Chapter 4

Cole watched Vic and the other Detective leave before returning to his post at Mel's side. He sat down next to her and took her hand in his again, watching her chest rise and fall for several minutes in silence. She was no stronger than she had been before, but not any weaker either. It was, he supposed, something. At least she did not feel lonely any more.

"Would you like me to sing now, Mel?" he asked finally.

There seemed to be some uncertainty as to whether or not she was capable of hearing and understanding him, but Cole did not care. She might be able to, which was the only thing that counted. And she could definitely feel his presence. He could tell that by the little shift in her life-force every time he touched her. The nurses had seen him talking and singing to her and had mentioned that many patients seemed to do better with a loved one speaking to them sometimes. It had been all the encouragement he had needed to continue. He probably would have anyway.

"Vic was here," Cole told her. "He was praying something called a Rosary. Jess and I have both prayed, too. Jess hasn't come to see you yet, but she will, Mel. I know she will. She's like you, braver than she sometimes thinks." His gloved hands gently brushed a few stray curls out of her face. "They say that we probably won't have to wear these gloves and masks for much longer when we visit you. I'm glad, Mel. I like touching you. The gloves and this mask feel funny. I don't like them. I don't like… seeing you like this, Mel." He sighed and shook his head. "Should I sing now?" he offered again.

This time, his croonings were in Cirronian. He doubted that Mel would mind. His whole attention was focused on the hand he was holding and on the words pouring out of his mouth, a Cirronian lullaby about tapping your potential to outshine the sun. He had often felt that his Mel outshone the sun, so it seemed appropriate. Except that now she was not shining brightly at all.

He broke off abruptly after several minutes, tears in his eyes, his shaking voice no longer able to maintain the tune. Gloved hands caressed her face and throat as their Cirronian owner sobbed like a bereft child. He repeated her name, over and over, trying to draw comfort from a word that had always lifted his spirits in the past.

"Mel. Mel, Mel, Mel, Mel, Mel," he murmured, over and over, shaking his head. "Come back to us, please. Please, we need you… Jess needs you. I need you."

He was a little surprised to feel a definite surge in her life-force on the heels of these words, as if a little encouragement was all she had needed.

"Yes," he breathed. "Come back to us, Mel. We need you."

Cole?

He blinked, sure that he had heard her voice in his mind. That was, of course, impossible. Few Cirronians could have accomplished such a thing. There was not way that a human had. His own hope was making him imagine things that were not there. Shaking it off, he focused on the shift he had felt earlier, and leaned closer to her, his mask touching her ear.

"We need you, Mel. Come back to us," he breathed, certain that he had not imagined this subtle change in her. Her life-force was a little more powerful than it had been just a few moments ago, he was sure. It was a tiny difference, almost imperceptible, but it was something.  "Mel, can you hear me?" he whispered, willing some response from her. No reaction, none at all. "Please," he groaned, shaking his head and stroking her throat exactly as he had their second day together, holding her in that field. 

He half-expected to hear her quiet voice, weak. You're crying…

Crying because he had cared. Even then, two days into their association, he had cared enough to weep for her, exactly as he was now. She had come to mean a great deal to him in just those few days. Since then, she had become an integral part of his life. She meant so much to him and he needed her so badly. It was not just the help she provided him, either, not even mostly that. It was the comfort and emotional support that she so unhesitatingly bestowed on him. And… no use in denying it to himself any longer, her love. Love pure and without conditions, for the first time in so long.

He felt so helpless, a condition that he had not experienced since Nallia and Ashi had been murdered. Even with Mel in that field, holding her still body in his arms, there had been the hope that his abilities could bring her back. When it had seemed that they would not, grief and not helplessness had replaced hope. Always in the past, in every situation he had ever encountered, there had been some course for him to take, some way to make things right, or at least to try. Here, now, there was nothing. Mel's fate was completely in the hands of others and all he could do was sit back and hope for the best.

"You come back to me," he whispered in a shaky voice. "You have to, okay? I need you… You are like… like the sun. You give me so much light and warmth." He closed his eyes and shook his head, struggling to compose himself. "I can sing some more," he offered. "Would you like me to sing some more now, Mel?" Nodding unsteadily to himself, he resumed his quiet Cirronian singing.

***

Jess was shaking like a leaf as she pulled on her gloves and mask. Visiting hours were nearly over and she had just left Isabel to get some sleep. Now it was time to take the plunge and try to see Mel again.

