Notes:
TheRealXenocide: Typing speed? About 45-50wpm depending on my motivation. It's not so much my typing speed as much as it is the fact that I have a lot of time on my hands. I'm currently laid off at work due to it being off season and I'm not enrolled in college yet. I haven't decided if I want to go to college simply to major in English with the only intent in writing a novel. Most would be surprised that I actually want to drive a dump truck, later to drive an 18 wheeler, instead of a more, to put it bluntly, glamorous job. But then again, stranger things have happened. As for the medical part. I think I stayed away from that enough to make it work and why go back and change things? *shrugs* people will have to deal *grin*.
l/g fan 4 eva: It may take a while.. I want to... drag this one out. I have reason for that. The plot does thicken a little bit before it gets better but you'll have to see how that works out. I think it's obvious that in the end, Lizzie and Gordo will be together. I've already made romantic referrences to movies such as Gone With The Wind and Dirty Dancing. The hero must always get his lady! Not to worry.. just hang in there.
Remember Me
Chapter Four: She's Like The Wind
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Lizzie sat up in her bed, watching her mother fix a tray of food for her. It had been two days since she had been released from the hospital after twenty four hours of observation. Everything checked out fine and they had released her. Most of her general memory had come back. She remembered who everyone was, but not quite who everyone was in relationship to her, specially Gordo.
"Mom, what's my middle name?" there were still a few holes to fill in.
"Brooke." her mom put the tray in front of her daughter. She hated to admit it, but Lizzie had changed. She wasn't sure if this Lizzie was better or worse.
"That's a pretty name." she said thoughtfully.
"You used to complain about it a few years ago." her mother sat beside her and smiled. One thing was for sure, Lizzie was more open with talking to her now. She confided in her, and for that, Jo thought that just maybe everything would turn out all right in the end.
"Did I ever say why I hated my middle name?" Lizzie bit into an apple slice as she looked at her mom. She didn't know her mom very well, and she figured teens didn't usually talk so openly with their parents but she couldn't help it. If being open and closer to her mother would just help her remember things, then she was willing to try just about anything to feel normal again.
"Well, you didn't really say but Gordo used to have a girlfriend named Brooke and I think you hated sharing a name with her." Jo looked at her daughter.
"Did I always like Gordo.. you know, like that?" Lizzie was afraid, for the sake of her entire life up till the accident, that emotions had been rewired in her. She had several conversations with Miranda and Gordo about who she was and what she felt. She thought that she had been a little uptight about things before the accident and possibly a little naive. She was more relaxed now.
"I've always seen it, but you have to think about it, Gordo and you have known each other since you were very little." Jo said and got up leaving her daughter to her own thoughts. She knew that it would take time, but she hoped that for every ones sake, that Lizzie hadn't become so radically different.
Meanwhile, Miranda and Gordo sat in silence on the bus. Miranda was afraid to mention Lizzie's name because this was Tuesday, the first day back to school since the accident. Monday had been a holiday.
"I won't break." Gordo snapped at his silent friend, hating her for being quiet.
"Sorry." Miranda said, looking out a window. She couldn't bring herself to say anything more so she remained silent once again, as the bus continued to pick high school kids up for school.
Miranda was never quiet, never sullen. Gordo needed some form of normality in his life. He had just, in his mind, lost one of his best friends. He couldn't lose another now. Sure, physically, Lizzie was all there, but he couldn't stand how some of that sparkle he had grown to love, didn't show in her anymore. Love? What was love? Gordo wasn't sure anymore. Just last Friday he had a girlfriend that he'd wanted to be with for what seemed like forever. Now everything was different. Miranda was different. He was different, too. Lizzie wasn't the only person who had changed.
But some things hadn't changed. Gordo still had very strong feelings for Lizzie. He couldn't give up on the idea that they were meant to be together. Gordo felt cheated out of fate. Or was it fate that took her away from him? He didn't know anymore. He'd always been the cynical one, but never bitter. That had changed too. Gordo was bitter.
