? She threw open the door. Susan Bones had tipped Snape onto his back. His entire body was frozen, nothing moved, so Susan had inched herself until she was sitting over Snape's face and using his nose to……
"Get off there!" Hermione yelled. She suddenly understood Snape's ludicrous jealousy because she was feeling it herself.
She dragged Susan off Snape and tossed her into a toilet cubicle. The girl wrapped her arms around the bowl and wept.
"No one understands me. No one loves me!" The toilet bowl listened but didn't speak. A woman's best friend.
Hermione unspelled Snape. He stood, and washed his face. He didn't say anything. Hermione was sweating. Was this a break-up moment? Had she stuffed up completely? Snape gripped the sides of the wash basin. His knuckles were white.
"Hermione?"
"Yes?" Hell, she wished her voice didn't come out in that mouse squeak like that.
"Can we perhaps negotiate a truce? If you are coming to work at Hogwarts, I'm not sure I could survive another night like this one."
"I'm sure we can manage something."
"Good." He still didn't smile. "Now, can we leave?"
"It's Seamus' party. They're my friends."
"They're my ex-students," he said flatly.
Hermione sensed another fight in the offing. Then Carmel Chong burst in.
"'Mione. You've got to come see. Abdul Abeya has gone bananas. He's doing a belly dance up on a table. Come and tell him what he's doing wrong."
Hermione shrugged and made for the door. Snape followed her, dragging one leg behind him. Susan Bones was attached. She was still crying, but not as hard.
Abdul was on a table, waggling his hips and stamping his feet. He'd found a Quidditch baton and was whirling it around his head. Much as Snape was tempted to have something terrible happen to him, he restrained himself. Hermione waded into the thick of the crowd and joined in the shouting of "You're rubbish", "Take it off", and "Do the macarena".
Snape found his quiet corner. Susan was sozzled enough now to merely stroke his leg and snuffle into his kneecap. He let her.
He was a man of the world. In one evening he'd made lewd moves on a belly dancer, nearly had unwilling nasal sex with an ex-student, and put Colin Creevey back in the closet. All things considered, it wasn't a bad evening. He sent just a small zap of energy towards Abdul. The boy hit himself on the head with the baton. It was a better evening now.
***** *****
If anyone has any suggestions as to where this story should go from here, I'd be happy to listen. Should I inflict lab sharing at Hogwarts? Will their tempers get the better of them? Should Carmel make another play for Snape? And what of Susan Bones?