Voila! Another chapter! With *gasp* MORE coming soon! Yay! Hmmm I really gotta start getting ideas for all my fics…

With the insane urge to start singing "We're off to see the wizard, the wonderful wizard of Oz!" we walked off to see Jon, who in my opinion, could actually have a head (or at least an ego) the size of the giant balloon cranium like in the movie.

"What are you humming? It has such an odd tune."

"Oops," I answered, "I didn't even realize I WAS humming. It's… just a song from my childhood. Pointless little ditty really."

We stopped just then at the huge oaken doors that seemed to be cut from one giant slab of wood. Either the seams were hidden or the jerks had cut down a 300 year-old oak tree to make the doors. Ugh, it better some sort of illusion. We walked in. Numair began to speak a mile a minute blabbering on about this and that. I did what everyone else that had ever come in contact with him did to stay sane during these kind of fanatical lectures: I completely and utterly ignored him, just "mhm-ing" and nodding at times. I suddenly felt as if I had flickered and the wall beside Numair suddenly glowed purple. Odd, I didn't tell myself to flicker… was I losing control of my new-found powers?

Wait a minute. PURPLE!? A certain red-haired woman was going to find multitudes of spiders in her bed one day. Oh yes… a plethora of large and small, furry spiders….

Numair began to speak again The only thing I could make out was,

"How did you know it was coming?"

"I didn't. I guess my body just sensed it and did the work for me." I replied.

Oh no. I got him excited again. He started blathering on. I could only catch the occasional word. Alanna strode out and apologized, explaining that it was necessary to test my powers. She was STILL going to find spiders in her bed. And soon. Perhaps her boots as well…

She looked Numair straight in the eye.

"Do shut up Numair. We can't understand a word of what you're saying"

Hmmm…. I was starting to like this woman. Pity I couldn't remember if I had ever even read the last SotL book, because I certainly didn't remember a word of it.

The King, after being brutally ignored for the past while cleared his throat.

"Could we begin on what we actually CAME here to do?"

Everyone turned to look at him, including me. I walked over beside Owen who also looked cruelly ignored.

"I'm wondering if you would like to go to Scanra to help in the border battles. You would mean a great advantage on our side. Yes Sir Owen, you're being assigned there as well."

Owen was grinning from ear-to-ear.

"When can we leave?" I asked.

"As soon as you want. I'm assuming you won't need an escort."

"No duh."

He looked at me, confused by the expression. I shook my head and said never mind.

"Pardon me, but I believe that I must go pack my bags." I said TRYING to be respectful. I didn't want to face up Jon in front of people who didn't know him personally. That would make him lose respect among his people, which leads to all sorts of rebel-type things, which are… not good.

"You're excused."

 I curtsied and Owen bowed, and then we both walked out of the room. Numair surprisingly STILL muttering to himself, and Alanna about THIS close to whacking over the head.

"That was… odd, to say the least." Owen commented as soon as the doors shut behind us.

"I agree wholeheartedly. I STILL really don't know what just went on, except for the being-sent-off-to-Scanra part."

"Speaking of which, we should go pack now. I don't know about you but I'm eager to get over to the action! Finally! The last time I was there before my Ordeal." Owen said excitedly

"Yup, I'll just be heading over to my rooms which are… are… help? Where are the ladies usually housed?"

He pointed an arm.

"Actually just down this corridor. They keep the ladies close to where the ballroom, hence "the action" is. They prefer it that way."

"Thanks!" I called back as I bustled (yes bustled. There really IS no other way to walk in gown like this. It just makes me itch to fuss around and gossip) with my skirts swishing. I came up to my rooms and noticed a sign on the door. It read:

You shall be housed in another more spacious wing if you desire to stay at the palace.

Your new rooms are in the north-east wing of the palace

The note was followed by a small map. I quickly followed the directions and made it to the door. My door. There, on a little plaque was the name I had given myself, Lady Keita of Sorrel Wood. True, there is no such fief but I needed a prestigious name. It just sounded REALLY good. I opened the door.

(The following is an extremely large description of my rooms, which I had to include because my cute country white-picket-fence décor style wouldn't let me NOT describe it fully. I happen to be an avid home decorator. You should've see my real rooms…they were amazing…*sigh* Again, for those who want to skip it… you know what cue to look for.)

Then gasped in shock. I stood there standing like a slack-jawed yokel for who knows how long. I finally had the sense to step in and close the door. The room looked simply amazing. I couldn't find WORDS! The walls, ceiling and floor had been somehow magicked into looking like a forest, completed with nature sounds and swaying trees. There was a deep fluffy green couch and 2 overstuffed armchairs in the center, with a nicely carved coffee table in the middle. The fireplace was also conveniently placed. There were random assorted shelves and furnishings around the sitting room but I didn't feel like inspecting them now.

There were 2 doors leading off the sitting room. I took the one on the right. It lead to a study of some kind, filled with books and a large beautiful desk. The walls were a pale blue, not that you could SEE much of it… books were everywhere! My hands itched to pick them up. There was a small brazier opposite the window to keep the room warm. Ahh yes… no more air conditioning or central heating. Damn it.

