Author's note

Hello my fellow bright eyed citizens says the one stealing my friend Melanie's new quote! Yay! I rock! I finally worked out to do italic things! Oh this rocks and it's so much of a relief. That was really annoying me. Anyway. I'm not suffering from M.L.I.S.O.S anymore! But Bob seems to have disappeared. Oh well. I've got enough inspiration to pull me over a bit. Went to youth group, saw disturbing boy, but I was high on gum (yes it's POSSIBLE!) and probably acted like a person on Speed. Oh well. Anyway I forgot to put this in my last note thing. This is to BOL, who was wondering. I'm taking it that all elves are cute. I mean, elves are basically super humans cos they were the firstborn and awoke to the stars etc. They HAVE to be cuter than normal human male beings. This is what makes them so attractive to Gina because she is boy crazy (obviously) and always likes some good eye candy to gaze at from afar or really close up. Close up would be preferable mind you. But anyway. Onward and upward

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Chapter 6

"Have you the pleasure of meeting Lady Lindelë?" Haldir asked. His question was ignored. Devon already had her head in her two scrawny little hands muttering over and over why the world was so cruel. Oh well. What went around had come back and hit her in the face like a cold fish. But this was a GOOD thing, as Devon needed to be taught a valuable lesson like this in order to become a better person. And also, the look on Devon's face was really funny. Alice was stuffing her fist in her mouth trying not to laugh.

"Haldir, you can go now," She said, in a moment of sanity. Haldir obeyed. "You called?"
"I didn't know you were you," Devon grumbled. "If I'd known I wouldn't have asked." Alice looked at her with a raised eyebrow.

"You never made sense before," She told her. "I don't expect you to now I guess. Anyway. How's things?"

"You tell me," Devon snarled. "I got captured by Orcs, no thanks to you, and escaped. Yeah I'm fine."

"Excuse me," Alice said with a note of irritation in your voice. "In case it's escaped your small mind, I tried very hard to save your life. Even slew 24 Orcs. Even Legolas and a tracking party pitched in. You are as bad as your charming sister Elwaeglos." Now that managed to shut her up.

Hmm... Alice thought. I'm getting better at comebacks.

"Uh..." Devon said in reply. "Legolas helped to save my life?"

"Mostly mine," Alice replied snobbishly. "But partly yours. Devon. Give up on the idea that he is going to whisk you away on a white horse and ride off into the sunset. We're... kind of... sort of.... betrothed." Devon almost choked. The look on her face made Alice want to laugh even harder than she had before.

"WHAT?!" Devon shrieked. Alice politely covered her ears, which were now ringing as their sense was enhanced since she'd come to Middle Earth.

"No need to shriek," She muttered. "It's not like it's a big thing. It's not even official. Devon, let's face it. You dumped him for your cousin. You're crazy to even think he'd want you back."

"Well it's not fair that you dumped Greg!" She retorted, rather pathetically one might add.

"He forced himself on me," Alice informed her. "That, I think, gives me more than enough incentive to run for the hills. He's all yours if you want him by the way." Devon, from there on was silent.

The next day, Legolas decided he wanted to explore the land of Lothlórien, and to everyone's surprise decided to take Gimli with him.
"Can I come?" Alice whined the next day.

"Nay bain nîn," Was the patient reply. "There may be dangers, I do not want to sacrifice you to them."

"Ha ha ha, no," Alice trilled dryly. "I am perfectly capable of defending myself thanks very much."

"Aware as I am of this," Legolas began. "You would find it tiring."

"And this is from someone who hasn't yet been up the Gentle Annie track (which is far from gentle I might add) up Mount Holdsworth," She retorted. "Look Leggo, I am perfectly capable of trekking a few ks over flat land. Believe me, Lothlórien is just flat land."

"One does not trek over land in a dress," Legolas pointed out in matter-of-fact way.

"Don't you have some Xena warrior princess type attire?" Alice scoffed. "Or medieval type squire stuff? Why can't I just wear some of your gear and leave it at that?" Legolas raised his eyebrow as if to say Nice try.

"It would befit you if you stayed," He told her, smiling. She childishly kicked a tree.

"Being a Elven lady is so boring," She complained. "It's like watching paint dry. If my friends weren't here, I'd seriously be contemplating throwing myself off the Lonely mountain." Legolas looked horrified and Alice giggled. "Well. Not really. It's just there's no adventure. I come from a world where men and women are equal. I would like an opportunity to do some of the stuff that you do for once instead of being cooped up twiddling my little thumbs and learning Sindarin."

