Title: Loving You
Author: DEVIL_Kirin
Pairing/s: HanaFujii, SenHana???, brief mentions of YasuHaru
Rating: -
Status: On-Going
Genre: Multi-Chaptered
Chapter: 3/?
Email: seraph_kirin@hotmail.com
Disclaimers: All disclaimers apply.
Archive: None. It will be posted on fanfiction.net and fandomination.net though so if you want it, you can take it for your site. Just tell me first okay? (although I seriously doubt that anyone would take this anyway...)
Author's Notes: This is in answer to Wowie's fic request. Please note that this story contains a great deal of sugar... and angst, now that I think about it... People who are strongly allergic to sugar and bitterness contrasting so "dramatically" are advised to keep away from this fic.
Short synopsis: Hanamichi met Sendoh at the park near his house. Will the Hentai/Smiley teach Hanamichi something about chances or will the Hentai/Smiley grab the chance to make a SenHana?
Therefore, so, ladies and gentlemen, on with the fic!
[Plain] - Author's shameless self-insert. Dun worry about mixing this up with Hanamichi's thoughts... It'll be differentiated enough... trust me... ^_^
[Italics] - Hanamichi's thoughts...
Italics - Some other person's thoughts (don't worry, I won't make it very confusing...) Only for the babble club, will this be Plain, ok?
Bold - Emphasis... *CAPS* for babble
Italics - Quote/flashback to other people's speech in the past...
S_K = Seraph_Kirin's Author Notes
D_K = What do you think? The One And Only Devil_Kirin, me, of course.
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Act 1, Scene 3
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Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all. -Alfred, Lord Tennyson
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Sakuragi strode resolutely out of the classroom. The look on his face was warning enough for anyone who wanted to follow him, including his Gundam and Youhei.
Somehow he knew he would sorely regret what he had set out to do. By accepting Fujii's tentative proposal, he was merely setting the poor girl up for more pain.
It was an extremely cruel thing to do to a girl, to any girl, as a matter of fact, even to the likes of the Rukawa Shinetai.
Nevertheless, somehow, he just felt especially bad to be the one to do this to her.
Especially to her.
But after talking the matter over with Sendoh, his outright rejection of the idea had faded to a faintly guilty protest at the back of his mind.
Why the change? You ask.
Well, for the answer, we would have to go back to the night before... when our beloved redhead most coincidently met the ace of Ryonan High...
^-^.^-^o^-^.^-^.^-^o^-^.^-^FLASHBACK^-^.^-^o^-^.^-^.^-^o^-^.^-^
"Sendoh...?" The stunned tone in the redhead's voice did not go unnoticed.
The said boy nodded the head amiably. "Fancy meeting you here."
Of course, Sakuragi being Sakuragi...
"Teme~! Sendoh! What are you doing here? Have you come to spy on the Tensai?!" Sakuragi watched the other boy approach him, uneasiness coiling deep down in his stomach.
Sendoh...?
Here at the Shohoku District?
What was he trying to pull?
As our redheaded boy fought with these questions, Sendoh took a seat in the swing next to him. "Sakuragi... what were you doing out here so late?"
"What the Tensai does is absolutely none of your business!" Sakuragi snapped reflexively.
"Ok... there's no need to get so testy y'know..." Sendoh held up his hands in surrender, not the least surprised by the boy's overly-defensive nature.
Then it hit Sakuragi. "Oi Smiley, what are you doing out here, near Shohoku, so late at night?"
Sendoh smiled sheepishly.
[D_K: Wow! 3 'S' in a sentence!]
Anyway, back to his smiling sheepishly... "Well..."
"I know! You were spying on the Tensai!" Sakuragi's oversized ego went up a notch.
Sendoh chuckled, amused. "As much as I would like to say I was... however, I wasn't."
Sakuragi scratched his head, puzzled. "Then what were you doing here? Watching the stars? It's not as if Ryonan does not have its own parks..."