"You okay, Miss Hauser?" the nurse asked quietly.

Jess gave an unsteady nod. "Just… I want to see Mel now."

The nurse nodded. "This way." She led Jess to the room. "Your brother's still in there," she told Jess quietly outside. "I don't think he's left once since Detective Bruno went."

"I don't doubt it," Jess said quietly, giving the nurse a smile as she moved off.

Cole loved Mel so much, probably more than Mel, or even Cole himself, realized. He was completely devoted to her, and she had no doubt that he would not leave her side, even to sleep. After he had helped her last night, she fully intended to return the favor, talking him into getting some rest as well. He had to have needed it, because she knew that he had probably not slept at all the night before. Her shaking hand hovered over the door-knob for a long moment before she squared her shoulders, gritted her teeth, and turned the knob.

Nodding sharply to herself, she opened the door and slid inside. Cole was sitting next to Mel, holding her hand. His cheek was resting on the mattress near her face, his body perfectly still and his eyes closed. The only sign that he was awake was his gentle crooning. She was not sure exactly what he was saying or doing but it sounded a lot like his earlier praying. Not wanting to disturb him, she froze and tried not to make a sound. His eyes popped open immediately anyway.

"You see, Mel?" he whispered before rising and approaching the young Englishwoman. "Jess," he greeted her quietly. "How are you?"

"Figured it was time to come see Mel," she responded quietly, staring fixedly at the paper slippers covering her shoes.

"Look at me, Jess," Cole ordered gently, tenderly catching her chin in one hand and forcing her head up.

Jess stared into his eyes uncertainly. "Cole?"

"How are you?" he repeated more firmly.

"Bloody horrible, Cole," Jess admitted, her shoulders slumping.

She tried to look down only to find that he refused to release his gentle hold on her chin. She stared back into his eyes, relieved by the compassion and understanding that she saw there. Again, he refused to judge her or call her fear weakness. He understood. Shaking her head, she went wordlessly into his arms, her tiny frame trembling.

Cole closed his eyes and wrapped his arms tightly around her, providing her with what comfort and reassurance he could in the human way, holding her and crooning softly. After a moment, he moved one hand from her back to her throat, lightly caressing and transmitting calming energy.

"Jess, Mel will recover. She will be fine. You have to believe this," he told her quietly, still stroking her throat. "She is a strong woman, Jess. I have never known a fighter like her before."

Jess let her eyelids drift shut, soothed by Cole's tender touch. There was just something so completely calming about it. She could feel her anxiety slipping away, could sense the slowing of her hammering heartbeat. She was not sure what he was doing or how, but she was grateful all the same. Mel had been right about him, he was amazing. As with the previous day's good night sleep, he had sensed exactly what she needed and he was, somehow, giving it to her.

"Thank you, Cole," she murmured, grateful.

"Are you ready to see Mel now?" he offered.

"Will you stay?"

"If you would like."

"I'd appreciate it, Cole." Jess gave a grateful nod.

"Okay." He smiled and nodded faintly, slipping an arm around her shoulder and steering her to face Mel. "The nurses say we should talk to her," he suggested gently.

"Yeah, talk." Jess gave a faint nod and took the few steps to the bed.

"And if you keep your gloves on, you can touch her as well," Cole added. "And they say that we'll be able to take the gloves off very shortly. The antibiotics are working quite well."

"Good, that's good." Jess gave a shaky nod.

"It's okay, Jess. Everything is going to be fine," Cole promised.

Jess nodded and reached out slowly, hanging on to Cole's words as she hesitantly took one of Mel's hands into her own. "Hey, Mel," she greeted the woman she viewed as a sister, her voice hesitant and shaky. "Um… You get well soon, okay? I mean, otherwise who's going to keep me in line, eh?" She gave a nervous laugh and shook her head. "I have it on good authority that you're a fighter, Mel, and I'm inclined to agree. You going to let some bug bring you down?" Jess shook her head more firmly. There was absolutely no way that Mel would let that happen. "You are going to be just fine, Mel. I just know it."

She glanced up at Cole and saw him nod his approval of her words.

"Can we have a few minutes?" she asked Cole quietly.

"Of course you can, Jess." Cole nodded and gently squeezed her shoulder. "I'll be outside if you need anything at all."

