Anyway, Gideon and I rowed out into the open waters, away from the piers where we might be overheard.
"All right," I said and glanced at my watch. "You've got twenty minutes. I'm timing you."
He scratched his beard. "Where to begin?"
"Why don't you tell me why you left."
"It's . . . complicated. I couldn't even begin to make you understand in twenty minutes."
I looked out at the endless ocean and took comfort in knowing that this same body of water touched the shores of home. "Don't you feel bad about leaving everything behind? Don't you miss your family?"
He shrugged. "I miss them sometimes, but I don't feel bad."
I stared at him. "You don't feel bad that your parents worry about you and miss you every day? Don't you care that Gabriel's lost without you?"
Gideon laughed at this. "Gabriel," he said. "He betrayed me. And my parents, well, they drove me away by insisting I be a SeeD."
"When we were kids, that's all you ever wanted to be," I said. "And how did Gabriel betray you?"
"You don't remember?"
I shook my head no.
"If you don't remember, I won't tell you. But, I will say, he betrayed me by loving you more than I did. He was plotting to steal you away from me, and he did, though you never knew the difference."
"What are you talking about? Gabriel and I have never been more than friends."
Gideon chuckled as if he knew a secret and wanted me to figure it out on my own. "Lets just say that Gabriel was always a little . . . unstable. Remember, as kids? He was always my shadow, he wanted every toy I had, he wanted to play every game with me. As we got older, his need to be just like me became unbearable."
I found what he confessed hard to believe. It wasn't that Gabriel wanted what Gideon had, it was that Gideon had always taken what he wanted without concern for others. As a child, Gideon had taken the best toys, the largest piece of cake, the last cookie in the jar. I wanted to tell him this, but I held my tongue. "And what about Maia? Did she betray you too?"
He shook his head. "I never really knew her. She had her life and I had mine, the two rarely intersected. It's hard to miss someone you barely know, Micala."
I paused, remembering when he'd called me his eclipse. "And me?"
He took a long time to answer this question, and when he finally did, he stared out to sea, apparently wrapped up in an old memory. "You betrayed me too, without knowing it."
"What did I do, Gideon? Did I hurt you so badly?" I was angry with him, and not afraid to let my anger show. Much of what he said was half delusion. His perspective on things past seemed a little skewed, and I wondered about his sanity.
"You outshined me in every way possible. That's the truth, Micala. My father loved you more than he loved me. You were the Darling from day one, and you still are, from what I hear."
I had no words to respond to that, so he continued.
"The legacy of the fated should have been mine, but you were always better, smarter, faster . . . even in my own father's eyes, you were the best." He said this with so much bitterness, I knew that he'd never realized how good he really had been. He truly believed that I eclipsed him, but the truth was, he never bothered to try. "You were the star. The shining one. You could do no wrong in the eyes of Garden."
"You're wrong about that," I said. "You could have been the star if you had ever cared enough to try. And in your fathers eyes, in my eyes, you could have been, and should have been the best, not me."
"Whatever," he said.
"You never lost in training, Gideon. I never once beat you."
He sighed. "I don't want to talk about this anymore."
"What do you want to talk about, then?"
"I did want to warn you about the guy you work for, Danau," he said. "He's no joke, Micala."
"Don't you think I know that? I've been on this case for almost a year now, and I'm well aware of the danger," I said, "Besides. Why should you care?"
He sighed and looked at me with a frustrated expression. "Because, despite what I said or did, I still care about what happens to you, and I don't want to see you hurt. Danau will kill you if he knew you were working against him."
I paused. "Does he know who you are, Gideon?"
"I suspect he does, but I've done enough dirty deeds in the last four years to mar the Leonhart name for eternity."
I stared at him. "If he does, then you put me in danger today by saying my name in public. If he connects the dots, It's pretty obvious who I am."
"I know." He said this as if he didn't care. I wanted to hit him.
"If he does, then we're both dead."
"I know." He was now exasperated. "But you didn't have to come with me, you know. It's as much your doing as mine."
