Oh So Cold
Part Eleven: Brave Hearts
By: Samsara
Outside, the storm had kicked up pretty badly. Still clad in his uniform, Yukito ran down the drenched streets with amazing speed, feeling as though the world was at his back, chasing him into his decision. It didn't matter now, and it never mattered from the beginning. Perhaps he had once mattered, to someone, somewhere. Not anymore. Maybe when Yuki was younger, people cared about him. He had been so happy and outgoing, an adventurer into a world he'd never met. People: adults and peers, flocked to him, gathering around him a safety net of friends and almost family. But they were gone now, that safety net of people. It wasn't very late into the evening, so people were still out as Yukito ran into town. People, people of all kinds were there, milling around, and looking so happy.
God, if only he could be one of them.
---------------------------------------------------------------
"So, tell me the truth... did he really try and, you know..."
Touya blinked and then turned. He and Kio were sitting in front of the TV, guzzling down soda and watching an old episode of "Smallville". The question surprised Touya, who momentarily, had no clue what Kio was talking about.
"What? What are you talking about?" Touya inquired, draining his soda can and getting up. Kio watched Touya as he sauntered into the kitchen, half expecting a growl from his soccer companion.
"You know, everyone's talking about it. Why Yukito-kun was missing for a week. People said he tried to kill himself," Kio answered smugly.
"Why does it matter why he'd gone? What is so special about Yuki being gone? Can't you guys give it a rest?" Touya shrugged off the question. He didn't like where this conversation was going. He grabbed another soda and leaned against the counter, listening to his friend.
"I don't know. I just think it's pretty damn disrespectful, that's all,"
Touya slammed his soda can onto the counter.
"What..." was all he managed to say.
"I mean, he probably just did it for attention, and he's always been in the way. You have to admit, it's not very fun hanging out with him. He's a goody-goody and so feminine. I feel sorry for you and your family. You're going to have to put him up and pay his bill. He won't talk to anyone, he's so disrespectful to his peers. Why do you hang out with him? Why do you even bother?" Kio was so cool when he said this, so calm and collected. There was no emotion, only the cocky attitude that almost everyone in the world had. Touya stared at his friend in disbelief. Why was he saying such horrible things about Yuki? Yuki had never harmed anyone!
"What the hell are you saying? You don't know a damn thing about him! And since when did you ever stop and talk to him? Just because he doesn't fall all over you popular kids doesn't mean he's disrespectful!" Touya yelled.
" Geez, there's no reason to get all angry on me, man! I'm just saying what I think," Kio replied quickly.
"I don't give a flying fuck about why you think! If you're going to go and think like that, you can take your thoughts elsewhere!" Touya snapped, glaring at Kio. Kio, for a minute, was shocked. Then, glowering back at Touya he snarled, "You never did care what anyone thought! You're so stupid! Don't you want to fit in?"
"NO! I don't want to hear it!" Touya yelled back.
"Aww, poor baaby Touya, can't stand to see what's true!" Kio mocked, heading for the door.
"GET OUT!!" Touya screamed, his breathing hard and his chest tight. He didn't need to mocked in his own home, especially by such an uncivil bastard. Fortunately, Kio was out the door by "GET".
Touya slouched against the fridge, steadying his heart. Is this what Yuki went through today? Did Yuki always have to be protecting himself from such people? Finally Touya understood Yuki. He understood why Yuki had never cared what anyone else in school thought. After school, the popular kids who were so cruel to everyone would be the same as their victims, struggling to get into universities, looking for jobs. Everyone was the same, and it didn't matter. Yuki never used to care what anyone would say to him. When Yuki found himself under pressure from heinous insults on his personality, he always had Touya to depend on. So why was Yuki so self-conscious now? Why was he so worried about these kids? He could defend himself against...
No. Yuki could defend himself, he was too nice. Yuki had always looked upon Touya for defense and companionship...
But Touya wasn't there. He'd been so wrapped up in his own affairs...
"Dear God," Touya muttered to himself. Clearing his head, he gritted his teeth and ran up the stairs. He needed to make it up to Yuki, somehow. His absence had probably been a main source in Yuki's suicide attempt. Yuki had probably heard everything downstairs, and could even be in tears!
"Yuki! Yuki, come out, I need to talk with you!" Touya banged on Yuki's door. Touya was again filled with the desperation he'd had when looking for Yuki after finding his note. When no reply came, Touya burst into the empty room.