"Thank you, Cole." Jess smiled gratefully as she watched him go, then turned her attention back to Mel. "So, um…"

She shifted uneasily, suddenly a lot less at her ease now that Cole had left her. Closing her eyes, she shook her head firmly. He had promised that Mel would be okay and she had to focus on that assurance. Cole may have had some odd and Forrest Gumpish mannerisms, but he was damned intelligent at bottom, and he had this way of knowing things. So if Cole said that Mel was going to get better… she was, simple as that.

"Mel," she began again, sitting down. "You do know that he's been in here with you almost every minute, don't you?" She smiled and shook her head. "He took the time to bring me home and… well, he forged a marriage certificate for the two of you… Long story." She chuckled and shook her head. "But other than that and giving me and Vic a little privacy with you, he's been here every minute. And I… I haven't, Mel, and I'm sorry. I probably wouldn't have come at all, either, except for Cole." She shook her head, aware that she was rambling. "I loved your grandmother, Mel. She was my best friend for a lot of years. She was the only family that I really had."

Jess shrugged, aware that, at some point after Irene's death, that had changed.

"You and Cole are my family now," she told Mel simply, shrugging. "I don't think I ever told you that, but… it's true." She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply. "Thing is, as much as I need you, I think Cole needs you more. You… you're one of those women like Irene. The kind who you can't know and not love." She smiled and shook her head. "So many people love you, Mel. We love you. Just… you bear that in mind, Mel, okay?"

"Miss Hauser?"

Jess looked up at the nurse. "Visiting hours over, are they?"

"Yes, I'm sorry." She nodded apologetically.

Jess nodded and rose slowly. "Thanks. Cole still out there?" At the nurse's nod, she nodded again and followed her from the room, shedding her gloves and mask and joining him in the waiting area. "Hey, Cole," she greeted him gently, sitting next to him.

"Hello, Jess." He smiled down at her and gave her throat an absent caress. "You feel much better now, don't you?" he asked, knowing the answer.

"Yeah, yeah I do, Cole." She nodded. "Your cue to say 'I told you so'."

He smiled gently and shook his head. "I will not say that, Jess. I am pleased that you are feeling better. Will you require another ride home tonight?" he offered.

"Actually, I was thinking that I could give you a ride home tonight, Cole," Jess replied quietly.

"You wish to tuck me in?" he asked with an innocent smile.

Jess, who had never actually heard Cole joke before, smiled faintly. Shaking her head, she answered, "No, but I don't want you collapsing from exhaustion either, Cole. You do need rest."

"I will not collapse, Jess," he promised simply, giving her a reassuring look. "I have gone without sleep for far longer than this in the past," he explained honestly. "You, however, should return home and get some rest. You can return in the morning."

Jess frowned and started to protest, but stopped at the firm look on his face. It was not a look that she had seen from the mild-mannered and typically accommodating man, but she could still read it quite clearly. He had reached a decision and there was not a thing that she could say to change his mind.

"You sure, Cole? Because Vic or I would be more than glad to spend a night with her, give you a break."

"I do not wish for a break, Jess."

Jess frowned and nodded. "Okay, Cole. You… take care. I'll see you bright and early tomorrow."

"Okay." Cole smiled and nodded, rising and hugging her. "Sleep well, Jess. Call me if you need anything."

"Yeah, Cole," she agreed, leaving the waiting area. She stopped at the nurse's station. "Hey, looks like my brother's going to be here all night again. You think you could get him a cot or something?" It was, at least, something.

"Of course, Miss Hauser."  The nurse nodded readily, a little surprised that no one had thought of it before. "We'll find one right away."

"Thank you." Jess smiled at her. "You have a good evening."

"You too, Miss Hauser." The nurse watched her go before rising and entering Mel's room. "Mister Hauser?"

"Yes, nurse?" Cole asked, looking up from his thoughtful examination of Mel. She was definitely stronger.

"We're going to try to find a cot to bring in for you, so you can get some rest."

Cole smiled faintly. "You've been talking to Jess," he told her, nodding. "It is not necessary, though."

"It's no problem, really." The nurse nodded faintly. "And I'll talk to the doctor about seeing when those gloves can come off." 

His smile widened. "Thank you. I don't like these gloves."

"No, of course you don't." The nurse nodded her understanding. "You have a good night, Mister Hauser."

"Thank you. You have a good night, too." Cole smiled at her as she left, then returned all of his attention to Mel. Her life-force was definitely stronger now than it had been before. She was, slowly but surely, on the mend. He could not have been happier. "Did you hear what the nurse said, Mel? I can take the gloves off, soon. I'm glad. I don't like the gloves. I want to touch your skin like I normally can. It feels different, better."  He tenderly caressed her throat.

