Sammy: Hello, well this is going to be more along the lines of a humor chapter dedicated to my good ol' pal Erica … she wanted to laugh and therefore I have obligations to do so … Heida will enjoy this too and hopefully so will the rest of you … hey that rhymed, give me a dime!! *Gets dragged off* Or … maybe a quarter … nickel …?
~Chapter 16: Wasting Time~
The four people spun around to the direction from which the noise emerged. Right from the bathroom. What in the hell could be in the bathroom?
"What the fuck?" Zell yelped with a confused look on his face.
"Let's go check it out …" Rinoa took some steps towards the bathroom but was held back by Selphie.
"NO! Whatever you do don't! You don't know what's in there … first we need someone that is of no use to us to go check it out …" She turned her gaze to Squall.
"I ain't checking whatever the hell that is … and if you meant useless then you are talking about yourself …"
Rinoa rolled her eyes, "What's the worse it could be …"
"Janitors in the air duct fucking hard and then they fell through the opening right in your bathroom …" Zell put in. "Or worse they could both be men …"
Rinoa paused for a moment then looked at Zell disgusted, "You grew up with Squall didn't you?"
"Yah …" Zell said hesitatingly not really knowing where this was going.
"Thought so … you think alike …" Then she turned around and opened the bathroom door. A dramatic paused followed and Esthar could have heard Rinoa yell out:
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING THERE!?"
The other three adolescents rushed towards the doorway. There, butt first in the sink was Hikari, whimpering and whining about the pain.
"You brought her here?" Rinoa shrieked at Selphie.
"How could I have brought her here?! She wasn't with us in the car! I would have never brought her here!" She said defensively.
"How the hell did you get here?" She turned back to her sister. "Never mind how, LEAVE! You have no clue what could happen to you here!"
Hikari wasn't expecting this bad of a greeting, "You want me to leave? FINE!" She screamed, "Zell, drive me back home!"
Everyone turned to Zell, "What? Don't look at me! I haven't even MET her before, let alone let her in my car!"
"Hey if you're like me you'd let anyone female into your car …" Squall joked.
Rinoa just looked at him, you could tell she was pissed and Selphie just had this disgusted look on her face.
"It was a joke …" He tried putting in.
"You've hit a new low …" Rinoa rolled her eyes.
"Ugh … pedophile …" Selphie muttered.
"Hikari, what are you-" She didn't have time to finish her sentence when swung her fist at her face. She ducked out of the way and moved out of the door.
"What the hell is up your ass? Have you gotten rabies or something?" Rinoa shrieked shielding herself from a lowly 'Fire' spell.
Hikari's eyes started tearing, "I COME ALL THIS WAY AND YOU ASK ME WHAT I'M DOING??"
"It's not everyday you cross the country and find your 7 year old sister has managed to without you knowing!" Rinoa said rather calmly. "Calm down already …"
"I don't want to!" And with that, Hikari sent off a sleep spell and Rinoa sank into nothingness again but instead of hitting the floor she just fell onto a nearby bed.
The three other people who were still by the bathroom door watched in amazement.
"You think by the experience she'd have that she would have the decency to junction some sleep spells …" Squall said. "Well, a guy's gotta do what a guy's gotta to …" He started walking towards Rinoa.
Selphie grabbed him by the back of the t-shirt, "You aren't waking her! I'm not letting this happen twice!" With that she took an awakening out of her pocket and threw it underhand at Hikari who cached it. She wiped her eyes. Selphie looked at her oddly, she had never seen Rinoa or Hikari cry before and she couldn't help wondering why Hikari was crying now.
She slowly poured the contents of the tiny flask into her sister's mouth and walked off as the tonic took effect. When it did Rinoa sat upright on the bed.
"I wish people would stop doing that …" She said frustrated.
"Just junction sleep it'll never have to happen again … unless you want it to …" Squall said a small smile playing at his lips.
"Shut up …" She retorted.
"I had something really important to tell you and-" Hikari didn't even finish her sentence when she just broke out sobbing, "You … wouldn't … let …" And then she started crying some more.
Rinoa looked bewildered. Zell was slightly uncomfortable, Squall was amazed at such an outburst and Selphie … well, she just stood there.
"When was your last full night of sleep?" Rinoa asked.
Hikari managed to sputter out, "I … dun … dun … I dunno!" She resumed crying.
Rinoa sighed and went up to her sister, "You're cranky, you're going to bed." She picked her sister up and carried her to the other room, shutting the door behind her.
There was a slight silence among the three childhood friends and then Squall spoke up.