Sendoh covered his mouth, but not before something that sounded suspiciously like a snicker came out.
"Teme~! What were you laughing at?"
"Nothing." Sendoh stifled his laughter, trying his very best not to offend the volatile red head. He definitely had no intentions of getting killed by Sakuragi long before his time. "Nothing." Meeting Hanamichi's disbelieving eyes, Sendoh smiled weakly, suppressing the urge to laugh in a way that will set a certain redhead on him. "Really."
Sakuragi sent the spiky headed boy one of his Talk-Or-You-Are-Dead looks. "Out with it. Why are you here tonight?"
"Why can't I be here?" Sendoh countered, smothering a grin in the process. "It's a free world, ain't it?"
Hanamichi gave the boy his patent Die-Rukawa-Die glares. "Sendoh..."
Sendoh had to bite his lip to keep himself from laughing. As it was already, Sendoh was very close to being killed by a renegade redhead.
{D_K: Wait... *ponders for a moment* What will happen if I do set Hana on Sendoh?
Sendoh: D_K...
D_K: Yes? *looks innocently at him*
Sendoh: Don't even think about it.]
"Teme! Sendoh!" Sakuragi grabbed the said boy by his collar. "Will you tell me or not?"
"Only if you tell him your very own sob story." Sendoh counter-offered, very possibly at the face of death itself.
Sakuragi hesitated. He did need a confidant for his problem, didn't he? If he killed Sendoh now...
[D_K: Not that I would mind. I'll pair Hana up with Ru 'stead... There's no one to stop me anyway... *Mega EVIL Smile*
Hana: Oi! *waves arms wildly* Don't *I* have a choice in this?
D_K: *smiles kindly* No.
Youhei: Anou... isn't this supposed to be a HanaFujii? *scratches head thoughtfully*
D_K: Now that you remind me...
Youhei, Hana: *sweatdrop* Seraph... Please, please, PLEASE come back soon...]
...he wouldn't have anyone he knew well enough to help him with this... would he?
As extremely reluctant as he was to let go of the chance to smash in Sendoh's face...
[D_K: *dodges rotten tomatoes thrown by Sendoh fans*]
...Sakuragi nevertheless let go of the said boy's collar, allowing him to settle back peaceably onto the swing.
"Well?" Sendoh prompted gently. "Aren't you gonna start? Or are you gonna wait for X'mas?"
Sakuragi heaved a sigh, wondering why in the eighteen hells did God decide to send him a smiley, of all the people in the world, to help him with his problem. Why would he choose to confide in Sendoh, when there were people who understood him more, like Youhei? Why indeed... Sakuragi snapped out of his reverie, realising that Sendoh was still waiting for him to start.
"Well... It's like this..."
30 minutes later...
A heavy pause hung in the air after Sakuragi finished his tale of woe.
The self-proclaimed Tensai waited for Sendoh's response.
Nothing.
He waited some more, thinking that Sendoh needed more time to solve a complex problem such as this. [After all, it's not as if he's had to sort out this sorta problem before... ]
[D_K: Dream on Sakuragi... Dream on.
Hana: What? The Tensai is obviously more popular than the baka Smiley!
Sendoh, D_K: ^_^;;;]
[...And this problem is one that even the Tensai cannot solve on his own, what say someone who is beneath the Tensai's ability?]
Still nothing. Not even a single peep made its way out of Sendoh.
Sakuragi could've sworn that the park, quiet though it was, was making a whole lot more noise than Sendoh. He would've shaken Sendoh out of his trance, if not for the fact that he, the egoistical Tensai of Shohoku, was the one asking Sendoh, whom he had always considered beneath him, for advice.
Therefore, given the reality that he had little choice other than to wait for Sendoh to snap out of it, Sakuragi chose to wait some more.
*Birds chirping in the trees.*
*Leaves rustling on the ground.*
Sakuragi's patience finally ran out.
