AUTHOR'S NOTES: Wow, I'm finally back!!! I didn't write any chapters during the summer, even though I had more time. sigh And now back at school, I'm actually going to try and finish this fic and start another one. Thanks so much to the few people that reviewed. If it wasn't for you, I don't think I'd start writing again ^_^, but I do have lotsa ideas for this fic. Just sometimes too lazy to type them out. If you have any ideas for me, or you think you know what's going to happen, please REVIEW!! I LOVE reviews!! Now enough of this, it's time to go on to the FI…I mean, DISCLAIMER!!

DISCLAIMER: Honestly, what's the point of doing this for every chapter?? I DON'T OWN ANY PART OF DIGIMON NOW, AND I PROBABLY NEVER WILL!! Now it's ON TO THE FIC!

THE THINGS WE DO FOR LOVE – PART 6

By: Heero

FOR LOVE OF TAI – MATT

MATT'S POV

…..What can I say?? I'm shocked. I can barely believe what I'm seeing. I knew it must have been something big to throw Izzy off his rocker like that, but never in a million years did I expect something like this to happen. I mean, how could MY Tai be kissing someone else, that someone else being no less than the Digimon Emperor?!?!?!

Well, I guess he isn't exactly MY Tai, but still. I love him, or should I say I loved him. I didn't mean to, nor did I want to. It just happened. I've always been a distrustful person. Ever since my parents got divorced and separated me and T.K., I haven't trusted anyone but myself. I never wanted to get hurt again, so I just never let anyone get close enough to hurt me. Everything was going fine until my dad forced me to go to that summer camp.

I didn't want to go in the first place. I hate camps. All that garbage about holding hands and singing around a campfire. What's the point? But my dad forced me to go. I made up my mind to hate it right from the start, not like there was any way I would like it to begin with. Then I saw T.K., my little brother. I didn't see him all that much, hardly at all. I missed him. He was the only person in the world that I trusted. He was my little brother, who would never hurt me. He depended on me to take care of him. I know I made that promise to hate camp, but just seeing T.K. made me feel a lot happier about being there. That is, until I met Tai.

The second I saw Tai, I was both attracted and repelled. He was pretty cute. Yes, I knew I was gay back then. That was one of the reasons I insisted on being a loner. I didn't want friends that would turn on me when they found out my sexual preference. Yeah, well, Tai was pretty hot, with his messy hair and, as I would soon find out, his trademark grin. But the minute I felt attracted to him, I was disgusted with myself. I couldn't fall for him. What if he broke my heart? No, I had to be cold and distant, like I always was. It wouldn't be hard. I'd had lots of experience. But no amount of experience could have prepared me for Hurricane Tai.

That's exactly what Tai was: a hurricane. He hit hard and unexpectedly. Immediately, he came over and said hi to me, wanting to be friends. I hadn't expected that and my resolve nearly crumbled. I envisioned a fairy tale for us. We would become friends. I would tell him I loved him, to find out he loved me too. But I quickly banished that dream. My life would never have a fairy tale ending. He was so nice and friendly, I was sure he would be really popular, especially with the girls. If he found out I was gay and liked him, he would be disgusted and would probably never speak to me again. Better to be safe than sorry. I would ignore him and get over him.

He seemed hurt for a second, but those chocolate eyes quickly covered any hurt that might have been there. I must have imagined it. He almost didn't seem to notice that I wanted him to go away. I could have screamed. Why didn't he leave? Did he want to torture me into giving in? Then he made friends with T.K. I was immediately jealous, of both Tai and T.K.

I was jealous of the way Tai could make friends with anyone and everyone so easily. He seemed to get along so well with T.K. and I could tell T.K. really liked him. Except for the fact that Tai and T.K. didn't look remotely like each other, anyone would think they were brothers, the way they were joking around. I almost wish I could be like that with T.K. I mean, we really are brothers. But that just isn't me. But I wish T.K. wouldn't go around making friends with everybody. We haven't been able to spend much quality time together. We should use this time to hang out, without anyone else, especially not Tai.

