5 - Father, Forgive Ray For His Sins

{ The Following Evening }

Debra peered into the kitchen and flipped on the lights. "Ray? For crying out--- Ray! It's 10:30! You're three hours later than you said you would be." She was visibly upset.

Ray shrugged and closed the back door, putting his work things on the table. "What? I couldn't help it, I had to stay late." He grinned at her. "You glad to see me?"

She ignored him and went to the stove, heating up the braciole.

Ray stared at her for a moment before taking a seat. His plan wasn't quite working as slick today. Sitting facing away from her, he said aloud, "Gaah... what's wrong? Come on. Debra?"

There was a long moment of silence. Finally, she walked over with the pot of sauce and a large serving spoon. She stirred it briskly, then pulled out a spoonful of the sauce, dangling it over Ray's lap menacingly.

His eyes widened in fear. "Oh no, not again!"

"Thaaaaaat's right Ray! Now tell the truth... why are you always staying late at the office?! You think I don't know what's going on? Pervert! Staring at Jodi all day and--" She quickly slapped away his hand when he tried to push the spoon back.

Suddenly the kitchen door opened. Frank Barone stomped in and announced, "I smell Braciole!"

He took a look at the situation between his son and daughter-in-law. "Hey, did I just walk in on a hostage situation?"

Ray groaned. "Yea Dad. Why don't you untie the ropes while I defuse Debra?"

Debra took the spoon and whacked the sauce onto his plate, making a loud clack sound. "Shutup, Ray. You don't do anything around the house, you stay at work all day to check out your new assistant, and when you come home all you want is dinner and sex. You don't even see your own kids!" She paused for a moment to catch her breath, then poked him a few times in the back of the head. "Maybe you'd be a better father if you were actually home more often!"

Stuttering for a moment, Ray angrily blurted out, "Well maybe I would be home more often if you were a better wife!"

"WHAT?" Her face turned ice cold.

Ray grimaced, regretting his words. "Ohh boy."

Frank simply shook his head and looked up at the ceiling. "Forgive me Father for my sins." He suddenly began to chuckle. "...But at least I haven't pulled a Ray Barone!"

"Okay Dad, that's very original," Ray replied as he rolled his eyes.

Debra blinked a few times, still in shock. "I can't believe you just said that."

He looked up but didn't dare meet her eyes. "Come on... I didn't mean it like that, Deb."

She tossed the pot onto the table. "Oh I'm sorry, is there a RIGHT way to say that you have a bad wife?"

As Frank began to help himself to the braciole, he whispered loudly "Don't answer! Its a trap!"

"Would it help if I just stopped coming home altogether?" Ray quipped, scratching the back of his head as he avoided her question.

"Keep talking, Ray. You won't be laughing when you're calling 911 from your mother's house in the middle of the night. Sweet dreams," Debra said sinisterly as she moved towards the sink and began to clean the pots.

Ray glanced at his father, then slowly lowered his head onto the dinner table and began to bang his head on it. Repeatedly.