Pappy Sevi's Fairytales
By: Realmie
Author's notes: Thank you! Thank you sooooo much for all of your great reviews! I read them all I would answer but my e-mail's down right now. Sorry for the delay, honors English summer reading project. (ooohs and aaaahs from Sev, who thinks I'm a dunderhead). Hope you all enjoy the fourth chapter of Pappy Sevi.
***
Sevi: ***on the phone with Realmie*** So, are you any closer to coming home?
Me: I'm still lost, dunderhead!
Sevi: ***sighs***
Me: So, how are the trolls?
Sevi: Oh, they're fine, annoying as ever.
Me: How's Sirius?
Sevi: ***eye twitches*** He's making them food as we speak.
Me: That's nice to hear. You two getting along?
Sevi: Why do you ask those stupid questions!?
Sirius: ***Rubbing hands with a dish rag*** Is that Realmie? I wanna talk to her.
Sevi: Well you can't!
Me: Put him on!
***Sevi throws the phone at Sirius, rather hard***
Sirius: Hey, Realmie! What's news?
Me: Nothing, how are my sibs treating you?
Sirius: Not to bad, so long as they are well feed. Jackie and Michelle are at a sleepover.
Me: So, it's just you guys, eh? ***hears very loud yell that sounds like "DIIIIIIEEEEEE!!!!"*** Gottta go, remember, whatever you do, don't put them in the microwave! ***hangs up but not before we hear the words "SHI SHI HOKUDAN!"***
Sevi: So, what did the wicked witch of the weird say to you.
Sirius: ***impish smirk on face*** Just telling me how I'm her favorite…
Will: I wanna story!
Sevi: Not to night brat!
Sirius: And you wonder why this kid doesn't pay you any respect!
Sevi: ***in his soft deadly whisper ((swoon))*** I believe that RealmWanderer put me in charge long before you, Black!
Sirius: What you gonna do, cry about it!?
Will: Where's my story?
Sevi: ***snarl*** Hey Black, why don't we make this a little more interesting?
Sirius: How so, Snape?
Sevi: I bet, I can tell a better bed time story than you.
Sirius: What do I get when I win?
Sevi: You don't have to cook meals tomorrow night.
Sirius: And what do you have to do when you lose?
Sevi: ***in that cold voice of his*** If I lose.
Sirius: **grins** Trust me, you're gonna.
Sevi: ***growl*** The loser will have to sing the kids to sleep every night until RealmWanderer comes home. The kid will judge.
Sirius: Ha! Done! You go first!
Sevi: Fine! ***Sirius laughs and leaves*** Boy, I'm going to tell you the story of Pinocchio.
Will: Goody! I've never heard that one.
Sevi: Once upon a flaming time, there was a carpenter who had no children. So one day….
Will: What was the dude's name?
Sevi: Er….. Arthur…. Arthur Weasly.
Will: Hey! That name's almost as funny as yours!
Sevi: Insufferable brat…. Anyway, Mr. Weasly made a deal with a witch…
Will: What is it with you and witches?
Sevi: What is it with Michelle and asking everyone personal questions?
Will: I don't know…
Sevi: Well neither do I! Well, anyway, the deal was, the witch would make Mr. Weasly's next two puppets come alive is he would….er… marry her! So anyway, Mr. and Mrs. Weasly set to work and soon made two puppets, lone named Fred, and one named George!
Fred: Hi ho Kermit the frog here from sesame street news!
George: hey there hi there ho there come and join the jamboree! M-I-C-K-E-Y! M-O-U-S-E!
*~*~* Author's Notes: I couldn't resist! It was just too much!*~*~*
Sevi: So anyway, the twins Fred and George soon made a name for themselves the "Weasly Twins". Mr. and Mrs. Weasly knew that they got more than they bargained for. They cast them out onto the street and told them never to return unless they became real boys. Soon, they found out that the only way to become real is to stop playing pranks on people.
George: Screw being real!
Fred: We'd just being doing the same thing only without people yelling at us.
Sevi: So Fred and George lived insanely ever after. The End.
Sirius: Please! Let me tell a real story! Hey, Will, have you ever heard the story of the three little Hogwarts students?
Will: Is it like the three little pigs?
Sirius: Kinda, once upon a time, there were three Hogwarts students, Harry, Ron, and Hermione.
Will: I've heard those names somewhere…
Sirius: ***trying to change the subject*** Yes, yes, well, one day, their terrible teacher, Snape, made them do a terrible assignment.
Will: What?
Sirius: He made them make houses out of raw materials.
Will: Raw materials?
Sirius: Like straw and stone.
Will: Ah.
Sirius: Harry made his house out of straw. The big bad Snape came by and poured acid on his house. Harry's house of course, melted and Snape gave him a zero.
Will: Hey Sevi! This Snape dude sounds almost as mean as you!
Sirius: ***smiles*** Anyway, the big bad Snape then went to Ron house, which was made of sticks. The same thing happened to Ron house as with Harry's and they both got zeros.
Will: What about Hermione's?
Sirius: I'm getting there. When the big bad Snape got to Hermione's, which was made of new acid proof stones, Snape's vile plan didn't work, and Hermione got full marks.
Sevi: ***though clenched teeth*** You've got to be kidding me! And you have the nerve to say my story was bad!?
Will: That was such a cool story! Hermione got the better out of the big bad Snape, ha! That's great! He was mean!
Sirius: Heh heh heh, hear that Snape? I win!
Sevi: ***growls and stomps up stairs***
Sirius: Alright Will, up to bed it's late.
Will: Ok! ***gives Sirius a hug and runs upstairs***
Me: You would make a really great father.
Sirius: Realmie? What are you doing in the T.V.?
***View changes, we see myself inside the T.V.***
Me: Oh, the telephone was getting boring.
Sirius: ***smiles*** So, how are you doing?
Me: Oh, I'm fine. Ryoga's a little crazy, Dmaio's gone love sick, and Raven is angry that we can't find our way out of the forest.
Sirius: Sounds like fun.
Me: Yeah…sounds like fun.
Sirius: See any of the sights?
Me: No, but I've met the weirdest people.
Sirius: Not as weird as you for sure.
Me: For sure. Will in bed?
Sirius: Yep, and Snape's singing to him.
Me: Lucky boy! He won't sing for me, even when I ask nicely.
Sirius: You're a laugh in a half, so here any news while you're up East?
Me: Well, yea, a girls been kidnapped by a powerful being.
Sirius: Voldermort?
Me: ***shakes head*** No, something else, but this is going to postponed my coming home.
Sirius: So, you're not lost in Japan?
Me: Shhh, don't tell Sev!
Sirius: ***chuckles*** Alright.
Me: I gotta go. Bye. ***Sirius waves good bye and the scene goes blank***
***
Endnotes: Whew! Another one done! I hope you all liked it! Thanks to Shelly for the great idea about the three little pigs, and sorry Megan, but the Lion King is a movie not a Fairytale! As some of you might not know about Ranma ½ don't worry about it. It's only a dopey side story that has nothing to do with Pappy Sevi.
Now be good little boys and girls and wave your wands to the box below!
With hugs, flowers, and chocolate,
RealmWanderer