He was right about that, and I didn't have the strength to argue with him. "Your twenty minutes is up," I said. "Take me back."
He laughed. "And what if I don't?"
"Then I'll row back in myself."
Gideon seized the oars and threw them overboard. "What are you going to do now?"
He was crazy. I could see the madness in his eyes, in his wicked smile.
Without warning, he seized my shoulders and pressed his lips against mine. I tried to shove him away, but his grip on me tightened. In desperation, I brought my knee up and it smashed into his groin. He howled in pain and one of his hands seized my neck.
I couldn't breathe. "Bitch," he whispered hoarsely. "I'll fucking kill you."
With all my strength I fought him, but he would not release his grip from my throat. I clawed at his face, at his eyes, I kicked at him, all to no avail. I was losing strength fast, and my lungs ached in my chest. The blackness was coming swiftly, I knew, but I couldn't shake him.
I thought I was going to die, and I thought about you, Daddy. And mom, and Aida and Julien, but mostly, I thought about you.
It was then that I spied a large fish hook on the floor of the boat. It was a crude weapon, but it might work. With one hand, I pulled on his hair, and with the other, I fumbled for the hook. After several long, precious seconds, it's tip pierced my thumb, I picked it up and concealed it in my hand.
My lungs were on fire, and I was beginning to see starry floaters behind my eyes. My heartbeat was in my ears, and it drowned out whatever it was he was saying to me. I couldn't hear a word of it. I was on the verge of passing out, and I felt terribly weak from the effort of fighting him.
I went limp, and counted to ten, as my body screamed for oxygen. He must have thought I'd passed out, but he didn't release my throat. Slowly, weak and tired, I raised my hand and plunged the hook into his neck, then yanked it downward with what little strength I had left. I heard his scream.
Gideon released my throat and his hands went to the hole in his neck. The hook had gone all the way through the flesh there and torn a jagged hole there that bled rivers down the side of his face.
I gasped for air for it seemed I couldn't get enough in. My body ached from the roots of my hair to the tips of my toes as I sucked in breath after breath. It tasted sweeter than candy.
Enraged at what I'd done, he came at me again, but I was ready for him this time. I balled up my fists and went after him boxing style, pummeling him with such force he was knocked backwards. I bloodied his lips, his nose, blackened his eyes. Had I brought my gunblade or my junctions, I would have killed him. In my fury, I'd straddled his chest and grabbed him by the hair, mindless as I repeatedly struck his face with my fists. I heard his screams, along with my own, but I couldn't make myself stop. Even after he'd gone limp, I continued to beat him, senseless and driven by pure rage. It was paybacks, I guess. For the pain he'd put us all through, for making us all care and worry.
All that time, wondering where he was, wondering about him, missing him, loving him, it was all a waste. I hated him for making us all care when he didn't deserve a passing thought.
Daddy, that was the first time I truly lost it. Never before had I let anything affect me so much, and never before had I lost control like that. I didn't like the feeling, but once the rage took over, I couldn't stop myself. It was as if something took over and did the work for me. And it wasn't the last time that happened, but I'll get to that later.
When I stopped, my hands were swollen and covered with his blood. He lay unconscious and bloody. I'd done a number on him all right. His nose was most likely broken, his lips were purple and caked with blood, and both eyes had already begun to swell. It was the first time I'd bested him, but I didn't feel the pride I might have if it had merely been a training session. It was different. It was something I shouldn't have had to do.
I had to get back to shore before he woke, but he'd disposed of the oars and the lights of FH had become distant as the tide took us out. I had two options. Find something to paddle with or swim it. Truth be told, I was too tired to swim, and my swelling hands would likely keep me from getting far. Never mind that the ocean here was still quite cold and I'd probably die of hypothermia before I reached the harbor.
I searched the floor of the boat and found a tackle box and three piece oar made of plastic. It was one of those compact oars, you know, the kind people use for rafting. It was just what I needed.