"Jess came in to see you," he reported. "I knew she would. She's braver than she knows, like you. She was scared, but she came. And I know you're scared now, too, but I need you to come back to me." He stroked her throat as he spoke. "You're stronger, I can tell. And they say that the antibiotics are working, so it's time for you to come home now, Mel."

***

Why was she having such a hard time waking up? Mel wondered groggily, struggling to shake off the confusion and disorientation clouding her mind. This was well beyond being a little sleep-drunk. Her brain simply refused to work as it was supposed to. She felt hung over but could not recall having had anything to drink the night before. In fact, much of the night before was a complete blank. She remembered closing and going to bed, but… more had happened after that, she was sure. Just not sure what.

She pushed that aside for a moment, trying to figure out why she felt so horrible and weak. Clicks and beeps and a wheezing sound slowly filtered into her awareness as she fought against her murky half-consciousness. If she could just wake up, she knew, everything would become clear. Why did her throat hurt so badly? she wondered. It was by no means the only part of her that was in discomfort, she realized. There was other pain: in her head, her stomach, her arms, in other places that she did not even want to think about. Panic began to edge its way into her awareness, and she could feel tears making their way down her face. What had happened? Where was she and who was doing this to her? Zin? She swallowed, hoping to relieve some of the dryness in her throat, and hopefully some of that nagging pain at the same time. Trying to swallow told her exactly why that particular bit of her body was in pain.

There was something in her throat!

Horrified by the knowledge, her hands shot up and she struggled to pull the offending tube or whatever it was out of her mouth. Large, strong hands closed around hers, stilling them. Panic growing, she tried to fend off the hands, but was too weak to free her own from their grasp. Crying and whimpering in protest, she shook her head frantically.

"No, Mel. The doctors say you still need that for a little while," a gentle voice whispered, washing away fear. "You can take it out later."

"Cole?" she asked. Tried to ask. The tube made talking nearly impossible.

"It's okay, Mel. You're going to be okay," he promised, cautiously releasing her hands and caressing her throat. He smiled in approval when Mel did not try to pull the breathing-tube out again. The doctors had warned him that she might try to when she started to regain consciousness.

Mel opened her eyes and stared into his. He was crying. Weakly, she reached up and smoothed away his tears, her expression questioning.

"It's what happens when you care," he reminded her gently. Brushing a few stray curls out of her face, he explained, "I'm just happy that you're awake again."

Awake again? Mel regarded him in confusion, not sure what to make of his words until she began to take in her surroundings. Hospital, she was in a hospital… She certainly felt like she needed one. But why, what had happened? She supposed that she could figure that out later. The important thing was that Cole was there and did not seem dreadfully worried. Good sign. She watched as he leaned around her and hit the call-button, his free hand still caressing her face and throat.

Enjoying his touch, soothed by it, she looked around the room, frowning as she took in all the strange machines and monitors. This was not a normal hospital room. She was in the ICU! But why? She made an interrogative noise at Cole and he smiled reassuringly down at her.

"It's okay, Mel. You were very sick, but now you are getting better."

Very sick, but getting better. She had been worse? Wow… Mel nodded weakly and lifted her hands to his shoulders, pulling weakly. Cole looked a little confused by her actions, but let her pull him against her. When she wrapped her arms around his broad back and buried her face in his chest, he nodded his understanding and slipped his arms under her, pulling her body into his and smiling as he buried his face in her hair.

"Hey, look who's awake!" the nurse said with a smile from the door. "Bet you've never been quite so happy to hug your wife, huh, Mister Hauser."

Wife? Mel leaned away far enough to give Cole an incredulous look. Cole smiled at the nurse and ignored Mel's look.

"Very happy," he assured her. "I like hugging Mel."

"I'm sure you do. Think you could put her down for a few minutes so we can look her over?"

Cole nodded and gently returned Mel to her previous, prone position. "Mel, I need to call the others. They have all been worried as well. Will you be okay here alone for a few minutes?"

Mel nodded and watched him go, feeling strangely alone without him in the room. She caught the nurse's hand as she worked and gestured towards that horrible breathing-tube.

"We'll have to see what the doctor says about that one," she told Mel gently. "He's on his way."

Mel nodded and leaned back again, closing her eyes and letting the nurse work, still trying to figure out what she had missed.