That day at school went by too slowly. Even though Gordo was bitter, he was eager to spend time with Lizzie and hope that her feelings came back. He just wanted everything back to normal again. Whatever normal was.
Lizzie sat in front of the TV rifeling through old movies in hopes to get reaquainted with society. A few of the movies she remembered, knowing that they were probably once her favorites. How things can change when you get amnesia. Now her favorite movies were the ones that she doubted she cared for too much. Gone With The Wind had especially touched her heart. No doubt, her mothers movie. She smiled to herself as she watched Scarlett throw herself into Rhett's arms.
As the movie ended, Lizzie was about to put in another when the doorbell rang. "I'll get it." Lizzie called to anyone who could hear her. Wipping the tears that had stained her face while she had watched Gone With The Wind, Lizzie pulled open the door to see the soft hazel eyes of her friend. "Hey Gordo." she said with a small smile, still sniffling.
"Why are you crying?" Gordo said, stepping forward to hug her, only to stop before he embarassed himself. Natural reaction.
"Oh, nothing is wrong. I was watching Gone With The Wind. Since the doctor doesn't want me going back to school right away I decided to do some catching up." Lizzie smiled and walked back over to the pile of tapes scattered on the coffee table. Picking one up, she pushed it into the VCR and pressed play.
"Have you watched all of these?" Gordo refered to a pile of tapes that Lizzie had put Gone With The Wind into.
"Yeah, I have a lot of time on my hands. Some of them I watched yesturday and last night in my room. One benefit of getting hit by a car is that my parents bought me a TV and a VCR for my room. They were sick of me always wanting to watch movies with the excuse of 'catching up with the times.'" Lizzie looked onto the TV screen as the opening lines to the song, 'Be My Baby' by the Ronettes filled her senses. The black and white images from the dance scenes in the movie, moving her.
"Dirty Dancing?" Gordo raised an eyebrow. It wasn't like Lizzie to be watching movies. Specially older movies. It wasn't 'fashionable'. He guessed they were Lizzie's mothers movies. He smiled as he saw the look of something he'd never seen before wash over her face.
Lizzie nodded, her eyes not leaving the screen as the old 50's car drove down a highway. The main character known as 'Baby' introducing the movie with the help of 'Big Girls Don't Cry' by Frankie Valli & The Four Seasons. "Yeah. I've seen it three times already. It's become sort of like my favorite movie. You know, for such opposites to attract." she sighed loningly.
If only she knew that he loved her. He probably wouldn't have realized it if he hadn't lost her the way that he did. As they say, you don't know what you have until it's lost. It hit home way too hard for Gordo to like this fact. Had he truely lost her? Gordo sighed as well, mirroring Lizzie's feelings, but for a whole seperate reason.
Here was the girl of his dreams, longing for the type of love on the TV screen when she had someone sitting right beside her, longing for that type of love with her. Lizzie looked at him, and then down at the floor. One thing she had learned while talking with everyone on the type of person she used to be, she learned that she had been quite oblivious to the things that went on around her. She wasn't now. She could read Gordo's thoughts by just one look at him. How come she was the only one who could see that Gordo wore his heart on his sleeve?
"Gordo." Lizzie said it softly, making sure she had his attention. He looked up at her but didn't say anything. "I know things are weird for you. I can only imagine what it would be like to confess how you feel to someone and then have them not remember it only a few days later." Gordo sighed again, looking down at his hands. She took one of them into her own. It had been just a friendly gesture but Gordo couldn't help the emotions that washed over him. This is the first time she had volentarily touched him since the accident. It was almost like he needed her touch.
"You've already changed a lot. I miss you." Well, it was the truth, she didn't need to know that is was more then that. Somehow she knew though. One more thing that had changed about Lizzie, she was observant. He couldn't seem to hide anything anymore.
