Title: Aftermath
Author: Magicsunbeam
Email: magicsunbeam@ntlworld.com
Category: Angst - pure and simple angst / POV Janet
Pairing: None
Rating: G
Season/sequel: Companion piece to Sweet Little Lies.
Summary: Janet gets to deal with the aftermath of Jack's time on the planet.
Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property
of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, Gekko Productions; all
the powers that be, not me; This story is for entertainment purposes only
and no money exchanged hands. No copyright infringement intended. The story
is the property of the author and may not be posted without the author's
consent.
Author's notes: Fanx agayn to the wunerfull Whosthat for ficksing my spelin and grandma four me. ( (
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lost in paperwork, I didn't even hear it start.
The first I knew was when Kelly knocked on the stencil of my office door.
"Dr Fraiser. Sorry, I know you wanted your report done, but he's starting again."
It took a couple of seconds for what she had said to sink in. Then, sighing, I glanced at my watch. 1:21 am. I lay my pen down, got to my feet, and once again headed off to the side ward.
Colonel O'Neill was brought back from PXJ 739 with a rather large hole in his shoulder, a certain amount of alien toxin in his bloodstream, and a depression so deep I was more worried over that, than the whole lot put together.
The shoulder was healing nicely. The toxin had turned out to be nothing more than a natural sedative: the only lasting effects seemed to be some damned frightening nightmares. However, these added to the colonel's depressed state and had us all worried.
For whatever reason, tonight those nightmares seemed worse than usual. This was the third time I had been called to assist in calming our irate colonel. God alone knows what he was dreaming about, but I have a suspicion it has something to do with that damned plant.
Given the ferocity of the dreams, I congratulated myself on having brought the colonel out of the main ward and into a private room. I wouldn't have normally done that. However the previous night, after he had woken up from a bad dream for the second time, yelling and lashing out at anyone who was unfortunate enough to be too close, I decided he needed his privacy.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I was surprised, but relieved to find Teal'c in the room. The last time, it had been Daniel who bore the brunt of his friend's panicked outburst. They must have swapped shifts when I wasn't looking.
The Jaffa had his arms around O'Neill and was obviously trying to prevent him from getting out of bed. By the looks of it, he was struggling to do so.
However, Teal'c had the advantage of being in charge of his faculties. Pinned on the edge of the bed, legs dangling, our confused colonel was going nowhere.
I hurried round to O'Neill's side, noting that the IV lines had been ripped from his hand and were trailing along the floor. I only had to cast a glance Kelly's way and she went off for a fresh needle.
Satisfied that Teal'c had a strong enough hold; I brought myself to O'Neill's eye level. What I found eerie was that, despite his panic, there was no sound coming from him at all. He just struggled against Teal'c's grip.
"Colonel? Colonel O'Neill?" I took his face in my hands, attempting to catch his attention. "It's alright. It's just a dream. You're home now. Everything is okay."
I took a few seconds for his eyes to focus and then he became aware of his surroundings.
I could see he knew what had happened and he confirmed it by muttering; "Same old, same old?"
"Yes, Sir," I nodded sympathetically. "Same old, same old."
Exhaustion told its own tale when sighing, he leaned into Teal'c for a long moment, allowing the bigger man to take his weight. Teal'c raised an eyebrow in surprise. I have to admit, the gesture had me raise my *own* eyebrows. It was most unlike O'Neill to accept a helping hand, regardless of the situation.
I gave him a moment. Then, Teal'c and I assisted the colonel back into the bed. He didn't say a word, until Kelly approached and handed me the fresh IV needle.
"No."
I glanced up from the packet.
"Sorry, Sir?"
"No more drugs." He stated categorically.
Oh great, I thought, a fight. Just what we both need at this hour of the morning.
*Not*.
"Colonel, I'm afraid there is no option here. Your body has been through major trauma and the last thing you need now is an infection."
"No drugs," he repeated firmly.
"O'Neill, to recover sufficiently you must allow the Doctor to do her job." Teal'c intervened. "Your body requires the assistance of these drugs. It needs to rest."
Once again surprising us both, O'Neill virtually leapt at Teal'c.
"Will you just *back off*?! The last thing I need is to rest!"
Somewhere in my head, a buzzer sounded. Oh. I must be more tired than I thought. I missed that completely. He doesn't want to *sleep*.
I can't say I blame him either, having witnessed those nightmares.
