Note: I don't own anything that has any doing with Lord of the Rings,
books, movie...This is more based on the movie than the book but it has
some bits from it... Enjoy the diary.
~Entry No.6- A place with these big white rock things by Misty Mountains Dear Diary, It took so LONG to get here, we're resting now and everybody else is doing something so they won't notice me writing in a diary. I'm currently standing on a rock keeping a look out for Gwaihir but I'm supposed to look out for evil stuff...oh well, I have good elven senses, I'll notice something sooner or later. I hope brother dearest sent Gwaihir coz I haven't gotten anything yet...Aragorn is watching Boromir, Merry and Pippin swordfight with each other while Sam and Frodo are making food...Gimli (that old git) is smoking a pipe and Gandalf is sitting on a rock. YAY...Gwairhir has come...brother dearest has sent a note!!! Sister dearest, I'm on a cliff looking over some very nice scenery. I miss you, do you miss me? I might change my mind and stay somewhere near Mirkwood maybe, but the orcs seem to be too close. It's too bad you'll miss out on all the fighting. I'm guessing you're not having much fun at the moment. Don't worry, you'll be killing orcs soon. They're everywhere nowadays, since Saruman has taken over Isengard and Orthanc and it's now an evil place. Anyway, expecting a reply soon. Your brother dearest, Legolas I miss him so much. I'm just gonna scribble a reply now... -Five minutes later... I just sent Gwaihir back with my note and I kept my bro's in my lovely diary. It's so different without him... I think I sense something ...SEE...my elven senses ARE working...I should stop here.
~Entry No.7- West-Gate to Moria (Stupid dwarf...that old git) Dear Diary, It's been awhile since I last wrote. I'm standing in front of the West-Gate to Moria and Gandalf is trying to figure out the "riddle". Anyway, lotsa stuff happened. After I got the note from Legolas, a cloud of black crows started to appear in the sky, I saw them and knew what they were (I am so smart! I am so smart! S-M-R-T! I mean S-M-A-R-T!) they were spy crows (crebain) from the other bastard Saruman. I said they were "Crebain, from Dunland!" using my best Legolas voice. That was probably the first time I actually spoke to everyone since this so called "journey". Gimli (that stupid dwarf) thought it was a "whiff of clouds"...gee...how dumb can one get? We all hid and the birdies came down and flew away again. Gandalf decided that we had to go through Caradhras. It was a pretty tough hike up there. THEY ALL SMELL WORSE COZ THEY'RE WORKING OUT MORE...*Shudders* ...We hiked on the snow and I can tell you it was pretty damn COLD. Of course, I had to act like Legolas in every way and pretend not to feel anything...that was tough man! Then Frodo tripped and fell and "dropped" the ring that was hanging on a necklace. Boromir (weirdo) picked it up and acted all freaky. We had to wait for them to settle everything, I was pretty damn BORED...*muttering* Frodo shoulda put on the necklace properly... We got a move on and we reached the Pass of Caradhras. It was even more freakin' cold than before because there was the wind and the snow and the ice and wind and it was all mixed and stuff and yeah...I of course being the only Elf, could walk on top of the snow and the ice and snow and the yeah...IT WAS THE BESTEST TO BE THE ONLY ONE THAT COULD WALK ON TOP OF ALL THE SNOW!!! THATS ANOTHER COOL THING ABOUT BEING AN ELF!!! HEE HEE HEE!!! *SIGH* Anyway, I looked out and heard Saruman's (that bastard) voice. Then all of this snow came down on us and I saved Gandalf from it! Aren't I a good Elf? AND I was the first to pop out of the snow! HEE HEE HEE!!! They stalled again and this time it was to decide whether to go on through the pass or go underground through Moria. BORING. I didn't really want to go through Moria, Gimli was talking about it SO much...and I don't favour caves and stuff. But since I "am" Legolas, I gotta act tough and stuff like him...talk like him, walk like him, kill like him, run like him...*SIGH* brother dearest... ...Now (as I mentioned before) we're in front of the West-Gate leading to Moria, well, they are. I'm standing here writing and it's all dark and the lake next to us is black. BORING. Gandalf is trying to solve the "riddle" on the gate, which is in Elvish which "I" can read...*muttering* he coulda asked me to solve it for him... We're waiting and we've been waiting for a long time now. I swear I dozed for like a minute or two earlier... Sam let Bill go since Aragorn said "...the mines are no place for a pony, even one so brave as Bill..." poor Bill had to find his own way home, Sam was pretty sad. Then Merry, threw a stone into the lake (is it me or is everyone here an IDIOT?!), stupid males...they STINK, they're IDIOTIC and did I mention they STINK? As I said, Merry threw a stone into the lake which would've probably disturbed some kinda monster that lives down there...