[D_K: I seriously didn't think he'd hold out this long though... Is the sky gonna fall anytime soon?
Hana: Teme! *lunges for Devil*
Youhei: Matte, Hana! *becomes a man-made obstacle in front of Hana*
Hana: Give me one reason why I should not kill her!
Youhei: Wowie-chan said she would prefer to have some yaoi sentiments in the story.
Hana: So?
Youhei: Specifically... Wowie-chan wanted a little RuHana and SenHana...
Hana: *turns into rock*
D_K: Did she? I don't really remember... but since you mention it... *MEGA evil Smile*
Hana: *depetrifies* MITO YOUHEI... *reaches out with murderous intent*
Youhei: Ehehehe... I just remembered I have another appointment. Ja! *dashes off before Hana reaches him*
D_K: He's fast, that Youhei.
Hana: *sits on the floor and sulks* Just wait till I get a hold of him, that no-good... *voice trails off*]
Our redhead reached for Sendoh, an evil gleam in his eyes.
Sendoh, coming out of his self-induced trance, backed away from Sakuragi without a moment to lose. "Down, Sakuragi. I was just... thinking about your problem."
Sendoh sweatdropped as he watched Sakuragi drop the tree branch that the redhead had originally wanted to hit him with. Letting out a relieved sigh after watching the branch drop to the ground, Sendoh said, "it was just that... I couldn't exactly imagine you with a girl problem..."
Oops.
That was definitely NOT the right thing to say, was it?
Definitely not.
Sendoh sweatdropped as the red head turned to him with a murderous gleam in his eye. "Sa- Sakuragi... Put that down... what I meant was-"
WHAM!
Ouch.
Sendoh grasped his head in his hands, an unsightly bump raising up unceremoniously among the numerous spikes on his head, and one must note that for once, the spikes didn't look so spiky anymore.
[D_K: Of course! Try spiking your head, then banging it against a stone wall. THEN personally see if the spikes will stand up after that.
Sendoh: I resent that.
D_K: But you can't do anything about it, can you?
Sendoh: *Stays quiet* ¬_¬
D_K: Good! ^_^ I just LOVE being an author.]
"Sakuragi... that was unnecessary, you know?" Our now chibi-mode Ryonan Ace rubbed his bump woefully, looking at the said boy with tears in his eyes. "You knew I didn't mean it." Sendoh turned on his hush-puppy eyes to full power.
"Hmph," was the redhead's reply. He was too annoyed to care.
"But really," all signs of pretence were now gone from Sendoh's face. "I have to ask you this."
"What-?" Sakuragi was thrown off guard by the quick switch in Sendoh's mood.
"How do you feel about her?"
"I- I-" Sakuragi became momentarily tongue-tied.
"What did you feel like doing? When she first asked you, that is." Sendoh's eyes bored holes into Sakuragi. For once, Sakuragi felt as if Sendoh was mind-reading him.
"I-" Sakuragi's shoulders slumped. "I-" He hesitated, swallowed, and then continued. "I wanted to accept her proposal." He admitted, fatigue showing.
"Why?"
"I- I thought I could make Haruko-chan jealous and- and-"
"..."
"I told myself that Fujii-san would help me forget Haruko-chan..." Sakuragi appeared to be gaining confidence. "And then I... and then I..."
"Then?"
Sakuragi released the pent-up breath he had been holding all this while. "And then I told myself... 'It's not fair to Fujii-san, it's not.' She would always be second-best... in my heart... to Haruko-chan... and I... knowing how being forever second-best felt like... I couldn't do that to her." He stopped, then continued quickly. "She hasn't done anything to deserve that. Nobody deserves that sort of treatment. She deserves so much more... so much more than what... than what I can offer..."
Sendoh smiled. "I'm glad."
"Why?" Sakuragi looked at Sendoh as if the boy had just grown another head. "I've just confessed to you how I wanted to wreck a girl's feelings forever and you say 'I'm glad'?"
