Author's Notes: Hiya! I'm going to write the um...? What chapter? Oh yeah the 5th one! I really hope you guys are enjoying the reading thing! I'm trying really hard to think up of funny things but if this one is not as funny as the others well you know... let me know!
Toothaches, Weight problem, and Hives Oh my!
Chapter 5, Kagome's Boyfriend???
By deadkitty
The dog-demon ran around the whole entire house of the scientist. The 2 very angry girls were giving him a chase but somehow lost interest after he went up on the roof. They all went in the house but Inuyasha stayed a foot far away from them in case they change their mind and deicide to kill him again.
"I'm so, so, so, very sorry!" Kagome kept apologizing, "I really am!"
"Don't worry about it, I have insurance. Well my family does. I'll just tell them that some big ugly dinosaur made a hole through the basement!" L. E. said though still looking like she's ready to cry.
"Feh! What's a dinesor?" asked Inuyasha.
Kagome glared at her guy, "YOU ARE!"
"You don't have to yell," he said holding the cap on his head.
"Really, Kagome, It's okay. Anyway..." she put her mouth close to her ear, "He is your boyfriend, right?"
She blushed really hard and whispered a hard, "No!" but her friend didn't believe it.
"Anyway the cure is Pepsi so you better get some 'cause that guy over there spilled my last one," she said.
"Okay," Kagome grabbed Inuyasha's hand and dragged him to the door, "Bye! See ya after the holiday!"
L. E. watched the 2 go and thought, 'Well no matter how mean he is I just hope he doesn't hurt Kagome's heart... though,' she looked at the hole in the basement, 'he is SO not coming back to my house... EVER!!!'
While they were running, she tripped and fell. They guy looked down upon her then bended down to her eye level. She was holding her poor ankle again. He glared at her but it looked like he was glaring at himself.
"Dam*! Why'd you have to fall down?! We have to go and save them you know!" he complained.
She glared at what she thought was her friend and said sarcastically, "Well sorry for living!"
He picked her up and put her on his back and started running then said, "Comfortable?"
"Inuyasha! NO! Put me down! Stop! Are you CRAZY?!" she cried.
He looked at her confused, "I thought you were hurt? You can't expect me to let you walk on that!" he pointed at her swollen ankle.
"Hello! Middle of daylight! If people saw you carrying me on... why explain I'll just ride on my bike okay!" Kagome picked her bike up and got on it very carefully.
"Fine! Be a stubborn, bi%ch! Like I care!" he walked slowly with her pace.
They walked in silence. Not saying one word to one another. "Where are we going?" Okay, so they aren't quiet any more.
"Where else? To buy Pepsi! We're going to the store," she said informatively.
"....." he stared hard on the ground and started some kicking rocks on the way. Kagome also said nothing but winced every time she pedaled on her bike.
Okay this is getting uncomfortable. Let go back to Kaede! I bet she's doing something interesting now!
"Kiara... I think we have finally lost them..." the old lady whispered.
"What is it you are doing, sister?" said a mysterious voice.
"AH!" screamed Kaede.
"Shhh!"
"Oh, sister Kikyo! We are hiding from Inuyasha's friends,"
"So, has Naraku made them act like this?"
"Very likely,"
"Really?"
"Yes..."
"Are you sure it is for true?"
"Well not really..."
"Then you really have no idea who is the person that has cursed your friends?"
"Well...no but as a priestess I know it's Naraku!"
"Well… it could be me. I could have put that curse on your friends."
"If you did then you wouldn't be here right know, you'd be trying to get Inuyasha for yourself and have gotten Kagome cursed too,"
"Ah! That is very clever."
Kiara looked at the 2 arguing priestesses then lay down near a tree and went into her slumber.
Okay very boring! Let's look at the addicted lunatics!
"They went that way!" cried the fox-boy.
"No, Kiara carried old lady Kaede through there at the woods!" said Sango.
"You are both wrong! Their heading for that hill at the other side of the village!" shouted Miroku.
"NO!" they all shouted!
They then looked at each other then.., "Rock, Paper, Scissors, shoo!"
"Ha! Paper beats rock!" said the monk.
"Yeah but scisors beat paper!" said the exterminator.
"Wha! I got paper too!" cried Shippou.
"HOLD IT! How can paper beat rock! I just don't get that!" pouted Miroku
"You're just being a sore loser!" she said hold out an L.