~Entry No.8- In Moria...(4 day trek) dark and creepy and there's lotsa dead stuff all over the place... Dear Diary, We are made it inside Moria and are now in front of three doorways. Gandalf is deciding which to go through right now. We had a little "incident" when we first came in. Gimli started blabbering away about his relatives, and how they were going to be so friendly and that we were going to enjoy the "fabled hospitality". He thought that "I" was his "friend", like hell I am!
...When we did go in for the first time, there was dead stuff all over the place, "I" of course being the smart elf I am, knew they were killed by goblins and I readied my brother's bow (it felt so COOL!). Suddenly there was like this water monster thing (SEE I knew there was something in that lake) called the "Watcher in the Water" and it grabbed Frodo by the legs and we all tried to kill it. But I killed it! (Well technically the walls came down on it) AND I USED my brother's BOW!!! HEE HEE HEE!!! I feel so happy. *GIANT GRIN*... Frodo at least put on the ring necklace properly this time...wouldn't it be just the bestest if it was dropped into that pitch-black lake where the "Watcher" lives? It would do us all the favour of GETTING IT BACK. We all ran inside after killing that thing and we had no choice but to walk on. ...Now we're in front of three doorways and Gandalf is STILL trying to decide which one we should go through. That creep Gollum is following us...stupid Mirkwood gaurds...can't even gaurd the creep properly, and they blamed it on US...*muttering*...Now HE'S the stupid tag-along... So far, none of the "Fellowship" has noticed anything strange about me...except maybe Boromir, he kept on eyeing me strangely ever since we left Rivendell... He's a freakin' freaky weirdo. I think he smokes too. Aragorn is smoking right now... *SHUDDERS* I DISLIKE the smell of pipe weed...I REALLY would like to know how brother dearest can stand being around these kinda people. Speaking of brother dearest...it's gonna be harder to get notes from him now that we're inside a mine...egh...Gollum is getting closer...I'm gonna stop writing now...I think Gandalf's figured something out.
~Entry No.9- Have made it out of the mines and are currently in Lothlorien... Dear Diary, Currently in Lothlorien sitting by myself on a tree. A lot of things have happened and I didn't have time to write about them. Brother was right, a lot of events WOULD and DID occur, I have a feeling that was just the beginning. *SIGH* A LOT of things to tell so here we go... Once Gandalf had "followed his nose" and made the decision to go through one of the doorways, we entered this HUGE hall with a whole bunch of TALL pillars. It was HUGE, it was called...erm...what was it again..."The Dwarf city of Dwarrowdelf" I think, anyway, I actually thought it was pretty COOL, I mean, it made us look incredibly SMALL. Gimli went into a little room with Balin's tomb in the middle (his cousin). He started to sob and I think I actually felt a BIT sorry for the little guy...even with all the ANNOYING talking and stuff... Anyway, I started to feel a bit queesy about the place and decided to open my mouth to the closest person around, unfortunately...it was Aragorn. I told him "We must move on. We cannot linger" and he agreed. I felt so...mature saying that! I can do the best Legolas impressions ever! Pippin, that curious idiot, decided to "touch" a skeleton that was sitting on the well and made the entire thing fall through it with a really LOUD BANGING noise that could be heard through the ENTIRE mine. I mean, that was really stupid. Gandalf got pissed and said "Fool of a took! Throw yourself in next time and rid us of your stupidity!" I was like, yeah, totally, at least one of us agrees that SOME people aren't that bright. I'm guessing that "noise" roused up a whole lotta orcs, coz we heard drum beatings. Frodo's sword Sting glowed blue (blue is such a nice colour isn't it? My eyes are blue!). I readied my bro's bow and it felt so cool again! I shot an arrow through a crack in the door and it killed one o' the orcs! HEEHEEHEE!!! I finally get to kill orcs now!!! A cave troll crashed in and everyone like...started to fight and it was all CRAZY! I mean it! I saw Sam hit an orc with a frying pan! O_O I quickly ran onto a ledge on the other side and killed orcs with my bro's ELVEN BLADES!!! That was like...SWEET!!! The disgusting troll noticed me and decided to TRY and kill ME! An ELF! HAH! I avoided getting hit by his chain coz I was like, superfast and then, he swung the chain and it wrapped around a pillar, I stomped my foot on the chain to make sure it was secure and ran over to jump on the troll's (really gross) head so that I could shoot down through his skull. (I could hear the little *crack* of the skull!!! HEEHEEHEE!!!)He started to ROAR in pain and I jumped off without a single scratch on me! (I'm so happy with myself!). I went and killed some more orcs when suddenly, I saw Frodo, with a spear sticking out of him...I reacted and decided to kill that bastard of a troll once and for all. I went in front of him aiming directly at his mouth. I shot an arrow through his mouth and into his brain. That killed him! I