Immediately noticing the open window and the clothes strewn about from fast packing, Touya swore. Now Yuki had run away. Wasting no time, Touya went to the garage, pulled out his father's jeep and a cell phone, and began the search.
-------------------------------------------
By the time Yuki got to the train station, rush hour was passed and only about twenty people were waiting for a train. After glancing carefully at a map of Japan, Yuki decided to take a trip up to the coast, and from there, ferry himself to China. He'd be far away from Touya and all the destruction he'd caused. The train ticket wasn't much, but Yuki did worry how he'd support himself. He could end up on the streets, as a pusher or whore. Neither option sounded appealing, so Yuki promised himself he'd never sink that low. As for the question of Touya, Yuki didn't care if Touya scoured the world for him. Yuki wouldn't let himself be caught. Sitting on a bench on the platform, Yuki gathered himself. The train didn't come for another fifteen minutes.
"Do I really want to do this? Is what happened worth leaving for? I used to be so strong, why don't I try that! Why don't I try and be strong, get over this and stay with what I know? WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME!? What happened to everything I used to have? What the hell did I do? Why does everyone want to leave me? I don't understand, and no one will tell me... I'm so confused." Yuki thought.
"Don't go," part of Yuki whispered softly, the sound a gentle hum in his ear.
"Why shouldn't I leave! I could start over, no one would know me, and I could become famous and live my dreams without anyone making fun of me! I don't need that crap!" Yuki replied to himself, partly amused at his indecision.
" You need help, the kind of help you can only get from the one you love. If you're so adamant about going, I'm going to get us a second opinion and find someone who will care for us, who will take care of us, here and now!" Yuki's half answered. Before Yuki could answer himself, he felt his eyes leaking and his heart beating so wildly he felt like he were about to explode. His lips flew open and a scream, first silent and then undeniably loud, raced through the air and echoed in the tracks of his destiny,
"SOMEONE HELP ME FROM MYSELF!!!"
Then, everything stopped.
------------------------------
A.N./ Ha-ha, took another week for this post but, I had makeup work to do. London was fun and cool, like it always is, and I don't have to go through jetlag. One more chapter to go, and maybe an epilogue. Yay! Thanks for all the support, most appreciated! -Samsara
Outside, the storm had kicked up pretty badly. Still clad in his uniform, Yukito ran down the drenched streets with amazing speed, feeling as though the world was at his back, chasing him into his decision. It didn't matter now, and it never mattered from the beginning. Perhaps he had once mattered, to someone, somewhere. Not anymore. Maybe when Yuki was younger, people cared about him. He had been so happy and outgoing, an adventurer into a world he'd never met. People: adults and peers, flocked to him, gathering around him a safety net of friends and almost family. But they were gone now, that safety net of people. It wasn't very late into the evening, so people were still out as Yukito ran into town. People, people of all kinds were there, milling around, and looking so happy.
God, if only he could be one of them.
---------------------------------------------------------------
"So, tell me the truth... did he really try and, you know..."
Touya blinked and then turned. He and Kio were sitting in front of the TV, guzzling down soda and watching an old episode of "Smallville". The question surprised Touya, who momentarily, had no clue what Kio was talking about.
"What? What are you talking about?" Touya inquired, draining his soda can and getting up. Kio watched Touya as he sauntered into the kitchen, half expecting a growl from his soccer companion.
"You know, everyone's talking about it. Why Yukito-kun was missing for a week. People said he tried to kill himself," Kio answered smugly.
"Why does it matter why he'd gone? What is so special about Yuki being gone? Can't you guys give it a rest?" Touya shrugged off the question. He didn't like where this conversation was going. He grabbed another soda and leaned against the counter, listening to his friend.
"I don't know. I just think it's pretty damn disrespectful, that's all,"
Touya slammed his soda can onto the counter.
"What..." was all he managed to say.
"I mean, he probably just did it for attention, and he's always been in the way. You have to admit, it's not very fun hanging out with him. He's a goody-goody and so feminine. I feel sorry for you and your family. You're going to have to put him up and pay his bill. He won't talk to anyone, he's so disrespectful to his peers. Why do you hang out with him? Why do you even bother?" Kio was so cool when he said this, so calm and collected. There was no emotion, only the cocky attitude that almost everyone in the world had. Touya stared at his friend in disbelief. Why was he saying such horrible things about Yuki? Yuki had never harmed anyone!