Oh crap. The washroom. What exactly constituted as a medieval toilet anyway? I rushed out to open the other door. It opened up to a moderately spacious bedroom, complete with a large fireplace, gauzy curtains, and a large window with a window seat. How'd these people know EVERYTHING that I liked in a room? How? The bed was a huge and fluffy, and covered with a pretty quilt, that matched my pale yellow walls. There was a large dresser and wardrobe to one side, and various shelves on the walls.

HERE!

I took a deep breath and entered the washroom, or privy or whatever they called it. There was a tub to one side, and a screen and stand to the other. On the tall stand was a steaming bowl of water. But the actual toilet. Not bad actually for a medieval affair. It was simply a box with a neatly cut hole in it. Normally they would lead out into empty air outside, but, this one didn't. Magic obviously. I wonder who designed that particular spell. Useful but odd. A shit-containment spell… weird. No smell either. GOOD. I washed my face, undressed, putting the dress neatly (sort-of) over the screen instead of piling it on the floor, and opened the wardrobe. I searched for SOMETHING to wear to bed. Ugh, every night gown was frilly and itchy and PINK. Nothing doing. I suddenly remembered my poor abandoned froggy PJ's. Thank the gods (odd to say that, back in "my" world I was an Pagan/Wicce, so I primarily used "Thank the fates" so be more discreet. Now I wouldn't have to hide it? Cool…) They were clean and washed and buried at the bottom of all my clothes. I put them on and quickly slipped into bed, under the voluptuous (can I use that to describe pillows and blankets?) covers. I fell asleep in record time, which in reality, constitutes as ½ an hour.

When I woke up, the sun was had just risen. Wow, that was crazy. I NEVER woke up that early… oh well, time to pack. A maid had come in and opened up my saddlebags neatly on the floor. Someone had already taken care of the obvious necessities, such as tooth-cleaning powder… powder? What happened to PASTE!? Oh well… loincloths, breastbands (not that I exactly NEEDED those *sigh*) cloth pads (I didn't need those either… yet. Hey! Don't look at me like that! It's not fault my body is messed up! Maybe it's because I'm so skinny…) and underclothes.

I opened up the wardrobe and dresser, taking out one plain dress for formal or something affairs, and multitudes of tunics, breaches and shirts, all in colors that somehow complimented my skin (which is hard to do). They ranged from browns to greens to purples and blues. When I mean multitudes of colors I mean MULTITUDES of colors. These people were obsessed with looking good. Once I had packed everything (somehow) into the bags I put on my comfortable traveling clothes and grabbed my assorted weapons. Bow and arrows, sword, the works. I got a manservant to carry my bags (the glories of being a "noble") and headed down to the stables where I assumed Owen was waiting.

He was. With his bags already packed up on his spare mount, and his war horse, he was all ready to go. I wasn't going to take a spare horse. Why bother? Shaylee wasn't about to get tired.

I fastened my saddle bags to my noble steed (couldn't resist) and got on gracefully. Thank the gods that part of the whole Tortall-teleportation deal was that I suddenly got a whole bunch of skills that I never had before. I could have never survived on a horse that long without it. We began to ride north when my stomach grumbled.

"Shit I forgot to eat breakfast!" I cursed

"How did you manage to do THAT?" Owen asked in disbelief, "I suppose that's another reason why you're so skinny?"

"I suppose," I answered sheepishly, "don't worry, I'll manage 'till lunch."

"Alright…" he answered dubiously but rode on. 3 hours of idle chitchat later, we stopped for lunch. (Actually you know what? I'm skipping the trip. It's utterly boring… nothing happened. Hey! NOOOOOOOOO that's NOT why I'm skipping the trip! I SWEAR nothing happened! Yes I DID get enough sleep thank you very much. Geez… you people with your dirty dirty minds.)

Finally with the sun setting, we neared Fort Mastiff.

"Hey Owen? Do you think I should make a spectacular entrance and scare everyone witless? That would be SOOOOO fun!"

"Well… can I join?"

"Sure! What do you propose?" I asked, "Just leaping from a wall? Appearing horses and all in the middle?"

"I say jump from a solid wall. That'll scare them all out of 3 years growth!" he answered eyes, glinting mischievously.

"Alright then," I told him, "Just hold my hand and once we're clear of the wall, I'll let go and we'll both appear."

He nodded and we both ghosted, walking quietly towards the wall. We picked a nice location and kicked our horses into a gallop, the leapt through the stone wall. I felt Owen tense in my hand as we passed through, and quickly dropped it when we were barely clear. We both materialized in mid-jump, sailing out of the wall, landing with a thump and to collective gasps, muttering and weapons being drawn. I smiled. The adventure had begun.

Whoopee! I have IDEAS! *sigh* this chappie wasn't as humorous as the others. I doubt that the next ones will be as well. It's turning into more of the action/adventure it's meant to be. Still good though! The next chapter will have some revelations that I think are pure genius! Hehehehe, my ego is swelling to balloon-Oz sized proportions… Well anyway once that chapter gets written anyway. I have like 6 other fics running around in my head with no plots… It's frustrating. Oh and in case you didn't notice, this isn't a new chapter. I decided Chapter 1 was too long. So I split it into 2. K? Chapter 5 really IS getting some progress though, 2 pages size 12 already and counting.