can't believe he even had a brain for me to shoot through... Anyway, Frodo turned out to be alright, he was wearing "Mithril". I wanted one... We all then hurried out the doors and we entered the hall again, we had to go and cross the bridge of Khazad-dum to get the hell outta this place. When, just by our luck, we get chased by orcs coming from I don't know where and we get surrounded. I got a closer look at these orcs and I noticed that they have stapled noses...I mean, I don't have time to look at them when I kill 'em. I just kill 'em. So anyway, there's this bright fiery light shining through the pillars and it was coming closer. The orcs had already scattered away and I knew if they were scared, we should be too...I was thinkin' RUN YOU FREAKIN' IDIOTS RUN!!! (of course I was addressing the Fellowship) but I didn't run myself coz I was just...too freaked. I was pretty sure that whatever it was, Elves like me didn't particularly stand up to these kinda things, we were actually pretty afraid of this. It was a freakin' BALROG. In my childhood, my parents used to freak the hell outta my bro and me by telling us these really scary stories about Balrogs. *Shudder*... So we FINALLY start running and Boromir runs ahead of us, there were supposed to be stairs there but they got cut off pretty short and Boromir nearly fell if it wasn't for ME. My quick reflexes were pretty sharp so I just held on to Boromir (he stunk like HELL, I mean, I was holding on to him and he SMELLED). Anyway, it was something my brother would've done. We all continued on running down another staircase until we stopped at a gap. (Stupid dwarves, can't make long-lasting, good quality stairs...) So I, with my reflexes, jump over first and I called on Gandalf to jump over so I could catch him (I seem to be catching and saving a lot of lives nowadays...), I caught him and he didn't smell any better than Boromir. Orcs started shooting at us with arrows and they had the WORSE aim EVER! I shot an arrow at them and I know it hit one of them right in the forehead. I returned fire as Merry, Pippin and Sam got tossed over by Aragorn. Gimli however, didn't want to be tossed by Aragorn. He jumped over but didn't make it completely so I had to yet again save another life but this time, I grabbed his beard while thinking *Ugh, stupid little git, can't even jump over, he owes me big time for saving his pudgy little dwarf butt*. Aragorn and Frodo were left on the other side and it started to crumble and wobble back and forth. They were stuck. So Aragorn got the idea to lean forward (WOW finally, a SMART idea!), and they jumped over before the stairs crumbled. We reached the bridge and crossed over. Gandalf stayed in the middle of the bridge to face the Balrog. He started shouting at the thing and managed to defend himself and break the Balrog's sword against his, "Glamdring". He yells "You shall not pass!" and breaks the bridge with his staff. That made the Balrog fall down into the "chasm". We all thought that was the end of the beast but it wasn't. Gandalf, should've ran over right away but he didn't. The whip of the Balrog snatched Gandalf's leg and made him hang on for dear life. Frodo wanted to run over but Boromir stopped him. Gandalf didn't make it... We all ran out of the mines and into the Misty Mountains again where everyone just fell apart. Gimli wanted to go back but Boromir stopped him too. The hobbits were all crying and I had to look away. I wanted to cry too, I had a hard time keeping it in, I wanted my brother with me. I missed him. Then Aragorn told me to "get them up". You know, I REALLY have to ask brother dearest how he handles all of this. I mean, he hangs around with these people who stink, Aragorn orders him around...and now he ordered me to do something...I can't believe this... I helped them up and we started to head for the woods of Lothlorien. As we came to the edge of the forest, I swear I could feel the presence of the Lady Galadriel. I hope she doesn't realize that I'm not Legolas... -We've been here for awhile now and so far she doesn't suspect anything, neither does Celeborn or Haldir...hehe, Haldir. He doesn't like staying around me...hehehe. So anyway, Gimli started talking again, this time about Galadriel and how she's all powerful and stuff and he claimed that he had "the eyes of a hawk and the ears of a fox" I'm thinking...*YEAH RIGHT! HAH!* and I WAS right coz an arrow was aimed right in front of his face. I of course had already had my bro's bow readied and pointed it at Haldir. Yes, it was Haldir and his "group". I despise Haldir. Brother does too but not as much as me. So we're still somewhat at the edge of the forest and Haldir requests that we have to be blindfolded, for "safety reasons". I mean HELLO, I'm an ELF! I am one of their kin, I shouldn't have to be blindfolded! It's not like I'm gonna memorize the way to get in there, I'm not gonna come back anytime soon...but they made me anyway and I couldn't complain coz my brother just isn't the complaining type and I gotta act like him... SO now I am on this very tall tree looking over everything writing in my little diary. WOW, that was a pretty LONG entry... Hey...I think I see Gwairhir coming!