Inside the tackle box were several items that might come in handy. A fillet knife, fishing hooks, and a spool of 70 pound test line, perfect for restraining my ex-lover turned crazed madman. I bound his hands first, then his feet, and I made certain the knots were tight. It was a relief to know that he could no longer harm me.
I rowed through the night, though the effort made my hands ache. I wished I could row all the way back to Balamb and forget that any of this ever happened. Thoughts of family were a comfort. I missed my family so much, but at least I knew that some day soon, I'd see you all again.
When I stopped to rest, I checked Gideon's pulse. It wasn't that I cared if he was dead or alive, I was just checking. His breathing was shallow, but he was alive. I don't think I would have felt bad if he were dead. Is that wrong daddy?
Whatever, I noticed a leather strap underneath his shirt, at the shoulder. A holster. So, he'd had a gun. He could have shot me and gotten it over with, but instead, he preferred to strangle me. How very . . . psychotic. I took it and checked the chambers. Six rounds. Perfect.
Just before dawn, Gideon opened his eyes, or at least, he tried to. The were so swollen, I could only seen narrow slivers of his eyes. "Kalie?" he croaked. He struggled to sit up, but couldn't because of the bindings on his wrists. "What the fuck?" he mumbled.
I pointed the pistol at him. "Try any funny stuff and I shoot you in the crotch." My voice was hoarse, and each word was painful, but I did my best not to show it. I put the gun in my lap and continued to row. We'd soon be at the docks, and back on dry land again.
"Untie me," he demanded.
"Nope," I said. "Not till we get back to shore, and not before you swear on your life that you won't reveal who I am to Danau."
"Why should I do that?" His words were garbled and broken.
"I'll take you down with me."
He stared at me in disbelief. His mouth moved to speak, but no words came out. I could tell he didn't like being threatened, but he was in no position to disagree.
"Oh, and by the way, Gideon. That crap you were spouting about the legacy? About how it belonged to you? You're wrong. It doesn't. It belongs to all of us, not just you. I don't know where you got the idea that it was just yours and that I stole it from you. It's always belonged to us."
"You're not part of the legacy!" he cried. "It was mine and you took it away from me!"
"No, Gideon, you took it away from yourself," I fired back. "You expected everything to be handed to you, but that's not how it works. I earned it, you didn't."
He closed his eyes and remained silent for the rest of the trip. I guessed he wasn't feeling so well. After the kind of beating I gave him, it wasn't such a surprise. Except, it was Gideon. I shouldn't have been able to beat him. Maybe the years of not training had made him weak.
There was no one on the docks when I rowed in.
"You never answered me," I said. "You keep my secret, and I keep yours?"
"If I say no, you'll kill me. What choice do I have?" he asked. He was mocking me, and I didn't like it.
"This is not a joke, Leon," I said. "Do I have your word or not?"
"Fine. You have my word. Now untie me."
Reluctantly, I cut the fishing line from his wrists and ankles with the fillet knife.
As I put the knife away, he balled up his fist and punched me in the mouth. "That's for beating the crap out of me." he said as he climbed from the boat.
I wiped the blood from my lips with the back of my hand and pointed the gun at his left leg. I squeezed the trigger and the bullet grazed the outside of his calf and wedged itself into the wood of a pillar behind him. I squeezed again and the bullet struck the meat of his calf, and he screamed out obscenities at me.
"That's for making us all care about you."
He clutched his wound and climbed to his feet. "Watch your back Micala," he said. "Because I'm going to make your life hell. I'll be around every bend in the road, and when the time comes, I'll destroy you. Piece by piece, I'm going to take away everything you love, and when there's no one left but you, I'll kill you too."
Daddy, I should have put a bullet into his brain right then.
****Notes****
Moving along nicely. It only gets better from here.
On an editing note, I noticed that the other chapters in this story,
I wrote that this was a FFXIII tale...oops! Will fix.
Is anyone reading? Please R/R, I like to know the story's getting
read.