"Give me time, Gordo. Really, we just need time to get to know each other again. I can't promise anything. Everyone, including myself, knows that I have changed. I've changed a lot. I don't think I can even consider myself the same person. You know, I read a book yesterday." Gordo's eyes got wide at the thought of Lizzie reading a book. "I know, shocker huh? My mom says I read a book called 'The Orchids and Gumbo Poker Club' and was obsessed with a mother/daughter relationship. My mom was the one who gave me this book. She thought that maybe I could relate." Lizzie shrugged.
"What book is it?" Gordo was at least glad that talking to her was still easy. Sure they talked about different stuff then they used to but he was glad that they were talking, nonetheless.
"My Sweet Audrina. It's by an author named V. C. Andrews. I guess she wrote a book called Flowers In The Attic that was later made into a movie?" Gordo just nodded in recognition. "Yeah, the movie is here. I was planning on watching it before I read that book. My mom has a few of her books. But, more to the point. It's about this girl. The second Audrina and how her parents are trying to make her be like their first daughter, the first and best Audrina." Lizzie told him, picking the book up off the table and examining it.
"So what happens?" Gordo asks, curiously. He could see how it related to her but he wanted to know how she thought it related to her. He'd give her a chance to explain it.
"Well, I haven't read the whole thing yet. I think there is still more that I'm not reading into this book. However, I think in a way, I'm the second Audrina and I'm afraid of people trying to get me to be the first Audrina 'cause I used to be the first Audrina. If that makes sense?" she looked up from the book. A deep expression was written on his face. This made her laugh. She knew that was a character trait from the old Gordo she grew up with.
"What?" Gordo just asked, shrugging his shoulders as Lizzie kept laughing at him. "Yeah it makes sense." he finally told her.
"Except, Gordo. I'm not the same person. I don't feel like the same person. The old Lizzie, she feels like maybe it's my sister everyone is referring too. It's only been three days and I can tell it's going to be so hard going back to school. I'll have to face everyone and they are going to expect Lizzie McGuire. You know, the clumsy, naive little girl that they grew up with. I'm not her anymore. She isn't me." Lizzie nervously pushed he hair back.
"Lizzie, calm down. Yes, you have changed. You aren't the same person, but you are still Lizzie, the little girl that everyone grew up with is still a part of you. People change, people grow up. You just did it a little faster and a little differently then anyone could have expected of you. That's all." Gordo said, finally getting the nerve to grasp her hand to comfort her. She accepted his hand and smiled slightly.
"I'm so glad I have a good friend like you, Gordo. You don't know how much you've held me together through all of this." Gordo smiled at her kind words. Normally anyone would have been enthused by a friend caring so much about their actions. He just couldn't shrug off the word 'friend'. It made him shiver.
Soon one week had gone by and another Monday rolled in. This was Lizzie's first day back to school. A day she was both dreading and looking forward too. On one hand, she would be able to get out of the house. Being cooped up in the house for so long had given her a case of cabin fever and her mom didn't want her leaving the house during the day, alone, afraid she'd forget her way and get lost. On the other hand, this was high school. She only knew maybe one third of the freshman class, and even less of the upper classmen. It had only been the first week into high school so she didn't have to try to be someone she wasn't for the sake of her classmates.
Miranda hadn't come over too much and Lizzie had a feeling that Miranda was afraid of how different Lizzie could be. Lizzie could tell she hadn't been the only one who changed since the accident. True, she couldn't remember a lot of things that she did with her two best friends. She even had to find out who was who on her speed dial because she hadn't labeled them and couldn't recognize the difference between Gordo and Miranda's numbers. She did, however, remember that Miranda had been a rather forward, although sometimes aggressive, person. The kind that would stand by a friend and always look on the positive side. This was not Miranda.
Lizzie got off the bus and followed Gordo since he had informed her that her locker was right next to his. Showing her, yet again, the trick on opening a locker, Lizzie looked at her schedule. Sure, by now, most of the students had memorized their schedules; but considering the circumstances, she had been given a pass to explain her tardiness for the next few days as she got reacquainted with the school. Lizzie got out a few books for her next couple of classes and waved to Gordo as she walked into her homeroom to start school.