"I didn't know she was good with kids …"
"She isn't …" Selphie responded, "Last time Rinoa went babysitting it was nearly a murder case …"
"Then what the hell was that?" Squall hissed.
"It's her sister, so it's not the same thing …" Selphie shrugged.
" … Whatever …" Squall said.
Zell snickered, "Got the hots for her?" He teased.
Squall turned away and went to sit on the bed, turning on the T.V.. Selphie rolled her eyes and added, "Obviously so …"
"No …" Squall retorted.
"Un-huh …"
"Nuh-un …"
"Yunh-huh …"
"Nuh-un …"
"Yuh-"
"Fuck, stop!" Zell hissed, "What are you guys, five??"
"I'm 19 …"
Rinoa entered back into the room and said, "And obviously you can't tie your shoelaces …" She closed the door quietly behind her.
Squall looked down at his running shoes, the laces were tucked into the sides to keep him from tripping over them.
Selphie started to laugh hysterically and had to shove her face in the nearby pillow so not to make so mach noise.
"Well, Zell can't tie them too well either …" He pointed to Zell's feet. The laces were tied but it wouldn't have mattered, tied or untied. They were sloppy loops that had been an attempt at the "bunny ears" technique.
"Hey shut up man, I taught you how the reproductive system works …"
"Because you're a year older then me!" Squall hissed aggressively.
Rinoa started to laugh and joined Selphie in the wonderful wonders of laughing at men … who couldn't tie their shoelaces.
"Well, I'm 18 and I act more mature then the two of you put together!" Said Selphie who had recently recovered from her laughing fit.
"Oh right … YOU act mature … well butter my ass and call me bread …" Squall said sarcastically.
"That's probably all your worth bed-wise anyways …" Selphie retorted.
Rinoa started laughing even harder and Zell joined in.
"Oh give me a break!" Squall threw his arms up in defeat.
"I'm 20 and I've never been dissed so bad by a girl Squall!" Zell said between laughs.
Squall gave Zell the not-so-nice finger. "So how old are you Rinoa?" Rinoa had also recovered from her laughing fit.
"17 …"
"18 …" Selphie corrected. "In a week …"
Rinoa grimaced, now why the hell did Selphie had to go say that for.
"18!" Squall exclaimed.
"You'll be legal!" Zell smirked.
(AN: I AM CANADIAN AND PROUD TO BEEEE!)
Squall joined, "I'll take you out and buy you a beer!"
"Then we could go in casinos and spend gil!"
"Shit yah!" Squall agreed.
Neither Rinoa or Selphie seemed too keen on the idea.
"I honestly doubt we would enjoy watching you two get drunk off your asses …" Rinoa said coolly.
"Beer is good!" Zell said defensively. Then Squall broke into a song.
"What is the greater liquor, what gets you drunker quicker, what comes in bottles or in cans?"
Zell joined in as well, "BEER!"
"Can't get enough of that beer, gotta really love it, makes me think I'm a man!"
"Think!! Key word in there!" Selphie and Rinoa said in unison.
Then Zell continued for his downed companion, "I can kiss and hug it, but I'd rather chug it, fill my belly up to here!"
"I cannot refuse a beer, I could really use a-" Squall said.
"Beer, beer, beer, beer, beer, beer!" Zell sang.
Then Squall took up, "I can't remember how much I have had, I drank a 12 pack, with my dad!" He ended with a burp.
Zell imitated a deep manly drunken voice, "That's my son the drunken manly stud, I'm proud to be his bud!"
"Here have some pretzels!" Squall imitated a high pitched voice.
"No, I'll call it quits, those things give me the shlitz!" Zell answered gravely.
Then both the boys started together, "Drink with your family, drink it with your friends, drink till your fat, stomach distends! Beer is liquid bread it's good for you, we like to drink till we spew."
"Ew …" Mumbled Rinoa.
"Who cares if we get fat?" Zell asked.
"I'll drink to that! As we sing once more-" Squall tried singing the chorus again but was interrupted by Selphie.
"NO! Ok, enough …" She said aggravated.
"Wow, you two could make Broadway …" Rinoa said sarcastically.
"Seriously?" Zell asked hopefully.
"Uhm … no." She said.
Sammy: AAHAHAHAHAHAA!! You know that's an actual song. If you have Win MX or something try downloading Weid Al Yankovic The Beer Song. You'll laugh a lot! I don't own the song by the way … it is the property of … well … someone. The Yankovic guy I'm guessing. ANYWAYS. I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. PLEASE R&R!! TELL YOUR FRIENDS ABOUT THE FANFIC!!! MAKE THEM READ IT!! Ahahaha … kidding … but I would appreciate publicity …