Disclaimer: Again, not mine, don't sue.
~*~
"You want to borrow a *dress*?" Asked a very surprised Hermione Granger as she cocked an eyebrow at her friend. Ron was very red, and indeed, looked as though he was about to explode any second.
"Yesssss.." He said, desperately hoping she would not ask to much more into it, but of course, being Hermione, she did.
"Sure, but, why on earth do you want it?"
"Ihavetowearit." Ron mumbled. Hermione's eyebrow arched higher.
"You want to what?"
"Wear it! Just give me the bloody thing, will you???" Ron cried, sincerely displeased that he even had to reveal this much to Hermione. He had no clue how he would survive the rest of the night.
"Wear it? I know it's Halloween, but. . . A dress . . . Ron, is there anything going on I should know about?"
Yes!! Ron's mind screamed, but his mouth cried "No!!"
Hermione's brow furrowed slightly. "You sure?" She said softly.
"Yes, now just hand over that bloody dress! I have to know if it fits, otherwise I'll have to find another one, and dinner starts in an hour!!"
"Alright! Alright! Which one do you want? My blue one from last year?"
"I don't care."
"No, no, we can't put that on you. Not with red hair."
"I'll colour it! Just gimme a goddamned dress!"
"Here." She handed him the blue dress and Ron held it out in front of him, several things running through his mind. 1) He was not going to get through this alive, 2) Blue didn't go with his hair, 3) He had no clue how to get into the dress, and 4) Draco was going to laugh his ass off.
"I don't think this'll fit . . ." Ron said quietly, and Hermione shook her head and brought out her want.
"I can enlarge it a bit. Dominus Strensurus." She said, and the dress grew a few sizes larger. It now appeared that Ron would at least be able to get into it.
"Do you mind?" Ron said, and Hermione turned around with a roll of her eyes so that Ron could worm his way into the shiny blue fabric. "There, I'm done." He said grudgingly. Hermione turned, and nearly choked trying to hold back the laugh. He had it on backwards. She told him so.
"Shaddup." Ron said, glaring, and promptly turned the dress around.
"Um, Ron. We'll have to do something about that."
"About what?"
"Well. The front. It's. baggy. You don't exactly have. how do I put this? . . . The right 'figure' to wear that dress.
Ron went scarlet.
"Oh." He mumbled.
"Here, we can fix it." Hermione said, and ran up to her room, leaving Ron alone in the deserted common room in a dress. She came back down with a bra in her hands.
"HERMIONE!"
"Calm down! If you wear it underneath, we can stuff it. Here, put it on."
Ron looked at the bra, but didn't reach out for it. He then looked up at Hermione, his eyes narrowed suspiciously.
"You're actually *enjoying* this, aren't you?"
"Ron, stop being silly! Just put it on!"
Ron snatched the bra from her hands, and glared at Hermione until she turned around.
"You can look now."
Hermione turned again, and found Ron to be a particularly amusing sight. The dress was undone to the waist, and was hanging from it, whereas the bra was slightly crooked the way he wore it on his chest. Hermione couldn't help but start laughing.
"Come on, Hermione! Just help me!" Ron said, exasperated.
"Here, I'll turn something into Jello for you. It'll make them look more real."
"Hermione!!"
"What? You want fake looking ones?"
"That's not what I meant! I am NOT wearing a jell-filled bra!!"
"Fine! We can use napkins or towels or something then. I'll go get some." She ran upstairs, and came back with a few scraps of different materials, and Ron frantically tried to stuff them into the bra.
"It looks a little lopsided. . ." Hermione said worriedly.
"No one'll notice, and if anyone *does* notice, it means they've been looking at my chest, so I'll punch them anyway!"
Hermione laughed.
Ron zipped up the rest of the dress, and was pleased to see that at least it fit. However, the hair was going to be a problem.
"Well, I bet I could find a spell to transform my teddy bear into a wig. . ." Hermione volunteered.
"Alright." Ron said uneasily, and the two went to work on finding Ron a new head of hair.
~*~
When Ron finally made it down to dinner, he was the talk of the town. No matter where he walked, people burst into fits of giggles, and it was actually quite the demoralizing gesture.
His hair, now, was black, cut short at his shoulders, and due to some help in the make-up department from the other Gryffindor girls, his freckles were gone and he had the works: Eye liner, lipstick, eye shadow, blush and mascara. It was enough to make the once red-haired boy want to cry.
He had managed to avoid Harry, but had run into Fred and George on the way down, and had a feeling the twins would never let him live this down. Damn that Draco Malfoy!
However, he did end up running into Harry when he was forced to sit beside him at dinner.
"I'm sorry, but Ron sits - - RON!?!?!" Harry cried, finally seeing his friend as he sat down.
"Be quiet Harry. . ." Ron pleaded, and knew what was about to happen, just like it always did - - - Harry began to laugh. Hard.
"Harry! Stoppit!" Ron cried. He could not take this. Please, dear god, he prayed, Let me die now. . .
Harry tried to stifle his giggles, but it didn't really work, and instead he made a sort of snorting noise through his hand - which only depressed Ron further.
Dinner, Ron reflected, was not very fun. Simply because he knew that the entire great hall was staring at him. It did not help that when Ron turned around, he could openly see Snape giving him the oddest look, as if to say: 'I knew you were an idiot, but not to this extent'.
Ron wondered which would be less painful, jumping off a roof or stabbing one's self through the heart.
He hadn't seen Draco throughout the dinner, but just as he stood to take his leave, his eyes glanced over the table, and he nearly screamed in glee. For, instead of seeing a Harry look-a-like sitting between Crabbe and Goyle, he saw Draco Malfoy. The blonde, perfectly measured and ultimately evil Draco Malfoy.
Ron was cured.
