Second part (FINALLY!), thanks for all the ideas.
_______________________________________________________________________
Airplane Version
____________________________
[Stukov has just found out he's the only one who can fly the Battlecruiser,
his g/f Kerrigen is begging him to try and land it, and Raynor is trying
to get the auto pilot to work.]
Stukov: This isn't working, Raynor, how is the auto pilot coming!?
(Raynor pulled lever and the autopilot inflated and jumped right onto Raynor)
Raynor: I NEED ANOTHER MINUTE OR SO!!
Kerrigen: Please Alexi, you're the only one who can save us now
Stukov: Raynor!?
(Dr. Fenix comes in)
Fenix: I just want you all to know, good luck, we're all counting on you
(Leaves)
Stukov: RAYNOR!?
(Raynor was basing up against the wall trying to unhook the inflated pilot off
Kerrigen: LAND THE DAMN THING OR WE ALL DIE!
(Fenix comes in again)
Fenix: I just want you all to know, good luck, we're all counting on you
(Leaves)
Duke: Stukov, ease it down
(Crash-lands Battlcruiser)
(Fenix comes in again)
I just want you all to know, good luck, we're all counting on you
(Leaves)
[So, everybody turned out perfectly safe and happy, except for the inflated
auto pilot, who got sucked out the window]
Cagney Version
_____________________________
[Enter Kerrigen]
Kerrigen: What is it Jimmy?
Raynor: Arcturas, he's dead
Kerrigen: Oh my.........why did you call me here?
Raynor: I saw yous last night, and you was smooching with Arcturas
Kerrigen: No Jimmy, I'm in love with you!
Raynor: Sure, I believe you, only my C-239'er don't
[Raynor then emptied half a cartridge into Kerrigen]
The Godfather Version
______________________________
[Kerrigen sits in her office chair, across in the guest chair sits
Arcturas]
Arcturas: Kerrigen, Duke is dead, I want justice!
Kerrigen: So, you come to me on this day of celebration, and you are wanting
me to take care of these people ho killed Duke?
Arcturas: I want justice!
Kerrigen: Fine, I will ensure justice is served, in the mean time,
you need to be taught a lesson in respect.
[At that moment, Raynor pops out of a secret closet and blows Arcturas
away]
Austin Powers Version
___________________________
[Dr. Kerrigen sits at her desk stroking her Mr. Zerglingworth,
Miniyou sits in a similar desk, stroking mini Mr. Zerglingworth]
[Raynor bursts in]
Kerrigen: Ahhh, mister Raynor
Raynor: Give it up Dr. Kerrigen!!
Kerrigen: Well it seems you have a choice mister Raynor, save the world
or save..........
what the hell do we have of his? OH FORGET IT!! You can't save the world,
because I'm about to destroy the world with this!!!
(Curtain falls, revealing a Giant Laser, with Miniyou attempting
to hump it to death)
Kerrigen: *Nervous chuckle* Miniyou, stop humping the laser.....
Oh god, why don't you and the giant "Laser" get a fricken room for gods sake.
[During this time, Raynor slips up to Dr. Kerrigen, and pushes the self
destruct button, witch after the destruction of the moon base, he celebrates]
The Red October Version
___________________________________
[On the bridge of the Battle Cruiser]
Raynor: And so we play our game, a game of chess, against our old adversaries
the American star fleet.
For forty ears, your fathers and older brothers played this game, and played it well.
Ahhh, it reminds me of the days of Korhal and Senator Mengsk, when
the sector trembled at the sound of our missiles, and they shall tremble again
at the sound of our silence.
*Pause*
Uhhhhhhhhh, I reeeeeeeeeaaaaaaallllllyyy have to go, number 1
[And you know the rest]
Blooper Version
______________________
[Fenix death scene]
Cameraman: Speed
Director: And, action
*Fenix starts walking own the walkway and sees the horrible thing*
Fenix: *Snickering* HAHAHA Jimmy!
--
Director: and action
*Fenix looks, and see the horrible beast*
*Turns on his laser scythes*
(nothing happens)
Fenix: HEY, these damn things aren't turning on!