"Am not!"
"Am too!"
"Am not!"
"Am too!"
"Am not!"
"Whhhhaaaaaaaaah! I lost!" cried the poor kitsune.
People are busy these days; well I guess Kagome and Inuyasha must be doing something other than this! The 2 companions headed for the store and were in an aisle. Eyes kept staring at the poor hanyou. Kagome looked embarrassed to be seen with the guy. He was sniffing around almost everything. The cans of food, the meat at the food section, someone's purse, a kid's lollypop, a guy's butt! Nah, just kidding, it was under a girl's skirt!
"Inuyasha! Would you stop it! You're embarrassing me! Ahh!" yelled Kagome.
Inuyasha was licking the lollypop the kid was eating, "Mmm, you know these are better than your cooking, Kagome."
"Why! You give me that!" she snatched the candy away from the guy and gave it back to the poor baby who was crying, "Here you go, I'm very sorry. He's new in town you see and…"
"Stay away from my baby!" shouted the mother.
Kagome flinched at the words. She bowed down and kept muttering apologies, "Sorry, Very sorry! It won't happen again."
"Feh! What's your problem?" said the hanyou.
"My problem?! MY PROBLEM! OOHHH!" there was a background of fire behind her.
"Uh oh," Inuyasha knew what was coming and he braced himself but was saved by something unexpected.
"Kagome?" asked 3 innocent voices.
She turned around to see 3 girls hugging her, "AH! Kagome I knew it was you? What are you doing here in the store? You should be in the mall shopping! Who is that guy? Is he that obnoxious boyfriend you were telling us about? He looks kinda cute. What are you doing with him? Are you sure you should be walking around in broad daylight? You might get sick again!"
Kagome sighed she knew she wouldn't get to answer all those questions or get to complain so she just waited for them to stop talking, "Guys I'm here 'cause I'm showing my uh… cousin! Yeah cousin… around town…"
"Cousin?" the 3 girls pulled Kagome into their circle and started whispering.
"Common' Kagome!" said friend #1 (sorry do not know names…)
"Are we suppose to believe something like that?" asked friend #2.
"Yeah! What they said!" said the confused friend #3.
"Guys! You don't have to get so uptight about it!" Kagome said nervously.
"Uptight! Just look at him standing there… suppose he robs banks too huh?" said #2.
"NO! You guys got it all wrong he's from America and he's new and all and…"
"But he's cute thought… if he is your cousin hook me up with him!" cried #1.
"No you don't girl, that white boy is mine!" cried some ghetto girl.
"Who are you?" cried the 4 white girls, "Hey, author how she'd get in the story?"
(Oops… sorry, just wanted to add some spice… sorry, never happen again.)
"Kagome are we going to find the Pepsi or what?!" cried the ignored dog-demon.
"Sorry guys I have business to work with! I'll see ya in school if I don't fall horribly sick again!" and she went to another aisle.
"Ya think he a cousin?" asked #3.
"Nah! Look at Kagome stand up to the guy so protectively," said #2.
"Yeah he must be her boyfriend or my name is…. Oh look a gummy bear," smiled #1.
The 3 girls looked at each other than walked away from the store shrugging, "Hey are we guys?"
The ghetto girl looked at the gummy bear than snatched it from the ground. "It's mine ya hear! MINE!" Evil laughter echoed from the store. All eyes turned her way and she stopped laughing. She then ran out of the store.
"Oh here it is!" said Kagome and took the 6-canned Pepsi off the shelf.
"Give it to me! The faster we get there the sooner they'll be cured!" He took the Pepsi off her hands and ran to the door. The beeping things near the doors went nuts. Security guards came out of nowhere and started chasing after the guy.
"Told you to keep an eye on the guy," said a policeman.
"Hey I didn't know just because he looked like a criminal doesn't mean he is!" said the other one.
"Shut up and keep running!"
"INUYASHA!" shouted Kagome, "That stupid guy! You just don't run away! You have to pay for it!"
Inuyasha was in the parking lot by now and couldn't hear Kagome's words over the shouting people with badges. He jumped on one of the cars and it was a Sequoia. "What do you want you ba$tards!"
Guns were held into position and one of the top cops started to speak, "Put the Pepsi down and no one gets hurt! Also put your hands in the air where we can see them!"
Kagome ran in between the guards and Inuyasha, "Stop please! I'll pay for the Pepsi!" She started rummaging through her purse.