~Entry No.10- *SIGH* STILL in Lothlorien... Dear Diary, That night we entered Lothlorien was pretty...sad. They had a lament for Gandalf and I had to dress all nice and stuff. I think wearing my brother's clothing is better than wearing my girly stuff. Brother's apparel is simple, comfortable, and it can also be pretty fashionable too. Anyway, I'm leaning on a tree near the water, writing...did I tell you I got another note from brother dearest?... Sister dearest, I miss you. I know it sounds odd but I miss your whining, complaining and annoyance. I'm alone, leaning against a tree writing this note. I wish I could be there. MY journey isn't very exciting as I thought it would be. So how is YOUR jouney coming along? I've heard one of the Fellowship has fallen from Gwaihir. Please, tell me, how it happened to be so. Has anyone suspected that you aren't me? I hope not. Anyway, expecting a DETAILED note soon, since you last one wasn't that specific. Your brother dearest, Legolas. I really should write a more detailed note to him. I can finally ask him how he handles being with these...these MALES. How's this note for a start... Brother dearest, I miss you too. I miss having you to annoy. Pretending to be you is really HARD you know. So far noone has suspected anything. Not even Galadriel (EEK! Did I speak too soon about that? Hope not...). Anyway, yeah, someone HAS fallen. It's Gandalf. He was a pretty good leader I gotta admit. I tried not to cry. I also have something VERY important to ask you. HOW THE HELL DO YOU HANG AROUND WITH THESE...THESE...MALES!!! I CAN'T STAND THEM ANYMORE, THEY'RE IDIOTIC, THEY STINK LIKE HELL, THEY ACT SO BUFF, JEEZ....I MEAN REALLY, YOU NEVER NOTICE THE STENCH OF...THESE MALES?! That is my question, answer it please and I really hope to see you again. Your sister dearest. That's basically my letter to Legolas. *SIGH* It's pretty boring here in Lothlorien, I mean, Galadriel never seems happy, she's always moody... maybe because she's still a little touchy about what I did to her...but I'm 'Legolas' so she doesn't know it's me, but I'll tell you what happened...hehehe... *FLASHBACK* Back when we were younger Elves, Galadriel wanted her hair crimped so I decided to crimp it for her... "Are you sure you can do this? I was planning to go to the salon..." "Well, if I do it for you won't have to pay" "Alright then..." she looked a bit hesitant but gave in. I started to crimp parts of her hair and it went well so far, it started to take awhile so I decided to get something to read. I had one hand with her hair, the other with a book. I started to get into the book and didn't really pay attention to her hair, when we both smelled something burning, I looked at her hair and it started to produce smoke. She was reading a magazine and didn't notice anything until I started to freak. "What?! What's wrong?!" she said alarmed. "Um..nothing! Everything's fine..." "Why do I smell smoke?" "Um...I think Haldir is playing with the matches again.." I started to panic so I dumped a bucket of water on her head (that apparently appeared right there). "WHAT WAS THAT FOR??!!" she yelled. "Um...your...hair...started to burn..." "HOW?!" "..From..the hair iron...I-I...didn't pay attention..." I looked at her hair and parts of it were sizzled, it look really funny, I tried not to laugh. She quickly rushed to the nearest mirror and screamed. "WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO MY HAIR??!!" she was furious. I kept my head down trying not to laugh. She stomped off and I tried to apologize but she wouldn't hear it. The next day she cut her hair and from the long back- length hair, it ended up short and barely touching her shoulders. She hasn't talked to me since. So I went back to Mirkwood and remained with my other friends. Actually, it was more like being exiled from Lorien and sent back to Mirkwood... *FLASHBACK ENDS* Good thing she doesn't know I'm not Legolas eh? Otherwise I'd be in deep trouble, this is the first time she's talked to me, although it's not to exactly ME she talking to, it's still me she's talking to. She's talked to my brother after the incident and he admitted it was funny as well but she didn't get mad at him as much as me.
~Entry No.11- FINALLY OUTTA HERE! We're out of Lothlorien and on the river Anduin on these boats the Elves of Lorien gave us. Before we left Galadriel gave each of us a gift, for 'Legolas' she gave a beautiful Elven bow and a nice supply of arrows, so I gave my old brother's bow to Aragorn. I know my brother would like this one much better. I hope Gimli doesn't notice I'm writing in a diary behind him, he hasn't turned around to look at me or talk and everybody else is ahead, maybe I should write later and start paddling again, otherwise Gimli's gonna notice I'm not paddling.
