Disclaimer: Tolkiens characters are not mine, and they are very happy because of that.
Just a silly little thing I wrote one night. Has very little hints of slash. Just to be safe it's put under pg-13. This is a little gift for all the readers, because I haven't updated for so long... Sorry everyone!
Evil-Frodo's Last Stand
It was that day with winter sun,
And ever lasting Elfling-fun…
Four travelers with furry feet,
and cheeks flushed like the reddest beet,
pulling along something small,
arrived in the great Rivendell Hall.
Were they Hobbits, were they Elves,
They weren't even sure themselves,
A Council was made once again,
"Council of Rivendell's …*ahem*… sexy men"
"Why was this made again, what is the cause?"
Lord Elrond asked after a brief (well, actually long) pause.
"Ah hell, not again, Ada forgot why!"
One of the twins let out in a cry.
But one of the Hobbits, I think it was Sam,
Stepped forward with a: "Pardon me ma'am?"
With a glare fiercer then a Balrogs our Elfie did hiss:
"Yes, stupid fur-foot, what the heck is amiss?"
The Hobbit so wisely ignored the Elf's glare,
(And the remark on his curly foot hair,)
"We have stumbled upon a remarkable thing,
A very strange Hobbit-like scary being."
A snarl from the sack was not to be ignored,
But our…um, sexy Council was getting quiet bored
"So Gollem is back, why the heck should we care?"
asked a tall elf with remarkably pretty hair,
"It is not Gollem, it looks like kinda us…"
Pippin stated with a look of disgust,
"It has dark hair and the biggest of eyes."
Merry continued with a look of despise,
Frodo, offended, looked at the Rivendell Elf:
"It actually looks a lot like myself."
Some sniggering and giggling was heard from the twins,
And that was the moment the true mayhem begins:
The sack begins moving and growling and shaking,
Like something in there was quickly awakening...
The Hobbits they yelp, the Elves they do shriek,
Making them look very girlish and weak.
The sack it was ripped open by nails very long,
On very dirty hands they did belong.
With a growl and a hiss the creature now appeared,
Making even the Dwarfs cower behind their own beard.
"My precioussss, my pressssioussss, give it back, give it back!"
The strange creature hissed as he crawled out of the sack.
It looked like a Hobbit, and was as tall as a Man,
It growled worse than even an Orc can.
It had messy hair, but not on his feet,
And his clothes were anything but clean or neat.
It leered at the Hobbits and growled at the Men,
And hissed at a petrified Elfling or ten.
"The Ring, you mean, ugly Frodo-like guy?"
Estel or Argorn asked the thing why.
"Nooo, the Pressssssiousss!" the thing shouted back,
As Evil-Frodo's eyes turned nearly black.
Then, without a warning, straight out of the blue,
Evil-Frodo pounced, no practically flew...
At Glorfindel reading the new "Play-Elf"
And our blond Elf Lord, beside himself,
Shrieked like a girl and coward away,
Till safe from harm in Elladan's lap he lay.
Who was not complaining a word to the Lord,
Actually Elladans smile went broad.
Evil-Frodo he held on to the "Play Elf" ever so tight,
And the Elves figured that without putting up a fight,
They'd never see that "Play Elf" again.
So The Council of Rivendell's…sexy men,
Came to an end and as they all walked away.
Leaving Evil-Frodo alone and to this day ,
He has never been seen or heard from for that matter.
Well, there have been roomers of the latter,
That when Elflings so young lay down in there beds...
With "Play Elf" hidden under their pillows and heads,
Sneaking a peek every now and then...
That the Thing from the 'Council of sexy men'
Comes around at their house growling and hissing,
About all the "pressssioussssseeesssessss" he is missing.
So all ye small Elflings when going to bed...
Do not try to sneak the "Play Elf" under your heads.
For what I just told you about Evil Frodo's last stand,
Might happen again in the Elven land.
*********
Um, I do not take responsibility for petrified Elflings and such. Now lets just hope 'Play Elf' won't sue me for the bad publicity.
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*Beeeeep*