Of course, Teal' is correct. O'Neill is exhausted and like it or not he needs to get some serious sleep. However, I know he's not going to change his mind and to argue with him at this stage, would be detrimental. The lack of sleeping meds doesn't worry me. Given the colonels physical condition, his body is about to give up the ghost anyway, and sooner rather than later, fatigue *will* overtake him. So for now, I resort to giving him his wish.
"Okay Colonel. Here's the deal. You allow me to keep feeding the anti- biotics and I hold off any sedative 'til you say so. How's that?"
He mulled the words over for a moment and then nodded once.
Before he had a chance to change his mind, I had the new needle in the back of his hand. I drew a batch of the anti-biotic and was about to inject it into the line when O'Neill grabbed my hand.
I studied his face, waiting for him to say something. He didn't have to speak. I could see the question in his eyes.
"It's just anti-biotic, Sir. I promise."
He held on for a moment longer, before accepting my word and then, still with a small amount of reluctance, he allowed me to finish the job. Once it was done, he turned his head away from us once more.
Teal'c cast me a glance, one eyebrow raised slightly.
Now, it's not every day that the man shows his emotions physically, but the concern in those dark eyes was plain to see. I gave what I hoped would pass for a reassuring smile. Stepping away from the bed, I gestured for Teal'c to follow.
"Why don't you go and get some rest?" I suggested. "There's nothing you can do right now and I doubt the colonel would notice you're gone."
He looked over to the colonel's bed, then back to me. "I would prefer to stay. You may need further assistance in restraining Colonel O'Neill."
"Thanks Teal'c, but I don't think we'll have any more trouble tonight," I tell him. "Kelly and I will manage."
He didn't look convinced, ~ probably because I didn't look the picture of confidence myself ~ but after a moment, he gave me a regal tilt of his head and left without another word.
Despite what they think of me round here, I hate to play the bad guy. Throwing people out of my infirmary ~ especially when I know their concerns are justified ~ hurts me too, but sometimes the occasion warrants it.
Like now.
Whilst I firmly believe that the people who are going to see Jack O'Neill through this crisis are his `kids`, I also believe he needs some space to breath. Time to think and work things out for himself. When he comes to terms with whatever it is that has him so down, *then* Daniel, Sam and Teal'c will be able to help pick up the pieces with him. But not until then.
I finished checking off the colonel's chart and glanced across at him. He still had his head turned away, a sign I took to leave him be. His eyes were fixed on the grey wall beside him, his face expressionless, his mind God knows where?
Turning on my heel, I left the man to his breathing space.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The shouting woke me with a start. At first I wasn't sure if someone had had the audacity to start an argument in my infirmary. Then I heard his voice as plain as day.
"*Get the hell off me! *"
I dragged myself off the battered couch, glancing at the clock on my desk.
03:23.
Damn. I had gone to check on the colonel at 02.30 and was pleased to find him sleeping quietly. He hadn't even lasted an hour this time.
Stepping into my shoes I moved quickly to the sideward. I prayed he wasn't going to be so bad this time. I had sent Kelly to bed a couple of hours before hand and didn't want to wake her if there was no need.
The colonel was no longer shouting, but was pretty upset. He had been moving about so much, he was caught up in the sheets. Struggling against them, his face was contorted with anger.
"No! Let me *go*! Get the hell off me!"
Now if there is anything I have learned whilst being around an injured Jack O'Neill, it is to be weary of flying fists when he is in the throes of a nightmare. Many have been complacent, and have come away sporting a variety of injuries because it. He's only got me twice and that is enough for me.
"Colonel?" I touched his shoulder lightly. "Colonel, come on back now, Sir."
I gave his arm a shake and *bam*! His fist flew at me faster than a rattler. As I said, twice is enough for me, and I executed a duck that would make Joe Louis weep.
The force of the swing was enough to bring the colonel into the here and now. Blinking madly he looked up at me, confusion eventually giving way to recognition. He didn't utter a word, just heaved the biggest, most desperate sigh I've heard in a long, long while.
I offered him a cup of water and he took it, downing the entire contents. He handed me the empty cup, before laying his good arm across his face. Another sign, but this time I wasn't going to go away.
"Colonel, we can't let this go on," I told him. "Your body can't take much more stress."
No answer.
"Sir, I don't know what happened on that planet, but I do know there is more damage than just the physical kind."
Still silence.
"Maybe it would help for you to talk to someone," I said, knowing that at least, would provoke a response. Sure enough, he lifted his arm and a pair of angry eyes glared at me.