~Entry No.6- A place with these big white rock things by Misty Mountains Dear Diary, It took so LONG to get here, we're resting now and everybody else is doing something so they won't notice me writing in a diary. I'm currently standing on a rock keeping a look out for Gwaihir but I'm supposed to look out for evil stuff...oh well, I have good elven senses, I'll notice something sooner or later. I hope brother dearest sent Gwaihir coz I haven't gotten anything yet...Aragorn is watching Boromir, Merry and Pippin swordfight with each other while Sam and Frodo are making food...Gimli (that old git) is smoking a pipe and Gandalf is sitting on a rock. YAY...Gwairhir has come...brother dearest has sent a note!!! Sister dearest, I'm on a cliff looking over some very nice scenery. I miss you, do you miss me? I might change my mind and stay somewhere near Mirkwood maybe, but the orcs seem to be too close. It's too bad you'll miss out on all the fighting. I'm guessing you're not having much fun at the moment. Don't worry, you'll be killing orcs soon. They're everywhere nowadays, since Saruman has taken over Isengard and Orthanc and it's now an evil place. Anyway, expecting a reply soon. Your brother dearest, Legolas I miss him so much. I'm just gonna scribble a reply now... -Five minutes later... I just sent Gwaihir back with my note and I kept my bro's in my lovely diary. It's so different without him... I think I sense something ...SEE...my elven senses ARE working...I should stop here.
~Entry No.7- West-Gate to Moria (Stupid dwarf...that old git) Dear Diary, It's been awhile since I last wrote. I'm standing in front of the West-Gate to Moria and Gandalf is trying to figure out the "riddle". Anyway, lotsa stuff happened. After I got the note from Legolas, a cloud of black crows started to appear in the sky, I saw them and knew what they were (I am so smart! I am so smart! S-M-R-T! I mean S-M-A-R-T!) they were spy crows (crebain) from the other bastard Saruman. I said they were "Crebain, from Dunland!" using my best Legolas voice. That was probably the first time I actually spoke to everyone since this so called "journey". Gimli (that stupid dwarf) thought it was a "whiff of clouds"...gee...how dumb can one get? We all hid and the birdies came down and flew away again. Gandalf decided that we had to go through Caradhras. It was a pretty tough hike up there. THEY ALL SMELL WORSE COZ THEY'RE WORKING OUT MORE...*Shudders* ...We hiked on the snow and I can tell you it was pretty damn COLD. Of course, I had to act like Legolas in every way and pretend not to feel anything...that was tough man! Then Frodo tripped and fell and "dropped" the ring that was hanging on a necklace. Boromir (weirdo) picked it up and acted all freaky. We had to wait for them to settle everything, I was pretty damn BORED...*muttering* Frodo shoulda put on the necklace properly... We got a move on and we reached the Pass of Caradhras. It was even more freakin' cold than before because there was the wind and the snow and the ice and wind and it was all mixed and stuff and yeah...I of course being the only Elf, could walk on top of the snow and the ice and snow and the yeah...IT WAS THE BESTEST TO BE THE ONLY ONE THAT COULD WALK ON TOP OF ALL THE SNOW!!! THATS ANOTHER COOL THING ABOUT BEING AN ELF!!! HEE HEE HEE!!! *SIGH* Anyway, I looked out and heard Saruman's (that bastard) voice. Then all of this snow came down on us and I saved Gandalf from it! Aren't I a good Elf? AND I was the first to pop out of the snow! HEE HEE HEE!!! They stalled again and this time it was to decide whether to go on through the pass or go underground through Moria. BORING. I didn't really want to go through Moria, Gimli was talking about it SO much...and I don't favour caves and stuff. But since I "am" Legolas, I gotta act tough and stuff like him...talk like him, walk like him, kill like him, run like him...*SIGH* brother dearest... ...Now (as I mentioned before) we're in front of the West-Gate leading to Moria, well, they are. I'm standing here writing and it's all dark and the lake next to us is black. BORING. Gandalf is trying to solve the "riddle" on the gate, which is in Elvish which "I" can read...*muttering* he coulda asked me to solve it for him... We're waiting and we've been waiting for a long time now. I swear I dozed for like a minute or two earlier... Sam let Bill go since Aragorn said "...the mines are no place for a pony, even one so brave as Bill..." poor Bill had to find his own way home, Sam was pretty sad. Then Merry, threw a stone into the lake (is it me or is everyone here an IDIOT?!), stupid males...they STINK, they're IDIOTIC and did I mention they STINK? As I said, Merry threw a stone into the lake which would've probably disturbed some kinda monster that lives down there...