Hydralisk: THIS IS TAKE 78, I CANNOT STAND THIS, I will be in my trailer!
Fenix: Ohhh boy
[And Fenix went on to become a success (FINALLY) on take 456]
Mrs. Bucket Version
-------------------
[Rasagal is on the phone with the happily married Kerrigen]
"OH what's that dear?"
"Oh Jims taking up skinny-dipping, well that's healthy"
"He wants to do what?"
"Go swimming at the public pool in a bikini?"
[And so Raynor went swimming]
Sherlock Holmes Version
-----------------------
[Raynor and his assistant Dr. Stukov are at the house of DuGalle
investigating his murder(DuGalle's murder, not Raynor or Stukov),
while Kerrigen weeps in mourning]
Kerrigen: WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Alexi: Now, you must try to calm down, DuGalle's murderer will be found out
Raynor: But we already know who killed him Alexi
Alexi: We do?
Raynor: Elementary my dear Stukov
Kerrigen: Who?
Raynor: You me dear, you see, I knew almost immediately it was you.
First, because you're the only one who would do it anyways, and second
his organs are hanging from your wings.
[And Kerrigen was sent to prison for the murder of her husband]
Minority Report Version
-----------------------
[Kerrigen, Raynor, Arcturas, Duke, Tassadar, Fenix, Zaretul,
Alexi, DuGalle, Rasagal, Duran, Aldaris, and the Overmind, are all
socializing sometime before Starcraft game come into existence.]
Kerrigen: Well, I can't wait to see what happens in the future,
I mean, who knows...
(Duran and a squad of police burst threw the doors, windows, and skylights)
Tom: You're all under arrest for the future destruction of the Koprulu
Sector, and....
[Raynor then shot Duran, and all the Police opened fire and killed all of the heroes..
witch means that Starcraft never even happened, so wait.....
so that means...since it never happened WHY THE HELL AM I WRITING THIS!?
I don't know, I'm lost, I have no clue why.]
___________________________________________________________________
Ok, so if in the last version, Starcraft never existed, SO WHY THE HELL AM I WRITING THIS
HUH!? I DON'T KNOW! REVIEW PLEASE!
_______________________________________________________________________
Airplane Version
____________________________
[Stukov has just found out he's the only one who can fly the Battlecruiser,
his g/f Kerrigen is begging him to try and land it, and Raynor is trying
to get the auto pilot to work.]
Stukov: This isn't working, Raynor, how is the auto pilot coming!?
(Raynor pulled lever and the autopilot inflated and jumped right onto Raynor)
Raynor: I NEED ANOTHER MINUTE OR SO!!
Kerrigen: Please Alexi, you're the only one who can save us now
Stukov: Raynor!?
(Dr. Fenix comes in)
Fenix: I just want you all to know, good luck, we're all counting on you
(Leaves)
Stukov: RAYNOR!?
(Raynor was basing up against the wall trying to unhook the inflated pilot off
Kerrigen: LAND THE DAMN THING OR WE ALL DIE!
(Fenix comes in again)
Fenix: I just want you all to know, good luck, we're all counting on you
(Leaves)
Duke: Stukov, ease it down
(Crash-lands Battlcruiser)
(Fenix comes in again)
I just want you all to know, good luck, we're all counting on you
(Leaves)
[So, everybody turned out perfectly safe and happy, except for the inflated
auto pilot, who got sucked out the window]
Cagney Version
_____________________________
[Enter Kerrigen]
Kerrigen: What is it Jimmy?
Raynor: Arcturas, he's dead
Kerrigen: Oh my.........why did you call me here?
Raynor: I saw yous last night, and you was smooching with Arcturas
Kerrigen: No Jimmy, I'm in love with you!
Raynor: Sure, I believe you, only my C-239'er don't
[Raynor then emptied half a cartridge into Kerrigen]
The Godfather Version
______________________________
[Kerrigen sits in her office chair, across in the guest chair sits
Arcturas]
Arcturas: Kerrigen, Duke is dead, I want justice!
Kerrigen: So, you come to me on this day of celebration, and you are wanting
me to take care of these people ho killed Duke?
Arcturas: I want justice!