"I didn't mean McKenzie," I quickly assured him. "Just ~ someone. Maybe Daniel?"
The arm dropped again.
"Colonel, please? You have people around you who care and are worried about you. Please, let someone *try* to help."
For the longest moment, there was no response. Then, very quietly he spoke.
"Thanks for your concern, Doc but there are some things you have to deal with alone."
I sat down on the edge of the bed.
"You don't have to deal with anything alone, Sir. I know Daniel has been hovering for two days now, just waiting for your call."
Silence again.
"Talk to him, Sir," I pleaded. "Let him try."
Another heavy sigh escaped him, followed by a long stretch of silence. Then, just as I thought sleep had claimed him once more, he dropped his arm and scrubbed a hand over his face.
"Okay. Okay," he said, wearily. "If that what it takes for people leave me the hell alone, then I'll have a nice talk with `Dear Daniel.` "
I was too flabbergasted to say anything.
Colonel Jack "Stand Alone" O'Neill had actually agreed to do as I asked. Of course, there was no guarantee he would actually go through with it. As old Scarlet would say; "Tomorrow *is* another day." but I wished Kelly had been there to make a bet with.
I looked at the haggard, bone-tired face before me and decided to push my luck one last time.
"You know you should try to sleep."
"No," he said firmly. "I'm fine."
"Sir. You're not fine. You need to sleep. Real, deep, restful sleep," I told him. "I could give you something that would get you past those bad dreams."
He eyed me, trying to work out if I was spinning him a line.
"Do you trust me?" I asked.
He hesitated for a second or two before he answered, "Yeah."
"Okay. So you believe me when I tell you; I can get you past those bad dreams?"
This time he nodded his head.
Within thirty seconds, I had injected the drug into his IV line.
Doubt showed on his face for just a second, as his eyes drifted shut.
I laid my hand on his. "It's okay, colonel. There are no demons waiting for you this time. I promise."
I don't know if he heard me or not, but his whole body relaxed a second later as he let go, and slipped away into dreamless oblivion.
I watched him sink further and further until, finally satisfied I had kept my promise to him, I quietly turned away. Leaving the man to his peace.
~~~~end~~~~
Author: Magicsunbeam
Email: magicsunbeam@ntlworld.com
Category: Angst - pure and simple angst / POV Janet
Pairing: None
Rating: G
Season/sequel: Companion piece to Sweet Little Lies.
Summary: Janet gets to deal with the aftermath of Jack's time on the planet.
Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property
of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, Gekko Productions; all
the powers that be, not me; This story is for entertainment purposes only
and no money exchanged hands. No copyright infringement intended. The story
is the property of the author and may not be posted without the author's
consent.
Author's notes: Fanx agayn to the wunerfull Whosthat for ficksing my spelin and grandma four me. ( (
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lost in paperwork, I didn't even hear it start.
The first I knew was when Kelly knocked on the stencil of my office door.
"Dr Fraiser. Sorry, I know you wanted your report done, but he's starting again."
It took a couple of seconds for what she had said to sink in. Then, sighing, I glanced at my watch. 1:21 am. I lay my pen down, got to my feet, and once again headed off to the side ward.
Colonel O'Neill was brought back from PXJ 739 with a rather large hole in his shoulder, a certain amount of alien toxin in his bloodstream, and a depression so deep I was more worried over that, than the whole lot put together.
The shoulder was healing nicely. The toxin had turned out to be nothing more than a natural sedative: the only lasting effects seemed to be some damned frightening nightmares. However, these added to the colonel's depressed state and had us all worried.
For whatever reason, tonight those nightmares seemed worse than usual. This was the third time I had been called to assist in calming our irate colonel. God alone knows what he was dreaming about, but I have a suspicion it has something to do with that damned plant.
Given the ferocity of the dreams, I congratulated myself on having brought the colonel out of the main ward and into a private room. I wouldn't have normally done that. However the previous night, after he had woken up from a bad dream for the second time, yelling and lashing out at anyone who was unfortunate enough to be too close, I decided he needed his privacy.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I was surprised, but relieved to find Teal'c in the room. The last time, it had been Daniel who bore the brunt of his friend's panicked outburst. They must have swapped shifts when I wasn't looking.
The Jaffa had his arms around O'Neill and was obviously trying to prevent him from getting out of bed. By the looks of it, he was struggling to do so.