"What the hell are you saying? You don't know a damn thing about him! And since when did you ever stop and talk to him? Just because he doesn't fall all over you popular kids doesn't mean he's disrespectful!" Touya yelled.
" Geez, there's no reason to get all angry on me, man! I'm just saying what I think," Kio replied quickly.
"I don't give a flying fuck about why you think! If you're going to go and think like that, you can take your thoughts elsewhere!" Touya snapped, glaring at Kio. Kio, for a minute, was shocked. Then, glowering back at Touya he snarled, "You never did care what anyone thought! You're so stupid! Don't you want to fit in?"
"NO! I don't want to hear it!" Touya yelled back.
"Aww, poor baaby Touya, can't stand to see what's true!" Kio mocked, heading for the door.
"GET OUT!!" Touya screamed, his breathing hard and his chest tight. He didn't need to mocked in his own home, especially by such an uncivil bastard. Fortunately, Kio was out the door by "GET".
Touya slouched against the fridge, steadying his heart. Is this what Yuki went through today? Did Yuki always have to be protecting himself from such people? Finally Touya understood Yuki. He understood why Yuki had never cared what anyone else in school thought. After school, the popular kids who were so cruel to everyone would be the same as their victims, struggling to get into universities, looking for jobs. Everyone was the same, and it didn't matter. Yuki never used to care what anyone would say to him. When Yuki found himself under pressure from heinous insults on his personality, he always had Touya to depend on. So why was Yuki so self-conscious now? Why was he so worried about these kids? He could defend himself against...
No. Yuki could defend himself, he was too nice. Yuki had always looked upon Touya for defense and companionship...
But Touya wasn't there. He'd been so wrapped up in his own affairs...
"Dear God," Touya muttered to himself. Clearing his head, he gritted his teeth and ran up the stairs. He needed to make it up to Yuki, somehow. His absence had probably been a main source in Yuki's suicide attempt. Yuki had probably heard everything downstairs, and could even be in tears!
"Yuki! Yuki, come out, I need to talk with you!" Touya banged on Yuki's door. Touya was again filled with the desperation he'd had when looking for Yuki after finding his note. When no reply came, Touya burst into the empty room.
Immediately noticing the open window and the clothes strewn about from fast packing, Touya swore. Now Yuki had run away. Wasting no time, Touya went to the garage, pulled out his father's jeep and a cell phone, and began the search.
-------------------------------------------
By the time Yuki got to the train station, rush hour was passed and only about twenty people were waiting for a train. After glancing carefully at a map of Japan, Yuki decided to take a trip up to the coast, and from there, ferry himself to China. He'd be far away from Touya and all the destruction he'd caused. The train ticket wasn't much, but Yuki did worry how he'd support himself. He could end up on the streets, as a pusher or whore. Neither option sounded appealing, so Yuki promised himself he'd never sink that low. As for the question of Touya, Yuki didn't care if Touya scoured the world for him. Yuki wouldn't let himself be caught. Sitting on a bench on the platform, Yuki gathered himself. The train didn't come for another fifteen minutes.
"Do I really want to do this? Is what happened worth leaving for? I used to be so strong, why don't I try that! Why don't I try and be strong, get over this and stay with what I know? WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME!? What happened to everything I used to have? What the hell did I do? Why does everyone want to leave me? I don't understand, and no one will tell me... I'm so confused." Yuki thought.
"Don't go," part of Yuki whispered softly, the sound a gentle hum in his ear.
"Why shouldn't I leave! I could start over, no one would know me, and I could become famous and live my dreams without anyone making fun of me! I don't need that crap!" Yuki replied to himself, partly amused at his indecision.
" You need help, the kind of help you can only get from the one you love. If you're so adamant about going, I'm going to get us a second opinion and find someone who will care for us, who will take care of us, here and now!" Yuki's half answered. Before Yuki could answer himself, he felt his eyes leaking and his heart beating so wildly he felt like he were about to explode. His lips flew open and a scream, first silent and then undeniably loud, raced through the air and echoed in the tracks of his destiny,
"SOMEONE HELP ME FROM MYSELF!!!"
Then, everything stopped.
------------------------------
A.N./ Ha-ha, took another week for this post but, I had makeup work to do. London was fun and cool, like it always is, and I don't have to go through jetlag. One more chapter to go, and maybe an epilogue. Yay! Thanks for all the support, most appreciated! -Samsara