Also, probably for the first time in my life, I was jealous of T.K. He hadn't been too affected by the divorce. He was still young and so trusting. He was optimistic where I was pessimistic. He hadn't lost hope. I wish I could be like that. Turn back time to when life was still wonderful and I wasn't afraid to trust in people and believe in dreams. Then I could be friends with Tai like T.K. was. Then I could hope that maybe, just maybe, Tai would eventually fall in love with me and I would have that fairy tale ending. But for me, life isn't a rainbow. All I can do is be jealous of those who have that perfect life, like my own brother.

I needed some alone time to think things over and since T.K. was too busy making new friends, I went off by myself. I hated myself for being jealous of my little brother. Tai definitely wasn't worth it. He probably wasn't all that great anyways. I would stay far away from Tai. Well, as far away as I can considering the fact that I'm in the same cabin as him. I would be really nice to T.K. and spend as much time as I could with him, hopefully with Tai and any other people far away. When I made up my mind, I was almost happy. This summer camp would be better than I thought. Boy, was I wrong.

It turned I was one of the Digidestined kids sent to save the Digital and real world. I could still spend time with T.K., but I wasn't too happy about that. He was so young and as I soon realized, this Digidestined business was pretty dangerous. Unfortunately, there were other kids I had to put up with. We were soon to be a team that stuck together. That made it rather hard not to get close to them. The worst part was that Tai was one of them.

Seeing Tai almost every minute of every day drove me crazy. I was getting to know him whether I wanted to or not. The more I learned about him, the more I liked him. He was brave, caring, loyal, friendly, and he had a great heart. But no matter how much I learned about him, I was still wary about letting him find out about me. If I let him get too close, I just knew I would get burnt. So I hardened my heart. I was cold to him. Actually, I was cold to everyone (everyone except T.K. of course), but I was especially cold to Tai. We fought constantly, arguing over the smallest details.

The fights hurt me, emotionally, not physically, though Tai did pack a mean punch. You see, even while I was struggling to stay indifferent to Tai, my heart was drawing closer to him. So I hurt inside everything I fought with him. There just came a day when I said to myself, it's hurting me not being Tai's friend. I might as well trust in him and be his friend. If he does hurt me, it can't be more than the pain I feel now, being forced to stay away from him.

At first, I thought I had made the right decision. The time when Tai fought against Piedmon by himself, and nearly died, which would have killed me. I saw him like that and my heart nearly broke. Then, when I heard what he said, my heart did break. He trusted me and always looked at me as his friend, even though I had been so stupid. I hadn't always acted like the best friend, but when his life was on the line, he had faith in me. I was so happy. My only regret then was that I hadn't let down my guard earlier on.

After that incident, we were the best of friends. Sometimes, I even thought that Tai might even like me as more than a friend, the way I loved him. I had been planning to tell him soon. I had written a song, just for him. I had practiced it for days, even weeks, just to get it perfect for him. At out next concert, I was going to sing that song, dedicating it to "my only love." I would have made sure Tai, oblivious as he is, would have known it was him.

But that will never happen now. I was wrong. I never should have let myself get close to Tai. Sure I've had great times with him, and I've been happy, but it's all turned upside down now. My heart's been broken beyond compare. I had started trusting and hoping again, but now I know that happiness doesn't exist. It's only an illusion. Now I see, and I will never let myself forget it. There is only pain and hurt in this cruel world. I will live unhappily knowing this, but I will never again try to trust and hope, because my heart won't be able to stand another let-down like this.

I trusted Tai. I loved him. I dreamed of the day when I could hold him and tell him I loved him. That day will never come, because he has chosen the Digimon Emperor. Not only has he destroyed any chances of us as a couple, he has destroyed any chances of our friendship to continue. As of now, Tai and I are just acquaintances, nothing more. Why does he have the power to hurt me like this? I HATE him. I will NEVER forgive him for this.

END OF CHAPTER 6

END OF MATT'S POV

AUTHOR'S NOTES: Finally another chappie is done. Sorry it took me so long. I've been so lazy for so long, then when I actually started writing again, I was busy. I'll try to get up a chapter a week from now on . HOPEFULLY. I'm not promising anything. Now, if you all review, I'm pretty sure more chapters will go up ^_^ So PLEASE review. Criticism, ideas, comments, anything you want to say?? I'd be happy to read it! SO PLEASE REVIEW!

*The next chapter will PROBABLY be in Tai's POV. Or maybe Ken's. I'm not sure yet.

So 'til next time, Ciao!