However, Teal'c had the advantage of being in charge of his faculties. Pinned on the edge of the bed, legs dangling, our confused colonel was going nowhere.
I hurried round to O'Neill's side, noting that the IV lines had been ripped from his hand and were trailing along the floor. I only had to cast a glance Kelly's way and she went off for a fresh needle.
Satisfied that Teal'c had a strong enough hold; I brought myself to O'Neill's eye level. What I found eerie was that, despite his panic, there was no sound coming from him at all. He just struggled against Teal'c's grip.
"Colonel? Colonel O'Neill?" I took his face in my hands, attempting to catch his attention. "It's alright. It's just a dream. You're home now. Everything is okay."
I took a few seconds for his eyes to focus and then he became aware of his surroundings.
I could see he knew what had happened and he confirmed it by muttering; "Same old, same old?"
"Yes, Sir," I nodded sympathetically. "Same old, same old."
Exhaustion told its own tale when sighing, he leaned into Teal'c for a long moment, allowing the bigger man to take his weight. Teal'c raised an eyebrow in surprise. I have to admit, the gesture had me raise my *own* eyebrows. It was most unlike O'Neill to accept a helping hand, regardless of the situation.
I gave him a moment. Then, Teal'c and I assisted the colonel back into the bed. He didn't say a word, until Kelly approached and handed me the fresh IV needle.
"No."
I glanced up from the packet.
"Sorry, Sir?"
"No more drugs." He stated categorically.
Oh great, I thought, a fight. Just what we both need at this hour of the morning.
*Not*.
"Colonel, I'm afraid there is no option here. Your body has been through major trauma and the last thing you need now is an infection."
"No drugs," he repeated firmly.
"O'Neill, to recover sufficiently you must allow the Doctor to do her job." Teal'c intervened. "Your body requires the assistance of these drugs. It needs to rest."
Once again surprising us both, O'Neill virtually leapt at Teal'c.
"Will you just *back off*?! The last thing I need is to rest!"
Somewhere in my head, a buzzer sounded. Oh. I must be more tired than I thought. I missed that completely. He doesn't want to *sleep*.
I can't say I blame him either, having witnessed those nightmares.
Of course, Teal' is correct. O'Neill is exhausted and like it or not he needs to get some serious sleep. However, I know he's not going to change his mind and to argue with him at this stage, would be detrimental. The lack of sleeping meds doesn't worry me. Given the colonels physical condition, his body is about to give up the ghost anyway, and sooner rather than later, fatigue *will* overtake him. So for now, I resort to giving him his wish.
"Okay Colonel. Here's the deal. You allow me to keep feeding the anti- biotics and I hold off any sedative 'til you say so. How's that?"
He mulled the words over for a moment and then nodded once.
Before he had a chance to change his mind, I had the new needle in the back of his hand. I drew a batch of the anti-biotic and was about to inject it into the line when O'Neill grabbed my hand.
I studied his face, waiting for him to say something. He didn't have to speak. I could see the question in his eyes.
"It's just anti-biotic, Sir. I promise."
He held on for a moment longer, before accepting my word and then, still with a small amount of reluctance, he allowed me to finish the job. Once it was done, he turned his head away from us once more.
Teal'c cast me a glance, one eyebrow raised slightly.
Now, it's not every day that the man shows his emotions physically, but the concern in those dark eyes was plain to see. I gave what I hoped would pass for a reassuring smile. Stepping away from the bed, I gestured for Teal'c to follow.
"Why don't you go and get some rest?" I suggested. "There's nothing you can do right now and I doubt the colonel would notice you're gone."
He looked over to the colonel's bed, then back to me. "I would prefer to stay. You may need further assistance in restraining Colonel O'Neill."
"Thanks Teal'c, but I don't think we'll have any more trouble tonight," I tell him. "Kelly and I will manage."
He didn't look convinced, ~ probably because I didn't look the picture of confidence myself ~ but after a moment, he gave me a regal tilt of his head and left without another word.
Despite what they think of me round here, I hate to play the bad guy. Throwing people out of my infirmary ~ especially when I know their concerns are justified ~ hurts me too, but sometimes the occasion warrants it.
Like now.
Whilst I firmly believe that the people who are going to see Jack O'Neill through this crisis are his `kids`, I also believe he needs some space to breath. Time to think and work things out for himself. When he comes to terms with whatever it is that has him so down, *then* Daniel, Sam and Teal'c will be able to help pick up the pieces with him. But not until then.
