Imladris Revisited
By: DLR 2002
Disclaimer: Characters owned by the estate of JRR Tolkien
Elrond/OFC
Rated: PG13 Sexual References

Chapter 10

It had been nearly a week and Culurien had scarcely come out of her room, having trays sent up for meals. She was fine, she told Arwen through the door, the spring grass and flowers made her eyes all itchy and swollen and the day in the field had aggravated the condition.

No, she did not want Arwen's father to make her anything, she had already done so, herself. Let me see you, Arwen had said, then, oh yes, no wonder you do not come down, you look like you have been crying for weeks.

When will it go away?  Arwen had asked, but she did not know. Well, come and see me if you want company, Arwen had said. She did not care if you looked terrible.

Culurien bathed her face in a basin of cool water and cursed herself for a fool. She could not believe he had not come to her room and thrown her out of the house.
What will I do now, she thought miserably, where shall I go?  I am running out of places. Naturally, she was angry with him, he had no right to talk to her that way.

Oh in Elbereth's name, why, oh why did I have to go and hit him, he was Lord of Imladris for goodness' sake, practically a King and I went and slapped him in the face.

The look he gave me after… Oh, Lady, stand by me, his lips, his hands, his eyes, the way he smells… a fresh deluge of tears. Oh my head hurts, what am I going to do?

He had not tried to come in her room at all, but when she had appeared downstairs in the beginning, he had come towards her and she had fled, afraid.

Kissing him, touching him, what sensations she had felt, strange and new. Her husband had not made her feel that way, so pleasant when Elrond touched her, it made her ache. He had put his hand between her legs and oh Eru, she had nearly jumped out of her skin.

What was happening, why was this happening?  Everything had been going along so smoothly, she was starting to feel at home here and now this and the tears burst forth again.

Clutching the balcony rail, watching the water crash into the rocks below, what a headache, why does my head ache?  Staring at the water falling, staring over the balcony at the rocks for hours, the water crashing, pounding relentlessly against the jagged cliff...

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Elrond sat in his chair in the small dining hall, looking up every time someone came in. He was not very interested in the food in front of him, but he forced himself to eat, determined to keep up appearances, to act normal somehow.

Arwen had come up to him yesterday and had said how awful Culurien looked and how she would not come out of her room because of grass and flowers and could he not fix her something? Umph, he had said.

Is she eating anything?  he had asked the maid who took up the tray, yes, a little, she had said. He had seen her downstairs, days ago and had tried to speak to her, to tell her how sorry he was, but she had disappeared.

He had not tried to see her in her room, not wanting to invade her refuge, hoping she still felt safe there.

She was so beautiful, her lips, her skin, her eyes, the way she smelled… he became lost in erotic thoughts… her breasts… he could think about her breasts all day.  Kissing her was heaven . . .

How she had moaned quietly when he touched her, the memory sending a thrill through him. Oh Eru, why had he ever said that to her, the look on her face… she was right, it was cruel. Why had he said it? He had been getting angry, angry at her, angry at Celebrían, angry at Gil-galad. For Mandos sake, do not start thinking about Gil-galad.

Why had he said something he knew would hurt her deeply? Was he trying to drive her away, did he do that on purpose, hurt her before she could hurt him? 

She was starting to hurt him, implying that he had no respect for her, implying that all he wanted was one thing, implying that he felt nothing for her health and well-being.

Something in him had lashed out, as though hurting her would protect him. He was so very tired of being hurt, why did it have to happen every time?  It was inevitable, he thought, probably better sooner than later, but he was sorry that he had said it, so sorry that he had said all of it about the annulment and everything. Was it possible? He really did not think so. If only there was a way around.

It was all so long ago, everything was such a long, long, time ago, why could he not forget and enjoy the present?  It all happened so long ago.  Ereinion, he thought with anguish, and sighed.  What difference did it make to anything now...

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