Harry walked down the corridor to the Great Hall, conscious of stares
from other students. Hermione took his hand and the two of them, with Ron,
kept their heads up and didn't look at anyone else.
"Students! It is wonderful to have you back for another year, in the best health, as I know that some were not so fortunate this summer-"
Harry's mind wandered aimlessly, until the doors to the Great Hall opened. Students gasped as Sirius Black stepped in. "What's he doing here?"
Hermione asked. Harry shrugged. "Ah yes, we would also like to introduce our new Divination teacher, Sirius Black." Dumbledore went on to explain about the clearing of Sirius' name to the few who had not yet heard about it.
"Divination?" Ron said, wrinkling his nose.
"What happened to Trelawney?" Dean asked.
"Beats me," Harry shrugged. "But Sirius has to be better than her."
"I'm not to sure if I feel comfortable with this." Lavender said airily.
'What? You don't feel comfortable with him being an accused murderer, or with him not favouring you because Bigglesworth died?" Seamus asked.
"His name was Binky," Lavender sniffed. "And I don't like the way he looked at me."
"Oh yeah, definitely. He was undressing you with his eyes Lavender. Take a long look at his hands when we do palmistry, you know what they say about the size of a man's hands, you might have quite the catch there-"
"Shut up!" Lavender cut Seamus off, throwing a roll at his head. He grabbed it and tore into it with his teeth, staring at Lavender all the while. Her eyes grew wide and she reached across the table and slapped him across the face. Ron almost choked from laughing.
"Do you think it's safe to have him here?" Hermione asked in low tones.
Harry shrugged. "Dubladore's prob'ly got 'is reasons."
"That is disgusting Harry. Don't talk with your mouth full. What would your mother say?"
"You're exactly right." Harry pulled his slobbery roll out of his mouth. "As I was saying-"
"Harry! That is repulsive!"
"I try."
"You don't suppose Sirius is here to protect you?" Hermione asked, after a final, disgusted look at Harry.
"Wow Hermione, I never would have thought of THAT. Where'd you come up with it?" Ron asked sarcastically.
Hermione sneered at him, and then turned back to Harry. "Well?"
"Oh probably. It's not as though Sirius has any interest in Divination." It was true, because at the same time, a different conversation was happening at the Head Table.
"I'll swap you jobs Remus." Sirius said hopefully.
"No way."
"What about you Flitwick? Reckon you'd like a change of pace?"
"Not on your life young Sirius."
"Hey! Professor McGonagall! You like Divination-"
"I can still have you out of this school in a heartbeat Black, I wouldn't push my luck if I were you." McGonagall said calmly.
"I would ask you Severus, but the dungeons probably smell like you, and I'm allergic."
"Allergic to the dungeons?"
"No, allergic to you." Sirius laughed, ducking to hide from Snape's glare.
After dinner Harry took Hermione's hand and they walked back to Gryffindor Tower. "So do you think Sirius is here for any reason other than to protect you?" She asked when they sat down.
Harry shrugged. "If he is he's wasting his time, because you're the one I need." He pushed her hair back and sang softly in her ear. She giggled and blushed, pushing him away.
Across the common room Ron grimaced his distaste. Dean frowned too. "Potter and Granger. Jesus."
Seamus, however, was grinning. "Come on Thomas, pay up. Eighteen galleons, none of that paper garbage you Muggles call money."
Dean glared at Seamus but handed him the money. "You bet on this?" Ron asked incredulously.
"Sure. Dean here put fifty galleons on Neville and Granger. I, of course, bet on the right people."
"I can't believe you bet on a relationship! Can't you-"
"I also put ten galleons, fourteen sickles on you and Parvati."
"Really?" Ron said, brightening.
Seamus shook his head, grinning.
~*~
Harry and Ron walked up to the Divination tower, wondering aloud about Sirius' first lesson.
They sat down at a table with Seamus and Dean and waited for Sirius to come in. He entered the room a few minutes later, his face twisted into a grimace of distaste. "Divination isn't real. Do whatever you want for the next hour."
