Bellichan: Hello, fan people. I do not own Miroku or any other references used in this fanfic. However, it is so much fun to make a mockery of him, I have to post it anyway. For the manga version, wait and I will post it somewhere, someday.
*Note: Anything in ( ) is a comment by Bellichan!

A drowsy Miroku rose from a contented sleep as the rays of dawn's light peeped through the shades. He stretched and yawned in that Miroku way which tells you everything he thinks about is either perverted or based on money. (^_^;; well......) Arising from his bed, he knew this was the day he would begin his genre-wide quest - the quest to find someone to bear his lovechild! (Duhn-duhn-duuuuuuuhn! Fake grandeur and real sarcasm if you can't recognize it...)
Kagome, the early riser, plodded into Miroku's room in her slippers (who knows why she has slippers in Feudal Japan?). She yawned.
Aaaaaaaaagh. So, Miroku, today's the day, isn't it? The day you...you know.
Yes, Kagome, and I shall miss you. At this point, Miroku held her hands and began to move them faaaarther down.

Awww, all right.
Picking up his staff, he shifted, took a deep breath, and walked out the door.
Straight onto University Satellite.
(OK ok, I am making up fake portals to other dimensions. He has to get there somehow, doesn't he?)