"I cannot claim that it is not," Legolas said. "You may accompany me."

"Huh?" Responded Alice, quite dazed. "I can come? You're serious?!" Legolas nodded. She preceded to bound toward him and gave him an asphyxiating hug. "YAAAAAAAY!! Thank yoooooou!!" Legolas didn't respond as he seemed to be turning blue.

"I cannot breathe!" He rasped.

"Heh heh heh... opps."

"A female Legolas?" Gimli regarded. Alice gave him an evil look.

"We're not THAT inferior," She replied. "All I can say is that you haven't realised that I lived for fifteen years of my life in a country covered in native bush. And that for 6 of those years, I would go on convoluted bush walks up steep, beaten tracks with lots of steep hills. Those were dangerous. There were spiders that could bite you and make you sick and possibly die. Plants that, if you brushed up against, made your skin break out in hives. And, if you didn't bring enough warm clothes with you, or you got wet and didn't have wool, you could die of hypothermia," she paused for breath and gestured to the lands of Lothlórien. "That, is literally just a small walk in the bush compared to what I've been through." Now, if Legolas and Gimli had been any other medieval males they would have stood with bemused, yeah right expression plainly clear on their faces. But since Legolas was an elf and Gimli a dwarf, Legolas's eyebrows were raised up to his hairline and Gimli's mouth was hanging open.

"I refuse to take a female on an expedition, she will slow us down," Gimli continued to complain.

"I was on the school sprint team in Year 9," Alice shot back. A sceptical look came from Gimli. "Yeah ok. So it was two years ago. But it's still relevant. And I'm still coming. Give me a set of weaponry, and I'll be sweet... I mean fine... oh whatever."

"Weapons?!" Gimli spluttered. "In the hands of a lady?" At this point, Alice was seeing red in the brightest shade. Stupid Gimli. Alice suggestively started singing a rendition of the chorus of 'Respect' by Aretha Franklin. She would rather be shoving him off the nearest cliff, or trampling over him in a Middle Earth form of a steam roller. It would be disrespectful though, and besides, Gimli had a mission. So 'Respect' would just have to do, no pun intended.

"Lady Lindelë is skilled in the arts of war Master Dwarf," Legolas replied tartly. A look of surprise and recognition glimmered across Gimli's face.

"Lady Lindelë?!" The news must have come as a shock. "The one from Rivendell who slaughtered all those Orcs?" Alice nodded smugly. Killing all of those orcs had come as an advantage. "Well, you must come then."

Alice dressed for the occasion. She was not sure if her great grandparents approved, but it would be fun. Some adventure at last. She didn't tell Gina, Carry, Beth, Nimithil or Carenmeril, but Elrohir found out, and gave his blessing. Since it was only a day trip, it seemed ok. Instead of a dress, which would cause problems in hordes, she was fitted with a rider's outfit, much like Elwaeglos's, the last time she had seen her. And she was given weapons, which made her grin. Tee hee hee. These would come in useful for certain death threats if Devon decided to misbehave. Not that Devon wasn't already trying to kill her as well.

Oh well... Alice thought. She went down the pavilion which housed the Fellowship of the Ring to meet Legolas and Gimli.

"Good morning," She chirped.

"Greetings Lindelë," Said a tall figure. It was Aragorn. "How be you?"

"I'm well thanks," Alice replied. "Yourself?"

"As well as one can expect," He told her gravely. "How be Arwen? Well?" Alice couldn't help grinning. She knew that was coming.

"Yeah she was good last time I checked," Alice said. "Where's Legolas?"

"I am here," Rang out his melodic voice from behind. Alice felt her heart jump as it usually did when he was appeared.

"Hi," She whispered. "Has Gimli arrived yet?"

"He is present," Came the even reply, gesturing to Gimli as if to prove his point. Gimli grunted as way of a greeting. Charming. Gimli reminded her of typical New Zealand males found on the rugby field and in country pubs. Alice had heard that Dwarves were unsatisfactory members of Middle Earth society by all the Elves she had been in company with. She thought they were just being prejudiced bigots. Alice hoped that Gimli would prove her wrong about his personality as if she had to be unnecessarily mad at another person she would scream. The expedition was to be a day trip and they would be back by nightfall, according to Legolas. This was pleasing. So the tramp would be about 6 hours, there and back, judging by the time. They were all to be deceived.