"I'm glad..." Sendoh paused, phrasing his words in a way that would be non-offensive to the redhead. "...not because you thought of all the wrong things. Heck, anyone would, being in your sorta situation. Hell, even I would," he added, "if I were the one facing this, and not you."
"So what's your point?"
"I'm glad because you didn't do it, even though you were, most admittedly, tempted to. You stopped yourself and gave yourself time to think about this, and did not jump to a spur-of-the-moment decision and that," he gave Sakuragi a meaningful look, "is worth more than anything in this whole damned world."
Sakuragi stared at Sendoh...
...Raised his hand to Sendoh's forehead...
... And checked for the boy's temperature.
Sendoh sweatdropped. "What are you trying to do?"
"Checking for a fever." Sakuragi measured the smiley's body temp against his own.
[D_K: Yaoi thoughts, anyone?
Sendoh, Hana: Don't even think about it.
D_K: Sue me.]
"None?!" His astonishment showed. "Then you must be an extraterrestrial. The real Sendoh Akira would never say such profound things... It's simply not him!" Sakuragi promptly dashed behind a bush.
Sendoh face-faulted. "Sakuragi, I assure you that I'm the authentic Sendoh Akira and that I am hereby perfectly normal."
Sakuragi peered at him. "Are you sure?"
"YES!"
"That's good enough for me." Said Sakuragi cheerily as he strolled out from his 'hiding place'.
Sendoh fell to the ground anime-style. Picking himself up in an as-dignified-as-he-could- manage-it manner, he coughed awkwardly, "Well... back to your problem..."
"Yeah." Sakuragi promptly became depressed once more. "You didn't tell me anything I didn't already know... an you didn't offer me any solutions either." He pointed out.
"I can't." Sendoh said. "It's not that I can't offer you any, but I can't."
"Why not?"
"Because you have to make up your own mind in this whether you like it or not." Sendoh said sombrely. "Provided, there is no real solution to this anyway."
Sakuragi glared at Sendoh. "Big help you are."
Sendoh sighed. "Look, you're looking for a way out that will not hurt any one of you, right?"
"Yes, so?"
"There is no such way. It's either you get hurt, through watching Haruko and Yasuda together, or this girl... Fujii-san, right? ...gets hurt. That's all there is to it."
The redhead's face fell. "That the best you can offer me?"
"Well, not exactly."
He brightened. "Well? Out with it!"
Sendoh shook his head lightly, amazed at how helpless the redhead seemed before a simple (for the likes of Sendoh only) problem such as this. "Do what you want to do." He watched as the redhead's face fell again.
"That's easy for you to say." Sakuragi muttered. "You're not the one facing this problem."
"Sakuragi, I'm not asking you to marry her, for god's sake!" Sendoh's patience had finally worn thin.
"But you're not much help either way, aren't you?" Sakuragi shot back.
"..." For once, Sendoh had to admit that the redhead was right.
"Anyway, it's getting late, so..." Sakuragi got up from his swing. "Thanks, anyway."
Sendoh gaped at Sakuragi.
"What?" There was just the slightest trace of irritation in the redhead's voice.
"This must be a dream." Sendoh pinched his cheek. "Ouch! Thought not." He looked at Sakuragi in pure incredulity. "Did I just hear you say 'Thanks'?"
"Teme! Are you implying that the Tensai has no manners?" Sakuragi swung a fist a Sendoh.
Laughing, Sendoh dodged the blow. "Joking, Sakuragi. Just joking."
"Hmph." Sakuragi turned away, but not before Sendoh saw a trace of a smile beginning. "Well then, Ja, Smiley."
"Ja, Sakuragi. Oyasumi."
"Oyasumi."
Sendoh watched Sakuragi go off a distance before the said redhead turned and yelled, "Oi Sendoh! If your 'advice' helps me out, I'll treat you out for lunch!"