~Entry No.8- In Moria...(4 day trek) dark and creepy and there's lotsa dead stuff all over the place... Dear Diary, We are made it inside Moria and are now in front of three doorways. Gandalf is deciding which to go through right now. We had a little "incident" when we first came in. Gimli started blabbering away about his relatives, and how they were going to be so friendly and that we were going to enjoy the "fabled hospitality". He thought that "I" was his "friend", like hell I am!
...When we did go in for the first time, there was dead stuff all over the place, "I" of course being the smart elf I am, knew they were killed by goblins and I readied my brother's bow (it felt so COOL!). Suddenly there was like this water monster thing (SEE I knew there was something in that lake) called the "Watcher in the Water" and it grabbed Frodo by the legs and we all tried to kill it. But I killed it! (Well technically the walls came down on it) AND I USED my brother's BOW!!! HEE HEE HEE!!! I feel so happy. *GIANT GRIN*... Frodo at least put on the ring necklace properly this time...wouldn't it be just the bestest if it was dropped into that pitch-black lake where the "Watcher" lives? It would do us all the favour of GETTING IT BACK. We all ran inside after killing that thing and we had no choice but to walk on. ...Now we're in front of three doorways and Gandalf is STILL trying to decide which one we should go through. That creep Gollum is following us...stupid Mirkwood gaurds...can't even gaurd the creep properly, and they blamed it on US...*muttering*...Now HE'S the stupid tag-along... So far, none of the "Fellowship" has noticed anything strange about me...except maybe Boromir, he kept on eyeing me strangely ever since we left Rivendell... He's a freakin' freaky weirdo. I think he smokes too. Aragorn is smoking right now... *SHUDDERS* I DISLIKE the smell of pipe weed...I REALLY would like to know how brother dearest can stand being around these kinda people. Speaking of brother dearest...it's gonna be harder to get notes from him now that we're inside a mine...egh...Gollum is getting closer...I'm gonna stop writing now...I think Gandalf's figured something out.
~Entry No.9- Have made it out of the mines and are currently in Lothlorien... Dear Diary, Currently in Lothlorien sitting by myself on a tree. A lot of things have happened and I didn't have time to write about them. Brother was right, a lot of events WOULD and DID occur, I have a feeling that was just the beginning. *SIGH* A LOT of things to tell so here we go... Once Gandalf had "followed his nose" and made the decision to go through one of the doorways, we entered this HUGE hall with a whole bunch of TALL pillars. It was HUGE, it was called...erm...what was it again..."The Dwarf city of Dwarrowdelf" I think, anyway, I actually thought it was pretty COOL, I mean, it made us look incredibly SMALL. Gimli went into a little room with Balin's tomb in the middle (his cousin). He started to sob and I think I actually felt a BIT sorry for the little guy...even with all the ANNOYING talking and stuff... Anyway, I started to feel a bit queesy about the place and decided to open my mouth to the closest person around, unfortunately...it was Aragorn. I told him "We must move on. We cannot linger" and he agreed. I felt so...mature saying that! I can do the best Legolas impressions ever! Pippin, that curious idiot, decided to "touch" a skeleton that was sitting on the well and made the entire thing fall through it with a really LOUD BANGING noise that could be heard through the ENTIRE mine. I mean, that was really stupid. Gandalf got pissed and said "Fool of a took! Throw yourself in next time and rid us of your stupidity!" I was like, yeah, totally, at least one of us agrees that SOME people aren't that bright. I'm guessing that "noise" roused up a whole lotta orcs, coz we heard drum beatings. Frodo's sword Sting glowed blue (blue is such a nice colour isn't it? My eyes are blue!). I readied my bro's bow and it felt so cool again! I shot an arrow through a crack in the door and it killed one o' the orcs! HEEHEEHEE!!! I finally get to kill orcs now!!! A cave troll crashed in and everyone like...started to fight and it was all CRAZY! I mean it! I saw Sam hit an orc with a frying pan! O_O I quickly ran onto a ledge on the other side and killed orcs with my bro's ELVEN BLADES!!! That was like...SWEET!!! The disgusting troll noticed me and decided to TRY and kill ME! An ELF! HAH! I avoided getting hit by his chain coz I was like, superfast and then, he swung the chain and it wrapped around a pillar, I stomped my foot on the chain to make sure it was secure and ran over to jump on the troll's (really gross) head so that I could shoot down through his skull. (I could hear the little *crack* of the skull!!! HEEHEEHEE!!!)He started to ROAR in pain and I jumped off without a single scratch on me! (I'm so happy with myself!). I went and killed some more orcs when suddenly, I saw Frodo, with a spear sticking out of him...I reacted and decided to kill that bastard of a troll once and for all. I went in front of him aiming directly at his mouth. I shot an arrow through his mouth and into his brain. That killed him! I