T.B.C.
~*~
"You want to borrow a *dress*?" Asked a very surprised Hermione Granger as she cocked an eyebrow at her friend. Ron was very red, and indeed, looked as though he was about to explode any second.
"Yesssss.." He said, desperately hoping she would not ask to much more into it, but of course, being Hermione, she did.
"Sure, but, why on earth do you want it?"
"Ihavetowearit." Ron mumbled. Hermione's eyebrow arched higher.
"You want to what?"
"Wear it! Just give me the bloody thing, will you???" Ron cried, sincerely displeased that he even had to reveal this much to Hermione. He had no clue how he would survive the rest of the night.
"Wear it? I know it's Halloween, but. . . A dress . . . Ron, is there anything going on I should know about?"
Yes!! Ron's mind screamed, but his mouth cried "No!!"
Hermione's brow furrowed slightly. "You sure?" She said softly.
"Yes, now just hand over that bloody dress! I have to know if it fits, otherwise I'll have to find another one, and dinner starts in an hour!!"
"Alright! Alright! Which one do you want? My blue one from last year?"
"I don't care."
"No, no, we can't put that on you. Not with red hair."
"I'll colour it! Just gimme a goddamned dress!"
"Here." She handed him the blue dress and Ron held it out in front of him, several things running through his mind. 1) He was not going to get through this alive, 2) Blue didn't go with his hair, 3) He had no clue how to get into the dress, and 4) Draco was going to laugh his ass off.
"I don't think this'll fit . . ." Ron said quietly, and Hermione shook her head and brought out her want.
"I can enlarge it a bit. Dominus Strensurus." She said, and the dress grew a few sizes larger. It now appeared that Ron would at least be able to get into it.
"Do you mind?" Ron said, and Hermione turned around with a roll of her eyes so that Ron could worm his way into the shiny blue fabric. "There, I'm done." He said grudgingly. Hermione turned, and nearly choked trying to hold back the laugh. He had it on backwards. She told him so.
"Shaddup." Ron said, glaring, and promptly turned the dress around.
"Um, Ron. We'll have to do something about that."
"About what?"
"Well. The front. It's. baggy. You don't exactly have. how do I put this? . . . The right 'figure' to wear that dress.
Ron went scarlet.
"Oh." He mumbled.
"Here, we can fix it." Hermione said, and ran up to her room, leaving Ron alone in the deserted common room in a dress. She came back down with a bra in her hands.
"HERMIONE!"
"Calm down! If you wear it underneath, we can stuff it. Here, put it on."
Ron looked at the bra, but didn't reach out for it. He then looked up at Hermione, his eyes narrowed suspiciously.
"You're actually *enjoying* this, aren't you?"
"Ron, stop being silly! Just put it on!"
Ron snatched the bra from her hands, and glared at Hermione until she turned around.
"You can look now."
Hermione turned again, and found Ron to be a particularly amusing sight. The dress was undone to the waist, and was hanging from it, whereas the bra was slightly crooked the way he wore it on his chest. Hermione couldn't help but start laughing.
"Come on, Hermione! Just help me!" Ron said, exasperated.
"Here, I'll turn something into Jello for you. It'll make them look more real."
"Hermione!!"
"What? You want fake looking ones?"
"That's not what I meant! I am NOT wearing a jell-filled bra!!"
"Fine! We can use napkins or towels or something then. I'll go get some." She ran upstairs, and came back with a few scraps of different materials, and Ron frantically tried to stuff them into the bra.
"It looks a little lopsided. . ." Hermione said worriedly.
"No one'll notice, and if anyone *does* notice, it means they've been looking at my chest, so I'll punch them anyway!"
Hermione laughed.
Ron zipped up the rest of the dress, and was pleased to see that at least it fit. However, the hair was going to be a problem.
"Well, I bet I could find a spell to transform my teddy bear into a wig. . ." Hermione volunteered.
"Alright." Ron said uneasily, and the two went to work on finding Ron a new head of hair.
~*~
When Ron finally made it down to dinner, he was the talk of the town. No matter where he walked, people burst into fits of giggles, and it was actually quite the demoralizing gesture.
His hair, now, was black, cut short at his shoulders, and due to some help in the make-up department from the other Gryffindor girls, his freckles were gone and he had the works: Eye liner, lipstick, eye shadow, blush and mascara. It was enough to make the once red-haired boy want to cry.
He had managed to avoid Harry, but had run into Fred and George on the way down, and had a feeling the twins would never let him live this down. Damn that Draco Malfoy!
However, he did end up running into Harry when he was forced to sit beside him at dinner.
"I'm sorry, but Ron sits - - RON!?!?!" Harry cried, finally seeing his friend as he sat down.
"Be quiet Harry. . ." Ron pleaded, and knew what was about to happen, just like it always did - - - Harry began to laugh. Hard.
"Harry! Stoppit!" Ron cried. He could not take this. Please, dear god, he prayed, Let me die now. . .
Harry tried to stifle his giggles, but it didn't really work, and instead he made a sort of snorting noise through his hand - which only depressed Ron further.
Dinner, Ron reflected, was not very fun. Simply because he knew that the entire great hall was staring at him. It did not help that when Ron turned around, he could openly see Snape giving him the oddest look, as if to say: 'I knew you were an idiot, but not to this extent'.
Ron wondered which would be less painful, jumping off a roof or stabbing one's self through the heart.
He hadn't seen Draco throughout the dinner, but just as he stood to take his leave, his eyes glanced over the table, and he nearly screamed in glee. For, instead of seeing a Harry look-a-like sitting between Crabbe and Goyle, he saw Draco Malfoy. The blonde, perfectly measured and ultimately evil Draco Malfoy.
Ron was cured.
T.B.C.