"I'll hold you to that, Sakuragi!" Sendoh obligingly answered.
Sendoh watched the redhead finally leave the confines of the park. "I wish you the best of luck, Sakuragi," he smiled bitterly. "Seeing that my own advice has not helped me in the least."
[D_K: How's that for suspense? Yaoi implications all over the place... well... not really, but the end of the flashback is enough for people to ask questions.
Sendoh: I. Am. Not. Gay.
Hana: So. Am. I.
Sendoh, Hana: *advances on D_K with murderous looks on their faces*
D_K: I know. ^_^ That's why it's so fun to make you guys look gay.
Sendoh, Hana: ¬_¬;;; *backs off... for the moment.*]
^-^o^-^.^-^.^-^o^-^.^-^END OF FLASHBACK^-^.^-^o^-^.^-^.^-^o^-^
Sakuragi now stood in the shady alley between the gym and the school building. (Think the alley where Miyagi and Sakuragi first met each other.)
What was taking Fujii so long?
Fujii came running round the corner, breathing hard. One did not need to be a genius to know that she had run all the way from the third floor of the school building to the appointed meeting place.
"I'm so sorry I'm late." Said she, gasping between breaths.
Sakuragi felt a prick of conscience. Should he... no, could he go through with this? Knowing that she would be indefinitely hurt later on?
He prayed that he would not be condemned for what he was going to do... and yet he knew that there was no excuse for what he had CHOSEN to do... not from how he saw it anyway.
"Fujii-san..." He felt, rather than saw, the girl stiffen.
[D_K: Scratch the "Sakuragi's POV" all the way thingy. From here on, until the end of this story at least, this will be Fujii's POV. I'm so kind to allow her to angst, don't you guys think so too?
Hana: ... Demon in disguise.
Sendoh: Wolf in sheep's skin.
Youhei: No comment.
D_K: *waves gaily* Thanks for your compliments, guys!!
Hana, Sendoh, Youhei: ... ¬_¬]
Fujii lowered her head.
This was it.
He was going to reject her.
She felt tears start to burn at the back of her eyes.
"..." [D_K: This silence belongs to Sakuragi, if you're wondering.]
Why was he drawing this out? Once he got this over and done with, she could go to the ladies room and sob her heart out.
I can't take anymore of his kindness(?)...
[D_K: Am I reading this right? Did I just type Sakuragi's 'kindness'?
Hana: Teme! The Tensai is always kind!
D_K: ... ¬_¬
Hana: What? Why are you looking at me like that?
D_K: Self-Praise = International Disgrace.
Hana: But it's better than having no praise!
D_K: That come-back sounds familiar... when, or who, did you learn that from?
Hana: From Seraph. She taught me this in case I needed a handy come-back about my consistent self-praise.
D_K: Figures. Did she also enhance your extremely limited vocabulary as well?
Hana: Of course! She said something about having to do GP, or something like that, anyway.
D_K: I definitely have to speak to her when she gets back...]
"Let's give this 'us' a try."
Fujii looked up in shock.
^-^.^-^o^-^.^-^.^-^o^-^.^-^ T. B. C. ^-^.^-^o^-^.^-^.^-^o^-^.^-^
Author's Notes: I know the ending is clichéd but I can't help it. Crappy chapters deserve similarly crappy endings, don't you think so? I seriously feel that this is crappy... and not up to my demonic standards... Not. In. The. Least.
Flame me. I'd love that. Makes me wanna read all the 'fan' mail and blast them later. And oh, did I tell you I'd be the one writing the next few chapters? I wonder if I can add more bits of angst? Now... wouldn't that be fun? *snickers*
Oh yes, Wowie-chan, Seraph left a message for you LONG before she expired (though regretfully, only temporarily). It's way down there... Of course, you can't expect me not to add bits and pieces of my own... can you? *EVIL smirk*
Anyway, see you guys soon... very, very soon...
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