It started innocently, while Alice gazed in awe at the trees towering above her, and were probably the most beautiful plant life she had ever witnessed.

"Stop looking at the trees," Gimli snapped.

"For your information Master Dwarf... person... thing... whatever," Alice began "I haven't seen trees this awesome, ever." She was tempted by the almost irresistible urge to poke out her tongue, but she resisted the urge, chiding herself that it may imply something else entirely, and there was no need to make an ass of herself in the process. Middle Earth land was surprisingly flat and easy terrain to walk on, much to Alice's eternal relief. The trek was actually quite fun. But not for long. The small party of three were sitting down for a breather in a clearing of forest.

"We will head for Caras Galadhron in a short while," Legolas told them. "Night will fall quickly as it is winter here."

"Funny," Alice piped up. "I'm not feeling a bit tired or anything. After most tramps back in my former home, I just wanted to collapse and not get up for another lifetime. But then again, the terrain was steep, rocky, pine needle covered tracks and bloody tough on your ankles."

"You have remarkable endurance," Gimli complimented. Alice couldn't help but grin smugly. It sounded much like something Mildred would say. Gimli was beginning to increasingly remind her of the 6 foot tall girl resembling a viking warlord. They even looked alike. And, scaringly enough, they acted alike.

"Thanks," She said. "And I told ya." The peaceful moment was cut of by a distant clatter of metal.

"Yrchs," Legolas whispered in Elvish.

"Great," Alice muttered, her voice dripping with extremely evident sarcasm. She reached for her weaponry, only to feel Legolas's soft skinned hand on hers.

"That would not be wise bain nîn," Sounded the voice of reason as he bounded off to fight the oncoming army.

"Oh screw that," She muttered again, waiting for all of about 5 seconds, grabbing her archery tools and running after Legolas and Gimli.

When she got to where the two were fighting, she saw them being surrounded by the horrible creatures. So she could not be seen, she climbed a tree with ease. Sitting on the branches, she took an arrow from her quiver. With trembling hands, she fitted a arrow to her string and shot. Missed the orcs by a long shot and hit a tree. Damn. She took another arrow and fitted it to her string and shot again. It hit an Orc in the eye. She grinned. Suddenly then an arrow was aimed high at her forearm and stuck fast. Tears sprouted to her eyes as she tried not to scream out mouthing a silent 'ow'. It was then that Legolas caught her eye, and shot her a mixed look of concern and scolding. Alice climbed down from her tree. She continued to fit more arrows. When the fight was over, pale faced, she collapsed to the ground.

Stay calm, She thought. Or Legolas will die of a panic attack.

"Alice!" he exclaimed kneeling down beside her. "Methril nîn, are you all right?"

"Sort of," She replied dryly. "Just don't touch my arm." Legolas wrapped his arms around her.

"I warned you not to follow," He scolded.

"I tried to put myself to good use," Alice shot back. "Besides, I've always wanted to pull a Xena Warrior Princess stunt (Elvish style) since my first encounter with orcs." Alice smiled mischievously. Legolas paled.

"Do not do that again," He continued. "I will not have it."

"Why not?" Alice complained.

"If... I..." Legolas whispered and trailed off then changed his wording. "I do not want to lose you." Alice smiled weakly.

"I probably don't want to lose me either," She joked in a low whisper. Legolas chuckled wryly. "I wouldn't want to lose you either."

"Master Legolas," Gimli began, who had not noticed or tactfully ignored the scene. "It would be wise to take Miss Lindelë back to Caras Galadhron."

"I agree Master Dwarf," Legolas replied as the party headed back. The small party of three set back to Lothlórien, for food, healing and sleep.

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Did everyone enjoy that? Oh I hope so. We've been getting our exams back. So far, I've done pretty abysmally for me. 56% in Science, 67% in Maths, 70% in English (my best subject!! HAH! YEAH RIGHT! Was my best subject, until stupid Miss Davies stuffed up my marks) and so far I'm sitting on a 77% for Social Studies, only because we haven't got the last section back. Everyone did reeeaaally bad in the Treaty of Waitangi section (which is the last section that we haven't got back) according to Mr Wilson so I'm sitting there going "Oh no!". But apparently, shock horror, I'm right up near the top ten of the year group so I can' t have done to bad!! And I still haven't gotten French and Music back, but knowing my current record, I'm betting I did even worse in those because I stuffed music notation up SO BAD. But anyway. Enough of that. It's depressing. I better go, bedtime. Toodles noodles!!