can't believe he even had a brain for me to shoot through... Anyway, Frodo turned out to be alright, he was wearing "Mithril". I wanted one... We all then hurried out the doors and we entered the hall again, we had to go and cross the bridge of Khazad-dum to get the hell outta this place. When, just by our luck, we get chased by orcs coming from I don't know where and we get surrounded. I got a closer look at these orcs and I noticed that they have stapled noses...I mean, I don't have time to look at them when I kill 'em. I just kill 'em. So anyway, there's this bright fiery light shining through the pillars and it was coming closer. The orcs had already scattered away and I knew if they were scared, we should be too...I was thinkin' RUN YOU FREAKIN' IDIOTS RUN!!! (of course I was addressing the Fellowship) but I didn't run myself coz I was just...too freaked. I was pretty sure that whatever it was, Elves like me didn't particularly stand up to these kinda things, we were actually pretty afraid of this. It was a freakin' BALROG. In my childhood, my parents used to freak the hell outta my bro and me by telling us these really scary stories about Balrogs. *Shudder*... So we FINALLY start running and Boromir runs ahead of us, there were supposed to be stairs there but they got cut off pretty short and Boromir nearly fell if it wasn't for ME. My quick reflexes were pretty sharp so I just held on to Boromir (he stunk like HELL, I mean, I was holding on to him and he SMELLED). Anyway, it was something my brother would've done. We all continued on running down another staircase until we stopped at a gap. (Stupid dwarves, can't make long-lasting, good quality stairs...) So I, with my reflexes, jump over first and I called on Gandalf to jump over so I could catch him (I seem to be catching and saving a lot of lives nowadays...), I caught him and he didn't smell any better than Boromir. Orcs started shooting at us with arrows and they had the WORSE aim EVER! I shot an arrow at them and I know it hit one of them right in the forehead. I returned fire as Merry, Pippin and Sam got tossed over by Aragorn. Gimli however, didn't want to be tossed by Aragorn. He jumped over but didn't make it completely so I had to yet again save another life but this time, I grabbed his beard while thinking *Ugh, stupid little git, can't even jump over, he owes me big time for saving his pudgy little dwarf butt*. Aragorn and Frodo were left on the other side and it started to crumble and wobble back and forth. They were stuck. So Aragorn got the idea to lean forward (WOW finally, a SMART idea!), and they jumped over before the stairs crumbled. We reached the bridge and crossed over. Gandalf stayed in the middle of the bridge to face the Balrog. He started shouting at the thing and managed to defend himself and break the Balrog's sword against his, "Glamdring". He yells "You shall not pass!" and breaks the bridge with his staff. That made the Balrog fall down into the "chasm". We all thought that was the end of the beast but it wasn't. Gandalf, should've ran over right away but he didn't. The whip of the Balrog snatched Gandalf's leg and made him hang on for dear life. Frodo wanted to run over but Boromir stopped him. Gandalf didn't make it... We all ran out of the mines and into the Misty Mountains again where everyone just fell apart. Gimli wanted to go back but Boromir stopped him too. The hobbits were all crying and I had to look away. I wanted to cry too, I had a hard time keeping it in, I wanted my brother with me. I missed him. Then Aragorn told me to "get them up". You know, I REALLY have to ask brother dearest how he handles all of this. I mean, he hangs around with these people who stink, Aragorn orders him around...and now he ordered me to do something...I can't believe this... I helped them up and we started to head for the woods of Lothlorien. As we came to the edge of the forest, I swear I could feel the presence of the Lady Galadriel. I hope she doesn't realize that I'm not Legolas... -We've been here for awhile now and so far she doesn't suspect anything, neither does Celeborn or Haldir...hehe, Haldir. He doesn't like staying around me...hehehe. So anyway, Gimli started talking again, this time about Galadriel and how she's all powerful and stuff and he claimed that he had "the eyes of a hawk and the ears of a fox" I'm thinking...*YEAH RIGHT! HAH!* and I WAS right coz an arrow was aimed right in front of his face. I of course had already had my bro's bow readied and pointed it at Haldir. Yes, it was Haldir and his "group". I despise Haldir. Brother does too but not as much as me. So we're still somewhat at the edge of the forest and Haldir requests that we have to be blindfolded, for "safety reasons". I mean HELLO, I'm an ELF! I am one of their kin, I shouldn't have to be blindfolded! It's not like I'm gonna memorize the way to get in there, I'm not gonna come back anytime soon...but they made me anyway and I couldn't complain coz my brother just isn't the complaining type and I gotta act like him... SO now I am on this very tall tree looking over everything writing in my little diary. WOW, that was a pretty LONG entry... Hey...I think I see Gwairhir coming!