There was stunned silence for a moment, then just as everyone was getting ready to cheer Parvati Patil shoved her hand into the air. "Professor Black! You can't just not teach us! This is a class, and I believe in Divination."
"Oh good lord." Sirius muttered. "Alright, get out Unfogging the Future and turn it to freelance prediction."
"Professor! We aren't ready for that." Lavender said.
"If you want to do Divination you'll do what I tell you to." Sirius said pleasantly, then in a more threating voice, "Turn it to freelance prediction."
They turned to freelance prediction.
"Read the chapter and then make a list of ten predictions. If any of the predictions come true you pass this class. If none of the predictions come true you fail this class."
"Professor! That's completely unfair!" Parvati screeched.
"I predict a large round ZERO on your page Miss Patil." Parvati gave him a look but shut up.
Harry and Ron finished scrawling down their predictions and went over to Sirius' desk. "What are you doing here?" Harry asked.
"I'm helping fugitive slaves escape from the Americas." Sirius said sarcastically. "What does it look like?"
"I mean, like what are you doing?"
"I'm not here to protect you Harry, or to get into your hair or check your dinner for poison. I'm here because I needed a job."
"What happened to Trelawney?" Ron asked.
Sirius shrugged. "I think she went to Beaubatons. It's mistier there or something."
Harry and Ron exchanged a look. "So why did you come here? Why didn't you get a job somewhere else?"
"Somewhere better." Ron interjected.
"There's really no place better than Hogwarts. You'll realise that ten minutes after you graduate. If you'll excuse me, I'm going to have a nap."
Harry and Ron looked at each other and shrugged. As students began to finish their assignment they turned to Sirius who showed no intention of giving them any more work. "Professor, with all due respect, is this all we'll do every class?"
"You can chart your predictions, create a probability graph on the likelihood of their coming true and hand a new one in with new predictions every week."
"What? Professor that's insane!"
"Well then, what's the problem? Hand in your predictions at the end of the class. I'll use them for kindling."
"Students! It is wonderful to have you back for another year, in the best health, as I know that some were not so fortunate this summer-"
Harry's mind wandered aimlessly, until the doors to the Great Hall opened. Students gasped as Sirius Black stepped in. "What's he doing here?"
Hermione asked. Harry shrugged. "Ah yes, we would also like to introduce our new Divination teacher, Sirius Black." Dumbledore went on to explain about the clearing of Sirius' name to the few who had not yet heard about it.
"Divination?" Ron said, wrinkling his nose.
"What happened to Trelawney?" Dean asked.
"Beats me," Harry shrugged. "But Sirius has to be better than her."
"I'm not to sure if I feel comfortable with this." Lavender said airily.
'What? You don't feel comfortable with him being an accused murderer, or with him not favouring you because Bigglesworth died?" Seamus asked.
"His name was Binky," Lavender sniffed. "And I don't like the way he looked at me."
"Oh yeah, definitely. He was undressing you with his eyes Lavender. Take a long look at his hands when we do palmistry, you know what they say about the size of a man's hands, you might have quite the catch there-"
"Shut up!" Lavender cut Seamus off, throwing a roll at his head. He grabbed it and tore into it with his teeth, staring at Lavender all the while. Her eyes grew wide and she reached across the table and slapped him across the face. Ron almost choked from laughing.
"Do you think it's safe to have him here?" Hermione asked in low tones.
Harry shrugged. "Dubladore's prob'ly got 'is reasons."
"That is disgusting Harry. Don't talk with your mouth full. What would your mother say?"
"You're exactly right." Harry pulled his slobbery roll out of his mouth. "As I was saying-"
"Harry! That is repulsive!"
"I try."
"You don't suppose Sirius is here to protect you?" Hermione asked, after a final, disgusted look at Harry.
"Wow Hermione, I never would have thought of THAT. Where'd you come up with it?" Ron asked sarcastically.