Frustrated, Gordo slammed his locker and turned his back, leaning against it and closing his eyes.
"Having a rough one, Gord-don?" Ethan Craft. That was all that Gordo needed right now. He sighed. It wasn't Ethan's fault. Sure the guy was a little slow, but he was a nice guy, after all. Gordo opened his eyes and looked up at Ethan, who although, had grown much taller, hadn't changed too much since eighth grade.
"You have no idea." Gordo replied as he and Ethan walked into their mutual homeroom.
"It sucks, you know, what happened to Lizzie. At least she's okay!" Ethan tried to look on the bright side, unknowing of just how wrong he was. Lizzie was not okay. She was different. As much as Gordo wanted his old Lizzie back, she wasn't coming back. Unless he learned how to love the new Lizzie, and the new Lizzie learned to love him. He was afraid that, by no fault of his own, he had lost her forever. He sat silent as roll call began.
Later, during fifth period, Lizzie met up with Miranda and Gordo. "Hey guys." she greeted them, smiling. Her eyes drifted over the other students in her class. She had been trying to remember classmates. Trying to remember. It had begun to give her a headache and she had almost stopped when her eyes fell on a familiar face. A very cute, but definitely, familiar face. "Who's that?" she paused, Miranda's eyes following her gaze. Miranda's mouth opened to reply when Lizzie held up her hand. "Let me guess." Miranda shut her mouth and watched as her friend closed her eyes and rubbed her temple in concentration. She looked up again. "Evan?" Lizzie asked, unsure of herself.
"Close. Ethan." Miranda smiled at Lizzie's effort. Lizzie sighed.
"Now how come he isn't my boyfriend?" Lizzie half asked, half commented without thinking. As soon as she said it, she looked at Gordo apologetically. Although she knew that Miranda hadn't caught on, it was too obvious to her just how much her words had stung. Gordo looked uncomfortable under Lizzie's stare. He was very relieved when Gym started. Nothing like getting rid of some pent up frustration on a game of kickball, a soccer-like version of softball.
After school at the Gordon household, Gordo looked through stacks upon stacks of movies trying to find the once forgotten movie.
"Mom, where is the Dirty Dancing tape?" Gordo stepped into the kitchen for a second to see if she knew. His mom looked at him oddly.
"Is that what you have been looking for, for the last forty-five minutes?" she asked her son who only nodded. "What's with the fascination with that movie all of a sudden?" Nothing like having a parent analyze your actions.
"Nothing Mom. Lizzie has been watching a lot of movies lately, you know, to catch up. She wanted me to find her stuff like Gone With The Wind. It's all I could think of." Gordo lied to his mother. If he had told her the real reason was so he could watch it, it would have been embarrassing to say the least, and cause a lot of unwanted attention by his psychologist mother.
"It's in the movie cabinet under the TV" she said, still staring at her son with the same estranged expression.
"Thanks Mom." and with that Gordo was in the living room and then up the stairs in seconds, no doubt heading to his bedroom for privacy.
Towards the end of the movie, Gordo stared blankly at the television screen.
"I'll never be sorry." Patrick Swayze's character told 'Baby'. She agreed and they kissed as he climbed into the car. Patrick Swayze's voice came into focus as he sang the heartfelt ballad She's Like The Wind.
A/N: Woo! I finally got it all out. Took me longer than it normally would have to write this. I wasn't sure just how I'd incorporate the song She's Like The Wind. I thought it fit and was glad that it came out so well. Just a note though. I try not to put too much of me into the characters, as they are not me. However, Dirty Dancing is my all time favorite movie, and as some of you might have read in my short bio, that My Sweet Audrina is among one of my favorite books. I didn't spoil the book incase, at some later date, you are interested in reading it. If you have liked my work so far and like the direction in which this story is going, I highly recommend this book. I think no writer, or reader is complete without it.