~Entry No.10- *SIGH* STILL in Lothlorien... Dear Diary, That night we entered Lothlorien was pretty...sad. They had a lament for Gandalf and I had to dress all nice and stuff. I think wearing my brother's clothing is better than wearing my girly stuff. Brother's apparel is simple, comfortable, and it can also be pretty fashionable too. Anyway, I'm leaning on a tree near the water, writing...did I tell you I got another note from brother dearest?... Sister dearest, I miss you. I know it sounds odd but I miss your whining, complaining and annoyance. I'm alone, leaning against a tree writing this note. I wish I could be there. MY journey isn't very exciting as I thought it would be. So how is YOUR jouney coming along? I've heard one of the Fellowship has fallen from Gwaihir. Please, tell me, how it happened to be so. Has anyone suspected that you aren't me? I hope not. Anyway, expecting a DETAILED note soon, since you last one wasn't that specific. Your brother dearest, Legolas. I really should write a more detailed note to him. I can finally ask him how he handles being with these...these MALES. How's this note for a start... Brother dearest, I miss you too. I miss having you to annoy. Pretending to be you is really HARD you know. So far noone has suspected anything. Not even Galadriel (EEK! Did I speak too soon about that? Hope not...). Anyway, yeah, someone HAS fallen. It's Gandalf. He was a pretty good leader I gotta admit. I tried not to cry. I also have something VERY important to ask you. HOW THE HELL DO YOU HANG AROUND WITH THESE...THESE...MALES!!! I CAN'T STAND THEM ANYMORE, THEY'RE IDIOTIC, THEY STINK LIKE HELL, THEY ACT SO BUFF, JEEZ....I MEAN REALLY, YOU NEVER NOTICE THE STENCH OF...THESE MALES?! That is my question, answer it please and I really hope to see you again. Your sister dearest. That's basically my letter to Legolas. *SIGH* It's pretty boring here in Lothlorien, I mean, Galadriel never seems happy, she's always moody... maybe because she's still a little touchy about what I did to her...but I'm 'Legolas' so she doesn't know it's me, but I'll tell you what happened...hehehe... *FLASHBACK* Back when we were younger Elves, Galadriel wanted her hair crimped so I decided to crimp it for her... "Are you sure you can do this? I was planning to go to the salon..." "Well, if I do it for you won't have to pay" "Alright then..." she looked a bit hesitant but gave in. I started to crimp parts of her hair and it went well so far, it started to take awhile so I decided to get something to read. I had one hand with her hair, the other with a book. I started to get into the book and didn't really pay attention to her hair, when we both smelled something burning, I looked at her hair and it started to produce smoke. She was reading a magazine and didn't notice anything until I started to freak. "What?! What's wrong?!" she said alarmed. "Um..nothing! Everything's fine..." "Why do I smell smoke?" "Um...I think Haldir is playing with the matches again.." I started to panic so I dumped a bucket of water on her head (that apparently appeared right there). "WHAT WAS THAT FOR??!!" she yelled. "Um...your...hair...started to burn..." "HOW?!" "..From..the hair iron...I-I...didn't pay attention..." I looked at her hair and parts of it were sizzled, it look really funny, I tried not to laugh. She quickly rushed to the nearest mirror and screamed. "WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO MY HAIR??!!" she was furious. I kept my head down trying not to laugh. She stomped off and I tried to apologize but she wouldn't hear it. The next day she cut her hair and from the long back- length hair, it ended up short and barely touching her shoulders. She hasn't talked to me since. So I went back to Mirkwood and remained with my other friends. Actually, it was more like being exiled from Lorien and sent back to Mirkwood... *FLASHBACK ENDS* Good thing she doesn't know I'm not Legolas eh? Otherwise I'd be in deep trouble, this is the first time she's talked to me, although it's not to exactly ME she talking to, it's still me she's talking to. She's talked to my brother after the incident and he admitted it was funny as well but she didn't get mad at him as much as me.
~Entry No.11- FINALLY OUTTA HERE! We're out of Lothlorien and on the river Anduin on these boats the Elves of Lorien gave us. Before we left Galadriel gave each of us a gift, for 'Legolas' she gave a beautiful Elven bow and a nice supply of arrows, so I gave my old brother's bow to Aragorn. I know my brother would like this one much better. I hope Gimli doesn't notice I'm writing in a diary behind him, he hasn't turned around to look at me or talk and everybody else is ahead, maybe I should write later and start paddling again, otherwise Gimli's gonna notice I'm not paddling.