Hermione sneered at him, and then turned back to Harry. "Well?"
"Oh probably. It's not as though Sirius has any interest in Divination." It was true, because at the same time, a different conversation was happening at the Head Table.
"I'll swap you jobs Remus." Sirius said hopefully.
"No way."
"What about you Flitwick? Reckon you'd like a change of pace?"
"Not on your life young Sirius."
"Hey! Professor McGonagall! You like Divination-"
"I can still have you out of this school in a heartbeat Black, I wouldn't push my luck if I were you." McGonagall said calmly.
"I would ask you Severus, but the dungeons probably smell like you, and I'm allergic."
"Allergic to the dungeons?"
"No, allergic to you." Sirius laughed, ducking to hide from Snape's glare.
After dinner Harry took Hermione's hand and they walked back to Gryffindor Tower. "So do you think Sirius is here for any reason other than to protect you?" She asked when they sat down.
Harry shrugged. "If he is he's wasting his time, because you're the one I need." He pushed her hair back and sang softly in her ear. She giggled and blushed, pushing him away.
Across the common room Ron grimaced his distaste. Dean frowned too. "Potter and Granger. Jesus."
Seamus, however, was grinning. "Come on Thomas, pay up. Eighteen galleons, none of that paper garbage you Muggles call money."
Dean glared at Seamus but handed him the money. "You bet on this?" Ron asked incredulously.
"Sure. Dean here put fifty galleons on Neville and Granger. I, of course, bet on the right people."
"I can't believe you bet on a relationship! Can't you-"
"I also put ten galleons, fourteen sickles on you and Parvati."
"Really?" Ron said, brightening.
Seamus shook his head, grinning.
~*~
Harry and Ron walked up to the Divination tower, wondering aloud about Sirius' first lesson.
They sat down at a table with Seamus and Dean and waited for Sirius to come in. He entered the room a few minutes later, his face twisted into a grimace of distaste. "Divination isn't real. Do whatever you want for the next hour."
There was stunned silence for a moment, then just as everyone was getting ready to cheer Parvati Patil shoved her hand into the air. "Professor Black! You can't just not teach us! This is a class, and I believe in Divination."
"Oh good lord." Sirius muttered. "Alright, get out Unfogging the Future and turn it to freelance prediction."
"Professor! We aren't ready for that." Lavender said.
"If you want to do Divination you'll do what I tell you to." Sirius said pleasantly, then in a more threating voice, "Turn it to freelance prediction."
They turned to freelance prediction.
"Read the chapter and then make a list of ten predictions. If any of the predictions come true you pass this class. If none of the predictions come true you fail this class."
"Professor! That's completely unfair!" Parvati screeched.
"I predict a large round ZERO on your page Miss Patil." Parvati gave him a look but shut up.
Harry and Ron finished scrawling down their predictions and went over to Sirius' desk. "What are you doing here?" Harry asked.
"I'm helping fugitive slaves escape from the Americas." Sirius said sarcastically. "What does it look like?"
"I mean, like what are you doing?"
"I'm not here to protect you Harry, or to get into your hair or check your dinner for poison. I'm here because I needed a job."
"What happened to Trelawney?" Ron asked.
Sirius shrugged. "I think she went to Beaubatons. It's mistier there or something."
Harry and Ron exchanged a look. "So why did you come here? Why didn't you get a job somewhere else?"
"Somewhere better." Ron interjected.
"There's really no place better than Hogwarts. You'll realise that ten minutes after you graduate. If you'll excuse me, I'm going to have a nap."
Harry and Ron looked at each other and shrugged. As students began to finish their assignment they turned to Sirius who showed no intention of giving them any more work. "Professor, with all due respect, is this all we'll do every class?"
"You can chart your predictions, create a probability graph on the likelihood of their coming true and hand a new one in with new predictions every week."
"What? Professor that's insane!"
"Well then, what's the problem? Hand in your predictions at the end of the class. I'll use them for kindling."