A cop took her by the hand and said, "Miss, this is not your business. I suggest you let us professionals handle the situation."
The angry dog-demon saw the guy take her hand, "DON'T YOU TOUCH KAGOME!"
The cops all fired their guns at the hanyou. The bullets head towards him. He heard the Kagome's voice scream. The hanyou just smile and did… the Matrix??? He dodged all the bullets easily in midair. The cops stared at him astonished and confused. Kagome quickly took this opportunity to escape.
"Common' Inuyasha," and the both ran off through the streets.
"Yo! Chief! How'd that guy do that?" asked 1 officer.
"It musta've been some shooting of a movie here or something," said the chief reasonably, "Yeah and he gotta have strings to hang on to do that… yeah!"
The other policemen just shook their heads then asked, "Should we go after them, chief?"
"No! We're late for another appointment," they all nodded their heads and went in the cars. They were headed for… where else? The donut shop!
"God your so stupid!" muttered Kagome as the were running for their house.
"What are you talking about?!" shouted the ½ demon.
"Never mind… just…ow," she fell again.
"Oh let me guess, your ankle right? Fine, I'll get your carriage your highness," he said sarcastically and went to get her bike.
She glared at the boy go. 'Stupid ankle, stupid Pepsi, stupid policemen, stupid friends, stupid Inuyasha! How'd I get myself into these things?!'
"Yo! Your bike? We going or what?" he said impatiently.
"Yeah sure," and was off headed for the well.
"Hey… why did your friends say I was your boyfriend? What is a boyfriend?" asked the guy.
"Oh," blushed Kagome, "Well it's simple really. A boyfriend is a friend of a girl that is a boy. That's why I call my girl friends, girlfriends. Got it?"
"That's it? Then why did those girls make a big deal out of it?" asked the guy interestedly.
She shrugged, 'Hope that lie will stand for a bit…'
"So, it means that guy, Hobo?"
"It's Hojo!"
"Right Hojo or whatever is your boyfriend too?"
"Well um…"
"And how about Kouga is he your boyfriend too?"
"You know there is a difference…"
"There's also Miroku? How about him?"
"AAAHHH! Shut up!"
"WHAT DID I SAY?!"
"Shut up already, okay!"
"Wish I could be your only boyfriend…"
"What did you say?"
"Look out!"
"AHH!" Kagome crashed into a tree. (George, George, George of the Jungle watch out for that tree!)
Meanwhile let's check the bad guy's hangout place. There was a dark aura leaking around the place. Different scents filled your nose. Each was horrible then the next. Dead skeletons lay on the ground lifelessly staring at you with dark pools of emptiness. Makes you think we should have stayed with Kagome, huh?
"Checkmate!" said Naraku.
Kagura glared but just set up the pieces again, "You cheated…"
"Oh, you just noticed, huh?" sneered the wicked one, "Kanna! Come here!"
The pale girl with her mirror showed into the spooky place.
"That's a good girl. Show me what my minions are doing!" he said.
The mirror showed Sango, Miroku, and Shippou destroying villages and eating desserts out of people's houses.
"BWHAHAHA!" laughed the evil one. His laughter kept going and it kept going louder and louder and louder and CRASH!
Down at the bottom of Kanna's feet lay pieces of the mirror. Her eyes don't seem empty anymore.
"What did you do, Naraku?!" shouted Kagura.
"Hehehe! It's just a cheap mirror anyway," smiled Naraku. His smile was wiped of his face when tiny hands circled around his neck and started choking him.
"Broke… mirror… not… cheap!" cried Kanna.
Kagura smiled and started rooting for her sister, "That's it Kanna! Aim for the neck! Yeah! Oooh! Get the eyes! Yeah that it! Oooh! That is going to hurt in the morning! Go for the…go for.. oh…"
Naraku lay there unmoving from the floor. The 2 girls looked at each other.
"Wanna go gamble?" asked Kagura.
Kanna nodded her head. She took the pieces of the mirror and put it in her pocket.
"Hello? Anyone? Please! It's my time of the month! I'm turning human! Ahhh! I'm splitting!" yelled Naraku.
Sibling rivalry? Is there a Las Vegas in Japan? Will Inuyasha and Kagome finally get back to the well or will it take another chapter? I don't know. I'm just writing stuff I don't know what will happen. Maybe you do?