I finished checking off the colonel's chart and glanced across at him. He still had his head turned away, a sign I took to leave him be. His eyes were fixed on the grey wall beside him, his face expressionless, his mind God knows where?
Turning on my heel, I left the man to his breathing space.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The shouting woke me with a start. At first I wasn't sure if someone had had the audacity to start an argument in my infirmary. Then I heard his voice as plain as day.
"*Get the hell off me! *"
I dragged myself off the battered couch, glancing at the clock on my desk.
03:23.
Damn. I had gone to check on the colonel at 02.30 and was pleased to find him sleeping quietly. He hadn't even lasted an hour this time.
Stepping into my shoes I moved quickly to the sideward. I prayed he wasn't going to be so bad this time. I had sent Kelly to bed a couple of hours before hand and didn't want to wake her if there was no need.
The colonel was no longer shouting, but was pretty upset. He had been moving about so much, he was caught up in the sheets. Struggling against them, his face was contorted with anger.
"No! Let me *go*! Get the hell off me!"
Now if there is anything I have learned whilst being around an injured Jack O'Neill, it is to be weary of flying fists when he is in the throes of a nightmare. Many have been complacent, and have come away sporting a variety of injuries because it. He's only got me twice and that is enough for me.
"Colonel?" I touched his shoulder lightly. "Colonel, come on back now, Sir."
I gave his arm a shake and *bam*! His fist flew at me faster than a rattler. As I said, twice is enough for me, and I executed a duck that would make Joe Louis weep.
The force of the swing was enough to bring the colonel into the here and now. Blinking madly he looked up at me, confusion eventually giving way to recognition. He didn't utter a word, just heaved the biggest, most desperate sigh I've heard in a long, long while.
I offered him a cup of water and he took it, downing the entire contents. He handed me the empty cup, before laying his good arm across his face. Another sign, but this time I wasn't going to go away.
"Colonel, we can't let this go on," I told him. "Your body can't take much more stress."
No answer.
"Sir, I don't know what happened on that planet, but I do know there is more damage than just the physical kind."
Still silence.
"Maybe it would help for you to talk to someone," I said, knowing that at least, would provoke a response. Sure enough, he lifted his arm and a pair of angry eyes glared at me.
"I didn't mean McKenzie," I quickly assured him. "Just ~ someone. Maybe Daniel?"
The arm dropped again.
"Colonel, please? You have people around you who care and are worried about you. Please, let someone *try* to help."
For the longest moment, there was no response. Then, very quietly he spoke.
"Thanks for your concern, Doc but there are some things you have to deal with alone."
I sat down on the edge of the bed.
"You don't have to deal with anything alone, Sir. I know Daniel has been hovering for two days now, just waiting for your call."
Silence again.
"Talk to him, Sir," I pleaded. "Let him try."
Another heavy sigh escaped him, followed by a long stretch of silence. Then, just as I thought sleep had claimed him once more, he dropped his arm and scrubbed a hand over his face.
"Okay. Okay," he said, wearily. "If that what it takes for people leave me the hell alone, then I'll have a nice talk with `Dear Daniel.` "
I was too flabbergasted to say anything.
Colonel Jack "Stand Alone" O'Neill had actually agreed to do as I asked. Of course, there was no guarantee he would actually go through with it. As old Scarlet would say; "Tomorrow *is* another day." but I wished Kelly had been there to make a bet with.
I looked at the haggard, bone-tired face before me and decided to push my luck one last time.
"You know you should try to sleep."
"No," he said firmly. "I'm fine."
"Sir. You're not fine. You need to sleep. Real, deep, restful sleep," I told him. "I could give you something that would get you past those bad dreams."
He eyed me, trying to work out if I was spinning him a line.
"Do you trust me?" I asked.
He hesitated for a second or two before he answered, "Yeah."
"Okay. So you believe me when I tell you; I can get you past those bad dreams?"
This time he nodded his head.
Within thirty seconds, I had injected the drug into his IV line.
Doubt showed on his face for just a second, as his eyes drifted shut.
I laid my hand on his. "It's okay, colonel. There are no demons waiting for you this time. I promise."
I don't know if he heard me or not, but his whole body relaxed a second later as he let go, and slipped away into dreamless oblivion.
I watched him sink further and further until, finally satisfied I had kept my promise to him, I quietly turned away. Leaving the man to his peace.
~~~~end~~~~