Blast you
Author: Ilúvënis Telperiën
Websites: http://iluvenis.cjb.net (Homepage)
http://www.silhouette.cjb.net (Rukawa)
http://www.thunderstormsenru.cjb.net (SenRu)
Genre: Humor (??)
Ratings: Eh well…PG-13?
Author's note: …zzz…
Disclaimer: *Beep* SD does not belong to me…*Beep* I'm just so jealous of Inoue-sensei…
Summary: What happens when the SD people are out-of-character? Go figure… ^^;; As usual, these crap will end at Chapter 8, so you know what to expect. ^___^
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Episode four Open theme song: Do Re Mi Beer: Composed by Homer J. SimpsonDough, the stuff that buys me beer
[Scene: Sakuragi sitting in a pile of flour.]
Ray, the guy who sells me beer
[Scene: Rukawa taking a glass of beer from somebody.]
Me, the guy who drinks the beer
[Scene: Mitsui drinking from a beer can.]
Far, the distance to my beer
[Scene: Akagi takes a ruler and measures something on the world map.]
So, I think I'll have a beer
[Scene: Miyagi sobbing after being dumped by Ayako.]
La, lalalalala beer…
[Scene: SD people sit around to drink beer.]
Tea, no thanks I'm drinking beer
[Scene: Old man looking furious, "But it's the tradition!"]
…That will bring us back to
[Scene: Kiyota turns mug over and watch the empty bottom of the mug.]
D'oh!
[Flow of beer rushes out from somewhere, carrying the big sign "Blast you!"]
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[ Last episode…
"But Eddie," Fujima sat up, "If your oven's blasted, where did these cookies come from?"]
Everyone turned to look at Eddie suspiciously, "Yeah, where did they come from?"
"I eh…bought them, of course."
"You said your mum made them," Sendoh narrowed his eyes angrily, "You were lying?"
"Eh…"
"I'm gonna check it out," Rukawa jumped from the couch and ran into the kitchen.
"Me too," Sendoh followed,
"Me three," Fujima went.
In the end everyone went into the kitchen.
There, sitting on top of the mantelpiece, was a shiny, gleaming, brand new oven. The exact model as the one destroyed.
"You better explain this, Eddie," Rukawa's eyes flashed threateningly, his mild temper changing for the worse, "Eddie?"
The girl had already disappeared. They dashed out of the door only to see the back of the cargo carrion.
"Kogure! You've got a motorbike, use it!"
"Right," The brunette grabbed his helmet from the table and ran out.
A second later an enraged yell issued from the driveway, "Damned girl, she
punctured the wheels!"
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"Daddy, I swear I wasn't trying to cheat Kaede, but I need to get a new oven for mummy," Eddie had a sickeningly pathetic puppy-dog look on her face.
"So you went all out to exploit Kaede, did you?" Her father dabbed another blotch of paint on the portrait that he was painting, "Girl, what did I teach you?"
"It wasn't exploiting, Daddy, he destroyed the oven Mummy lent me! Then Mummy bought me the new one without knowing that hers was blasted, she'll murder me and chop me into pieces and boil me for curry!"
"Oh,"
"Don't just say 'oh', Daddy! Help me! The guys are going to storm down our house in another ten minutes' time!"
"Ah, why didn't you explain it to them?"
"DADDY!"
"See, I told you never to tell untruths, as the saying of Confucius goes…"
Eddie had already charged out of the door, screaming about sagely fathers.
Her mother came out of the kitchen, "Eh? How come Ed didn't stay for dinner? What was she telling you, Daddy?"
"Nothing, can I have some cookies?"
"Sure. She rarely comes home and this time she did, she only stayed for five minutes! That girl, I must really speak to her soon…"
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"Where did she go?" The boys had abandoned all the vehicles and decided to chase on foot instead. After all, cargo carrions are not supposed to travel more than 40 km per hour. She couldn't be far.
"She must have escaped home, I mean, to her parents' house," Rukawa guessed, "It's two streets away from here…Shit! That's the cargo-carrion!" He pointed at the humongous vehicle about two kilometers away (it was hard to miss, you see).
The boys gave chase immediately. When they neared the house, they saw the girl dash out and jump into the vehicle, rolling away.
"She's moving again! Guys!" Sendoh yelled, "Grab her before she gets out of the county!"
Well, as you know, a cargo-carrion can't travel faster than six agitated basketball players.
Eddie was rapidly stopped and dragged out of the car, much to her bewildered neighbors' shock.
"Eddie, am I supposed to call the police?" A man in his thirties who was watering his plants, asked.
"No thanks, Inoue Sensei, yech! Don't strangle me, Kaede! You are a nice person, right? I…*choke*.."
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"So that was what happened," Maki rubbed his temples wearily.
"You could have just told us everything, why lie to Kaede?" Fujima said, without looking up from his book, "You delayed my reading by thirty pages…"
"Kaede, if I told you that the oven's supposed to be for my mum, would you work for it?"
"No," He replied smoothly.
"He'd most likely ask you to lend your mum your oven," Sendoh perceived easily.
"See? Knowing Kaede, I had to do this," Eddie sighed miserably.
"Then, what's with all the car washing?" Maki suddenly remembered.
"It happened to need some cleaning-up," Eddie grinned.
"WHAT? You mean I went through all those hours for nothing?" Kaede's temper started flaring again.
"Whoowhee, cool it Kaede, you are getting influenced by Akira," Eddie smiled, "Since you guys are already here, want to have a game of three against three?"
"Sure, what's for dinner?" Maki asked enthusiastically.
"Um…I'll bake cookies…"
"NO MORE COOKIES!" The boys yelled simultaneously.
"…And cook Chinese cuisine for dinner." She finished off, smiling.
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[Closing theme song]: I've got my eyes only on you Anata Dake Mitsumeteru by
I've got my eyes only on you.
Since the day we met - now and forever -
when you're next to me, I don't need anything else
Dream's high tension
All of my wishes came true
on a gentle winter day,
on a shy, timid, special driving date.
Since it seemed to please you,
I quit using makeup
and carried a pager so you could reach me anywhere.
I got to know about cars
I even got to like soccer
I'm still a little hesitant, but
I'm set on following you for all my life.
I've got my eyes only on you
Since the day we met - now and forever -
When you're next to me, I don't need anything else
Love's high tension
Since you seemed to want me to,
I started heading straight home,
and I straightened out the rough way I used to talk.
Since it seemed to bother you,
I stopped talking on the phone for so long,
and got rid of all the easily-available guys
My hair and clothes aren't eye-catching
Try my best at cooking, so...
I wish I could go to a party...
I even broke it off with that girl you didn't like.
I've got my eyes only on you
I don't smile like I used to.
I was so bad at it - spicy your mama
Now here I am just serving you tea
Dangerous High Tension
I love you
It's an entrance to the paradise in the hill
Changing my mind, and my dream,
and keeps on running in my heart
Like you will know how
I'm crazy for you
I've got my eyes only on you
And now there is no one else.
I want to live simply,
and be your kind of woman!! Love power Wow wow wow!
I've got my eyes only on you
Waiting alone in a room for two
Your smile is like a rose-colored chain
Go on!! Dreaming woman without dreams!!
Oh, wow wow wow!
Author's note:
My ending comment bears only this – Girl, get a life!