Kerrigen: Fine, I will ensure justice is served, in the mean time,
you need to be taught a lesson in respect.
[At that moment, Raynor pops out of a secret closet and blows Arcturas
away]
Austin Powers Version
___________________________
[Dr. Kerrigen sits at her desk stroking her Mr. Zerglingworth,
Miniyou sits in a similar desk, stroking mini Mr. Zerglingworth]
[Raynor bursts in]
Kerrigen: Ahhh, mister Raynor
Raynor: Give it up Dr. Kerrigen!!
Kerrigen: Well it seems you have a choice mister Raynor, save the world
or save..........
what the hell do we have of his? OH FORGET IT!! You can't save the world,
because I'm about to destroy the world with this!!!
(Curtain falls, revealing a Giant Laser, with Miniyou attempting
to hump it to death)
Kerrigen: *Nervous chuckle* Miniyou, stop humping the laser.....
Oh god, why don't you and the giant "Laser" get a fricken room for gods sake.
[During this time, Raynor slips up to Dr. Kerrigen, and pushes the self
destruct button, witch after the destruction of the moon base, he celebrates]
The Red October Version
___________________________________
[On the bridge of the Battle Cruiser]
Raynor: And so we play our game, a game of chess, against our old adversaries
the American star fleet.
For forty ears, your fathers and older brothers played this game, and played it well.
Ahhh, it reminds me of the days of Korhal and Senator Mengsk, when
the sector trembled at the sound of our missiles, and they shall tremble again
at the sound of our silence.
*Pause*
Uhhhhhhhhh, I reeeeeeeeeaaaaaaallllllyyy have to go, number 1
[And you know the rest]
Blooper Version
______________________
[Fenix death scene]
Cameraman: Speed
Director: And, action
*Fenix starts walking own the walkway and sees the horrible thing*
Fenix: *Snickering* HAHAHA Jimmy!
--
Director: and action
*Fenix looks, and see the horrible beast*
*Turns on his laser scythes*
(nothing happens)
Fenix: HEY, these damn things aren't turning on!
Hydralisk: THIS IS TAKE 78, I CANNOT STAND THIS, I will be in my trailer!
Fenix: Ohhh boy
[And Fenix went on to become a success (FINALLY) on take 456]
Mrs. Bucket Version
-------------------
[Rasagal is on the phone with the happily married Kerrigen]
"OH what's that dear?"
"Oh Jims taking up skinny-dipping, well that's healthy"
"He wants to do what?"
"Go swimming at the public pool in a bikini?"
[And so Raynor went swimming]
Sherlock Holmes Version
-----------------------
[Raynor and his assistant Dr. Stukov are at the house of DuGalle
investigating his murder(DuGalle's murder, not Raynor or Stukov),
while Kerrigen weeps in mourning]
Kerrigen: WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Alexi: Now, you must try to calm down, DuGalle's murderer will be found out
Raynor: But we already know who killed him Alexi
Alexi: We do?
Raynor: Elementary my dear Stukov
Kerrigen: Who?
Raynor: You me dear, you see, I knew almost immediately it was you.
First, because you're the only one who would do it anyways, and second
his organs are hanging from your wings.
[And Kerrigen was sent to prison for the murder of her husband]
Minority Report Version
-----------------------
[Kerrigen, Raynor, Arcturas, Duke, Tassadar, Fenix, Zaretul,
Alexi, DuGalle, Rasagal, Duran, Aldaris, and the Overmind, are all
socializing sometime before Starcraft game come into existence.]
Kerrigen: Well, I can't wait to see what happens in the future,
I mean, who knows...
(Duran and a squad of police burst threw the doors, windows, and skylights)
Tom: You're all under arrest for the future destruction of the Koprulu
Sector, and....
[Raynor then shot Duran, and all the Police opened fire and killed all of the heroes..
witch means that Starcraft never even happened, so wait.....
so that means...since it never happened WHY THE HELL AM I WRITING THIS!?
I don't know, I'm lost, I have no clue why.]
___________________________________________________________________
Ok, so if in the last version, Starcraft never existed, SO WHY THE HELL AM I WRITING THIS
HUH!? I DON'T KNOW! REVIEW PLEASE!